He's doing weed yet again despite all my ultimatums
Q. Hi So me and boyfriend will have been together for 3 years (March 11th) and are in the process of looking to buy our first home. However, throughout the relationship he has struggled with an addiction to weed. He has repeatedly told me he's q...
A. 2 March 2019: It wasn't an ultimatum if you didn't follow through. Why would he stop it when he knows you don't mean what you say? He's not taking you seriously because you aren't being serious. Say what you mean and mean what you say.
If you gave him a choice... (read in full...)
My girlfriend went behind my back and told my parents about our future plans. Am I right to be hurt?
Q. Hi everyone I've been with my girlfriend for a little over 2 years, the majority of this has been long distance (10 hour flight). We've been trying to find ways to close the distance and one way is to get married so i can sponsor her. I felt ...
A. 31 December 2018: Personally if this were me, I would tell her the deal is off until further notice. I would tell her you won't marry someone you can't trust, and her going behind your back to your parents is trying to force the issue.
You already aren't sure abo... (read in full...)
Are my parents right to punish me with a prison type punishment ?
Q. IS IT RIGHT THAT MY PARENTS HAVE PUT ME IN PRISON ? AND ARE THEY BEING MEAN FOR NOT LETTING ME GO OUT INTO OUR GARDEN ? I got caught shoplifting, my parents said they don't want to see me go to jail, so are punishing me severely, they h...
A. 29 July 2018: The punishment is fair. Don't be a disgusting little thief, and you won't have to deal with the consequences. A punishment is meant to be a punishment; it's not meant to be fun, and you shouldn't get a break.
Your parents are probably ashamed ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend said he liked my skinnier self and now I'm very hurt.
Q. I need help. Just had a big fight with my boyfriend of 5 years. We are in a hotel room travelling to Memphis and we were enjoying a week long road trip. I've put on some weight since we met. But then so has he. He had once told me he would...
A. 24 April 2018: Yes, you were in the wrong. If you can't handle him telling the truth, then don't ask him a leading questing and get butthurt over his answer.
Preferring the skinnier you doesn't mean he doesn't love you.
You've caused the argument. Apolog... (read in full...)
I asked my co-worker out but she said she would think about it. How long before I ask her again?
Q. Ok so I asked a girl I work with out to have dinner with me. We have been working together for around 6--8 months. I know her pretty well, but not really well, but in the end I just thought "who cares, go for it". So I asked her and she said it ...
A. 22 November 2017: Don't ask again. She's already told you it may get awkward as you work together. This is the reason you shouldn't date in the workplace. If you pester her, she could go to HR and you'll have caused yourself a whole heap of trouble. Drop it and leave ... (read in full...)
My world has come crashing down because my wife just told me that the daughter we've been raising is not mine but from her affair after the marriage!
Q. My wife and i have been married for 3 years, 6 months ago she told me something that rocked my core. the daughter i have been raising is not mine. she had an affair 2 years ago. the reason she cheated was that she was a virgin when we got married ...
A. 20 November 2017: Divorce her. Do a DNA test, as her word clearly means nothing. If the child is, in fact, not yours, I would sue her for at least some of the cost of raising the child when she deliberately lied to you about the paternity of the kid. You shouldn't be ... (read in full...)
Led into a fantasy and I like it
Q. The other night after having sex my girlfriend told me she wanted to do it again but that this time I could do whatever I wanted to her and she would let me. She said she would be my whore for the rest of the night. When we started up again she...
A. 13 November 2017: Join Fetlife, and read LOADS of the writings that pertain to your fantasies. There is information coming out of your ears when you start to look for it. If you visit Munches local to you, you will be able to get advice from people in the lifestyle ... (read in full...)
My wife is another man's slave
Q. My wife is deeply into S and M and I am not. I discovered that she has become the slave of another man, but still professes she loves me. I have allowed her to spend 2 or 3 nights a week with her dom. I don't think I can find any way to give her...
A. 7 October 2017: It annoys the fuck out of me that people still feel qualified to offer advice on a subject they know nothing about. OP, I am actively part of my kink scene. Some kink is sexually motivated, but a lot is not! Obviously I do not know you or your... (read in full...)
Am I being a drama queen? How can I deal with this?
Q. I know that to other people this is going to sound ridiculous, but this is a huge dilemma for me because I can't help how I feel. Maybe I'm really upset about something else and this is the tip of the iceberg. I am very uncomfortable wh...
A. 12 May 2017: Firstly, your looks shouldn't factor into this.
Warn her ONCE never to post photos with you in them without your permission first. Make it clear this is a one time warning. If she does, TELL her to remove them. Social media have options to repor... (read in full...)
