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Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal.
I heard this quote recently: ""The truth is like castor oil. It’s difficult to take and hard to swallow, so we get them to laugh and while their mouths are open, we pour a little in." -Harold Clurman
If you have an urgent question, please post it on the main page. Real life keeps me busy and has enough going on to keep me from being on here 24/7.... I hope yours does too! ;)
Current book recommendation: Untethered Soul, by Michael Singer. A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. The Power of Now, also by Eckhart Tolle. Really powerful stuff in there about not letting your runaway thoughts take over your life. Be present in the Now. You have what you need, right there, right inside yourself. Do yourself a HUGE favor and read these books. They may lead to an important and fundamental shift in your well-being. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." --Eckhart Tolle
All time fave relationship figure out book: A Fine Romance, Judith Sills, PhD. Buy if you are stuck and can't figure out why he won't commit, or why you keep picking guys who can't commit.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck." -The Dalai Lama
"Most people are doing the best they can, given what they know and understand. Including you. If they knew more and were aware of more, they would do things differently." -- Louise Hay
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain
I like these links right now: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4593/A-Simple-Way-to-Let-Go-of-Our-Negative-Patterns.html
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/04/04/25-life-lessons/
So here's the thing. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Weakness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Actually, according to Albert Einstein, that's the definition of insanity but I think that's a bit of a strong word choice.
“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” -The Dalai Lama.
The choices you make may affect others. Think about the consequences, intended or unintended, before you do something that you may have to explain later. Imagine you are standing in front of a group of people and have to defend what you chose to do.... if you can't manage to do it well, that's a fairly plain indicator it's a bad idea.
If everyone who loves you hates your partner, there might be a problem. If you only have your partner, there IS a problem.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8202/12-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship.html
If he’s mean to you now, he’s only going to get worse. Some people are energy vampires; they feed on the pain they inflict on others. They are broken. They will break you. Get out. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can fix him. You can’t.
You have my permission to say “no.”
If you are depressed, think of it like an illness. You have to treat it. Medicine can help. Talk to your doctor. If you’re drinking a lot, you’re already self-medicating. You might as well get some prescription-grade pharmaceuticals to help you get to a point where you can figure out why you’re self-medicating.
There’s a reason it’s called ‘junk food.’
Yoga is good for the body and the mind as well as soothing the spirit. Try it. Brisk walks are great too.
Don't eat crap. Canned sugary beverages or canned diet beverages are NOT good for you, they have no nutritional value and set you up for a lot of bad stuff. Don't drink them. Water is good. Decide if you can tolerate coffee or tea (I love them both) and then drink those in moderation.
Life is nasty, cold, brutal, unfair, and crappy. It’s also amazing, beautiful, uplifting, awe-inspiring and fun. You choose how you’re going to approach it every day.
I have a few soapboxes that I tend to haul out: I don't like to see people put their health or future at risk and I REALLY don't like to see them put other's health or future at risk. I feel strongly that not providing good sex education or keeping sex education from children is a form of child abuse. It's like sending them out into the world not knowing how to buckle a seatbelt.
I love this video from plannedparenthood.org (How Pregnancy Happens): http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
More good information from plannedparenthood.org on the various methods of birth control:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
I don't have any expertise in abusive relationships, but I do think there are some common sense basics that people who are in one might be missing. Find out more here: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal. |
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| Latest articles: Questions to ask before getting married!
No replies yet... 24 March 2016: I just read a great article in the New York Times online. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married” It was written by Eleanor Stanford and posted March 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com...
Need Christmas or other holiday gift ideas? Look here!
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Newest answer was posted
11 November 2011: A Primer on Women and Sex Look, we girls are funny. We don't sexually mature all overnight, our first sexual experiences are often painful, crappy and frankly unfulfilling on many levels. We don't know how to give blowjobs, most of us don't grow up ...
