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... Send *ed1982 a private message | | | *ed1982's profile:Hey everyone
I am a 26 year old working mum of two. I have been married for coming up two years, but was a single parent for three years before that.
I enjoy answering peoples problems because I think that any way to help people has to be a good thing, and I think i'm quite an understanding person.
So ask away and I'll see what I can come up with. |
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Men can't read women
Q. Slashdot is a geek site focussing mostly on tech. Relationship advice is not something you will find there, but this story just has to be mentioned. http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/03/30/0028211 http://www.livescience.co...
A. 4 April 2008: I think it's a mixture of both. With my female friends I don't need to spell out what I mean, but with my husband it has to be letter by letter - literally or he just doesn't get it. I always get frustrated because I think that I have clearly said ... (read in full...)
Living with a depressed person - our sex life has vanished and I feel unattractive - how to cope??
Q. Is this normal?- living with a depressed person My boyfriend (whom i live with) is under treatment for depression. He is taking anti depressants and seeing a psychotherapist every 2 weeks. He seems to be slowly responding to his antidepr...
A. 4 April 2008: Living with someone with depression is really hard work. It will test your commitment that's for sure. Just remember that he is unwell at the minute. He doesn't want to feel like this, and may even be trying to drive you away as he feels guilty f... (read in full...)
My friend told me that guy just wanted sex, could that be true??
Q. Hello I met a guy last month. He's charming. He invited me to his home twice. And he's trying to get something more. I really like him. But I don't want to have sex with him since I am not ready. Recently, he became cold and seems to keep distan...
A. 4 April 2008: It may not be that he just wants a one night stand, but because he has turned cold and disinterested after you expressed that you weren't ready for a sexual relationship I think it's safe to say that a sexual relationship is what he is after.
... (read in full...)
Pain 'down there' after sex... why?
Q. After sex with my bf (long term, we've only been with each other - sexually anyways, so it cant be an STD) i always seem to be getting a 'burning' sensation down there. So much that he can't go back in again. So its more like we have sex, he ...
A. 4 April 2008: A yeast infection would never clear on it's own!!
But if lubrication is helping then it probably isn't a yeast infection causing the pain. Like annalisa said you need to work on your foreplay a little more, make sure that you are turned on enou... (read in full...)
I want sex without putting in the work like listening, talking, etc.....what do you think?
Q. I'm 21 years old, single and I know a couple of girls I could be dating right now. The thing is, I'm only looking for sex at this point of my life :D I'm not interested in spending time listening to her, hanging out, etc. All I want to do with ...
A. 1 April 2008: Relationships that are based on sex are not a good idea. With relationships come emotions and that's when your going to hurt someone. 'Bed buddies' rarely work for the same reason. You are designed to get emotionally attached to someone you are ... (read in full...)
Pain 'down there' after sex... why?
Q. After sex with my bf (long term, we've only been with each other - sexually anyways, so it cant be an STD) i always seem to be getting a 'burning' sensation down there. So much that he can't go back in again. So its more like we have sex, he ...
A. 1 April 2008: Here are a few suggestions to try before seeing the Dr, just to rule out some of the non medical stuff. If you are using condoms, change brands. Ask your pharmacist for advice. A lot of people are allergic to latex and that could be the problem. ... (read in full...)
She's selfish, immature, rarely has sex with me, doesn't trust me but I want to marry her?
Q. i've been with this girl for two years in may and when things are going good its the best feeling, but its not like that all the time. i'm 24 and she'll be 21 in july. i love her to death, we are very different, i'm from maui and shes from kansas. i ...
A. 1 April 2008: You say that you love her to death and then go on to list all of the bad qualities she has. I would suggest that you think with your head and ignore your heart for a little bit (because everyone knows that your heart is deaf dumb and blind when i... (read in full...)
I don't receive unique presents from my BF! How do I ask him about the duplicate order I have seen without appearing ungrateful or nosey?
