A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello,do women ever regret, going back, with a abusive ex after being with a nice guy, an do they ever think about the nice guy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (12 September 2015):
 I take it you are the nice guy wondering why nice guys finish last? Well they don't they finish first because they end up finding a woman worthy of giving back all that it is that you have to give. Unlike the one that got away wasting her time trying to tame the wild beast, this unbeknown to her is what you call a meaningful relationship.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2015): Careful how you generalize and pluralize "women;" as if this encompasses them all. Only a few you, many other men, and myself have had our life-experiences with. After a series of bad experiences, cynicism forces us to stereotype.
You've only dated so many women, and witnessed so many incidents in the lives of other men. You didn't take a scientific survey. It's impossible.
I'm gay, but also dated women prior to coming to terms with my true orientation. So, when I offer advice; I've had similar experiences to draw from. Or, I was smack-dab in the middle of a situation someone else experienced. Just an innocent by-stander, or first-hand witness. Maybe the good Samaritan on the side of the road. I've saved a lot of women from themselves and their bad choices, my friend.
I may not want sex with them, but I love them all the same.
The bad-guy usually damages her self-esteem. His narcissistic influence over her emotions eventually will destroy her. She will believe she is unworthy of love, and
will often settle for less than she really deserves. He will eat at her self-confidence and beat-down any resistance until she is vulnerable and easier to manipulate. These guys are well-practiced and good at it.
Some women want to take on the challenge of taming them.
They come out scorned, get revenge, but they come out damaged nonetheless. Drama queens feed on the drama; so they invite this crap into their lives simply for that.
The bad-boy knows how to take control, and people mistake that for strength. It is only the power of manipulation and ability to use intimidation to rule over those who are weaker. That's all it is. He's macho, over-confident, brutal, and mean. Stupid women see this as what men are suppose to be like. They think you're weak, or gay if you're not. Speaking in general. Or, they fear you'll think they're not good enough; and you will dump them for something better. It's a symptom of of post-traumatic stress from a series of bad-boys. Some are sadistic, and go back for more. Go figure.
I'm a nice guy. I've been dumped, toyed with, taken advantage of, and used. By both men and women. I was younger, but now I'm the wiser. Your question is obviously rhetorical. But a common-sense answer is obviously...yes! They may or may not live to regret it. That doesn't mean they won't repeat it. That is, if they happen to survive it! Most of us, male and female, learn from it. Grow stronger, and make wiser choices.
Gender aside...don't we all regret playing with fire? We've got to feel the heat; before we know how it burns.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (11 September 2015):
 They do this all the time.... BUT, they're too stubborn to admit it.....
Why do you ask?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2015): Maybe. This is too general of a question in my opinion. It depends on the individual, the circumstances surrounding it, etc. But yeah, especially if you were good to them, I'm sure the would regret it someway some how, but it's hard to tell because some women (like men) but up this fasad to save face. Good luck! I have been there and I know it hurts really bad but hey, what can you do?
You know? Just move on, she ain't even worth it. Just chalk it up to a lesson learned.
Source: Other people, nice people, smart people
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (11 September 2015):
 A woman who is stuck in a cycle of abuse probably doesn't think too much but getting through the next 10 minutes or hour on how to stay alive or uninjured.
So if you are feeling badly that she is trapped in a cycle of abuse and didn't choose you, I think the healthiest thing for you is to decide that yes, she will regret it, even if she doesn't now, and move on with life.
If you are stuck in a repetitive cycle and can't move on yourself, then perhaps it's time to find a counselor to work through the outcome of the relationship with this woman.
What are you hoping to hear? If it is that yes, some women regret it, I'm sure some do.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2015): Listen to this mate, women have been known to pine for a nice guy for up to ten years and still to hold a torch for them long after that.Women dont really like bad guys, they just lose their confidence and start to believe that even a nice guy would treat them badly because thats what they see.They cant bear the thought of he nice guy being like that so they keep mr nice in their head like a permanent salvation ..but would be heartbroken if said nice guy turned out to be nasty..kinda like out of the frying pan into the fire and yes,those burns hurt like sin.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (11 September 2015):
Never had time to find out...already moving on from the past, and looking for a better woman in the future.
If someone left you for someone else...why are you wasting your time thinking about them? If someone hurts me, I don't go back for round two. Never ever. One pain is enough for me to learn.
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