What purpose does it serve to have women's clothing that exposes so much skin?
Q. Hey all, I have questions about women's fashion. This will probably make more sense to folks from the eastern part of the world. I'm sorry if this hurts sentiments but this is something I really do not understand. My city has changed a lot i...
A. 6 May 2017: Why do you choose the clothing you wear? (I assume) because you like them. Why does there need to be another reason? ... (read in full...)
I waited 3 years to tell my LDR boyfriend that I have 2 children and now he's unsure of how he feels
Q. I've been in a 3 year long distance relationship with my boyfriend. I'll admit I've been wrong in never disclosing to him that I've been married, divorced, and have two teenage children. I'm also 42 yrs old while he's only 33 yrs old. I've trav...
A. 16 April 2017: If I were him, and you'd lied to me for three years, you would be dumped so fast your head would spin. It wouldn't be a case of accepting/not accepting your children, but that you'd forced me into a three year long relationship without all the ... (read in full...)
New man doesn't want me to go to fetish party
Q. I arranged to go to kinky, fetish-scene party while single but now have new boyfriend who doesn't want me to go. Am I being unreasonable still wanting to go, even though he doesn't like it, and is not into that. He thinks I will be looking for ...
A. 27 February 2017: I can't believe the amount of people that clearly don't understand the 'scene'. I am actively part of my local kink scene, and I visit events regularly, alone or with friends (as I'm single), and at none of these events am I looking to hook up with ... (read in full...)
Uncles who lost your virginity at a later stage, how did you do it? Aunts what will really help me lose my virginity?
Q. How do you shake off being a virgin? While I have kissed a couple girls and have been sexual with some, I feel down on myself for not having had intercourse. I've read articles on this site, other sites about not feeling bad about it but it ...
A. 22 May 2016: You don't want to use a sex worker because you disagree worth women being used then discarded. Yet, you make no mention of wanting to get into a relationship and making a woman feel loved; only that you want sex. So... You are in effect ... (read in full...)
What do women think of very hairy guys?
Q. What do women think of very hairy guys? Is it a turn off and a major deal breaker when a guy is very hairy on his body? Be honest....
A. 3 May 2016: My opinion summed up in one word... LURVE!!!!!!!!!!!!
The more hair the better; everywhere it can grow; and facial hair a bonus, especially old fashioned huge sideburns, beards, etc.
It's good facial hair is making a comeback, but sad th... (read in full...)
If I don't orgasm does that mean I was used for sex?
Q. I've been struggling with this idea lately. I want to lose my vaginal virginity, but I know I probably won't get off so...How do I deal with not getting off but knowing the guy will? I could probably come from oral...But I still wouldn't be gett...
A. 20 April 2016: You seem to be of the opinion that the l purpose of sex is pleasure. It's not. The primary purpose of sex is to produce offspring. Pleasure is a nice bonus.
If you are assuming there must be a purpose to having sex, it's the primary one, needing,... (read in full...)
I need to break my duck with girls
Q. How to get over being a virgin? I'm turning 23 and no matter what I've tried it hasnt worked out. I've dated a couple girls in high school but we were "too young" to have sex according to the girls. We loved each other when we were dating but ...
A. 29 February 2016: There's no point telling you anything. You consistently ignore/shoot down everything you're told. Since you don't want advice, figure it out yourself and stop whinging.... (read in full...)
She refused me but tried fellatio with her fling. Do I have a right to be upset ?
Q. Hello! I'm 38.Me and my wife (42) have been married for 9 years now. We were in an on/off relationship for quite awhile before we settled down-we were at odds all the time which led us to break up and then get back together.The longest we'...
A. 16 January 2016: It doesn't matter how many times she has done it, or who with. She has told you that she doesn't like it.
The question should not be why won't she do something for me when she loves me; rather, why are YOU asking her to do something she has told... (read in full...)
Am I an idiot to keep responding to him?
Q. Met a guy from a dating site 2 years ago. Met him on and off throughout and we just meet for sex. last time i saw him was about two months ago. I would of liked him to of wanted more then sex but i know he doesn't. The sex is alright but i know he ...
A. 13 January 2016: Yes.... (read in full...)
Should I be freaking out because she gave a guy a bj when she was much younger?
Q. Modnote: this is very similar, in the circumstances, but NOT identical to an earlier question submitted recently - you may also find some good answers here: www.dearcupid.org/question/can-i-get-over-this-revelation-three-years.html below is what...
A. 14 July 2015: You should not post identical questions, that miss out important information, and acknowledge the advice so graciously given in your original question.
Excluding vital information, and rewording the question will not get you more favourab... (read in full...)
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