Like what
she writes?
... Add *isha-1 to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *isha-1 a private message | | | *isha-1's profile:Hi there!
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal.
I heard this quote recently: ""The truth is like castor oil. It’s difficult to take and hard to swallow, so we get them to laugh and while their mouths are open, we pour a little in." -Harold Clurman
If you have an urgent question, please post it on the main page. Real life keeps me busy and has enough going on to keep me from being on here 24/7.... I hope yours does too! ;)
Current book recommendation: Untethered Soul, by Michael Singer. A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. The Power of Now, also by Eckhart Tolle. Really powerful stuff in there about not letting your runaway thoughts take over your life. Be present in the Now. You have what you need, right there, right inside yourself. Do yourself a HUGE favor and read these books. They may lead to an important and fundamental shift in your well-being. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." --Eckhart Tolle
All time fave relationship figure out book: A Fine Romance, Judith Sills, PhD. Buy if you are stuck and can't figure out why he won't commit, or why you keep picking guys who can't commit.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck." -The Dalai Lama
"Most people are doing the best they can, given what they know and understand. Including you. If they knew more and were aware of more, they would do things differently." -- Louise Hay
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain
I like these links right now: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4593/A-Simple-Way-to-Let-Go-of-Our-Negative-Patterns.html
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/04/04/25-life-lessons/
So here's the thing. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Weakness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Actually, according to Albert Einstein, that's the definition of insanity but I think that's a bit of a strong word choice.
“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” -The Dalai Lama.
The choices you make may affect others. Think about the consequences, intended or unintended, before you do something that you may have to explain later. Imagine you are standing in front of a group of people and have to defend what you chose to do.... if you can't manage to do it well, that's a fairly plain indicator it's a bad idea.
If everyone who loves you hates your partner, there might be a problem. If you only have your partner, there IS a problem.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8202/12-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship.html
If he’s mean to you now, he’s only going to get worse. Some people are energy vampires; they feed on the pain they inflict on others. They are broken. They will break you. Get out. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can fix him. You can’t.
You have my permission to say “no.”
If you are depressed, think of it like an illness. You have to treat it. Medicine can help. Talk to your doctor. If you’re drinking a lot, you’re already self-medicating. You might as well get some prescription-grade pharmaceuticals to help you get to a point where you can figure out why you’re self-medicating.
There’s a reason it’s called ‘junk food.’
Yoga is good for the body and the mind as well as soothing the spirit. Try it. Brisk walks are great too.
Don't eat crap. Canned sugary beverages or canned diet beverages are NOT good for you, they have no nutritional value and set you up for a lot of bad stuff. Don't drink them. Water is good. Decide if you can tolerate coffee or tea (I love them both) and then drink those in moderation.
Life is nasty, cold, brutal, unfair, and crappy. It’s also amazing, beautiful, uplifting, awe-inspiring and fun. You choose how you’re going to approach it every day.
I have a few soapboxes that I tend to haul out: I don't like to see people put their health or future at risk and I REALLY don't like to see them put other's health or future at risk. I feel strongly that not providing good sex education or keeping sex education from children is a form of child abuse. It's like sending them out into the world not knowing how to buckle a seatbelt.
I love this video from plannedparenthood.org (How Pregnancy Happens): http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
More good information from plannedparenthood.org on the various methods of birth control:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
I don't have any expertise in abusive relationships, but I do think there are some common sense basics that people who are in one might be missing. Find out more here: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal. |
|
| Latest articles: Questions to ask before getting married!
No replies yet... 24 March 2016: I just read a great article in the New York Times online. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married” It was written by Eleanor Stanford and posted March 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com...
Need Christmas or other holiday gift ideas? Look here!
No replies yet... 3 December 2013: Every year, DearCupid sees an influx of questions asking "What should I get for my boyfriend/girlfriend/significant person? Help!" This question has been asked so many times, we suggest our posters use the search feature of the site here: ...
A little primer on women and sex...
This question has 29 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 November 2011: A Primer on Women and Sex Look, we girls are funny. We don't sexually mature all overnight, our first sexual experiences are often painful, crappy and frankly unfulfilling on many levels. We don't know how to give blowjobs, most of us don't grow up ...