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26 January 2011: Each year, we here at DearCupid see many submissions asking, "What should I get my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/lover/partner for Valentine's Day?" I think it would be great to consolidate these questions and some ideas into one place, so I've ...
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1 May 2008: I posted this as an answer to a young man, a virgin, who wanted to know about his young girlfriend, also a virgin... First, I know it's hard to believe but a girl her age may not know her body very well. She may not know what is sexually stimula...
More than one way to get up the Duff!!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 March 2008: Some us ‘Aunts’ have been entertaining ourselves with fundamental questions about various ways pregnancy occurs…. I remembered that there were strange stories surrounding the births of some of the gods and goddesses of ancient myth, and I had a ...
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Is it up to me to keep his morals in check?
Q. Hey! I am predominantly lesbian, and slept with my first man last year at the age of 27. I didn't have any sort of romantic interest in him, it was just a lust thing. Anyway, he's okay, and we became sort of friends-with-benefits - hard, because ...
A. 24 May 2012: I think Cerberus summed it up nicely. Good thing you now know he's a liar and willing to deceive those around him. Why do people do that? I believe some people think with their genitalia. He must fall into that category. I think some people feel the ... (read in full...)
Did I make the right decision by asking the question I was afraid to have an answer to?
Q. I just cornered my boyfriend of a year and a half and asked of he saw a future with me. He said he can't make me any promises and that his future is shady - but that he loves me My gut has been fearing this for awhile. He told me to get Some sle...
A. 18 May 2012: When I was in a similar situation, years ago, where I was waiting for a guy to decide where we stood, I talked to a male friend of mine. He put me on the right track, said, oh no, you don't, you don't sit around having handed him all the power, fret ... (read in full...)
Is it up to me to keep his morals in check?
Q. Hey! I am predominantly lesbian, and slept with my first man last year at the age of 27. I didn't have any sort of romantic interest in him, it was just a lust thing. Anyway, he's okay, and we became sort of friends-with-benefits - hard, because ...
A. 18 May 2012: Ahhh, okay, sorry, I thought it was a bit overly dramatic, I apologize that I didn't recognize it was a joke. I guess the issue is resolved and perhaps you have learned a bit more about yourself? I wish you well, and safe travels!... (read in full...)
Is it up to me to keep his morals in check?
Q. Hey! I am predominantly lesbian, and slept with my first man last year at the age of 27. I didn't have any sort of romantic interest in him, it was just a lust thing. Anyway, he's okay, and we became sort of friends-with-benefits - hard, because ...
A. 17 May 2012: Sounds like a lot of drama going on in their lives. Perhaps he chose her because some part of him recognized she liked to sneak around too? As you said in your original post, you've never been monogamous and open relationships make perfect sense. So ... (read in full...)
Did I make the right decision by asking the question I was afraid to have an answer to?
Q. I just cornered my boyfriend of a year and a half and asked of he saw a future with me. He said he can't make me any promises and that his future is shady - but that he loves me My gut has been fearing this for awhile. He told me to get Some sle...
A. 17 May 2012: If you had collapsed with a flu-like symptoms, wouldn't you expect him to sleep in a different bed? He showed up when needed, a good sign. Standoffish isn't bad, you were ill and trying to push you to be intimate or discuss things would have been ... (read in full...)
Is it up to me to keep his morals in check?
Q. Hey! I am predominantly lesbian, and slept with my first man last year at the age of 27. I didn't have any sort of romantic interest in him, it was just a lust thing. Anyway, he's okay, and we became sort of friends-with-benefits - hard, because ...
A. 17 May 2012: I agree with Cerberus.
I guess the easy way out of a moral dilemma is to ignore one's previously stated principles. Just bypass 'em. Easy peasy.... (read in full...)
I have a crush on a local policeman
Q. Hi. Thanks for Helping me. Anyways, I have a dilemma. There is a school police officer at school and he seems to like me. I have noticed him glancing at me. When we are outside and I'm with my friends, he goes and stands around the area where we...
