Like what
she writes?
... Add *isha-1 to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *isha-1 a private message | | *isha-1's profile:Hi there!
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal.
I heard this quote recently: ""The truth is like castor oil. It’s difficult to take and hard to swallow, so we get them to laugh and while their mouths are open, we pour a little in." -Harold Clurman
If you have an urgent question, please post it on the main page. Real life keeps me busy and has enough going on to keep me from being on here 24/7.... I hope yours does too! ;)
Current book recommendation: Untethered Soul, by Michael Singer. A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. The Power of Now, also by Eckhart Tolle. Really powerful stuff in there about not letting your runaway thoughts take over your life. Be present in the Now. You have what you need, right there, right inside yourself. Do yourself a HUGE favor and read these books. They may lead to an important and fundamental shift in your well-being. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." --Eckhart Tolle
All time fave relationship figure out book: A Fine Romance, Judith Sills, PhD. Buy if you are stuck and can't figure out why he won't commit, or why you keep picking guys who can't commit.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck." -The Dalai Lama
"Most people are doing the best they can, given what they know and understand. Including you. If they knew more and were aware of more, they would do things differently." -- Louise Hay
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain
I like these links right now: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4593/A-Simple-Way-to-Let-Go-of-Our-Negative-Patterns.html
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/04/04/25-life-lessons/
So here's the thing. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Weakness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Actually, according to Albert Einstein, that's the definition of insanity but I think that's a bit of a strong word choice.
“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” -The Dalai Lama.
The choices you make may affect others. Think about the consequences, intended or unintended, before you do something that you may have to explain later. Imagine you are standing in front of a group of people and have to defend what you chose to do.... if you can't manage to do it well, that's a fairly plain indicator it's a bad idea.
If everyone who loves you hates your partner, there might be a problem. If you only have your partner, there IS a problem.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8202/12-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship.html
If he’s mean to you now, he’s only going to get worse. Some people are energy vampires; they feed on the pain they inflict on others. They are broken. They will break you. Get out. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can fix him. You can’t.
You have my permission to say “no.”
If you are depressed, think of it like an illness. You have to treat it. Medicine can help. Talk to your doctor. If you’re drinking a lot, you’re already self-medicating. You might as well get some prescription-grade pharmaceuticals to help you get to a point where you can figure out why you’re self-medicating.
There’s a reason it’s called ‘junk food.’
Yoga is good for the body and the mind as well as soothing the spirit. Try it. Brisk walks are great too.
Don't eat crap. Canned sugary beverages or canned diet beverages are NOT good for you, they have no nutritional value and set you up for a lot of bad stuff. Don't drink them. Water is good. Decide if you can tolerate coffee or tea (I love them both) and then drink those in moderation.
Life is nasty, cold, brutal, unfair, and crappy. It’s also amazing, beautiful, uplifting, awe-inspiring and fun. You choose how you’re going to approach it every day.
I have a few soapboxes that I tend to haul out: I don't like to see people put their health or future at risk and I REALLY don't like to see them put other's health or future at risk. I feel strongly that not providing good sex education or keeping sex education from children is a form of child abuse. It's like sending them out into the world not knowing how to buckle a seatbelt.
I love this video from plannedparenthood.org (How Pregnancy Happens): http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
More good information from plannedparenthood.org on the various methods of birth control:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
I don't have any expertise in abusive relationships, but I do think there are some common sense basics that people who are in one might be missing. Find out more here: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal. |
|
Latest articles: Questions to ask before getting married!
No replies yet... 24 March 2016: I just read a great article in the New York Times online. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married” It was written by Eleanor Stanford and posted March 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com...
Need Christmas or other holiday gift ideas? Look here!
No replies yet... 3 December 2013: Every year, DearCupid sees an influx of questions asking "What should I get for my boyfriend/girlfriend/significant person? Help!" This question has been asked so many times, we suggest our posters use the search feature of the site here: ...
A little primer on women and sex...