Valentine's Day Gift Ideas
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 January 2011: Each year, we here at DearCupid see many submissions asking, "What should I get my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/lover/partner for Valentine's Day?" I think it would be great to consolidate these questions and some ideas into one place, so I've ...
Retrograde jealousy
This question has 102 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
25 July 2010: DearCupid sees many stories about men and women who find out after they are married that their partners have more sexual experience or partners than was initially understood. It is a very real problem for the one who is devastated to discover the ...
Advice to young men about young women
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2008: I posted this as an answer to a young man, a virgin, who wanted to know about his young girlfriend, also a virgin... First, I know it's hard to believe but a girl her age may not know her body very well. She may not know what is sexually stimula...
More than one way to get up the Duff!!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 March 2008: Some us ‘Aunts’ have been entertaining ourselves with fundamental questions about various ways pregnancy occurs…. I remembered that there were strange stories surrounding the births of some of the gods and goddesses of ancient myth, and I had a ...
|
What does this colleague want? She knows I like her, but she has a boyfriend.
Q. I'll keep this as brief as I can. A girl I really like. We work together. The word got out I liked her. She was getting back with a bf so rejected me. At work I was pleasant if I saw her but our paths rarely crossed. I tried to avoid her as...
A. 25 May 2014: When you say people you meet aren't interested, does this mean you ask for their number or ask them out and they say no'? Or does this mean you get a feeling that they don't like you so you don't bother them any longer, and then perceive that as a ... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm stuck in the friend zone with girls
Q. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm stuck . I've been putting up with liking girls for years and years and years and etc... I really hope that I'm not just being ignored? First it was a girl I liked for 8 years, saved my virginity, didn't date ...
A. 24 May 2014: And based on your question and the followups? It is your issue. Not the girls. Sorry.... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm stuck in the friend zone with girls
Q. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm stuck . I've been putting up with liking girls for years and years and years and etc... I really hope that I'm not just being ignored? First it was a girl I liked for 8 years, saved my virginity, didn't date ...
A. 24 May 2014: You want a different outcome? Then you'll have to change something. Liking the same girl for 8 years then another girl for 14 years got you nowhere in the 'in love' situation.
We have no stake in your relationship with your mental health prov... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm stuck in the friend zone with girls
Q. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm stuck . I've been putting up with liking girls for years and years and years and etc... I really hope that I'm not just being ignored? First it was a girl I liked for 8 years, saved my virginity, didn't date ...
A. 23 May 2014: I'm sorry, I didn't understand the last part of your answer.
So the term has come up before regarding you?
Talk to your psychiatrist about it, on your very next visit.
Did you happen to read any of the links I provided? Not seeing that you did... (read in full...)
My friend ditched me when I was going to the hospital. Why did she get angry?
Q. A friend of mine recently got very angry with me, without me understanding why. I was wondering if you could help me with this. I had become quite sick, and wasn't getting any better. I was talking to my friend that Saturday, and she asked me how...
A. 23 May 2014: I would wait to resolve this until you are feeling better enough to deal with negative feelings.
Her comment about being annoyed by your behavior and your demands suggests she has been forming an opinion about how you were handling things and she ... (read in full...)
What is your "Ultimate Love Song"?
Q. Ok, totally frivolous, recreational question here... Recently a poster asked suggestions about love songs,.. I'd like to extend the question to know which is for you ,fellow Dear Cupiders, the Ultimate Love Song. Not the best, the most original...
A. 23 May 2014: I have to respectfully decline being restricted to just one ultimate song. Not possible. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrIiLvg58SY More Than Words by Extreme
I'm completely dating myself but what the hell. http... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm stuck in the friend zone with girls
Q. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm stuck . I've been putting up with liking girls for years and years and years and etc... I really hope that I'm not just being ignored? First it was a girl I liked for 8 years, saved my virginity, didn't date ...