A. 16 May 2012: Good luck with figuring it out! I'm sure it will all make sense in a year or two! :)... (read in full...)
My mom is dating a 33 year old guy, who's closer in age to me than her! Its so embarrassing!!
Q. My mom who is 49 years old is now dating a guy who is 33 years old and I don't know how to feel about the whole situation. I mean he's closer in age to me than her, she's never done anything like this before so I don't know whats going on. She has ...
A. 16 May 2012: Let her choose her own partners. As to what they see in each other, well, isn't that for them to decide?
Why not celebrate that your mother is alive and vital and interested in dating instead of second-guessing her choices?
Unless there's somethin... (read in full...)
He never calls ...
Q. Dear Cupid My bf for the past few months is avoiding me too much. He never calls even if i call he says he is busy or hanging out with friends and cuts the call. Its been very long since we talked or hanged out for long. I miss him a lot, i tr...
A. 16 May 2012: Stop trying to make things work. Another aunt refers to it as 'stop being the only one rowing the relationship boat."
If you don't hear from him in a week or two, assume that the relationship is over. If he's not making an effort to keep in cont... (read in full...)
I have a crush on a local policeman
Q. Hi. Thanks for Helping me. Anyways, I have a dilemma. There is a school police officer at school and he seems to like me. I have noticed him glancing at me. When we are outside and I'm with my friends, he goes and stands around the area where we...
A. 16 May 2012: You mean you never said to any of them "isn't that officer kinda cute?" Just to make sure he's not making the same kind of eyes at them? Chances are he's checking them out too....
I'll bet if you ask them tomorrow, someone will share a similar stor... (read in full...)
Is this abuse or just a bad temper?
Q. How can you tell if your being emoitionly and verbely abused by your partner? my bfs bestfriend wich is now also my bestfriend asked me how do i put up with the abuse but i dint know i was? My boyfriend does call me names some times and yells at me ...
A. 16 May 2012: You are being emotionally and verbally abused if you are experiencing this from your boyfriend:
* you are called nasty names
* he raises his voice and yells at you frequently
* he swears at you
* he blames you for his negative emotions
* he t... (read in full...)
I have a crush on a local policeman
Q. Hi. Thanks for Helping me. Anyways, I have a dilemma. There is a school police officer at school and he seems to like me. I have noticed him glancing at me. When we are outside and I'm with my friends, he goes and stands around the area where we...
A. 16 May 2012: Why can't you tell your best friends? The thing about best friends is that you can tell them your deepest darkest most wicked secrets and they will tell you theirs. This secret sounds fairly common, nothing so risqué or weird unless you have ... (read in full...)
Why would my dad's girlfriend tell people that she is my mom when she knows that I don't even like her? I'm so mad at her!
Q. I just need some advice on how to approach something. Mothers day my family and my bosses parents came in to eat brunch(they were at different tables though) at the restaurant I work at. After dinner they ended up chatting and the conversation jus...
A. 16 May 2012: As your sister is a licensed psychologist, she will have access to people who can help you pursue the legal options at your disposal.
And the good news is that when she is gone for weeks on end without telling anyone, you can go visit your dad then... (read in full...)
Is it up to me to keep his morals in check?
Q. Hey! I am predominantly lesbian, and slept with my first man last year at the age of 27. I didn't have any sort of romantic interest in him, it was just a lust thing. Anyway, he's okay, and we became sort of friends-with-benefits - hard, because ...
A. 16 May 2012: Doesn't the term "open relationship" imply that all parties are aware that there are more sexual partners than just the two? So if this guy isn't disclosing his other sexual partners to her, then he's cheating on her.
I think that now that you know... (read in full...)
How do I make my girlfriend more ready for sex?
Q. Okay, so I am in love with my girlfriend and plan to spend the rest of my life with her. I am third year in college and she is in college as well. However, this is a long distance relationship. She is still a virgin and I am not. We say I love you ...