Q. I don't know what to think about my boyfriend's actions. I have known him about 3 years now. When I first met him and we were getting to know each other I was telling him that an ex of mine had upset me because he used to buy his Mother similar ...
A. 1 April 2008: I think men and women view presents very differently. My husband always assumed that as long as everyone had something it didn't matter what it was - no thought ever went into them and people rarely got anything suitable. He thought of present ... (read in full...)
If your boyfriend always goes on about your cousin, what do I do because it is starting to p**s me off proper and I have been with him for 3 years and he hasn't done it ever before.
Q. If your boyfriend always goes on about your cousin, what do I do because it is starting to p**s me off proper and I have been with him for 3 years and he hasn't done it ever before....
A. 28 March 2008: You need to tell him that his talking about your cousin is really annoying you and ask him to stop. If he respects you he will do this.
You don't state if your cousin is male or female or the context that he goes on about them in, but I'm assu... (read in full...)
Even although my ex has told me to forget him, I can't!
Q. hi.. I am heartbroken here My guy and I are going on for quite long... we were going normal for long till one day he just stopped smsing me. I sent him so many messages but I didn't recieve any reply from him. I don't know whether we both have bro...
A. 28 March 2008: It sounds to me like you and your guy have broken up - but he doesn't want to have to say it. If he's not replying then you should stop messaging him. And try to avoid a situation where you have to talk to him in front of his friends otherwise it ... (read in full...)
Lesbian in Love triangle!
Q. Hey I could really do with some advice or any thoughts on the following: (sorry in advance about the length!) Ok I'm 21 and a lesbian I have been in a relationship with my gf since the end of september and for the first few months everythin...
A. 28 March 2008: It all sounds really complicated to me. Maybe you should use the 'break' from your girlfriend to try to work out what it is you want, without other people getting in the way.
It does not sound like you would have a simple relationship with Kate... (read in full...)
I have a tendency to give in to sex, what should I do?
Q. I know that it is wrong to have sex with someone that I just met so I am going to ask for anyones opinion on this. Ok I just met this dude at the club saturday and then we left to go chill in his car we didn't do anything. We've been talking for ...
A. 27 March 2008: I don't think that you need help as you don't seem like a sex addict. You're not deliberately setting out to have sex with people, or finding any excuse to do this, you didn't sleep with him the first date either.
The problem is that sex feels good... (read in full...)
I want to ask him if he likes me but I'm afraid it will make things awkward between us.
Q. I think we're in the friendship phase right now and that he doesn't have a crush on me. He is one year older than me and we're both in high school. He gave me a ride back to school and when I complained about his driving, he took both hands off the ...
A. 25 March 2008: I think he definately likes you. But may be worried that you don't like him. He's making excuses for him to touch you - ie your purse. ... (read in full...)
Virtual flirt... too much?
Q. I've been married for 15 years and am very happy with our life. Sex life not so much. Recently I found one of my first boyfriends online and started talking... really only wanted to see how he was doing. It turned into memory sharing and was very ...
A. 20 March 2008: I agree with waterloo sunset. Back away from your ex and concentrate on spicing up your sex life with your husband. ... (read in full...)
I don't understand how he can be disappointed since this all happened in my past, before I even started talking to him.
Q. heyy everyone=] I'm in a little bit of confusion and need some help. Okay so me and my boyfriend were talking on the phone last night and somehow we got into the subject about my past and what I've done. He's always called me "miss innocent" ...
A. 20 March 2008: I think a lot blokes react like that to your past. I'm not sure why but every boyfriend I've had has reacted badly to anything you've done before them.
I think they like the idea that they are the first, only and best and any hint that they aren... (read in full...)
After debating this for a while, I sat down at my desk this morning and wrote this to my probably soon to be ex. Can anyone advise if this is the right way to go?
Q. After debating this for a while, I sat down at my desk this morning and wrote this to my probably soon to be ex. Can anyone advise if this is the right way to go. I know email is not the way to go, but I'm tending to descend into floods of tears ...
