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Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal.
I heard this quote recently: ""The truth is like castor oil. It’s difficult to take and hard to swallow, so we get them to laugh and while their mouths are open, we pour a little in." -Harold Clurman
If you have an urgent question, please post it on the main page. Real life keeps me busy and has enough going on to keep me from being on here 24/7.... I hope yours does too! ;)
Current book recommendation: Untethered Soul, by Michael Singer. A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. The Power of Now, also by Eckhart Tolle. Really powerful stuff in there about not letting your runaway thoughts take over your life. Be present in the Now. You have what you need, right there, right inside yourself. Do yourself a HUGE favor and read these books. They may lead to an important and fundamental shift in your well-being. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." --Eckhart Tolle
All time fave relationship figure out book: A Fine Romance, Judith Sills, PhD. Buy if you are stuck and can't figure out why he won't commit, or why you keep picking guys who can't commit.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck." -The Dalai Lama
"Most people are doing the best they can, given what they know and understand. Including you. If they knew more and were aware of more, they would do things differently." -- Louise Hay
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain
I like these links right now: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4593/A-Simple-Way-to-Let-Go-of-Our-Negative-Patterns.html
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/04/04/25-life-lessons/
So here's the thing. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Weakness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Actually, according to Albert Einstein, that's the definition of insanity but I think that's a bit of a strong word choice.
“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” -The Dalai Lama.
The choices you make may affect others. Think about the consequences, intended or unintended, before you do something that you may have to explain later. Imagine you are standing in front of a group of people and have to defend what you chose to do.... if you can't manage to do it well, that's a fairly plain indicator it's a bad idea.
If everyone who loves you hates your partner, there might be a problem. If you only have your partner, there IS a problem.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8202/12-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship.html
If he’s mean to you now, he’s only going to get worse. Some people are energy vampires; they feed on the pain they inflict on others. They are broken. They will break you. Get out. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can fix him. You can’t.
You have my permission to say “no.”
If you are depressed, think of it like an illness. You have to treat it. Medicine can help. Talk to your doctor. If you’re drinking a lot, you’re already self-medicating. You might as well get some prescription-grade pharmaceuticals to help you get to a point where you can figure out why you’re self-medicating.
There’s a reason it’s called ‘junk food.’
Yoga is good for the body and the mind as well as soothing the spirit. Try it. Brisk walks are great too.
Don't eat crap. Canned sugary beverages or canned diet beverages are NOT good for you, they have no nutritional value and set you up for a lot of bad stuff. Don't drink them. Water is good. Decide if you can tolerate coffee or tea (I love them both) and then drink those in moderation.
Life is nasty, cold, brutal, unfair, and crappy. It’s also amazing, beautiful, uplifting, awe-inspiring and fun. You choose how you’re going to approach it every day.
I have a few soapboxes that I tend to haul out: I don't like to see people put their health or future at risk and I REALLY don't like to see them put other's health or future at risk. I feel strongly that not providing good sex education or keeping sex education from children is a form of child abuse. It's like sending them out into the world not knowing how to buckle a seatbelt.
I love this video from plannedparenthood.org (How Pregnancy Happens): http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
More good information from plannedparenthood.org on the various methods of birth control:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
I don't have any expertise in abusive relationships, but I do think there are some common sense basics that people who are in one might be missing. Find out more here: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal. |
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| Latest articles: Questions to ask before getting married!
No replies yet... 24 March 2016: I just read a great article in the New York Times online. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married” It was written by Eleanor Stanford and posted March 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com...
Need Christmas or other holiday gift ideas? Look here!
No replies yet... 3 December 2013: Every year, DearCupid sees an influx of questions asking "What should I get for my boyfriend/girlfriend/significant person? Help!" This question has been asked so many times, we suggest our posters use the search feature of the site here: ...
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Newest answer was posted
11 November 2011: A Primer on Women and Sex Look, we girls are funny. We don't sexually mature all overnight, our first sexual experiences are often painful, crappy and frankly unfulfilling on many levels. We don't know how to give blowjobs, most of us don't grow up ...
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26 January 2011: Each year, we here at DearCupid see many submissions asking, "What should I get my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/lover/partner for Valentine's Day?" I think it would be great to consolidate these questions and some ideas into one place, so I've ...
