My boyfriend's mother won't let go
Q. Sorry that this is pretty long! Hope this doesn’t sound selfish, but she’s driving me crazy! I kind of feel like this may be too soon to address this issue in the relationship, since we have only been dating for a short while (9 more days until ...
A. 20 December 2014: Read this book: "When He's Married to Mom" - Kenneth M Adams. I was in your situation with my husband. I picked up that there was something wrong on our first date, when I met him, but I really liked him. His mother was way too attached and dep... (read in full...)
Why are there times when I'm not attracted to him?
Q. Why do I go through phases of finding him very attractive, and then not so much so? I love my boyfriend, and generally speaking he is a good looking guy. I find myself wildly attracted to him sometimes...and then other times...not really. I know i...
A. 26 February 2014: This is most likely related to your hormone cycle. Do yourself a favor and look into the research done on how the reproductive cycle affects female attraction towards males. We find different types of males attractive at different points during the ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's mom wants him all to herself
Q. My boyfriend is a 38 year old never married bachelor. His mother is a fairly recent widow (of a year and a half,) and his sister is going through a divorce so she is a very recent single mom. They both seem to expect him to not only fulfill the male...
A. 22 January 2014: Please do yourself a favor and read the book 'When He's Married to Mom: How to Help Mother-Enmeshed Men Open their Hearts to True Love and Commitment' by Dr. Kenneth Adams. It covers what happens when men grow up with an unhealthy attachment to ... (read in full...)
I don't feel like I'm loved by my boyfriend and he always puts his mom first!
Q. My boyfriend and I have more issues than I can count. We are in our late 20s, been together 3+ yrs, and live together. Issue #1, he is a mamas boy. Whatever mom wants, he does. He goes above and beyond son duties. He gives her just as much, if not ...
A. 10 October 2013: Hi, please do yourself and read the book When He's Married to Mom by Adams & Morgan. The book deals with helping (or knowing when to let go of) a 'mother-enmeshed man' and goes into the different types of mother-enmeshed men; one chapter describes ... (read in full...)
My boyfriends mother won't let her son live. Isn't there a point when a parent has to let go?
Q. My boyfriends mother won't let her son live. She calls us when she's out of town (which is on the weekends)about every hour (up until 4 am!) asking if we are partying, or out drinking. We're both of age, so it shouldn't matter. We don't drink and ...
A. 6 September 2013: Sounds like you may have what's called a mother-enmeshed man (MEM) on your hands. If he cannot set AND enforce boundaries with his mother, you've got a BIG problem! Do yourself a favor and read: 'When He's Married to Mom' - Adams & Morgan. There's a ... (read in full...)
Facing a separation and divorce, after just one year of marriage! Help, please!
Q. This is probably the most I have needed advice of any question I've asked on here. I am facing a separation and ultimately divorce. I'm having a lot of mixed emotions and its been a roller coaster but I'll give the background in as short a story as ...
A. 17 July 2013: I know this is going to sound weird, but have you tried walking over, putting your arms around him, and just holding him?.
Your problems don't actually sound unfixable; it sounds more like you guys are not feeling warmth from the other and are ... (read in full...)
If your partner has an emergency and you share a lease, would you charge them for rent?
Q. My live in boyfriend and me got an apartment in march I paid the first month and him the deposit, a month into the lease I had to leave town because of a medical emergency where my sister's heart condition became worse and she needed surgery. Since ...
A. 11 July 2013: OP, in response to your response: It sounds to me like you are the one who's "nickel and diming" your boyfriend. You keep referring to these contributions you've made by buying things for the apartment, but we have no idea what contributions yo... (read in full...)
If your partner has an emergency and you share a lease, would you charge them for rent?
Q. My live in boyfriend and me got an apartment in march I paid the first month and him the deposit, a month into the lease I had to leave town because of a medical emergency where my sister's heart condition became worse and she needed surgery. Since ...