A. 20 March 2008: I think that you should try to tell him face to face, even if you are crying. Saying what you want by e-mail doesn't always work as things can be misread as there are none of the extra communication factors available. It may read completely ... (read in full...)
It has been now 34 days and still no period.. I am so worried I am pregnant Help?
Q. HELP!!!! I took the morning after pill within 72 hours, a week later I got a really really light period that lasted a day and came earlier, it has been now 34 days and still no period.. I am so worried I am pregnant Help?...
A. 20 March 2008: The morning after pill messes around with your cycle for the first couple of months. I'm pretty sure that you are not pregnant, especially as you don't mention experiencing any of the symptoms of pregnancy; but the morning after pill is only 85% ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wrote me a threatening email! How do I respond?
Q. Boyfriend and I are arguing.He did somethign that hurt me and all day I waited for flowers and an apology or both. When I finally received an e-mail from him it was nasty and threatening. I don't know how to respond to that. I feel I should sh...
A. 20 March 2008: Honey get your stuff from his appartment and leave. You don't need to take that off of anyone. It sounds to me like he thinks that he can say and do whatever he likes, and if you dare to try to stop him (ie argue with him) this will be a regular ... (read in full...)
He's not the faithful type, should I go after him anyway?
Q. i have known *Guy* for about a year now, i've got on with him well since we first started talking. we've always flirted and joked around like that but over the last month or so hes got more serious about it, telling me he cant stop thinking of me ec...
A. 20 March 2008: I know I sound really harsh here, you've already had a relationship where you got hurt enough to stay away from men for a year and a half - why would you set yourself up to be hurt by another man?
He is already trying to cheat on his current grlf... (read in full...)
How do you know if your a lesbian/bisexual?
Q. ok, I have another lil' prob. How do you know if your a lesbian/bisexual? (I have a boyfriend and like him a lot) Like when I watch porn, I watch lesbian porn only! There have been a few occasions where I have looked at a girl and said "I'd like t...
A. 20 March 2008: Why label yourself? I hate the fact that everyone has to be straight, gay or bi. Just be yourself. You fancy who you fancy, and it sounds as if you like both.
But while you have a boyfriend stay faithful to him. Fantasise as much as you like, but ... (read in full...)
I want to ask him if he likes me but I'm afraid it will make things awkward between us.
Q. I think we're in the friendship phase right now and that he doesn't have a crush on me. He is one year older than me and we're both in high school. He gave me a ride back to school and when I complained about his driving, he took both hands off the ...
A. 20 March 2008: Definitely a good sign!! He seems to be giving you all the hints - but can't pluck up the courage to make his move (I had to make the first move with my husband else he would never have got around to it!!)... (read in full...)
Should I just accept that he will never be in love with me like that, or is this a sign that he's not really into me?
Q. I know some men are not that romantic but I've known my boyfriend for a number of years, and was around him and his former girlfriend a few times in social settings and I know he was very romantic with her (nuzzling her in public, holding hands, ...
A. 20 March 2008: I think that it may be something that he will never do with you. Do you think that you can live with that? It must be awful to be with someone that you feel doesn't love you. Have you explained to him that you don't feel that he loves you? Do you ... (read in full...)
She still likes her ex - can this work?
Q. me and my partner have only been together for about 2 months now. in the beginning everything was going on fine and then slowly i began to see a slight change to her.had a feeling it was to do with her ex through over hearing phone calls and also ...
A. 17 March 2008: From experience I would say move on. Until someone is over their ex they will not make a good partner, and you certainly will not be first on their mind in most circumstances. And you always seem to be compared (even if it's favourably it still ... (read in full...)
He lies about porn, can I trust him?
Q. I am currently with my bf of 6 months, we're living together already and although 6 months may not seem that long, it's like we've known each other for years. He was my first everything really and have given up allot to be with him properly. I am ...