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1 May 2008: I posted this as an answer to a young man, a virgin, who wanted to know about his young girlfriend, also a virgin... First, I know it's hard to believe but a girl her age may not know her body very well. She may not know what is sexually stimula...
More than one way to get up the Duff!!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 March 2008: Some us ‘Aunts’ have been entertaining ourselves with fundamental questions about various ways pregnancy occurs…. I remembered that there were strange stories surrounding the births of some of the gods and goddesses of ancient myth, and I had a ...
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I wrote her a letter and I would like her decision. Or am I wasting my time with her?
Q. Hi, about four months ago, I asked a girl out and we ended up going on three dates; but after the third, she started acting a little weird by trying to zone me out. And then when I asked her why, she said she was sorry and didn't feel too comf...
A. 3 May 2012: She's made a decision, you just are so hopeful you can't see it. The decision is "no, I don't want to date you." Here are the tell-tale signs she's not interested: On your third date, she told you she didn't like the way you treated her She... (read in full...)
How can I stay away from the Friend Zone?
Q. I'm tired of being friend zoned by girls. The only time I wasn't friend zoned by a girl was when I was in my rebel years. Back then they were asking me left and right if I had a girlfriend. I was the guy that straight up ignored every girl in sight ...
A. 3 May 2012: I've enjoyed this blog's blunt assessment of 'nice guys.' http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/ng.shtml
Since we seem to be sharing articles.
Maybe this may help you look through the lenses of a woman who is fed up with that one breed of... (read in full...)
Husband putting oral sex above everything else.
Q. My husband and I have been married for 6 years, our sex life has always been great, but lately I feel that I am nothing more than a mouth for him. He wants oral sex everyday, and though I dont mind it, it seems that he has no emotions about it, no ...
A. 1 May 2012: "I am not your sexual vending machine. I do not like the way this situation makes me feel. I want to desire you and I want to be desired by you as more than a mouth. This isn't happening and my attempts to discuss it are dismissed by your anger and ... (read in full...)
Why isn't he excited anymore?
Q. I have been talking to this Spanish guy on Skype for six months now. We met on a random chat site but we video chated so I've seen him on camera. We always have good conversations, despite the language barrier. He always tells me how beautiful I am ...
A. 30 April 2012: You can ask him but don't get your expectations set an unrealistic level. You've had some nice chats and he's used romantic words but the reality is that you don't really know all that much about him. He may well have a girlfriend. He may have just ... (read in full...)
After 18 years of marriage my husband told me about wanting a divorce through a solicitor and wont speak to me at all! How do I get through this?
Q. After 18 years of marriage and just 2 days before my 40th birthday I get an email from a solicitor to say my husband wants a divorce while I was away. We have had a rocky marriage for several years and I had gone away on a holiday, to encompass my ...
A. 27 April 2012: Call your friends who may have great referrals for the shark. There are steps you need to take that are counterintuitive, I've learned, so make that your top priority.
Sorry he's pulled the rug out from under you like this but you have to move forw... (read in full...)
Any ideas for reducing swelling after kissing?
Q. Okay so I'm going to get to the point. Me and my boyfriend like to be a tad rough when we kiss, so it's to be expected for me to have clown lips within a few minutes of making out. Does anyone know anything to make the swelling go down? I would love ...
A. 27 April 2012: Tissue trauma is tissue trauma. The skin heals in its own time, there's no magic shortcut. Ice may reduce swelling but if you tear or bruise the skin, it has to go through a repair process. Broken capillaries leak blood onto the surrounding tissue. ... (read in full...)
After 18 years of marriage my husband told me about wanting a divorce through a solicitor and wont speak to me at all! How do I get through this?
Q. After 18 years of marriage and just 2 days before my 40th birthday I get an email from a solicitor to say my husband wants a divorce while I was away. We have had a rocky marriage for several years and I had gone away on a holiday, to encompass my ...
A. 27 April 2012: Hire a shark of an attorney, like, TODAY. He's way out ahead of you and you need help right now. Get the practical planing started and call friends for emotional support.
Lawyer, first. Then friends and family.... (read in full...)
Am I normal? I don't look like other women!
Q. hi there, i dont men to be crude or nasty but i have some questions the average human growth and development book wont answer. i been around various women while we change in the locker and i see them naked. i notice that 99% have a vagina that hides ...