A. 23 May 2014: Just found this really interesting read: http://www.aspecialgrace.com/resources/Dude-im-an-aspie-book.pdf
This one seems to have some good info:
http://www.lifeonthespectrum.net/blog/?page_id=1001
If you start googling, there is a lot of informati... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm stuck in the friend zone with girls
Q. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm stuck . I've been putting up with liking girls for years and years and years and etc... I really hope that I'm not just being ignored? First it was a girl I liked for 8 years, saved my virginity, didn't date ...
A. 23 May 2014: Hi, I'm a little late to the conversation but I want to bring it back to something Honeypie asked you and you basically didn't answer. Have you been identified as having Asperger's? We ask, not to label or categorize you, but so we can point you in ... (read in full...)
Seeing a guy who has a g/f, and also seeing my ex
Q. Soo what do you think about this?.... theres no argument Im clearly crazy! Im a recovery addict who works has teenage children normal looking etc. But this is my problem.... Iv been seeing a guy who has a girlfriend + me he stays at my house 4 ...
A. 23 May 2014: I would wonder why you are having sex with a man who has a girlfriend when the sex isn't that great anyway, plus you have teenage girls who are looking to you to be a role model for them. Do you want them to grow up confused as to how to make ... (read in full...)
Our friendship was stunted by a comment I made and now I need to know how to handle this, as we work together!
Q. Ok so my situation is this. Im a married man and although I haven't always been happy in my marriage ive always wanted to make it work. Well I had or have this situation going on at work with a coworker or once thought of friend going on. So basi...
A. 23 May 2014: I would assume that the friendship as you knew is now dead and that you will have to focus on maintaining a polite but formal work relationship with her.
You can easily handle the other guys in the office by clearing up the impression that you two ... (read in full...)
I'm about to serve time in prison, so how do I tell my new interest, and how can the relationship survive?
Q. A few days ago, I met this really great guy and even though it's early, things have been going really great for us so far. Yes, I know it's only been a little over a week, but he's been in most of my thoughts and I'm really confident about our ...
A. 23 May 2014: I would let go of trying to manage the outcome of your information and concentrate on delivering the news in as honest and low-key a way as possible.
In other words, put it out there and just accept his reaction as his reaction. Don't try to "con... (read in full...)
What is your "Ultimate Love Song"?
Q. Ok, totally frivolous, recreational question here... Recently a poster asked suggestions about love songs,.. I'd like to extend the question to know which is for you ,fellow Dear Cupiders, the Ultimate Love Song. Not the best, the most original...
A. 23 May 2014: It Had To Be You (written in 1924!) performed by either Frank Sinatra, or here, by Harry Connick, Jr.: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MUqV1HoEYLw
Love these lyrics:
t had to be you, it had to be you
I've wandered around, finally found somebody who... (read in full...)
My husband's father insists of making dinner for us every week! How do we deal with the problems with that?
Q. So here goes... My husband's father is a very large man whose in poor health. My mother in law and husband treat the time with him as precious. He could go at any time from a heart attack. We can see his health declining every week. He can ...
A. 23 May 2014: Forgot to say that you need to get a copy of Ruth Reichl's autobiography "Tender at the Bone." She describes her mother's cooking disasters in loving humorous detail. ... (read in full...)
Is he just a "Player" as I thought he is?
Q. Do you have to be concern if someone that you started exchanging emails online had stopped communicating with you? You see I started chatting with this man online and we even talked on the phone but when he said that he wanted to be my Boyfriend ...
A. 23 May 2014: No, you don't have to be concerned if an online interest turns out to be inappropriately forward, unless you developed feelings for him?
You just move on, ignore, don't spend any time trying to figure him out, it's not worth your time.
If you are ... (read in full...)
My husband's father insists of making dinner for us every week! How do we deal with the problems with that?
Q. So here goes... My husband's father is a very large man whose in poor health. My mother in law and husband treat the time with him as precious. He could go at any time from a heart attack. We can see his health declining every week. He can ...
A. 23 May 2014: I am dealing with aging parents and less than stellar hygiene issues as well. I just smile and make light of it and make sure the food is either safe for consumption or it goes in the bin.
"Thank you so much, dear FIL, for the lovely meal. It's such... (read in full...)
Bad impression of company after first job interview. Do I send a thank you note or leave it behind?