This question has 29 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 November 2011: A Primer on Women and Sex Look, we girls are funny. We don't sexually mature all overnight, our first sexual experiences are often painful, crappy and frankly unfulfilling on many levels. We don't know how to give blowjobs, most of us don't grow up ...
Valentine's Day Gift Ideas
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 January 2011: Each year, we here at DearCupid see many submissions asking, "What should I get my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/lover/partner for Valentine's Day?" I think it would be great to consolidate these questions and some ideas into one place, so I've ...
Retrograde jealousy
This question has 102 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
25 July 2010: DearCupid sees many stories about men and women who find out after they are married that their partners have more sexual experience or partners than was initially understood. It is a very real problem for the one who is devastated to discover the ...
Advice to young men about young women
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2008: I posted this as an answer to a young man, a virgin, who wanted to know about his young girlfriend, also a virgin... First, I know it's hard to believe but a girl her age may not know her body very well. She may not know what is sexually stimula...
More than one way to get up the Duff!!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 March 2008: Some us ‘Aunts’ have been entertaining ourselves with fundamental questions about various ways pregnancy occurs…. I remembered that there were strange stories surrounding the births of some of the gods and goddesses of ancient myth, and I had a ...
|
Could she be sleeping with other men, or intending to do so?
Q. My long term friend with benefits recently told me that she needed some space, and she was emphatic that I respect her wishes. Here's the confusing part: we still have sex a couple of times a month, and when I do leave her alone she will reach out ...
A. 28 September 2015: Sounds like it's time to end the relationship. If there's no trust and a lack of honesty... what's the point?
She wasn't invested in this relationship anyway.
So the good news is that you can start the mourning and healing, and you only waited a... (read in full...)
My fiance has become the "Church lady" and I don't know how to deal with it
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together about 6 ½ years. Last winter we told our friends and families that we intend to marry someday soon. No ring but we went that far, so I guess she’s my fiancé. We are both in our 40’s. She has children, nearly g...
A. 16 September 2015: I think she need to hear from you "I have talked with her about this - often, but you know what I will not do? I will not argue about it, so I do a lot of walking away. Unfortunately, she seems to have aligned herself with a sect who encourages ... (read in full...)
We're both married but I want her in my life! How do I get her back?
Q. Hi Friends Really sad for me..... Both of us are married, she is 30 and I am 42. I met her few month back in her office. She is beautiful and nice. We start talking on phone and chat. But when she came to know my feelings through mail. She asked ...
A. 16 September 2015: Well, if any female friend can advice you on how to get this woman back into your life, have you asked your wife? She might have an opinion on how best to accomplish that goal.
Amit, you will need to face facts. Face reality. Accept this.
this ... (read in full...)
My friend got my 19 year old niece pregnant! Should I be mad at my friend and drop him?
Q. I am a 44 year old man and have a 34 year olf friend. He recently me my niece through me and had sex with her now she pregnant. She is 19 and very immature and unprepared for the real world. her father, (my brother) doesn't care and her mother ...
A. 15 September 2015: And if he does shirk his parental responsibilities then make sure he is legally and financially dealt with so that the child doesn't suffer as a result of grownups acting badly.... (read in full...)
My friend got my 19 year old niece pregnant! Should I be mad at my friend and drop him?
Q. I am a 44 year old man and have a 34 year olf friend. He recently me my niece through me and had sex with her now she pregnant. She is 19 and very immature and unprepared for the real world. her father, (my brother) doesn't care and her mother ...
A. 15 September 2015: If you drop him, doesn't that just estrange you from the father of your niece's baby? How would that help the situation?
Obviously you don't agree with his choice nor your niece's choice; however, they are both adults and responsible for them... (read in full...)
My fiance has become the "Church lady" and I don't know how to deal with it
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together about 6 ½ years. Last winter we told our friends and families that we intend to marry someday soon. No ring but we went that far, so I guess she’s my fiancé. We are both in our 40’s. She has children, nearly g...