A. 27 April 2012: My bad.... (read in full...)
Why did my father-in-law have no empathy when I revealed the extent of his son's infidelities?
Q. I was wondering if anyone could give me some insight or thoughts on the reaction of my in-laws (particularly father-in-law)when I revealed to them, when I was extremely upset, about the extent of their son's (my husband), cheating on me over a 6 ...
A. 27 April 2012: Family trumps in laws. That's what you experienced. FIL perceived you as complaining about his son and he defended him, in an aggressive way but that's what happened.
I'm sorry you had a lousy husband for so many years and an awful encounter with... (read in full...)
Why does she feel so bad after we have phone sex?
Q. Hello. My girlfriend and I have had a recurring problem now for half a year. We've been dating for about a year and we were sexually active the first few months. After some issues with her parents, we are now completely non-sexual. We occasionally ...
A. 27 April 2012: Maybe ask her why she continues to do something that makes her feel bad? Look, full disclosure here. I don't have any problem with people masturbating. I think it's normal and healthy, as long as it isn't taking over your life.
Your girlfriend is e... (read in full...)
Am I normal? I don't look like other women!
Q. hi there, i dont men to be crude or nasty but i have some questions the average human growth and development book wont answer. i been around various women while we change in the locker and i see them naked. i notice that 99% have a vagina that hides ...
A. 27 April 2012: You have a vagina and a clitoris? Check. You are normal! We come in all shapes and sizes and so do our genitalia. I have a link for you which may help.
h... (read in full...)
Leaving my best friend and my gamer life behind.....
Q. Ok here's the thing. I know this isn't your typical relationship question that you guys get but it's a serious one to me. I'm what most people would consider a 'Hardcore Gamer'. I use to be the guy playing video games for 20 hours a day. Video games ...
A. 27 April 2012: It sounds as though you are feeling your way into the light of day, literally, lol. I think you'll be fine. There's a lot of life out there to enjoy. One thing that may help you, set a timer every morning for 10 minutes. Then find a sturdy chair to ... (read in full...)
He's depressed and never responds to my emails or texts, and never answers the phone. How do I deal with my irritated feelings over this situation?
Q. My boyfriend recently 'went' back to the east coast where he's from, and there's no certainty if he will come back, or when. All of his stuff is still over here with me... but I can easily see him decide to stay over there and have all his stuf...
A. 27 April 2012: There's not much you can do, I see why you are frustrated, but if he's been hospitalized and has heart damage, he needs to be in good medical hands. Do you have any kind of contact at all with his family? So that you could have a conversation with ... (read in full...)
My wife with another man, reality is quite different from fantasy.
Q. Hello I am looking for some help. I had the fantasy of watching my wife having sex with someone else. I read about it, found that is not so unusual, so I talked to my wife about it. On first hand, she was extranged, since I am a very jelous man, but...
A. 27 April 2012: I'm not sure a 'regular guy' would encourage his wife to explore having sex with someone else.
I think therapy may help you deal with the impaired sexual functioning, as based on the story, this isn't really a physical issue. It's an emotional and ... (read in full...)
Why does she feel so bad after we have phone sex?
Q. Hello. My girlfriend and I have had a recurring problem now for half a year. We've been dating for about a year and we were sexually active the first few months. After some issues with her parents, we are now completely non-sexual. We occasionally ...
A. 26 April 2012: You're not completely non-sexual, you are masturbating over the phone together so you are being sexual with each other. I think that perhaps she is aware of that and the discordancy is what is causing her distress.
Aren't there those who prac... (read in full...)
My wife has changed, she's become so cold hearted and to make it worse I find out she's lied about her sexual past! Am I crazy or should I feel hurt?
Q. Please anyone give me advise ...I'm hurting more than I ever have in my life, so here's my story I'm 30 years old married 5 years and together 6 years. we have 3 kids two she had from a former marriage but the dad was a deadbeat, thug, gangster in ...
A. 26 April 2012: I'm not hearing any possibility of forgiveness in the followup. I think you should accept that the marriage is over and start changing your life to reflect that. Begin to reach a new normal.
Sorry that things didn't work out. Best wishes for the ... (read in full...)
Leaving my best friend and my gamer life behind.....
Q. Ok here's the thing. I know this isn't your typical relationship question that you guys get but it's a serious one to me. I'm what most people would consider a 'Hardcore Gamer'. I use to be the guy playing video games for 20 hours a day. Video games ...
