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I've added some new quotes today (but also kept the earlier ones below)
And the next two quotes are from a wise Uncle on this site called BrownWolf http://www.dearcupid.org/people/brownwolf
“I very thankful for the ounce of common sense I have...because sense is not that common. :) “
"Stay away from foolish people; they have nothing to teach you."
That quote about foolish people from BrownWolf is so true. A weak person cannot be trusted. With a strong person you have more certainty, they are not afraid to stand up and be counted when they are needed.
And I especially like BrownWolf's first quote above on common sense and so I asked BrownWolf for permission to replicate it here. BrownWolf then generously offered the second quote, above, as well.
When you meet a person for the first time, then imagine they are facing their biggest challenge ever:
With this mind-set it reminds us to be kind and use empathy because we can never truly know the extent of personal challenges a person is currently facing.
Badgering a person and humiliation with unreasonable demands for "I have to know" is more likely to harm than help. We do not "have to know". Be kind. Listen carefully and remain supportive. Then the person will willingly reveal more and feel safe to reveal more again.
We can never assume that things are much easier than things are for ourselves.
It encourages one to listen carefully and employ empathy in our dealings with others.
In life we face many things. But with each challenge we can grow a little stronger. When you meet a person with great strength of character it is possible that they grew that strength as a result of some very tough obstacles and some personal tragedies.
Never underestimate such a person.
Strength does not imply brutality nor cruelty and often not even physical strength.
A truly strong person will never seek to harm another. They know their strength and they know that kindness will move mountains more easily than brutality.
Then there is one of my favourites: Sun Tzu.
The wisdom of Sun Tzu is still as fresh as the day he wrote it 4000 years ago:
“A leader leads by example not by force. “
And now some less well known quotes:
“It is much more valuable to look for the strength in others. You can gain nothing by criticizing their imperfections.”
by Daisaku Ikeda
“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”
by Maya Angelou
“Challenges are what will make us stronger.”
by Zainab Alsaati
Respect other people's feelings. Even if it doesn't mean anything to you, it could mean everything to them. (quoted by many, but generally considered to be by 'unknown')
'As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.'.....Andrew Carnegie
I also respect the Chinese idea of "face" - there is no need to humiliate people. It demeans the one doing the demeaning. there are better ways to call a person to account with dignity. Focus on the Issue when there is a problem rather than be accusatory to the person
'Spilled water is hard to regain' (fù shu nán shou)
"Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt,
kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate." .....Albert Schweitzer
'A sunny disposition is worth more than fortune.
Young people should know that it can be cultivated; that the mind like the body can be moved from the shade into sunshine'. .Andrew Carnegie
"We will not be remembered by our words, but by our kind deeds." ... Author Unknown, from A Great Life Lesson
“It always seems impossible until it's done.”... Nelson Mandella
"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .....Mother Teresa
"Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people. A nation does not have to be cruel to be tough." .....Franklin D. Roosevelt
'Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results.'...Andrew Carnegie
what's your favourite quote?
But all is not sweetness, kindness and light in this complex world.
There really are afflicted and inadequate people in this world who get their pleasure from deliberately trying to hurt others.
They do this out of an inflated sense of their importance in the scheme of things. They feel entitled to be mean to others. They have become arrogant over the years.
Yet they are not the strong individuals they think they are. Instead they are passive aggressive bullies.
There are those afflicted with traits that are so petty and unkind that one wonders what has happened to make them that way?
Their arrogance will not allow them to step back and get help for their afflictions.
Instead, like a bull in a china shop, they just keep on head butting harder and harder, using the same tactics they've been using for years to try to get their own way.
What traits cause the problems for such insecure arrogant persons with an inflated sense of entitlement?
Here are a few of the afflictions that continually cause problems in their relationships:
Negativity?
Passive Aggression?
Being Hate filled towards those they see as ''less'' than themselves = everyone?
Envy
Jealousy
For those afflicted with those horrible traits all I can feel for these tormented souls is pity that they are beset with such inadequacies and negativity.
The traits result in them concocting a lie that they are the victims, when in reality they are instead the bullies, the overly judgmental and nasty arrogant persons who enjoy hurting others.
Just feel sorry for them and their inadequate responses.
Then go forth and find things to enjoy in life. Find the positive, find ways to be supportive and kind to others. It is win win in every way on all sides.
Turn your back on cruel unkind and bitter people. Leave them to scheme alone. Their negativity causes their faces to betray their bitterness within.