A. 11 July 2013: I have to say I agree with your boyfriend. It doesn't matter that you weren't physically in the apartment for three months; you entered into an agreement with your boyfriend that you would be sharing a residence and the costs of it. It sounds like ... (read in full...)
Was he tired, confused, emotional for some reason. or just forgetful when he use the name of his ex, (instead of my name), when he spoke to me?
Q. The other day my boyfriend called me by his ex's name. He was making me laugh because I had been previously upset with a family member. All of a sudden while he was telling me a joke he used her name instead of mine. He was with her for three ye...
A. 26 February 2013: I don't think you have anything to worry about and you should just put this behind you. Your boyfriend was with his ex for 3 whole years, and that's a long time of saying somebody's name. When he said his ex's name he was probably rushing to get a ... (read in full...)
Anyone have experience with an IUD?
Q. Hey guys. I have a health concern but I'm not looking for medical advice per se, more whether others think it sounds serious or not. I have to tell this to someone because I don't have anyone else, and I'm scared :( I'm 20, and got a copper IUD...
A. 4 February 2013: Hi, I think you have nothing to worry about, but I'm not a doctor. I've had the non-hormonal copper IUD in since November 2010 (I am 26, no children) and since then I have experienced some spotting and cramping outside of my period. I notice ... (read in full...)
The thought of an employee knowing my dark secret is making me ill!
Q. Hello, I really don’t know who or where to turn to for advice- but I am extremely upset to the point where I feel like I cannot move on. First, I will let you know that I have been questioning my sexuality for a few years- and currently I feel...
A. 21 October 2012: First of all, is this your computer for your work-place, at times hooked up to your work-place's network? If so, you shouldn't have pornography or anything like that on your computer. I don't know how it is since it's your father's company (maybe h... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has pics of hot girls at his job. Why? I feel bad and unsexy.
Q. Guys, please fill me in on this subject? I pulled up at my boyfriend's job yesterday ( I needed service on my car ) He is a mechanic. On his toolbox, I noticed a couple of posters of hot girls with barely any clothes on and a swimsuit calende...
A. 11 October 2012: I don't think you should judge him for this since this is at his work place. Maybe your boyfriend's a more private individual than you'd think and doesn't want to display you and his private life with you at work. I've been in a wonderful rela... (read in full...)
Is a tan a turn on? Guys and girls, your thoughts on whether tan lines are a turn off?
Q. I personally think it's a bit shallow for one to complain about tan lines on their partner, but that being said, I'm one who loves to soak up the sun in summer and obviously when I'm by the pool or at the beach with my friends, I'm not going to be ...
A. 28 October 2011: Ack, I know you don't want to hear a lecture, but for your skin's sake start avoiding tans and tan lines altogether! I am only 25 but would not be caught dead with a tan or in the sun without protection. It's just too damaging to your skin. I am in ... (read in full...)
He said if I ever fell pregnant he would leave me if I didn't get an abortion.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year, we plan to have a future together, have even spoken about marriage and kids, but kids would be at least 10 years away. (I know sometimes relatioships don't work out, but we do have a good ...
A. 20 October 2011: I think your boyfriend IS being mature. Not only is he agreeing to use two forms of contraception, he's asking you right off the bat to make a plan in the event of a pregnancy. Your boyfriend knows that at his age he does not have the instinct or ... (read in full...)
How to tell him I am falling in love?
Q. what is the best way to tell a guy im falling in love with him??????...
A. 18 October 2011: Send him letters of escalating romantic intensity, then key "I Love You" across his car. ... (read in full...)
Why won't my LDR boyfriend see me?
Q. My bf and I are long distance and have been for a long time. We don't get to see each other often, generally once every month or two. But lately it feels like he's trying to avoid seeing me. I'll admit that he does the work in visiting, he's u...
A. 15 October 2011: Why can't you ever go to visit him?... (read in full...)
He wasn't like this at the start. He rebuffs me sexually. Should I act cool in the morning even though his refusal upsets me?
Q. my boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 months now, and i seriously believe whole heartedly that we are meant to be together we are two of a kind, and we have fallen for each other so quickly. He treats me absolutely amazingly and always puts me ...