Q. I recently finished my last semester of university and will be taking just one more class this summer. After that, I will be officially graduated. I had my first professional interview today with a small company. The company has been around for 20 ...
A. 23 May 2014: I'd send an email just to get a record of the whole thing and ensure you have something on file if you ever run into these people again in a future hiring situation.
"Dear Interviewer,
"Thank you for the opportunity to interview for the position... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is very upset since his ex is planning on moving farther away with his child!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years, and living together for almost 2 years. He has a young daughter from a previous relationship and until recently things have been great between her mum and my boyfriend. Last month, a huge fight kicke...
A. 23 May 2014: You're not the one who is supposed to find a solution. That's his and his ex's job, alas. You may be on the cusp of discovering his dark place; that is, why he and his ex really broke up....
I think the healthiest thing for you is to stop inte... (read in full...)
I'm engaged but don't want to get married or have kids! Do I break things off?
Q. I've been engaged for a couple of months now. My boyfriend and I had talked about marriage vaguely before, and, as I love him to bits, I had always been positive towards it. It didn't feel like a serious discussion, so I hadn't really thought about ...
A. 22 May 2014: What do you do? You talk to him.
You seem able to articulate some of your feelings and fears as well as your non-negotiable items such as not having children to us. So it's time to put on the big-girl panties and woman up and tell him.
Then,... (read in full...)
She demanded I can't hello-hug any women but she says it's ok for her to do it to guys!
Q. Dear Cupid Early in our relationship my girlfriend demanded that I never give other women a hug-hello since she never hugs guys. Its so rare that I hug-hello anyways, and then, only to real friends who cannot misinterpret it as flirting. However,...
A. 22 May 2014: Did you notice this question was written in 2007?
;) I expect the OP has his answer by now. ... (read in full...)
Any rocker girl band love song ideas?
Q. I need help with a small problem. My boyfriend and I have a cute little thing going where we tell each other to look up cute love songs and then add them to a playlist we have on Grooveshark. He has to look up songs by guy bands and I have to look ...
A. 22 May 2014: How about you open up your category to include singer/songwriters? You'll have more to choose from. :)
I loved this folkie/indie duo from Atlanta, The Indigo Girls: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hj0yVN8pFNw
I liked this band "Fruit" from Aus... (read in full...)
I broke up with my LDR b/f because I wanted to date in real life. Should I not done so?
Q. I was in a long distance relationship for a little less than a year. My ex (feels weird to write that) was in a different country. I was very fond of him, I cared about him, and I know some people wouldn't call it love, but I loved him. I never met ...
A. 22 May 2014: I think you did the right thing for yourself. You knew being in the LDR was keeping you from finding a companion to be with in person.
Like any breakup, you will have some unsettling feelings as you mourn the end of the relationship. This will pass... (read in full...)
I used to like my body shape but the digs keep coming ...
Q. In my adult life a LOT of people have asked if I'm pregnant, even though there has never been any reason for it other than my fat belly! A bit of back story, I have a bit of a buddha belly lol, in fact I'm very slim but my belly just puts on all t...
A. 19 May 2014: "It's an inoperable tumor and I've been told I have 6 months to live."
Pause, wait for the reaction.
"No, I just said that because I'm sick and tired of people commenting on my belly. Perhaps next time you will take a moment before you blurt ou... (read in full...)
I want to stay friends with 'the other woman' but she says she hates me
Q. I am a separated male who still is friendly with my wife, we have 2 beautiful teenage girls and we remain very close after 6 years of separation. We still share family vacations and days out as a family and even the bed 1 - 2 times a month. I live...
A. 15 May 2014: "I was terrified my wife would find out"
Right there. There it is. That's where your heart is. You were more concerned with your wife's finding out than being with your "friend." You never once in your question said you were in love with your FWB.... (read in full...)
I want to stay friends with 'the other woman' but she says she hates me
Q. I am a separated male who still is friendly with my wife, we have 2 beautiful teenage girls and we remain very close after 6 years of separation. We still share family vacations and days out as a family and even the bed 1 - 2 times a month. I live...
A. 15 May 2014: What broken heart? You never said you were in love with her. You stayed in the marriage and in the marital bed with your wife for the entire time you were with her.