Their hearts harden and they wonder why others can be so unaffected by all their schemes to hurt others. They are the losers who think their nastiness towards others is justified. |
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How do I build a relationship with my mom?
Q. i feel like my mom and i have no relationship what so ever! i feel like there is nothing i can talk to her about!! i've tried sitting down with her, tried writing her letters, i've even tried facebook messaging her, but nothing seems to change!! ...
A. 24 April 2012: If your Mother and you do not have a good relationship and you are committed to wanting one, then perhaps a counsellor working with you and your Mom can help you all to identify what are the issues preventing a better connection?
Perhaps your Mom... (read in full...)
What are the confidentiality rules in U.K. schools?
Q. I've just found out I'm pregnant! I'm 16 and I'm really happy because I was trying for a baby. My form tutor at school has somehow figured it out and keeps asking if I'm pregnant. I'm reluctant to tell her because I dont want the information getting ...
A. 24 April 2012: This is good to involve your Mom. I do hope it all goes well.
If you feel the depression ever resurfacing then try something like this one below, or any of the other links mentioned earlier.
http://www.befrienders.org/helplines/
Regards
Abel... (read in full...)
What are the confidentiality rules in U.K. schools?
Q. I've just found out I'm pregnant! I'm 16 and I'm really happy because I was trying for a baby. My form tutor at school has somehow figured it out and keeps asking if I'm pregnant. I'm reluctant to tell her because I dont want the information getting ...
A. 24 April 2012: As a post script, though this is important. What sort of counselling did you receive to get over the grief of losing your first baby? Losing a baby is tough. You would have gone through some of the stages of grief. Hopefully you would have been ... (read in full...)
What are the confidentiality rules in U.K. schools?
Q. I've just found out I'm pregnant! I'm 16 and I'm really happy because I was trying for a baby. My form tutor at school has somehow figured it out and keeps asking if I'm pregnant. I'm reluctant to tell her because I dont want the information getting ...
A. 24 April 2012: Hi
You sound strong and resolved for the path you have chosen.
Just be aware that it will not be easy and that it is OK to ask for help, seek help and make use of help.
You Mom may have her own issues that she is grappling with.
If your M... (read in full...)
What are the confidentiality rules in U.K. schools?
Q. I've just found out I'm pregnant! I'm 16 and I'm really happy because I was trying for a baby. My form tutor at school has somehow figured it out and keeps asking if I'm pregnant. I'm reluctant to tell her because I dont want the information getting ...
A. 23 April 2012: well done for visiting the clinic and taking the folic acid. Please take good care of you. At 16 you may feel confident about the future and all it holds.
But it is uncharted territory and I do hope you can reach out for far more support as I thin... (read in full...)
What are the confidentiality rules in U.K. schools?
Q. I've just found out I'm pregnant! I'm 16 and I'm really happy because I was trying for a baby. My form tutor at school has somehow figured it out and keeps asking if I'm pregnant. I'm reluctant to tell her because I dont want the information getting ...
A. 23 April 2012: Thank you Cerebus for the heads up on the Doctor confidentiality. I will keep that in mind. Your advice is always soundly based. ... (read in full...)
What are the confidentiality rules in U.K. schools?
Q. I've just found out I'm pregnant! I'm 16 and I'm really happy because I was trying for a baby. My form tutor at school has somehow figured it out and keeps asking if I'm pregnant. I'm reluctant to tell her because I dont want the information getting ...
A. 23 April 2012: Schools may vary. But teachers do often talk amongst themselves. So once a "secret" is shared then it is often no longer a Secret.
Your Tutor though does sound very supportive.
You should not be showing until you are around three to four mo... (read in full...)
I really hate being the first born!
Q. I've always hated my birth order. As the first born your parents always rule you with an iron fist. But with the younger siblings they ALWAYS treat them differently no matter what. As the first you always have to be responsible and cautious. Yet ...
A. 19 April 2012: On the plus side you should have received the most attention and studies claim that the first borns are likely to be smarter. You are also likely to be responsible, reliable and someone others can rely on.
You were the first child in the family and ... (read in full...)
He makes promises that he doesn't keep....
Q. Dear cupid, I've been dating my current boyfriend for 9 months now. I love him he knows that and I know that he loves me too! My only problem is he makes promises but does not keep them, I'm having 2 kids from my past relationship and he said he ...
A. 16 April 2012: ?'lopartner'????
What was I thinking?
That was supposed to say: loving partner.
I am sure most of you realized that:)... (read in full...)
He makes promises that he doesn't keep....