A. 26 April 2012: I would be sad but realize that people do grow apart. It happens.
Be happy you made a friend and celebrate what you had together, recognizing that nothing is permanent in life.
You aren't wrong to mourn the change of the relationship. Embrace ... (read in full...)
He's depressed and never responds to my emails or texts, and never answers the phone. How do I deal with my irritated feelings over this situation?
Q. My boyfriend recently 'went' back to the east coast where he's from, and there's no certainty if he will come back, or when. All of his stuff is still over here with me... but I can easily see him decide to stay over there and have all his stuf...
A. 26 April 2012: Is he actively seeking treatment for his depression? It sounds like he is under medical care, if he was just discharged from the hospital, so is handling the depression part of his recovery? Or is this a self-diagnosed and untreated condition he's ... (read in full...)
Do priorities come into play when there's a large age gap?
Q. I'm wondering if age in dating makes a big difference. Recently I met this guy and hes a bit older than me. I just turned 21 and hes 34. We hit it off pretty well and we have the same views on a lot of things. I'm just wondering if it'd be a problem ...
A. 26 April 2012: K c, I love ya girl, but being 50+ doesn't automatically consign you to the 'aged and decrepit' category! :D
I know 20 and 30 somethings who are in terrible shape and 50 and 60 and even 70 somethings who are active, vital and capable. It's all abou... (read in full...)
Is this just a gift or does it mean more?
Q. My ex and I broke up when I was 14 wks pregnant. His choice not mine . Through my whole pregnancy he was less than Kind. As advised by an attorney I kept him up to date on dr appointments and allowed him to be at the birth. We were together...
A. 26 April 2012: If that's all that's he's given you and there's nothing else in his behavior or demeanor, I would assume it's just a token gesture. Perhaps out of guilt?
Why can't you ask him? "John, I'm a bit confused by the gift of the expensive necklace. I appr... (read in full...)
My wife with another man, reality is quite different from fantasy.
Q. Hello I am looking for some help. I had the fantasy of watching my wife having sex with someone else. I read about it, found that is not so unusual, so I talked to my wife about it. On first hand, she was extranged, since I am a very jelous man, but...
A. 26 April 2012: So basically, your fantasy of seeing your wife with another man has evolved into her wanting to be with the other man, and she's told you that you are not sexually compatible? Wow.
I guess the only option is to see a marriage counselor and perh... (read in full...)
He was watching porn when I was asleep next to him!
Q. Hey! Last night I fell asleep next to my fiancé while he was watching a movie on his computer. He left the computer on and this morning I saw that he'd been looking at porn while I was asleep next to him. I didn't say anything, but then over ...
A. 26 April 2012: I don't think it's controlling to be honest with him. "Babe, remember when we talked about porn? You said you used to watch it when single, but that you didn't any more. So that seems to have changed, and you're watching it again. I noticed you had ... (read in full...)
I thought he liked me too, why is he pulling away?
Q. I'm 24 and currently living abroad. I'm currently seeing a guy that is also residing in the same country. We are both leaving in 3 months. However, we've began to get to know each other and gone on a few dates for the past couple of months. I met ...
A. 26 April 2012: One additional piece of advice. Don't get sexual with a guy until you know what you are getting into. Letting things just happen without an understanding of what it means doesn't sound like a good idea for you, as you feel 'used' if he up and leaves ... (read in full...)
We like each other a lot but our 8 year age gap and him being a divorcee are causing problems with my parents. Should I break up with him?
Q. I am 28 years old and I have a boyfriend who is 8 years older than me. I have told my parents, and being the judgmental types that they are, they think he is too old for me. They also said he is probably taking advantage of me because I am a lot ...
A. 26 April 2012: If you know your parents are judgmental, why are you allowing their opinions to influence your choices? Do you lack judgment of your own and rely on others to decide for you?
You are 28, not 16 or 18, you're not a youngster with no experience in t... (read in full...)
I thought he liked me too, why is he pulling away?
Q. I'm 24 and currently living abroad. I'm currently seeing a guy that is also residing in the same country. We are both leaving in 3 months. However, we've began to get to know each other and gone on a few dates for the past couple of months. I met ...