A. 15 May 2012: You have a couple of things working against you. One is the LDR thing. I was in one for a couple of years, we were both in our 30s so it wasn't like we were novices at sex but I do remember feeling a bit pressured to get to the sex bit right away ... (read in full...)
How can I get custody of my sister?
Q. okay so i know this is a love advice site but ive been given great advice in the past so here it goes... so my sister who is 15 had to move to my aunts last year because my dad was going to prison, well he's out now and shes being forced to come b...
A. 15 May 2012: Here's a hotline you could call that may be of some help: http://www.childhelp.org/pages/hotline-home
I will look for other links but I think your best bet is to contact a family lawyer who is familiar with the local statutes and family court.
Go... (read in full...)
How can I get custody of my sister?
Q. okay so i know this is a love advice site but ive been given great advice in the past so here it goes... so my sister who is 15 had to move to my aunts last year because my dad was going to prison, well he's out now and shes being forced to come b...
A. 15 May 2012: Who is forcing her to return?... (read in full...)
I want to move on from my ex but my shyness is holding me back with new guys!
Q. I want to move on after my ex-boyfriend disappeared on me 6 months ago, what I mean by that is I feel I'm ready for a friendship or even a love relationship with a man. The thing is I cannot start a conversation for the life of me I am pretty s...
A. 15 May 2012: Practice saying these words, in front of the mirror: "Hi, nice to meet you, my name is ________, what's yours?" Smile a little when you say those words. You don't have to grin from ear to ear.
Record yourself saying those words, so you get comf... (read in full...)
What should I do to make him notice?
Q. Here it goes. I've had this close guy friend for at least 4 years now and when i was bullied a lot at school and cried he was always there. But you see, since we moved on to high school i don't even see him anymore and i try to text him but he ...
A. 15 May 2012: Oh, dear, I used to hate this, when one of my friends became distant. It was always so sad and felt so wrenching. It's even worse when it's someone you have more than friendly feelings for, too.
The only way to cope, really, is to make sure that... (read in full...)
Did he like me or did I just imagine it?
Q. I recently came across someone at workplace whom iam still not sure was friendly or friendlier or merely helpful ... His eye contact was constant..The smile on his lips never died down quickly whenever he spoke to me..His eyes seemed to light up...I ...
A. 15 May 2012: So you worked together but didn't become friends, to the extent he never told you about his personal life? I think it's fairly safe to say he was being friendly, perhaps a bit flirtatious, but nothing more than that.
To get over him, remember that... (read in full...)
Problems and worries about dry sex!
Q. I have been in a relationship with this guy for about 3 months. Quite recently, we started having dry sex, with clothes on and gradually, just in undergarments. However, I'm starting to feel insecure. I did my research on Dry Sex and many sou...
A. 15 May 2012: I think maybe the problem is that you aren't quite ready for this sexual activity. You have a great deal of stress and worry surrounding being sexual with him and want to say 'no,' but don't know how to. That tells us that you two are being more ... (read in full...)
Should I go to a sexually charged movie with a male friend?
Q. This might seem like a stupid problem, but i'd like some advice. A guy i know ( he's not really a friend, more like an aquaintance ) wants to go to the cinema with me tomorrow, to watch the new American Pie film. The thing is, there are lots of ...
A. 15 May 2012: Wow, this question doesn't really sound like it's coming from someone in the 26-29 year old age group.
A. You feel uncomfortable with this guy because he's indicated he wants more from you. So why go on what is essentially a date with him?
B. Yo... (read in full...)
What are his intentions towards me?
Q. Hi, Something has been bodering me this while,I met a guy few months ago,he is so nice and unique,so different and special.we actually met online and we got chating.He posted his picture online,I made a wonderful comment and it really turn his head...