Q. Dear cupid, I've been dating my current boyfriend for 9 months now. I love him he knows that and I know that he loves me too! My only problem is he makes promises but does not keep them, I'm having 2 kids from my past relationship and he said he ...
A. 16 April 2012: hi
You are very welcome. Work on valuing you. You do deserve good things in the future. Like an honest reliable lopartner.
Because you know you are a Great Mom, a Good person, and a Responsible Parent.
Best Wishes,
Abella... (read in full...)
He makes promises that he doesn't keep....
Q. Dear cupid, I've been dating my current boyfriend for 9 months now. I love him he knows that and I know that he loves me too! My only problem is he makes promises but does not keep them, I'm having 2 kids from my past relationship and he said he ...
A. 16 April 2012: When I hear about a charming glorious good looking man who has entwined a lovely lady with his magic and yet has no real long term plans my heart goes out to that lady.
And you do it tough. You have two children to bring up. Schooling is expensiv... (read in full...)
I don't think my husband is cheating but we don't have sex very often - he says he is too tired from work What should I do?
Q. I don’t think that my husband is cheating (though he has before - and so have I) but we don’t have sex very often. My husband and I are both in our middle 40's and sex began to slow down somewhat a few years ago. We usually have sex two or three...
A. 16 April 2012: I do not think he is cheating either.
But I do think he is in need of a thorough check at the Doctors. Blood tests, cholesterol anything else the doctor wants to check.
Yes, I think your husband is finding the rosters difficult and financia... (read in full...)
Husband of 20 years suddenly going to strip clubs. What is up?
Q. My husband of twenty years has recently started to go to strip clubs and bars while out of town for work. His work buddies have lots of stories to tell that involve the other guy doing something wrong but not them. They have each blamed the other ...
A. 13 April 2012: He's been your husband of 20 years. You are comfortable together. You know everything about each other. Everything is OK. Money is not a problem. Sex is not a problme. There are no secrets.
Well there were no secrets.
When was your husband ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's daughter is trying to come between us
Q. Hi, I'm 31yrs and I'm dating a man who is 50yrs. We have a great relationship between us but he has 2 daughter one is my age and the other is 2 years younger than me. the older one has no problem with us being together. But the younger one is always ...
A. 12 April 2012: hi
Wow she is seriously threatened by you. Put a answering machine on your phone and record every incoming call. Screen your calls this way so she is reduced to only leaving messages.
Then you have the messages as proof of her nastiness.
If your g... (read in full...)
Do I confront my wife about her cheating or just file for a divorce?
Q. i have discovered that my wife of six years is having an online affair,as if thats not bad enough the third party involved mentions in his emails about my children being as his own children and says they will all be together as a new family soon,i ...
A. 12 April 2012: Dear MrJade
She sounds really underhand.
Do not confront her. She had kept you out of the loop, no need to brief her on your intentions.
Get advice.
In the future you are going to need additional support with your MS so make sure that this ... (read in full...)
Is it weird that I'm turned on by my girlfriend's sex toys?
Q. Hi everyone, I’m just wanting to get a bit of perspective on something, it's not an issue per say, I just wanna make sure I’m not weird in my behaviour. Ok so basically my girlfriend and me have just started living together and she has brought ...
A. 12 April 2012: In a loving mutually enjoyed relationship where you and your girlfriend delight in each other's company, then how can it be wrong to get turned on by seeing how exuberant and excited your girl friend is?
It is not weird at all.
When she sees you... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's daughter is trying to come between us
Q. Hi, I'm 31yrs and I'm dating a man who is 50yrs. We have a great relationship between us but he has 2 daughter one is my age and the other is 2 years younger than me. the older one has no problem with us being together. But the younger one is always ...
A. 12 April 2012: She is a very unhappy girl. Maybe she has been like this a long time. Her mean spirited manipulative actions cannot be counteracted in a short time. I pity her children if she would use them as pawns against her own father.
But her father still se... (read in full...)
Event Etiquette Help Please! Husbands event vs. Baby shower?
Q. I'm in a slight bind here. Looking for some wisdom regarding event etiquette. Ok, which event should i attend? My fiance and I area marrying in September. Part of the premarital requirement is going through the sacrament of confirmation which ...
A. 12 April 2012: In the old days etiquette was that the invitation you accepted first was given priority.
But then there is also precedence. And in the scheme of things his event is far far more important to him and to your future. To not attend would be a huge... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's ex is buying him gifts and its making me jealous and uncomfortable
Q. Hey guys, I have a little "situation" on my hands, as I'll call it, and I was wondering whether or not I'm overreacting by being bothered by this. Anyway, on to the story... I am currently in a relationship with a man who has a child from ...