A. 15 September 2015: "Charlene, let's discuss religion, faith, belief and this relationship. Obviously, you have found your faith and reconnected with your religion.
"I have done my best to keep silent about how I feel about this change in you. However, as you have repe... (read in full...)
Why is my ex-friend even trying with me?
Q. My female friend treated me badly - she had an affair with my boyfriend behind my back, lied to me and basically treated me like dirt. We fell out obviously - but now she wants to make up and says she feels bad about everything she's done. ...
A. 15 September 2015: "Hey, [ex-friend's name], I understand that you want to make up and apologize for what you've done. While that apparently works for your timetable and for you, alas, it doesn't work for me.
"I will let you know, in my own time, if and when I migh... (read in full...)
Is this what men are really like in their thoughts and feelings?
Q. I have only had one bf before and I'm just really confused if it is my lack of experience or in fact, what men are. My new bf been with him for over a year. We live together and he tells me how I'm perfect and how much he loves me and wants to be ...
A. 15 September 2015: You boyfriend sounds like, um, well, a drama king. We go from all macho talk, hanging out with friends whose only interaction with women apparently revolves around making comments about them while simultaneously trying to get them into bed, talking ... (read in full...)
Is this what men are really like in their thoughts and feelings?
Q. I have only had one bf before and I'm just really confused if it is my lack of experience or in fact, what men are. My new bf been with him for over a year. We live together and he tells me how I'm perfect and how much he loves me and wants to be ...
A. 15 September 2015: Is this what men are really like in their thoughts and feelings AND ACTIONS?
Well, I expect most heterosexual men have thoughts and fantasies about sex with other women. Many probably involve threesomes.
I can't answer as to his feelings as appar... (read in full...)
He tells me to stop moaning! Help me out, I need advice, everybody tell me what to do!
Q. Just started dating a guy Ive known 20yrs cos he been asking me out for ever and said I mean whole world to him. Hes a lovely guy and I thought life’s getting better. But now we together, he works away and never texts me, except every 3 days ...
A. 14 September 2015: Oh my goodness. You have a guy who tells you to "stop moaning," apparently has blowjobs on tap from you and does nothing to make you moan in the right way.
Woman. What the hell. This guy is a loser with a capital L.
I don't care if you've known hi... (read in full...)
Was this girl a virgin?
Q. Was this girl a virgin? This may seem like an odd question, but I assure you that the answer is important to me (I won’t get into the reasons why it is important). I have my opinion of the answer, but I’m “just a guy”. I would be very grateful fo...
A. 14 September 2015: One other thought. why weren't condoms used? You had known each other one week, even if she had not had PIV intercourse before, and believed that you hadn't either, and she was on oral contraception as means to manage her dysmenorrhea, that didn't ... (read in full...)
Was this girl a virgin?
Q. Was this girl a virgin? This may seem like an odd question, but I assure you that the answer is important to me (I won’t get into the reasons why it is important). I have my opinion of the answer, but I’m “just a guy”. I would be very grateful fo...
A. 14 September 2015: What's the likelihood that this woman was a virgin? Well, she sounds comfortable enough sexually, so she could have been sexually active without having had penis-in-vagina sex before. As in, she could have done everything else but that. But as we ... (read in full...)
Guy does lots of eye contact, but never start a conversation?
Q. Hello, recently I've been thinking about this guy a lot, nonstop. I've liked this guy for years, but finally I decided to try to give him signs that I do like him. So a year ago, after I've worked on my confidence issues and tried to be more open ...
A. 14 September 2015: Z:^)
\m/... (read in full...)
Guy does lots of eye contact, but never start a conversation?
Q. Hello, recently I've been thinking about this guy a lot, nonstop. I've liked this guy for years, but finally I decided to try to give him signs that I do like him. So a year ago, after I've worked on my confidence issues and tried to be more open ...