... (read in full...)
I'm so sick and tired of being leeched off of.
Q. Here's the situation. I use to live alone in a two bedroom apartment. One room for me to sleep, use computer, hang out, etc. The other room was my workout room with all my weights, benchs, punching bag, etc. I enjoyed the solitary lifestyle. My own ...
A. 14 May 2014: Also, take all the entertainment type of electronics, TV, computer, video games, etc, over to your girlfriend's place. Explain that you had to pawn them to pay your bills.
Make sure they don't have access to your mail or your credit. Get a PO box ... (read in full...)
I'm so sick and tired of being leeched off of.
Q. Here's the situation. I use to live alone in a two bedroom apartment. One room for me to sleep, use computer, hang out, etc. The other room was my workout room with all my weights, benchs, punching bag, etc. I enjoyed the solitary lifestyle. My own ...
A. 14 May 2014: Do not avoid paying your bills. You will ruin your credit if you do that. Do not leave the apartment, you will look like you have sublet it to the mooching family members and you may wind up being evicted and again, it will affect your credit.
I... (read in full...)
I want to stay friends with 'the other woman' but she says she hates me
Q. I am a separated male who still is friendly with my wife, we have 2 beautiful teenage girls and we remain very close after 6 years of separation. We still share family vacations and days out as a family and even the bed 1 - 2 times a month. I live...
A. 14 May 2014: Dude. She changed her email and her phone number just so she wouldn't have to talk to you. Respect that.
You will have to make your own closure. I know you rely on your wife and previously on your FWB for your emotional support but it's time you ... (read in full...)
What does it mean?
Q. What does it mean when a guy does these things? What does it mean? So my boyfriend of 9 months (we didn't have sex) started acting distant and irritated with me and I couldn't stop hurting:( He'd ignore me for days when we argue and get ...
A. 14 May 2014: Does he get drunk often and send messages he will regret later? You said he sent it last night. Maybe he was feeling annoyed at what he considers to be an unhappy breakup and just sent you that video out of spite. Your last comment to him was that ... (read in full...)
How do I react to my daughter dating a non-Jew?
Q. I have a daughter who is in a relationship with an atheist man. In order to be with him and out of our disapproving sight she moved far away. Now she wants to reconcile with us and come back home. We are willing to reconcile with her, but not if she ...
A. 14 May 2014: OP (original poster, in case you don't know that term), you've had 20 answers. Do you have any followup that will help people provide advice. A lot of people have taken the time to consider your situation and compose a reply, it would be courteous ... (read in full...)
What type of condom do you recommend for the first time?
Q. Hi! So I am a virgin currently. My boyfriend and I are planning to have sex. I'm a virgin and he isn't. My question is: What type of condom do you recommend for my first time? He wants to use fire and ice but I'm not so sure since if it hur...
A. 7 May 2014: You could try out what the fire and ice lubricants feel like without penetration, by yourself, without him around, to decide if you can tolerate the sensations.
I think the old fashioned, regular ordinary condoms are enough for the first time. Why ... (read in full...)
My fiancee didn't tell me that he's frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is involved!
Q. I need help. My fiancee didn't tell me that he is frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is going on. I am devastated. He says that he went there for relaxation but i can't see how going to prostitutes is a form of relaxation. ...
A. 6 May 2014: I thought that you and she had a lot in common, you even sound the same!
The best revenge is living well. Any other type of revenge just pulls you back down in the mire. Rise above, move on, and get that counseling if you are stuck.
Best wishes.... (read in full...)
Do I join my parents' birthday celebration, or stay with my partner for his?
Q. My dad and step mum both turn 60 this year and as their birthdays are two weeks apart they have decided to throw a joint party on the weekend in between their birthdays. They've never had a party before and I never see them on their actual ...
A. 6 May 2014: This one is easy. Take your partner's birthday right out of it. (Though why all these grown ups are throwing tantrums about their birthdays puzzles me, insisting on celebrating on the day is so childish, to me. Anyhoo.)
The baby will be too youn... (read in full...)
My fiancee didn't tell me that he's frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is involved!