A. 26 April 2012: We have no way of knowing what's going on inside his head. We can speculate, such as: he's afraid of creating an expectation that you two are an official couple. He has a girlfriend elsewhere and doesn't want to tell you. He's not as into you as you ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend drunk texting/sexting a girl he slept with. Need advice!
Q. My boyfriend keeps texting a girl that he slept with way before we started dating, but he only texts her when he is drunk. Sometimes it's sexting and then just being friendly. It really bothers me, because of things that his mates tell me about her ...
A. 26 April 2012: They've got quite the 'lad' thing going on, don't they? Sleeping around and then saying SHE'S the slut? Who did she sleep with, their avatars or cloned twins? Sounds to me like they are just as slutty.
And then toying with you by laughing at your... (read in full...)
Viagra won't work without desire...any ideas for increasing my libido?
Q. What could be a cause of that I dont care about sex anymore at all? I used to be very horny, and now, I dont even care for porn or any sexual contact with my wife? What could cause such a big change in me? I know,I'm asking, I should know better. ...
A. 26 April 2012: Have your doctor check your hormone levels. Talk about any medication you may be taking. How's your nutrition and fitness level? Is your waist larger than it should be? Do you smoke?
Go get a thorough medical work up. First, you rule out any phys... (read in full...)
He was watching porn when I was asleep next to him!
Q. Hey! Last night I fell asleep next to my fiancé while he was watching a movie on his computer. He left the computer on and this morning I saw that he'd been looking at porn while I was asleep next to him. I didn't say anything, but then over ...
A. 26 April 2012: Why are you withholding your feelings and your knowledge from him? You are playing games as well.
When he said what he said this morning, why didn't you simply say, "I know you did watch porn."?
I think it's time to have a discussion about yo... (read in full...)
How do I approach my man's hygiene issues tactfully?
Q. This is so embarrassing, but I need to find a really tactful way and the right words as to not embarrass my man. His toilet hygeine is horrible!!! There are constantly "skid marks" and not faint mind you, as if he didn't wipe like a kid skid ...
A. 26 April 2012: Or be nicely honest. "Babe, I don't want to be nasty but I am a bit freaked out at how much staining you have going on in your shorts. I've ignored the problem for a while but you have to do a better job of cleaning yourself. I've put in some wipes ... (read in full...)
How do I approach my man's hygiene issues tactfully?
Q. This is so embarrassing, but I need to find a really tactful way and the right words as to not embarrass my man. His toilet hygeine is horrible!!! There are constantly "skid marks" and not faint mind you, as if he didn't wipe like a kid skid ...
A. 26 April 2012: Leave a line of his soiled shorts with the 'tracks' front and center and a large bottle of stain remover next to them on the tub edge, so that he can't fail to see them when he goes in to use the toilet. Earlier in the day, you will tell him that ... (read in full...)
He cheated and had a baby with another girl, we broke up because of this but he still thinks he can get me back! How do I tell him he has no chance?
Q. This guy and I were together for almost a year from 2010-2011. While we were together I thought everything was fine until 2011 came and he told me he had a baby. After finding that out, I ended it with him because the baby was a newborn meaning that ...
A. 26 April 2012: What else can you tell him? Seriously, he's such a stalker that he won't go away?
Tell him you will call the police if he tries to stalk you again and do so if needed. Block him, on the phone, on the internet, on any device he could try to reac... (read in full...)
Its hard to Trust when Temptation is always present along with opportunity.
Q. I am a man that can admit that I have such a hard time trusting women. I am afraid of being lied to, cheated on, and used for my gentlemanly, respectful, and generous ways. I have a woman (fiance)that is very beautiful and she is has a large set ...
A. 26 April 2012: If she's had a large chest for a long time, she's had plenty of time to get used to stupid unwanted comments. If she says she can handle the comments, I'm sure she can.
Show her respect by trusting her judgement. If you can't handle her choice of a... (read in full...)
Him and His new "girlfriend" like to taunt me
Q. A guy that I dated for years all of a sudden didn't want to see me anymore. It had always been kind of casual but we had always been really close friends, for over 10 years. When he said he no longer wanted to see me, he said that he just didn't f...
A. 26 April 2012: A friend of mine had some weird stalker and so he had to become invisible on Facebook. There are setting that keep your name, your photos, your wall and everything else off any search engine. First, block him and her and anyone who you know is his ... (read in full...)
I think he needs to accept that he did something while drunk, how do I discuss it with him?