A. 14 September 2015: I meant the thumb by your ear and the pinkie finger by your mouth, having tried it again. Oops. :) \nn/... (read in full...)
Guy does lots of eye contact, but never start a conversation?
Q. Hello, recently I've been thinking about this guy a lot, nonstop. I've liked this guy for years, but finally I decided to try to give him signs that I do like him. So a year ago, after I've worked on my confidence issues and tried to be more open ...
A. 14 September 2015: Put your thumb and pinkie finger out in a "Y," hold the thumb near your mouth and the pinkie near your ear and mouth the words "call me" and then smile. Okay, I know, that'll make you too shy to do.
Wave hello the next time you make eye contact and ... (read in full...)
He owes me over $5000 US and he's full of excuses and says he can't live without me. What should I do?
Q. I am a British expat in Asia. I met my current boyfriend in an Asian city. He was unemployed so I let him live with me rent free and I also paid for everything: food, his clothes, watch etc, basically everything. He had promised that from the ...
A. 14 September 2015: And did you find an Al-Anon meeting?... (read in full...)
He owes me over $5000 US and he's full of excuses and says he can't live without me. What should I do?
Q. I am a British expat in Asia. I met my current boyfriend in an Asian city. He was unemployed so I let him live with me rent free and I also paid for everything: food, his clothes, watch etc, basically everything. He had promised that from the ...
A. 14 September 2015: I hope you haven't taken on any more financial responsibility for this man and his friends.
If I were you, I'd contact my friends and family, all of them, and ask them all for small loans that I would pay back in a year's time. I would use thos... (read in full...)
Could she be sleeping with other men, or intending to do so?
Q. My long term friend with benefits recently told me that she needed some space, and she was emphatic that I respect her wishes. Here's the confusing part: we still have sex a couple of times a month, and when I do leave her alone she will reach out ...
A. 14 September 2015: "She has given me a lot of hints over time about me slipping a bit in the courting department, which is something I attribute to the normal nuances of long term dating."
"what's holding me back is having to go through the whole dating page... (read in full...)
Is my friend (rightfully) angry since she hasn’t answered my email for days?
Q. A decade ago my hubby and I moved to one of the most beautiful and touristic cities in Europe. We knew that our friends would visit. And they did. One more than others, let’s call her K. She’s smart, witty, sociable, makes friends easily … and she ...
A. 14 September 2015: You are worrying too much about this! So what if you had close family come and stay for a week two separate times? That's how you know the apartment is too small! :D
I would be on guard for her "plans falling through at the last minute" and her ... (read in full...)
Does this not seem like a very strange interaction and departure?
Q. My now ex-Gen. Manager left our place of business under suspicious circumstances. The business had been growing. and getting better since he opened it. Great staff and management team. Award wining company. Anyway, since the day he hired me, he has ...
A. 14 September 2015: Are you trying to piece together evidence suggesting that you somehow affected his work and caused his departure?
It does sound like he was under some stress but whether that was your presence in the workplace or some other personal or prof... (read in full...)
How do I speed things up sexually with my girlfriend?
Q. I have a problem on my hands. A bi dude asked me if I wanted him to suck my dick. I replied I'm not sure, because I am already dating a girl. Honestly, I want my first sexual experience to be with a girl, but my girlfriend takes things slow,and were ...
A. 14 September 2015: How old is your girlfriend?... (read in full...)
Guy acting too clingy and annoying? he's acting creepy...
Q. Here is a guy who had texted me a few months ago, he was just asking me questions about random things and it was just a small talk. Then he started to take stuff more seriously, he just kept texting me for hours, and I thought that he's just trying ...
A. 11 September 2015: I've copy/pasted an entry from that last website as it has great resources listed:
Problems
Stalking and harassment
Anyone who has ever been stalked and/or suffered harassment knows the devastating effect it has upon feelings of safety, ... (read in full...)