A. 17 March 2008: Most men view porn differently to most women. They need more visual stimulation when they fantasize. It really doesn't mean that he wants to sleep with these women or thinks that they are better then you. He may have just lokked at it because he was ... (read in full...)
Should I just accept that he will never be in love with me like that, or is this a sign that he's not really into me?
Q. I know some men are not that romantic but I've known my boyfriend for a number of years, and was around him and his former girlfriend a few times in social settings and I know he was very romantic with her (nuzzling her in public, holding hands, ...
A. 17 March 2008: It seems really strange that he would be with you just for the sake of it. I mean you've known him for yesrs and you've been a couple for 3 years. Has he never been romantic/touchy feely or has it worn off over time?... (read in full...)
I want to ask him if he likes me but I'm afraid it will make things awkward between us.
Q. I think we're in the friendship phase right now and that he doesn't have a crush on me. He is one year older than me and we're both in high school. He gave me a ride back to school and when I complained about his driving, he took both hands off the ...
A. 17 March 2008: That's usually a good sign - from my experience anyway... (read in full...)
Obligation to disclose your relationship status?
Q. Dear Cupid, I am in a bit of a dilemma. I moved to a new town a couple of months. It's a beautiful old romantic town. I came here to start working at this company. I moved across an ocean to get here. I didn't have any intention of dating anyone...
A. 14 March 2008: Because it's an unspoken rule not everyone goes along with it - like the 'oh I thought you knew I was married' line. It just means that they knew they should have told you, but hoped that you wouldn't find out. Most people go along with this rule ... (read in full...)
How much weight could I lose between now and Easter?
Q. Similar question was asked earlier, but... I'm around 5' 5" and weigh 116. I really would like to lose weight by Easter, because I'm fat. I'm restricting my food again because I lost a lot of weight when I did this last summer and fall. Unfortunat...
A. 14 March 2008: Honey I do agree with the others here - you are not fat from the amount you say that you weigh. And running a minimum of one hour a day on a restricted diet is dangerous. If you are doing that much cardio exercise you need a high carbohydrate diet ... (read in full...)
Why am I nervous about having sex with an older guy?
Q. Have you ever been scared to have sex with someone who is alot older then you? Especially ten year diff. I cant figure out why im nervous to and im not a virgin but iv never had sex with someone who was older then me. Im 22. ...
A. 14 March 2008: Are you nervous because you think that because he is older he must have had more experienced women then you and won't think that you match up?? ... (read in full...)
Any tips on how to overcome my shyness?
Q. My ex bf broke up with me because his friends didnt like me. They thought I was weird because I am quiet/shy and dont drink. Whenever I would go out with him and his mates and I wouldnt say much, as soon as they would leave he would start yelling ...
A. 14 March 2008: Your ex was stupid. You can't help being shy and any decent person would explain to their friends that you are a little nervous around people you don't know well and expect their consideartion, not start abusing you after they leave.
Your new boyf... (read in full...)
I want to ask him if he likes me but I'm afraid it will make things awkward between us.
Q. I think we're in the friendship phase right now and that he doesn't have a crush on me. He is one year older than me and we're both in high school. He gave me a ride back to school and when I complained about his driving, he took both hands off the ...
A. 14 March 2008: I really do think you should tell him, the worst that can happen it that he will say no and you'll be a little embarrased, but he will no doubt be very flattered. It would be far worse if you waited around for ages and then had to listen to him ... (read in full...)
Will leaving a tampon in too long cause infertility?
Q. Hey I was just wondering is it true, that if you leave your tampon in for too long it can lessen the chances of being able to have kids?? (say over the recommended time of 4hours?) Thanks its been worrying me....
A. 12 March 2008: It can't make you infertile, but like the others say it can cause TSS. TSS can be fatal, and you usually don't realise you have it until it's too late as the symptoms are the same a the flu to start with. Make sure that you read carefully the ... (read in full...)