Q. I kinda had a small bump with my boyfriend. We did not see each other this weekend which is fine I made this choice, but I called him last night to talk to him for a bit before I went to bed and he was drunk. He was playing a world wide online video ...
A. 25 April 2012: Hey, based on your other posts, specifically this one: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-boyfriend-does-really-crazy-things-to-be.html I'd say your boyfriend has a pattern of binge drinking. Now, if he won't acknowledge that there is a problem, ... (read in full...)
My husband is a control freak and abusive but I love him!
Q. I have been married for two years now. My husband is a very controlling man and extremely domineering. He becomes jelous or angry at me for the most absurd reasons such as me hanging the clothes out to dry when his brother is in the backyard. (his ...
A. 25 April 2012: He's this way because he's never grown up and has the emotional maturity and balance of a two year old, only with a mean streak. I expect his father treated his mother terribly and he thinks it is normal. It is not.
Be thankful you are with you... (read in full...)
My wife has changed, she's become so cold hearted and to make it worse I find out she's lied about her sexual past! Am I crazy or should I feel hurt?
Q. Please anyone give me advise ...I'm hurting more than I ever have in my life, so here's my story I'm 30 years old married 5 years and together 6 years. we have 3 kids two she had from a former marriage but the dad was a deadbeat, thug, gangster in ...
A. 25 April 2012: So I think Yos has given you the advice someone in your position can use to move forward. It's not nice and it's not comfortable and it's not something anyone 'deserves' but you are in the situation and you either make the decision to try to deal ... (read in full...)
My wife has changed, she's become so cold hearted and to make it worse I find out she's lied about her sexual past! Am I crazy or should I feel hurt?
Q. Please anyone give me advise ...I'm hurting more than I ever have in my life, so here's my story I'm 30 years old married 5 years and together 6 years. we have 3 kids two she had from a former marriage but the dad was a deadbeat, thug, gangster in ...
A. 25 April 2012: Please answer Yos's question. Do you want to save the marriage or not? Quickly, yes or no.... (read in full...)
Would you date someone who has done porn?
Q. I am going to do a photo shoot in a few weeks...a photo shoot for a pornographic magazine and website. My closest friends, the only ones who know about it, have said that it may affect future relationships that I have. But is that really true? ...
A. 25 April 2012: Ah, so the question you posed was to ask people generally if they would date someone who did porn?
So what have you learned? That people have differing ideas and some will date a porn model and some won't. Is that surprising to you?... (read in full...)
Would you date someone who has done porn?
Q. I am going to do a photo shoot in a few weeks...a photo shoot for a pornographic magazine and website. My closest friends, the only ones who know about it, have said that it may affect future relationships that I have. But is that really true? ...
A. 24 April 2012: As for being broke, well, let me tell you that I spent a lot of weeks eating cheap nasty hotdogs with coleslaw because that was all I could afford. Passed up a lot of evenings out with friends because I couldn't buy anything and wore a lot of old ... (read in full...)
Would you date someone who has done porn?
Q. I am going to do a photo shoot in a few weeks...a photo shoot for a pornographic magazine and website. My closest friends, the only ones who know about it, have said that it may affect future relationships that I have. But is that really true? ...
A. 24 April 2012: Where would you like to be?
And how much will that $2500 be after taxes? It'll be a lot less. That may also show up on future credit reports or background checks for different jobs.
I'm not hearing that you've actually thought this all the way ... (read in full...)
Would you date someone who has done porn?
Q. I am going to do a photo shoot in a few weeks...a photo shoot for a pornographic magazine and website. My closest friends, the only ones who know about it, have said that it may affect future relationships that I have. But is that really true? ...
A. 24 April 2012: It's not so much the perceived promiscuity as the reasons people imagine lie behind the decision to do porn. That's what niggles at people. Why would a lovely young woman decide to do porn? There's something that happened to her that has led her to ... (read in full...)
Would you date someone who has done porn?
Q. I am going to do a photo shoot in a few weeks...a photo shoot for a pornographic magazine and website. My closest friends, the only ones who know about it, have said that it may affect future relationships that I have. But is that really true? ...
A. 24 April 2012: Here are the things that occur to me when I hear someone is choosing to do porn:
She's been abused
She had an absent or abusive or distant father
She started having sex too young
She's confused about what kind of male attention is desirable
Sh... (read in full...)
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