A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi!So I am a virgin currently. My boyfriend and I are planning to have sex. I'm a virgin and he isn't.My question is: What type of condom do you recommend for my first time?He wants to use fire and ice but I'm not so sure since if it hurts, I don't know if the mix of pain and fire and ice would be a good first impression. But again, I'm a virgin female and wouldn't know so that's why I'm asking the more experienced people (a.k.a. you) :)So again: What type of condom do you recommend for the first time?
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (7 May 2014):
 I'd go with something a little less "fancy".
Your BF needs to hold his horse and wait with the "fun" stuff til you are more comfortable with sex in general.
I will second you considering to get on birth-control yourself and BE on it for a good 30-45 days before sex (and yes, still use a condom). Condoms are generally safe, but in the long run using BOTH is SAFER.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2014): If you have sensitive skin, you might want to try one without spermicide…I'm REALLY sensitive to condoms that have spermicide on them, they make me burn/itch down there!!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 May 2014):
 plain name brand lubricated condoms would be my bet.
durex or trojan... I would not go for fancy at this point.
I also would suggest a hormonal method of Birth Control for you such as an implant or pills before your first encounter.
Condoms are great for preventing the spread of disease but I tend NOT to rely on them for pregnancy prevention as much as I prefer birth control pills.
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A
male
reader, Mark1978  +, writes (7 May 2014):
 I would stick to "Extra Safe" condoms. Other types can give less protection, although of course should all come certified to relevant standards. Not all condoms are spermicidally lubricated, generally extra safe are. This reduces the risk of pregnancy further.
Might be a good idea for both of you to be familiar with using a condom correctly, some great online instructions/videos. Its amazing how many people fail to use them correctly which can lead to splitting, leakage, etc.
And for those of you had sex education at school....in real life you don't put them on a cucumber ;-)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2014): Just go plain, there's no need to get spicy on your first time.
Fire and ice, flavoured lubes, using ice cubes or giving head while eating mints and stuff, that's all stuff to play around with later.
You want to get the hang of the whole process before you get "wild".
Plus as Tisha says you may well have an adverse reaction and who knows maybe even a pretty nasty allergic reaction to it.
Just make sure they're good quality comdoms and not some 5 years in a wallet thing that has fallen apart, or cheap crap from a vending machine in a pub toilet.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2014): You need a benchmark OP. So that you can know what you like and what you don't like, you need to start with the basics. Do the basics and use the basics the first few times so that you are completely used to it and in your element.Then you can introduce flavours etc and compare them to the time without so that you see how much you do or don't like them. Sex is a wonderful thing OP, appreciate it for the naturally beautiful thing it is first before you get creative or you miss out on the whole purpose of it - intimacy. Your first time shouldn't be about the flavour of the condom. It's about you and he sharing intimacy and sharing your bodies in the most vulnerable and sweetest ways possible.
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (7 May 2014):
Just use a regular condom. To be honest your first time is going to be complicated enough without adding in something like that to the mix. It typically takes a few times before sex becomes fun and pleasurable, plus as you mentioned you don't know how that stuff is going to feel if you break skin.
Tell Tiger to take it easy till you are both used to having sex and you are starting to figure out what you like and don't like.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 May 2014):
 You could try out what the fire and ice lubricants feel like without penetration, by yourself, without him around, to decide if you can tolerate the sensations.
I think the old fashioned, regular ordinary condoms are enough for the first time. Why does he need to add chemical stimulants to the first time for you? That's overkill, to me. Maybe he's worried about making sure you have a good experience and has decided to believe the marketing?
Whatever the reason, you should be in charge of the details of the first time. Do not agree to something you aren't 100% sure of.
I have tried those he/she lubricant combos. They do not feel good to me, they just cause pain and irritation to my sensitive tissue. Not for me! And I shudder to think what that would have done to my interest in sexual intimacy, if I'd had to hop up and run screaming to the shower to wash off the chemical irritants. Yuck. For a first time, that would have been the absolute pits.
Now that I think about it more, what the hell is he thinking? Say NO!
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (7 May 2014):
 Fire and ice condoms ? ... It reminds of those muscle rubs for sore muscles and stiff backs, :) ( which btw feel horrible, IMO )
No. Just use a regular lubricated condom ( and bring along a good latex compatible lube ). You'll have plenty of time to experiment with fancy condoms once you got comfortable with just plain having sex .
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