A. 15 October 2011: Just a thought, but since you say both of his rebuffs occurred just after you'd woken up, had you both made a trip to the bathroom to relieve yourselves and freshen up first? In the beginning of my 3 year relationship I didn't care when we did... (read in full...)
Should I be worried? Her reasons are my snoring? my sadness is no intimacy. My wife and I haven't shared a bed in six years.
Q. My wife and I sleep in separate bedrooms. We have been married for 19 years and this started about 6 years ago. Before that time, we always spent the night together. In fact, I can remember once when my wife was away at her mom's in another ...
A. 15 October 2011: The lack of sexual intimacy and not sleeping together are two separate issues. The latter is very normal. More and more houses are being built with two master bedrooms as married couples realize they get better sleep sleeping in their own room... (read in full...)
Burning "down there"- Help!
Q. Hiya, i've just started university a few weeks ago and during freshers week I had a one night stand (actually it happened twice) and the condom split. Now i'm on the pill anyway, so that aspect is ok, but since then i've had a burning down below. ...
A. 8 October 2011: It can still be a yeast infection even if you see no discharge. Burning, swelling and a white fluid are symptoms of a yeast infection (among other things).
Why don't you set up a doctor's appointment and in the meantime start treating for a ye... (read in full...)
Girlfriend uses emotional blackmail and I'm not sure how to deal with it anymore
Q. We’ve been dating for about 15 months. I am 27. My gf is 26. We attended my friends’ wedding. I know both the groom and bride. My gf came along as my guest, but she didn’t know neither of them. The wedding was ending since other guests were ...
A. 4 October 2011: While I agree with you, CindyCares, 99% of the time, I gotta disagree on the cold person being in the right. If you're cold it is much easier to warm up immediately; you can jump up and down, tap your feet, tense your muscles, grab a blanket, put on ... (read in full...)
If men want their women to look like porn stars, why don't us women care that our men don't look like porn stars??
Q. I'm 25, and I'm here to discuss pornography and men. Some but not all men complain their women don't look like porn stars/models etc. but how come women don't do the opposite and ask for 6-packs/chiselled bodies / big penises etc? Or if they do,...
A. 30 September 2011: Come on, we women put way, way, way more pressure on each other to look good than men do. Go to any checkout line of any grocery store and look at all the magazines with slender, sexy, airbrushed women on the covers. Cosmopolitan, Seventeen, Elle, ... (read in full...)
She saved herself for marriage, but we went too far! She's been crying for days!
Q. I was an arse. I've been with this woman for a year and she has been saving herself for marriage. Last week, she asked me to let her experience only a bit of myself and I impulsively took her. She hasn't stopped crying for days. She says she lov...
A. 29 September 2011: "I did not ejaculate inside her. I had given her oral sex and she asked me to only slip it in a small few inches so she would know half of how I felt in her. Once I slipped in too deep. I lost control for that one moment. I pulled out right away. ... (read in full...)
I just want to write, but my parents just want me to be rich.
Q. I need some advice You see, I'm an artist at heart right? basically a writer. I go to a highly respected creative arts school to study creative writing. Its like college course stuff for high school students. I'm in my first year and I'll...
A. 24 September 2011: I'm sorry, but your dad's just being realistic. You love being creative, writing, expressing yourself through art? Fancy that. Most of us love to be creative too, and would love even more to do it for a living. In fact, that's what many (far too ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend proposed...but went looking for a second-hand ring!
Q. So my boyfriend proposed to me the other day. All was going well until he started searching for an engagement ring. We were talking on the phone and he said "Here's one I think you'll like" and sent me a picture of the ugliest ring I'd ever seen. ...
A. 21 September 2011: Is the ring really so important? My parents have been happily married for 38 years: no ring. My boyfriend's parents have been happily married for 35 years: no ring. Same with my brother's girlfriend's parents: happily married until the father... (read in full...)