A. 15 May 2012: I think his intentions towards you are to keep you sweet as a friend. Or possibly to ask you for money.
I would be wary and stick to real life friends for the time being.
Good luck!... (read in full...)
Am I stupid for letting him use me just because I miss him?
Q. i had a boyfriend for about 2 years, on and off. when we were 'going out with each other' we were friends with benefits. the last time we split up we both said some really hurtful things to each other and never spoke again, i still used to see him ...
A. 15 May 2012: Sweetie, when you look back on this time years from now, you will be sad for this teenaged you who couldn't see that she was worth way more than being a family friend's FWB.
Unrequited love can be extremely frustrating and extremely fascinating at t... (read in full...)
Problems and worries about dry sex!
Q. I have been in a relationship with this guy for about 3 months. Quite recently, we started having dry sex, with clothes on and gradually, just in undergarments. However, I'm starting to feel insecure. I did my research on Dry Sex and many sou...
A. 15 May 2012: Why can't you use condoms? Is there a particular reason?... (read in full...)
LDR not working and I've met someone closer. Do I end things?
Q. Hey im 20 yrs old,,im in this dilemma,i have been dating my guy for the past one year but it doesnt seem to work due to the long distance,we rarely meet,like twice in a year,i met this guy in the city i live,i liked him and i decided to give it a ...
A. 15 May 2012: Happy to hear your followup. I hope everything works out for you!... (read in full...)
My Indian family, my Pakistani ex gf who still lives at my place, my American girlfriend who's treated like an outsider and me...its a wreck!!
Q. I'm 21 years old, turning 22 this year. My girlfriend is 20, and turning 21 this year. We've been together for 3 years, and I want to ask her to marry me within the next week or so. Here's the problem. I'm Indian, and she's American. My p...
A. 15 May 2012: I read Foot-in-My-Mouth's post and have to admit that the cultural component may be important to you. I would adopt a different strategy to relocation, then, by emphasizing the health factor. Tell your family that alas, you have developed allergie... (read in full...)
How do I convince my mother to let me cut my hair short?
Q. I have long waist length beautiful healthy hair. But the trouble is that i dont like them at all. I want to get them cut short because i like hair better that way. My mother apparantly doesnot understand me and she does not even let me do the ...
A. 15 May 2012: Can't you simply have an unfortunate incident involved chewing gum which tangles in your hair so badly there's no choice but to cut it off? Or 'mistake' your hair removal cream for your hair conditioner and accidentally melt it off? Singe it off ... (read in full...)
My Indian family, my Pakistani ex gf who still lives at my place, my American girlfriend who's treated like an outsider and me...its a wreck!!
Q. I'm 21 years old, turning 22 this year. My girlfriend is 20, and turning 21 this year. We've been together for 3 years, and I want to ask her to marry me within the next week or so. Here's the problem. I'm Indian, and she's American. My p...
A. 15 May 2012: The only person in this entire scenario whose circumstances you can change is.... *drumroll* ... you. You yourself hold the key to your freedom.
Instead of buying a ring for a promise of an engagement, take that money and go sign a lease on an apar... (read in full...)
Did I make the right decision by asking the question I was afraid to have an answer to?
Q. I just cornered my boyfriend of a year and a half and asked of he saw a future with me. He said he can't make me any promises and that his future is shady - but that he loves me My gut has been fearing this for awhile. He told me to get Some sle...
A. 14 May 2012: Breathe. Stop panicking. You've asked a question that has been troubling you and obviously, you two aren't running along the same path in synchronicity. That's why you're freaking out and that may be why he's freaking out.
It's okay.
Give him some... (read in full...)
I get excited by dumping women and crushing them emotionally... what can I do to fix it?
Q. I'm married and I have a baby. I'm also very happy in my marriage and my wife is good looking etc. Yes, I've gone to prostitutes for a few years now, but only to get a physical release to substitute porn. Though, in recent years I've for some ...