Kicking myself for a missed opportunity
Q. Help. I just turned 40, so in affect I'm now 'middle aged'. I'm not one for dating or looking for dates much - I just take life as it comes. Recently however, I have been kicking myself for turning down a gorgeous guy who was chatting me up online. ...
A. 11 September 2015: Oh and block him on FB or whatever social media you are watching him on. That's just not worth the energy at this point.... (read in full...)
Kicking myself for a missed opportunity
Q. Help. I just turned 40, so in affect I'm now 'middle aged'. I'm not one for dating or looking for dates much - I just take life as it comes. Recently however, I have been kicking myself for turning down a gorgeous guy who was chatting me up online. ...
A. 11 September 2015: I don't see how you would have been happy with a guy you didn't fundamentally trust from the beginning. You think he's a player, you rejected his advances and things got heated up enough that you fell out about it?
What missed opportunity? This was ... (read in full...)
Should I just cut my losses?
Q. I've become really close to this guy over the summer. We are casually dating. We're always communicating and he's a really nice guy. I'm going back to uni on monday and he hasn't tried to see me or even seem bothered.. He seems interested other...
A. 11 September 2015: "Hey, as you know I'm leaving Monday, you haven't mentioned it at all. I was wondering what you were thinking about that, if you had any comment at all?"
Just ask him. If you are becoming really close, wouldn't it make sense to be clear about thin... (read in full...)
Guy acting too clingy and annoying? he's acting creepy...
Q. Here is a guy who had texted me a few months ago, he was just asking me questions about random things and it was just a small talk. Then he started to take stuff more seriously, he just kept texting me for hours, and I thought that he's just trying ...
A. 11 September 2015: "I am going to say this very plainly so you will understand. Stop texting me. Stop contacting me. I do not wish to hear from you. Any further messages from you will be document and will be used in court against you, if needed. Any further contact ... (read in full...)
Do women ever regret giving up a good guy for a bad guy?
Q. Hello,do women ever regret, going back, with a abusive ex after being with a nice guy, an do they ever think about the nice guy...
A. 11 September 2015: A woman who is stuck in a cycle of abuse probably doesn't think too much but getting through the next 10 minutes or hour on how to stay alive or uninjured.
So if you are feeling badly that she is trapped in a cycle of abuse and didn't choose you,... (read in full...)
Should I go for it and have a threesome with my boyfriend and girlfriend?
Q. Need open and none judgemental advice people. I have a boyfriend and a gf. They both know about each other and they are both ok with the situation. The reason why I have two was I met them both within a week of each other and was "dating" like you ...
A. 11 September 2015: I have no way of offering life experience on this, other than to suggest you run the analysis.
First of all, is there some time element in this, does this need to happen soon for any reason?
What is the best thing that can happen if you don't ha... (read in full...)
Why do you suppose he wouldn't suggest another meeting outside of his work situation?
Q. Here's what's happening. Friends wanted to set me up with a friend of theirs. The guy texted me and asked me if I'd like to come to his place of work to meet up for a drink. (He tends bar part time and has a professional job during the day.) I ...
A. 11 September 2015: Oh, and if he works for your friends? He may not have wanted to do any of this but was concerned for his part time job and just went along with them so as not to offend them.
Whatevs.
Don't take it personally. It will most likely have nothing ... (read in full...)
Why do you suppose he wouldn't suggest another meeting outside of his work situation?
Q. Here's what's happening. Friends wanted to set me up with a friend of theirs. The guy texted me and asked me if I'd like to come to his place of work to meet up for a drink. (He tends bar part time and has a professional job during the day.) I ...
A. 11 September 2015: I think he just didn't see himself with you in a dating situation.
The bad news is that he didn't see you as a potential date
The good news is that he didn't prolong things beyond the awkward blind date thing your friends set up.
If he's working... (read in full...)
Can anyone give me feedback on taking Xanax?
Q. This is a health question, but I'm hoping to get some opinion. At the last few month , I'm having a very bad time, with numerous health complains, but when I go for tests, everything looks ok. The doctor is running of ideas, what could be wr...