Q. I need help. My fiancee didn't tell me that he is frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is going on. I am devastated. He says that he went there for relaxation but i can't see how going to prostitutes is a form of relaxation. ...
A. 6 May 2014: I didn't say you would forget it. I said that you are in a mourning process for the end of the relationship. You will have to get to a new 'normal' and that will take some time; rely on friends and family for support during this difficult time.
T... (read in full...)
Why is she taking birth control?
Q. I'm in a LDR, my girlfriend and I are in different countries due to school and we can see each other every three months or so. she is on the pill. why would a girl be on birth control if she is not supposed to be sexually active?...
A. 6 May 2014: You don't stop and start the birth control pill every 3 months. It's a continual hormone regulation and that stopping/starting isn't something that is done to women.
Is there some lack of trust on your part about this relationship other than the ... (read in full...)
I like two guys, what to do?
Q. I am a 20 year old female. I am currently seeing two guys, one is a boyfriend of almost 2 years and the other I met a few months ago. The reason I have a second guy is because it has been getting stale with my boyfriend in recent months, and ...
A. 6 May 2014: This type of question is generally very easy to figure out. You just have to ask yourself what you would like if the shoe were on the other foot.
I expect you'd be very annoyed to find out your boyfriend was seeing someone else because you had beco... (read in full...)
Am I wrong for being mad about these 'friends'?
Q. How do you see this situation? Am I wrong for being mad about them? We have a vacation house that we come to from another state approximately 6-7 times a year. Ussualy for kids holidays, just a short break away from work, long weekends, etc. ...
A. 6 May 2014: You should check with your insurance company as well. If you are using it as a rental property then your policy needs to reflect that.
As for the former friends, don't talk about them to anyone. Just be polite if you run into them on the stre... (read in full...)
My fiancee didn't tell me that he's frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is involved!
Q. I need help. My fiancee didn't tell me that he is frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is going on. I am devastated. He says that he went there for relaxation but i can't see how going to prostitutes is a form of relaxation. ...
A. 6 May 2014: Well, as you are 21 and were with him for 4 years, you have obviously only ever been serious with him. So breaking up isn't easy or nice but the feelings will pass.
Don't keep talking to him, that will only prolong the mourning process.
Seek ... (read in full...)
My fiancee didn't tell me that he's frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is involved!
Q. I need help. My fiancee didn't tell me that he is frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is going on. I am devastated. He says that he went there for relaxation but i can't see how going to prostitutes is a form of relaxation. ...
A. 6 May 2014: I remembered a question that covered this just 2 months ago: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-boyfriends-friends-visit-massage-parlors-for-happy.html
... (read in full...)
My fiancee didn't tell me that he's frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is involved!
Q. I need help. My fiancee didn't tell me that he is frequenting these so called massage places where prostitution is going on. I am devastated. He says that he went there for relaxation but i can't see how going to prostitutes is a form of relaxation. ...
A. 5 May 2014: I'm confused. You wrote "I definitely don't want to get involved with anyone who frequents these places" but in your question "we have been together for 4 years."
So are you with a man or is this more of a soapbox type post?
If your fiancee ... (read in full...)
How much does porn influence a mans expectations of how a woman should look naked?
Q. Ok please help aunts and uncles .... I'm single and ready to date again after a lengthy marriage. I have met a few guys but one really nice one and I'm pretty sure things will become physical soon I'm just a little worried thought as I know he has...
A. 1 May 2014: This man should be profoundly grateful that he is even in the same room with you naked. He should be worried that HE is worthy of YOU. That's the way you ought to be thinking about this.
Not, "am I enough?" but "I am a beautiful woman and I dese... (read in full...)
How can I defend myself against this worker?
Q. Hi Everyone. I apologise for the length of this problem. OKAY so I am quite an easy going person. I respond to banter, even the odd jokey name calling and can take a joke as well as the next person. But I am also very shy, sensitive and som...
A. 30 April 2014: "I see you hold a different opinion on the subject. We'll just have to agree to disagree. Now I have to get back to work."
"That was a personally hurtful remark. I will overlook it this time but I will not tolerate that sort of comment from you... (read in full...)