A. 14 May 2012: For the next scene in this movie, read about Tiger Woods.
"Do I have a serious mental issue? OR do some guys actually do this?"
Yes, and yes.
Buy some stock in companies who are working on the HIV vaccine and STD treatments. You'll be in the ma... (read in full...)
I managed to convince a guy I fancy that I'm easy but now I need the skills to back it up
Q. I moved about 9 months ago and there's this guy "Sam" back home. My friend and I tricked him into thinking I'm a slut and he likes me better now. I told him when I get home I'd make out with him and give him a hand job. The thing is, I HAVE NO IDEA ...
A. 14 May 2012: You are clearly not 18-21. This sounds like a question from someone about 13 years old.
If you have to ask, you are so not ready.... (read in full...)
Is this a normal thing to do?
Q. So, my wife and I have been married for 3 years now. I know masturbation is a normal and natural thing, but I hate when she does it. Like, the other nite I could tell she started when we went to bed...So I tried to be a part of it because I don't ...
A. 11 May 2012: "It almost seemed like she would have rather been doing it alone than be stimulated in any way by me." Well, perhaps she wanted to feel a certain way and knew that you wouldn't be happy with the situation?
And to continue, if you are feeling inse... (read in full...)
Is this a normal thing to do?
Q. So, my wife and I have been married for 3 years now. I know masturbation is a normal and natural thing, but I hate when she does it. Like, the other nite I could tell she started when we went to bed...So I tried to be a part of it because I don't ...
A. 11 May 2012: I think your wife was sending you a little message. She was saying, "Hey, it's time to put me first. You think that sex is all about you. Guess what, I have my own needs and I'm not going to veer off achieving my own pleasure right now.
"... (read in full...)
My girlfriend doesn't pay her bills!
Q. plz help with some advice as im in a lesbian relationship with a woman who i dont live with as im at parents but stay at girlfriends alot. shes not paying her bills and doesnt have a t.v licence and people knock the door alot. what will happen as ...
A. 11 May 2012: http://www.adviceguide.org.uk/england/consumer_e/phones_tv_internet_and_computers_index_e/consumer_tips_phones_tv_internet_computers_e/about_tv_licences.htm
I googled 'citizens advice bureau' and then followed links. I think you should not move in u... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to send flirty messages when one is married and the other involved?
Q. Question I trust my guy of over 16 months but angers me that he send flirty suggestive taggs to one particular woman and she sends them back, she is married. I feel this is sends out the wrong message and when I sat down and talked with him about ...
A. 11 May 2012: I think he thinks you two are best friends. Are you in a sexual relationship or is this a purely platonic thing?
Maybe he needs deleting from your life if he can't tell the difference?... (read in full...)
My moms health is getting worse and she refuses to see a doctor?
Q. Hi, I could really use some advice. My mom is not well. She has some kind of mood disorder which causes her to cry, lash out in extreme anger, and then be perfectly fine. Sometimes all of these moods happen in the same day. I have asked a doctor, ...
A. 11 May 2012: "Mom, I'm concerned about you. You've been having major mood swings and big fights with Dad. I hate to see you suffering and so I'm going to ask that you see a doctor. When I talked to you about this in the past, you got angry and lashed out. I ... (read in full...)
I don't want my mom to wear a bikini on holiday, its so embarassing!
Q. Having some trouble with my mom. What should I do? My mom, my younger brother and I will be going to Hawaii soon. I'm 15 years old. I'm all excited about going to Hawaii but I'm not happy with my mom buying a two piece bikini. She's in her early 40...
A. 11 May 2012: Hey, one last post on this. Could you do us aunts here a big favor? Please post on how the vacation in Hawaii went and how the whole bathing suit choice turned out. We so rarely get followups, it's nice when someone who has asked a question gives us ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend still sends his ex-wife a Mother's Day card and gift card!