She's scared to have an orgasm--how do I deal with this?
Q. Dear Cupid, I've been going out with this girl for a few months. She's really great and I think we're falling in love. We are sexually active and we enjoy having sex with each other alot. I've been with several partners before as has she. It's be...
A. 12 March 2008: This 'excuse' is quite common. Some women find it really difficult to let go enough to have an orgasm. It's not the same for women as for you men there are a lot more factors to an orgasm then just physical feelings.
I doubt if its because ... (read in full...)
How do I get the old man I fell in love with back??
Q. Hi there, I would like some advice, I have been seeing this guy for a while, 18 months and it is long distance, thing is it used to be ace! and don't get me wrong but when we are together it is good!! fantastic! but when we are apart now, it's ...
A. 12 March 2008: It's so not anything you have done!! It sounds as if you have tried everything to keep your relationship on track, it's just that he's changing. Unfortunately you can't do anything to get him back if he wants to go. And you can't make up his mind ... (read in full...)
I want to ask him if he likes me but I'm afraid it will make things awkward between us.
Q. I think we're in the friendship phase right now and that he doesn't have a crush on me. He is one year older than me and we're both in high school. He gave me a ride back to school and when I complained about his driving, he took both hands off the ...
A. 12 March 2008: There is the chance that it would make your friendship a bit strained if he were to say that he isn't interested, although it sounds as if your friendship is strong enough to survive it. And it really does sound as if he is intersted - I would hate ... (read in full...)
Should I just accept that he will never be in love with me like that, or is this a sign that he's not really into me?
Q. I know some men are not that romantic but I've known my boyfriend for a number of years, and was around him and his former girlfriend a few times in social settings and I know he was very romantic with her (nuzzling her in public, holding hands, ...
A. 11 March 2008: It's hard to tell from this whether there is something more to him suddenly not being very romantic, do you know why he and his ex broke up? Did she critisize him for being like it? Or maybe he was so like this with his ex because he never felt ... (read in full...)
How do I get the old man I fell in love with back??
Q. Hi there, I would like some advice, I have been seeing this guy for a while, 18 months and it is long distance, thing is it used to be ace! and don't get me wrong but when we are together it is good!! fantastic! but when we are apart now, it's ...
A. 11 March 2008: I'm afraid the answer I'm going to give isn't one that you will like, I really think he has lost interest and is being a complete jerk in the hope that you will dump him so that he isn't the bad one.
If I were you I would try to braoden my frien... (read in full...)
I want to ask him if he likes me but I'm afraid it will make things awkward between us.
Q. I think we're in the friendship phase right now and that he doesn't have a crush on me. He is one year older than me and we're both in high school. He gave me a ride back to school and when I complained about his driving, he took both hands off the ...
A. 11 March 2008: It sounds like he likes you too, but is afraid of telling you for the same reason. If I were you I would go for the kiss next time you are in that position and see how he reacts. At least you'll know for sure. But I think it's a pretty good bet that ... (read in full...)
He is older then me and if anyone in my school finds out before I graduate he can get fired.
Q. I'm currently in a dilemma. I'm a college student about to graduate in a couple of weeks and I'm currently seeing this guy that works there. We aren't supposed to be together and he is seven years older then me. He has so many good qualities ...
A. 11 March 2008: Tell him that you really like him, but would rather wait a couple of weeks until you graduate to see him, in case he gets into trouble. It's only a couple of weeks, if you like each other then I'm sure you can both wait. And then you won't have to ... (read in full...)
I always get guys worked up about having sex. But when it comes down to having sex. I chicken out. Any tips?
Q. I always get guys worked up about having sex. But when it comes down to having sex. I chicken out. Any tips?...
A. 11 March 2008: Are you still a virgin? Or has something about sex scared you?
I think you need to be in a more committed relationship with someone and then you'll be less scared about taking the next step.
And please do stop teasing men - one day you may get ... (read in full...)
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