A. 12 April 2012: She is starting to flatter and woo your guy (her ex) as I think she wants him back. Surprises? Something special? Yes I think she is going too far. And yes I would be downright disappointed if he lets this get out of hand. I assume he likes gifts. ... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend going into chat rooms?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for half a year, I love him a lot, he's my everything, but lately things have seem weird, he's on vacation, he has been gone for 1 week, since then, things have seem down, we used to dirty talk everyday, via text, ...
A. 12 April 2012: At the very least he is testing the waters and exploring. Bit like someone running their fingers over the candle flame to see if they can handle it and get away with it.
Sadly I think you both need a heart to heart. If he is getting bored or he d... (read in full...)
I'm getting turned on by much younger painter. Am I gay? I was married!
Q. Hello, i'm a 42 year old male and something has happened that has confused me and even shocked me a little. Ok, a bit of background... A couple of weeks ago, during the unseasonal fine weather we had in the UK i employed a young lad (18) to do some ...
A. 12 April 2012: Are you perhaps lonely and in a rut? He is nearby, and you have missed out on company for ages.
He offered you friendship. It is also good business for him to catch up with you from time to time - he may have already noticed some more things that... (read in full...)
How can I trust that she has moved on from ex's habits or she is just pretending for my sake?
Q. I have a wonderful girlfriend, and things are going really well between us. A few years ago, she came out of a bad relationship where the guy she was with would insult her, call her 'stupid', a 'whore'- that sort of vile language, and slapping...
A. 11 April 2012: Ask any domestic violence victim - violence often starts slow. I am looking at the progression.
A slap might seem playful but it still startled you.
The next time might be verbal sarcasm. That is still mean.
If it gives her pleasure then the nex... (read in full...)
Boyfriend uses cocaine and is physically abusive. Can I help him in any way? Or just forget about him?
Q. I Have been dating my boyfriend for a year now. I know we love each other very much he never cheated. The only problem is he smokes cocaine now and then and he has a lot of friends which makes him very aggresive when he has done it. He even hit ...
A. 11 April 2012: If he will accept and come to realise that cocaine will ruin his life - and that he will need more and more to get high - if he can face this reality then he will seek help to get over his addiction.
But while he refuses to accept that he needs... (read in full...)
I loved her with all my heart and she turned me down
Q. Hi everyone. It has been almost 5 months since she left me for someone else after a relationship of 3 years when I came to USA forever. Of course like everyday of my relation with her, on my departure day, I again told her that I loved her so much, ...
A. 11 April 2012: I sense that this first girl duped you and tried to make out she was one thing when really she was nothing of the kind.
Your sense of betrayal must be horrible. How nasty and mean, of her. Good thing you now know more about her nasty side. Imag... (read in full...)
I can't believe he's flirting with other girls again!
Q. I'm pretty upet at the moment because my boyfriend used to flirt with girls on facebook telling them that they looked sexy, and that they were gorgeous e.t.c, I was was not happy with this behaviour as it made me feel awful, and like he didn't ...
A. 11 April 2012: Does he want a girl friend and a committed relationship or does he want to be single and a bit of a lad?
it sounds like he is feeling restricted and is chafing at the bit a little.
He does not sound like and nor is he acting like a man who is c... (read in full...)
How can I trust that she has moved on from ex's habits or she is just pretending for my sake?
Q. I have a wonderful girlfriend, and things are going really well between us. A few years ago, she came out of a bad relationship where the guy she was with would insult her, call her 'stupid', a 'whore'- that sort of vile language, and slapping...
A. 11 April 2012: No No No No. She should not resort to violence. Assault is not loving. It is abusive.
Yes there are people who enjoy hurting other. That is not you
Maybe she has been on her ‘Sunday best’ behaviour while she got to know you. Maybe she still ge... (read in full...)
Went against my friends advice and now she won't talk to me. Any advice pls?
Q. I've had a falling out with one of my close friends. Well I'm not sure, the other night me and her went out and I guy who I know was there too. Me and this guy always text and stuff and that night we kissed. Anyway at the end of the evening I told ...
A. 11 April 2012: It is none of her business who you spend your time with. What does she have against this guy? Is there something about him that she knows and is not telling you?
Her behaviour sounds controlling. She does not own you and she should not be call... (read in full...)
He walked out after a fight. Don't know what to do? Wait? or not Wait?