Q. Good day all I need objective opinions please! BF still sends his ex wife a mothers day card and gift card despite divorcing him for a new man, who she resides with. She dumps their daughter on day care and her parents do its not like she is mom of ...
A. 10 May 2012: If you think about it, he was the one who made her a mom. I get that you might be uncomfortable with the card, and that you are wary about his residual feelings for her. Everyone has their own parenting style and accessing child care and letting the ... (read in full...)
I'm trying so hard to like her, and get to know her so I can develop feelings.
Q. I met this girl who genuinely likes me, made the first move, and such... I'm trying so hard to like her, and get to know her so I can develop feelings. I believe relationships shouldn't be unrequited. I guess some things really drag me dow...
A. 10 May 2012: Do you like her? Quick, yes or no. There's no wrong answer.... (read in full...)
Am I stupid for being jealous of her?
Q. I'm not really sure where to start and no matter what i write i'm still going to sound like a bad person but trust me i'm not. Very long story short, me and this guy from school got back in touch via Facebook. We met up and after meeting up a few ...
A. 10 May 2012: Sorry your first time was with a jerk. It happens, alas, you can't undo it. You are resisting the reality if you keep regretting it, though, and that resistance inside you is keeping the pain alive a lot longer.
You need to relax, breathe, ackn... (read in full...)
I've given him three chances, now he's saying he'll stop! What should I do?
Q. i was dating a guy from the last 4 years. Around 6 months back i got to know that he was cheating on me and when i confronted him he said sorry and asked me to give one chance and i gave him another chance. And,after 2 months again i got to know ...
A. 10 May 2012: He's had three chances and blew them all. I would dump him right away. The sooner you get away from the lying cheater, the sooner you can find a decent guy who won't be a player.
Good luck!... (read in full...)
Met an amazing girl but she thinks I'm younger!
Q. Ok, i have been dating a lovely girl for a few weeks. We met through a friend and hit it off right away. She's 21 and i am 29. We have been on loads of dates and the other night, we were talking about birthday plans and she said to me " oh, your 24, ...
A. 10 May 2012: Um, not to put too fine a point on it, but you are 29. Not 19. Time to act like a grown up and deal with it. It's a pity your friend faked a passport as that really sounds like she's been setup by you and your friend, but it's time to come clean.
T... (read in full...)
How to word a wedding invite so it doesn't sound tacky?
Q. I am the MOH for my friends wedding. This will be her second wedding and his first wedding. They both live in separate apartments. He has the typical bachelor pad with barely nothing. She is a little better off, but could really use some new things, ...
A. 10 May 2012: More guidance from the same site: http://www.emilypost.com/weddings/remarriage/443-second-shower
"My attendants want to have a shower for me, but I'm worried that people will think this is just too much, since I had showers the first time I was marr... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wont let me speak to any guys, not even to help out my friends!
Q. Hiii dear cupid..my question is why boyfriends are so possessive..im in a relationship..my bf is kind such a lovely guy..we met online on facebook..he doesnt allow me to talk with any boy..i accept this but there was a friend of mine who want my ...
A. 10 May 2012: His one teeny tiny problem is that he's a budding abusive partner. He may be a lovely charming, generous man with the exception that he wants to lock you up. That exception, alas, trumps the good stuff. He's not a good guy if he threatens or is ... (read in full...)
How to word a wedding invite so it doesn't sound tacky?
Q. I am the MOH for my friends wedding. This will be her second wedding and his first wedding. They both live in separate apartments. He has the typical bachelor pad with barely nothing. She is a little better off, but could really use some new things, ...
A. 10 May 2012: You wrote "Due to circumstances and wedding etiquette we are not throwing a typical bridal shower." So you are sticking to wedding etiquette? This means you do not signal, in any way, that gifts are expected at this shower. You don't put anything ... (read in full...)
I don't want my mom to wear a bikini on holiday, its so embarassing!