At night, my girlfriend scares me over the phone by talking about ghosts, how should I cope with it?
Q. I am in SDR with girl who lives in the same city between we have distance of 15 KMs between us. It’s been almost two years since we together. We meet over the weekend and keep it going through phone . For the last two weeks, my girlfriend has p...
A. 20 September 2011: This has got to be the most adorable post I've ever read here. OP, your girlfriend probably likes to scare you because she finds your reaction cute! ... (read in full...)
Broke off our engagement ...did I do the right thing?
Q. Just found out that my bf of four years didn't marry his ex gf because her divorce hadn't come through. He claims this is not the case and it was because they weren't the right match but turns out she was separated from her ex but still married to ...
A. 20 September 2011: "I figure that if her divorce HAD gone through, he would have married her and I wouldn't be in the picture, so therefore I'm not really the one he wanted anyway."
It sounds an awful lot like you want to punish your boyfriend for not anticipa... (read in full...)
Am I cheater? Is this really that bad? I need help
Q. I was in a relationship with the girl of my dreams! She was seriously the most amazing person on this planet and we had so much fun together. I Miss her so much. I would kill for her and die for her in a second. She means the world to me. I wanted ...
A. 19 September 2011: You say "I didn't cheat on her" and "I didn't touch this girl" but there is an important difference between men and women that you have to understand. In general, men are more concerned with their woman cheating on them sexually and women are more ... (read in full...)
Should I have a baby with this married man?
Q. I have a serious question that I know will ruffle A LOT of feathers but I'm sorry, I really need advice, I've been seeing a married man for a while and were very close, best friends more than lovers. Recently I have been getting urges to have a ...
A. 18 September 2011: I totally agree with maverick494. Sadly, it does not sound like you have your potential child's welfare or best interests in mind at all. Would you really want your child to be the product of such a scandal, to grow up reminded of it every day, as ... (read in full...)
How do I stop feeling a tiny bit betrayed about LDR boyfriend's actions?
Q. Yesterday evening, my LDR boyfriend from on the Continent met up with one of his female friends for a bite to eat and a couple of drinks. For a laugh, they decided to sneak into the place where he works since they weren't too far away and he has a ...
A. 15 September 2011: Well, that night sounds like something out of an 80s romantic comedy starring Molly Ringwald. I know where your thoughts are headed and I'd be jealous too, even if your boyfriend's friendship with this girl is strictly platonic. It's hard for me to ... (read in full...)
Am I REALLY going to regret not going to prom when this is my senior year?
Q. My question is, am I REALLY going to regret not going to prom when this is my senior year? I mean, the guy I like is taking college classes so he's never at school and I was hoping to become closer friends with him and possibly have him as a date ...
A. 14 September 2011: I didn't go to my prom OR my high school graduation, despite everyone telling me I would regret it. I chose to miss prom because I didn't like dancing and by the time I reached senior year (really, much earlier) I was just so bored of the kids in my ... (read in full...)
Husband said he was joking when he said he wanted me to get pregnant. Now I'm pregnant and he doesn't want the baby!
Q. I am pregnant, my brand new husband (9.9.2011)doesn't want me to keep the child. We both have children from previous relationships. When I wasn't pregnant he was constantly telling me that he wanted me to have his son (I have all daughters) and ...
A. 13 September 2011: You guys don't sound like you're married. A married couple is supposed to be a team. You don't just announce to your husband that you're pregnant and keeping it, or not keeping it; you decide together. What to do in the event of a pregnancy is ... (read in full...)
Are short men allowed to be good looking or do women find them unattractive because of their height?
Q. I stand 5'4 barefoot, I weigh 180lbs and I still have the washboard abs approaching the 30 plateau. The problem is my face. Friends and strangers alike tell me I'm very handsome. Enough to consider modeling but a huge dose of reality hit me when ...
A. 10 September 2011: Everybody likes something different. I'm 5'6", 24 years old, and for whatever reason I have never, ever been attracted to tall guys. You sound more than fine to me!