Q. I'm feeling a bit lost right now. My boyfriend and I have been going out for over a year. We've had our share of ups and downs and it has been on and off over the last 12 months. The reason why I am feeling lost right now is because of a rece...
A. 11 April 2012: It is wonderful that you have so much love and acceptance and a huge capacity for understanding each other. But sometimes that is not enough.
And if he resolves things (from his point of view) by spitting the dummy and just walking out then tha... (read in full...)
I keep comparing myself to my BF's attractive female friend and its making me insecure about myself! Help please?
Q. I am 20 y/o and my bf is 23. We have been together for about 2 years now, and everything is generally good. I just can't seem to get past this one thing that happened a few months ago.... He has this friend. She is beautiful, they have known each ...
A. 11 April 2012: What girl would not feel a bit insecure with his attitude? His remark was insensitive and lacking in empathy. So he likes the other girl? What is he waiting for?
Yet he would not like to lose you. Well he should start celebrating that he has you ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but it really bothers me that he is so mean to my kids! Am I wrong to feel like this?
Q. My boyfriend of 4 years has 3 kids. One is 25 and lives at home, the other is 23 and has 4 kids and him and all the kids stay there on weekends. His daughter lives with her mom. We do not spend the night at each others homes (due to my kids being...
A. 11 April 2012: If this were me he would be history this instant. My own kids are important. They are not second class citizens. Kids pick up on covert signals of disrespect and disinterest.
But this nasty mean old bully calls your children stupid and fat. Be Gone... (read in full...)
He helped me through my divorce but I don't think this relationship is working, should I tell him straight and leave the relationship?
Q. I've divorced my controlling husband after 20 years. I've met this man and he helped me while I went through my divorce. I know from start he is not right but he persuade me to give it a go as he is 16 years older than me. Two years on Im 51 and ...
A. 11 April 2012: There are times in our lives when a person comes into our life for a reason. And after the issues are worked through we can become a changed person. In two years you have no doubt grown and changed. Divorcing your husband after twenty years must ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend makes comments when I speak to my family just because he has no contact with his!
Q. Dear Cupid, My boyfriend doesn't have any contact with any of his family. I'm not sure why, I have tried to talk about it but he avoids the subject. The trouble is he makes comments and remarks when I speak to mine and I'm getting sick of it. I have ...
A. 11 April 2012: Your family is not his family. But maybe he thinks all families are the same. Or he may be jealous of your family who are close to you.
Making comments is very unkind and his own insecurity means that he might be seeing your family as comp... (read in full...)
Is it best just to stay away from my abusive mother?
Q. I am just writing this for some advice regarding my 68 yr old mother. I am a 46 mother of two and grandmother of one. -ever since i can remember my mother has always put me down - and is constantly nasty. If i ever question her ways she just replies ...
A. 10 April 2012: Your Mom may just be a nasty woman, or she may be in the early stages of dementia / alzheimers. If the latter your Mom may need a close eye kept on her as her symptons will only get worse. And she will need monitoring by her Doctor. If this illness ... (read in full...)
I think I smothered her. How do I get her back?
Q. i'm really into this girl. she's recently had a rough break up (was abused), but i didn't know anything about that before i met her a couple of months ago. we flirted on fb quite a bit, now i feel like i've smothered her (she barely responds). how ...
A. 10 April 2012: oK, thanks, that makes it easier. She was abused previously so that does make her more vulnerable and more wary. Plus her recent break-up. And yes she may not have felt comfortable about some aspect of your flirting. You don't know her well enough ... (read in full...)
Is it just sex or more?
Q. i have been having sex with a guy for about 2yrs now.. in the begining he and i was jst hooking up... 2yrs later... i am soo much in love... i dont think he feels the same way. he probably likes me... or does he jst like having sex with me. he ...
A. 10 April 2012: don't be falling for his manipulations. He already knows what the gist of the email is. He is just try to manipulate you and try to dump guilt on you.
He is an adult.
He can cope with this news - though he does not want to accept it as truth.
... (read in full...)
He stood me up. I thought he only liked me as a friend. Did he think it was a date? I'm so confused!
Q. I say "friend" because he's a guy that I used to work with, and we get along pretty well, but we've never actually done anything outside of work. I kind of have a crush on him, but I have no idea if he likes me. After this incident, I'm even more ...
A. 10 April 2012: Very very rude of him to stand you up. That was mean and nasty. Unless he was very ill, in traction in hospital then at the very least he should have phoned you.