Q. Having some trouble with my mom. What should I do? My mom, my younger brother and I will be going to Hawaii soon. I'm 15 years old. I'm all excited about going to Hawaii but I'm not happy with my mom buying a two piece bikini. She's in her early 40...
A. 10 May 2012: Presumably she's not picking up and dropping you off at school wearing a bikini. None of your friends will see her in the bikini, as she will be wearing it at the beach in Hawaii.
Look, I know it makes you uncomfortable to think that your moth... (read in full...)
What kind of porn do straight girls watch?
Q. What kind of porn do straight girls watch? And how often do they do it?...
A. 10 May 2012: I don't think I'd be going out on a limb to say that of the girls who are watching porn, they probably watch the kind that interests them, each, individually. You're asking a really broad question. It's like asking, what kind of porn do straight... (read in full...)
What kind of porn do straight girls watch?
Q. What kind of porn do straight girls watch? And how often do they do it?...
A. 10 May 2012: Are you under the impression that there's a single type of porn that will work for every straight female who watches porn? Which should be a small number as it is indeed illegal for girls and boys in your age bracket.
Why do you ask?... (read in full...)
I don't want my mom to wear a bikini on holiday, its so embarassing!
Q. Having some trouble with my mom. What should I do? My mom, my younger brother and I will be going to Hawaii soon. I'm 15 years old. I'm all excited about going to Hawaii but I'm not happy with my mom buying a two piece bikini. She's in her early 40...
A. 10 May 2012: Before I answer, I want to know if you have ever worn any of the following fashions in the past few years:
*jeans or pants where the waistband is tucked UNDER your butt cheeks
*any jeans, pants or shorts where your underwear is clearly visible... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wont let me speak to any guys, not even to help out my friends!
Q. Hiii dear cupid..my question is why boyfriends are so possessive..im in a relationship..my bf is kind such a lovely guy..we met online on facebook..he doesnt allow me to talk with any boy..i accept this but there was a friend of mine who want my ...
A. 10 May 2012: How is he when you go out on dates?... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wont let me speak to any guys, not even to help out my friends!
Q. Hiii dear cupid..my question is why boyfriends are so possessive..im in a relationship..my bf is kind such a lovely guy..we met online on facebook..he doesnt allow me to talk with any boy..i accept this but there was a friend of mine who want my ...
A. 10 May 2012: He doesn't trust you. If he did, he wouldn't try to wall you off from the world.... (read in full...)
LDR not working and I've met someone closer. Do I end things?
Q. Hey im 20 yrs old,,im in this dilemma,i have been dating my guy for the past one year but it doesnt seem to work due to the long distance,we rarely meet,like twice in a year,i met this guy in the city i live,i liked him and i decided to give it a ...
A. 9 May 2012: Just be firm and consistent in breaking up with LDR guy. "No, it's not working out for me. Sorry but it's time for you to move on. I will not be your girlfriend even if you move here in September. Sorry, I have decided and that is the final ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wont let me speak to any guys, not even to help out my friends!
Q. Hiii dear cupid..my question is why boyfriends are so possessive..im in a relationship..my bf is kind such a lovely guy..we met online on facebook..he doesnt allow me to talk with any boy..i accept this but there was a friend of mine who want my ...
A. 9 May 2012: He's a lovely kind boy who doesn't let you decide for yourself what you feel is right and snoops in your Facebook? He doesn't sound lovely to me. He sounds like a controlling and insecure guy. ... (read in full...)
Did I make the right decision by asking the question I was afraid to have an answer to?
Q. I just cornered my boyfriend of a year and a half and asked of he saw a future with me. He said he can't make me any promises and that his future is shady - but that he loves me My gut has been fearing this for awhile. He told me to get Some sle...
A. 9 May 2012: If you want marriage and a family and he can't see the future after a year and a half with you, I think it is time to part ways with him. You want different things.
At least you know where you stand and can go forward from here, and you won't inve... (read in full...)
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