But I cannot abide small hands on a man, they're just creepy. :(... (read in full...)
After being on birth control, sex stings!
Q. I've been on Logynon birth control pills for a month now, and sex seems to be really painful - stingy, almost as if my BFs penis doesn't fit anymore (I've never had this problem until I started the pill) Has anyone else had an experience like ...
A. 12 August 2011: Hormonal birth control pills work to decrease the amount of free testosterone in your body in two ways. This can lead to decreased sex drive and decreased ability to lubricate naturally during sex, which would cause dry and stinging intercourse, as ... (read in full...)
Is it me or to women get over with child support?
Q. Im not sure why/when child support payments got so high. I understand your child gets 20% of you money but that still seems like a lot. When I was growing up my father had 4 kids and had to pay my mom 200 a month ( he hardly even payed that). My mom ...
A. 27 July 2011: I agree with you. I think men get a really raw deal when it comes to divorce and child support in this country and I cringe when I hear these stories. ... (read in full...)
Do I tell my guy friend that his girlfriend is a complete tramp and people are laughing at him behind his back because he is dating her?
Q. I have a male friend who has been dating this woman for about the last 6 months seriously. He and I had a past, but now we really are just friends and it is cool. He has always been hesitant about relationships since he was burned by who he thought ...
A. 26 July 2011: Stay out of it! Maybe these rumors are fake or being blown out of proportion. Maybe your friend knows his girlfriend better than you think he does. Maybe your friend understands that women can have multiple sex partners, just like men can. Maybe ... (read in full...)
Is getting a nose job a good idea?
Q. I know this is a relationship website, but i really really need some advice as to what to do and how to deal with what people will think. I know i shouldn't care about others opinions but i really can't help it!! Basically, since i was about 11 i...
A. 26 July 2011: First, my disclaimer: I generally disagree with plastic surgery unless it's reconstructive or has a health benefit. Also if, let's say, one is born with a cosmetic deformity that puts them at risk of developing serious psychosocial issues, I can ... (read in full...)
Any ideas on what tricks I can do, to teach my new puppy?
Q. I am getting me a Boston Terrier it is a female what kind of things can you teach a puppy? I have had cats so i am not use to having a puppy of my own. so i need some ideas on what to teach my puppy. so if you know of any ideas please let me know ...
A. 26 July 2011: All good advice from TasteofIndia. I Schutzhund trained my shepherd so I have lots of advice I could give, but I'd say something important to do with young puppies, specifically, is to get them used to being touched everywhere. When my shepherd was ... (read in full...)
Ladies: Any consequences of using whipped cream down there during foreplay??
Q. ok this is a really, really freaky and albeit personal question, well me and my girlfriend want to spice up our love life, by adding sexual foods to our love life, the question I want to ask is well the food we want to add is whipped cream, from the ...
A. 23 July 2011: You're really going to have to look into this one. The sugars from the milk in the whipped cream can cause a yeast infection. I'm not sure about a non-dairy whipped cream but the rule is if it has sugars in it, you can't use it.... (read in full...)
Any suggestions on how to lose weight? 100lbs seems so overwhelming!
Q. Hi all. This is more a self-esteem/relationship with myself kinda deal. I'm currently 220 lbs and at only 5'4", I'm a big girl. It sucks and I hate it. I was actually one of those girls you called anorexic back in elementary school because I was so ...
A. 22 July 2011: WHATEVER you do to lose this weight, make sure you start taking supplements like iron (ferrous sulfate) and biotin, and, yes, Rogaine, as SOON as you start. With that much weight to lose it is highly probable that your body will react to the stress ... (read in full...)
I think he discussed me not giving him a blowjob with his friend, does this mean he was just using me?
Q. Im a sixteen year old girl, and hes a few months younger than me. But he goes on like hes a lot older because of the company he keeps. And i know all his best friends as theyre my friends also. I was kinda with this guy for a few months, but we ...
A. 22 July 2011: I think you need to keep better company. Ditch the whole lot of them.... (read in full...)
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