He was rough during sex and I bled from it. How do I bring this up?
Q. I met this guy and we slept together but he was quite rough and I bled, I know why I bled, it's because I only lost my virginity a few months ago and I've only had sex twice since. He doesn't know this and assumed I was just coming on my period, how ...
A. 30 April 2014: "Harry, I need to tell you something about the last time we had sex. I wasn't coming on my period. I bled because the sex was too rough for me. I had sex less than 5 times in my life. I know I should have told you but for some reason, I didn't know ... (read in full...)
Oral sex with no protection..should I worry about disease?
Q. I'm in the habit of frequenting sex workers on a weekly basis. Now, I typically use condoms where penetrative sex is concerned but there have been occasions where I've received unprotected oral sex. I've done some research and apparently, it's ...
A. 30 April 2014: I think you fall into a high-risk category for STDs. If you have never been tested, it's way past time. Go see your doctor and be honest. They can't help you if you don't disclose information pertinent to your health and well-being.
The Mayo Clin... (read in full...)
What does this colleague want? She knows I like her, but she has a boyfriend.
Q. I'll keep this as brief as I can. A girl I really like. We work together. The word got out I liked her. She was getting back with a bf so rejected me. At work I was pleasant if I saw her but our paths rarely crossed. I tried to avoid her as...
A. 30 April 2014: And based on this one: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/is-she-trying-to-get-my-attention-does.html you really never worked up the nerve to ask her out because you felt you weren't attractive enough for her.
You could just try to ask her out and ... (read in full...)
What does this colleague want? She knows I like her, but she has a boyfriend.
Q. I'll keep this as brief as I can. A girl I really like. We work together. The word got out I liked her. She was getting back with a bf so rejected me. At work I was pleasant if I saw her but our paths rarely crossed. I tried to avoid her as...
A. 30 April 2014: Hi Barry, I found your most recent question about her, which gave more detail: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-crush-has-become-more-attentive-is-it.html
So you are really interested in her, what answer are you hoping for from the aunts here... (read in full...)
What does this colleague want? She knows I like her, but she has a boyfriend.
Q. I'll keep this as brief as I can. A girl I really like. We work together. The word got out I liked her. She was getting back with a bf so rejected me. At work I was pleasant if I saw her but our paths rarely crossed. I tried to avoid her as...
A. 30 April 2014: Look, you are overthinking this. You told a colleague you liked her, she reported she wasn't available. It wasn't a rejection of you as a person. She is unavailable. (She should be anyway, because you work together, but that's another discussion.)
S... (read in full...)
What does this colleague want? She knows I like her, but she has a boyfriend.
Q. I'll keep this as brief as I can. A girl I really like. We work together. The word got out I liked her. She was getting back with a bf so rejected me. At work I was pleasant if I saw her but our paths rarely crossed. I tried to avoid her as...
A. 30 April 2014: Thank you for the followup. Did you ask her out and she said 'no' or did this all happen through rumor and third-party interactions?... (read in full...)
What does this colleague want? She knows I like her, but she has a boyfriend.
Q. I'll keep this as brief as I can. A girl I really like. We work together. The word got out I liked her. She was getting back with a bf so rejected me. At work I was pleasant if I saw her but our paths rarely crossed. I tried to avoid her as...
A. 30 April 2014: Barry, I took a look at your past questions just to see if you'd written about the rejection you experienced, and I found an almost identical question from 3 years ago: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-really-like-this-girl-at-work-does.html
I... (read in full...)
What does this colleague want? She knows I like her, but she has a boyfriend.
Q. I'll keep this as brief as I can. A girl I really like. We work together. The word got out I liked her. She was getting back with a bf so rejected me. At work I was pleasant if I saw her but our paths rarely crossed. I tried to avoid her as...
A. 30 April 2014: I don't see where she's begging for your attention here. You say 'word got out I liked her.' So there was gossip going on? Were you being overtly attracted to her or did you tell someone? It sounds so odd. 'Word got out I liked her.' You then ... (read in full...)
| *isha-1's friends
These are mutual friends, so *isha-1 has
added them and they have added *isha-1!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