A. 11 September 2015: You say your "thyroid test" was normal. In the singular. So I would suggest you ask that a full panel be run.
Fatigue, back pain, muscle pain, crying spells. You also said many bad things have happened.
Have you been evaluated for PTSD? Lyme dis... (read in full...)
He's a lovely person and I want to get to know him better, so what should I suggest for a date?
Q. So my brother in laws best friend who he's known since primary school has asked me to go out with him to join them all far a meal. Last time he was out, he was pretty drunk, but we were dancing with each other. He started talking to me via social n...
A. 10 September 2015: I think getting to know him by going out with him and people who know you both is a good idea.
Why would you think he just wants sex? He asked you out on a group date.
Enjoy getting to know him, go out on group dates and suggest one-on-o... (read in full...)
I learned his native language but I feel underappreciated for my efforts! How do I broach this subject with him?
Q. My partner of over a year was born and raised outside the UK, and moved here for work. He is perfectly fluent in English, and we have no problems communicating in it. He took me to meet his friends and family in his home country, saying that I ...
A. 10 September 2015: I remember reading a piece of advice in a parenting article somewhere, that the best way to encourage strong self-esteem and personal initiative was not to continually praise the child, but rather to encourage the child to find the pleasure in ... (read in full...)
How can I get over this silly, school girl crush?
Q. Hi there. So I think my friend has feelings for me, and it's kind of a sticky situation because he's not only my friend, but my boyfriend's friend as well. I'm in a happy relationship of 3 years with a wonderful guy who treats me well. He has a b...
A. 10 September 2015: Do you think it's possible that this silly, school girl crush on a guy who doesn't have a bit of a temper problem, who is incredibly sweet and has more in common with you than your boyfriend even after 3 years with your boyfriend, might be a sign ... (read in full...)
Am I a fool for falling in love?
Q. Did I do the right thing, I turned around an walk away, without saying a word, I was seeing this gal for three months, fell head over heals in love, her ex beat all the time, she was going through therapy, for the abuse, when he got out of jail, she ...
A. 10 September 2015: After three years, I think it is time to find a new angel to spend your precious time and energy on. You already know she's chosen poorly, so you shouldn't compound that by hanging on, right?
You're not a fool for falling in love. Could you be a fo... (read in full...)
He said the only thing that works for him is porn and now I don't want to have sex with him either! Any advice?
Q. My boyfriend and I(both 22) started dating a year ago. I think that we both have a rather high sex drive and at the beginning sex was great. Unfortunately we had to go LDR for a few months and he started using antidepressant medication. W...
A. 10 September 2015: It's very sad to be told by your lover who presumably is at the peak of his sexual drive that he can only get off with porn. That's heartbreaking.
This site http://yourbrainonporn.com has some good information on how internet porn availability is a... (read in full...)
Am I losing my man friend to this new woman?
Q. I have a very dear male friend who I have known for about a year now. He helps me a lot with jobs around my house and we go out together for days or evenings. About 6 months ago he asked me for a relationship and I said no, I don't fancy him ...
A. 10 September 2015: You've already said no to a relationship, you mention the age difference and the only reason you're considering entering telling him you've changed your mind is because you are jealous of her.
Perhaps the kind thing to do, and what I rather hope... (read in full...)
I haven't heard from him for 9 days, any suggestions?
Q. Hi I've been dating a guy for three months now. We see each other once or twice a week - its been all lovely and he tells me how interesting, fun to be with, and beautiful I am. He always asks me for the dates. We haven't talked about bei...
A. 9 September 2015: I think you sound like you've been handling it well, I don't hear you being overly keen here.
As you aren't exclusive, is there a possibility he's seeing other women and perhaps is getting closer to another one? Yes, I know you are on FB and can ... (read in full...)
What message should I send with a bouquet of flowers?
Q. There's a girl that lives in my village that I like, she's been kind of seeing a player, from what I've heard on the grapevine, he's unreliable and just likes to party. anyway, I'm a pretty romantic kind of a guy, that's just how I am, and I'm ...
A. 7 September 2015: Do you have an outcome you expect from the gesture of sending her a bouquet of flowers?
This is really iffy as you don't know if she fancies you at all.
I had a man send me a huge bouquet of flowers to me once and it completely fell flat because ... (read in full...)
What's the the right form of contraception for us?
Q. Hi there, Me and my fiance are struggling a bit to find the right form of contraception! We've been together for four years and for about three of those we've been using the withdrawal method. We've never really been too worried about preg...
A. 7 September 2015: Here's a comprehensive run down of available contraceptive methods: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control/
Talk to your doctor about your choices but as you've ruled out the more common methods you may find it a struggle to find an e... (read in full...)
He owes me over $5000 US and he's full of excuses and says he can't live without me. What should I do?
Q. I am a British expat in Asia. I met my current boyfriend in an Asian city. He was unemployed so I let him live with me rent free and I also paid for everything: food, his clothes, watch etc, basically everything. He had promised that from the ...
A. 6 September 2015: It is time to cut your losses and move on.
Go to an Al-Anon meeting to hear about how people deal with alcoholic family members/partners.
Change your passwords on everything ASAP and move your remaining money to a new account.
See about sublet... (read in full...)
A question about spenders, why does he expect me to fund him?
Q. Why cant my boyfriend understand that every time he spends his money that he cant account for and comes back picking for a fight when i have little cash of my own to spare, that this creates a problem for me. I am not well off and probably have less ...
A. 6 September 2015: So did you work out why he was expecting you to fund him? And how to manage his expectations?... (read in full...)
I'm a little uncomfortable with her fetish!
Q. Hi there! i have just found somthing out about my girlfreind that i did not know. We have been together for going on six years now. sex has been good, just lately my missus(Sarah) has been having problems becoming aroused and sexually moist. And she ...
A. 6 September 2015: How are things going? Were you able to integrate the fetish into your sex life? Hope all went well.
... (read in full...)
Could she be sleeping with other men, or intending to do so?
Q. My long term friend with benefits recently told me that she needed some space, and she was emphatic that I respect her wishes. Here's the confusing part: we still have sex a couple of times a month, and when I do leave her alone she will reach out ...
A. 6 September 2015: Any updates?... (read in full...)
A question about spenders, why does he expect me to fund him?
Q. Why cant my boyfriend understand that every time he spends his money that he cant account for and comes back picking for a fight when i have little cash of my own to spare, that this creates a problem for me. I am not well off and probably have less ...
A. 18 August 2015: Why can't he understand that your budget can't absorb his demands?
There are a couple of possibilities.
He's very selfish and only thinks of himself.
He's rather ignorant, can't be bothered with maths and assumes that you will take care of him ... (read in full...)
I'm a little uncomfortable with her fetish!
Q. Hi there! i have just found somthing out about my girlfreind that i did not know. We have been together for going on six years now. sex has been good, just lately my missus(Sarah) has been having problems becoming aroused and sexually moist. And she ...
A. 17 August 2015: I find it astonishing that she's been able to have sex with you for 6 years and only recently struggles with arousal, and that it's taken her this long to clue you in to the fetish. It doesn't seem honest of her, you know?
I guess you will have to t... (read in full...)
Could she be sleeping with other men, or intending to do so?
Q. My long term friend with benefits recently told me that she needed some space, and she was emphatic that I respect her wishes. Here's the confusing part: we still have sex a couple of times a month, and when I do leave her alone she will reach out ...
A. 17 August 2015: So she's not your girlfriend or date, right? You state outright that she's a friend with benefits.
So, I think now that you realize that this set up doesn't serve you and you are having problems with the status quo, then it's a great time to end ... (read in full...)
| *isha-1's friends
These are mutual friends, so *isha-1 has
added them and they have added *isha-1!
|