Is he so disorganised that he just forgot?
His excuse was flimsy and unconvincing... (read in full...)
Is he a player or hes just confused like me?
Q. Ive been seeing a guy for three months now. We live in different ciuntry and he visits my country for business once or twice a month and stays for two weeks or so. I planed to keep things casual but I think Im getting attached to this guy a littl...
A. 10 April 2012: This one is potentially tough on you. Many men in a country (short term) that is not their home country have no trouble starting a relationship with a girl – knowing it will never become a long term thing. He only visits once or twice a month. And ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant with triplets and found out through text messages that my fiance is planning on leaving me to be with my cousin. Do I confront him?
Q. well where do I start... Hmmm I know well let's start off by saying Im 20 years old and 5 months pregnant with triplets. Thats right 3 kids all at once. Don't get me wrong I am excited for my little ones to get here but.... I'm going through ...
A. 10 April 2012: First of all you need to take care of your health and your future. And keep calm. And keep stress to a minimum. So I would rule out a confrontation at this stage. If it is inevitable that he is leaving at least he is showing you his character sooner ... (read in full...)
I slept with my husband's friend. I don't know what to do now
Q. I have been married for six years to my husband and we have had problems in our marriage, i was starting to feel unsecure because everytime we fought he would threaten to leave. I started to get to know my husbands friend and felt he was attractive, ...
A. 10 April 2012: Your husband threatening to leave when you have problems is emotional blackmail and such behaviour would wear thin very quickly.
Though the man you call your husband’s friend is no real friend of you husband. Not any more.
It is fine to sometimes... (read in full...)
I'm dating a guy but want to try things out with a girl
Q. so i am a 18 year old in a happy relationship with my boyfriend for 10 months and were perfect together! but i have this yearning to be with a girl and try it out. i dont want to break up with him and i know he would not go for a three some because ...
A. 10 April 2012: If you are honest with him about this then it may be enough to make him consider breaking up.
If you do not tell him and he finds out later then the trust will be affected, perhaps forever.
Before you take this big step I am pleased that you are ... (read in full...)
Am I getting myself into an affair?
Q. Hi.. am 20 yrs old and I am in a relationship with a girl for about 2 yrs. Everything was very normal until another girl came into my life. I met her 6 months back and we became very close. My girlfriend kws about me and my friend. 2 days back my ...
A. 10 April 2012: You cannot keep two girls on a string. And you should step back from both girls and reconsider your position. Your girlfriend of two years hardly needs to be constantly undermined by Miss 6 months.
And Miss 6 months may be one of those girls who ... (read in full...)
I think I smothered her. How do I get her back?
Q. i'm really into this girl. she's recently had a rough break up (was abused), but i didn't know anything about that before i met her a couple of months ago. we flirted on fb quite a bit, now i feel like i've smothered her (she barely responds). how ...
A. 10 April 2012: How old is she exactly? Two years is of no consequence when you are older but is a chasm when you are younger.
And an accurate age makes it easier to give you an accurate answer.
As she has broken up recently and she is about to graduate then I s... (read in full...)
I think I smothered her. How do I get her back?
Q. i'm really into this girl. she's recently had a rough break up (was abused), but i didn't know anything about that before i met her a couple of months ago. we flirted on fb quite a bit, now i feel like i've smothered her (she barely responds). how ...
A. 9 April 2012: Are you close enough to see her face to face regularly? Do you run into her occasionally or does she live nearby? If you do then keep it light. And stay cool. But try to make her feel comfortable in your company but don’t push too hard. Show an ... (read in full...)
Is it just sex or more?
Q. i have been having sex with a guy for about 2yrs now.. in the begining he and i was jst hooking up... 2yrs later... i am soo much in love... i dont think he feels the same way. he probably likes me... or does he jst like having sex with me. he ...
A. 9 April 2012: He does not seem to want this relationship to develop beyond the holding pattern that satisfies him.
This is a giveaway that he sees no long term future in the relationship. Other than a convenient relationship for him to provide him with a sexu... (read in full...)
Is it just sex or more?
Q. i have been having sex with a guy for about 2yrs now.. in the begining he and i was jst hooking up... 2yrs later... i am soo much in love... i dont think he feels the same way. he probably likes me... or does he jst like having sex with me. he ...
A. 9 April 2012: Very sadly I do think it is all about the sex for him.
He is not respectful towards you. He turns up late and wasted. He is preventing you from moving on. And you are generous and accomodating towards him.
Whereas he does no more than the minimum ... (read in full...)
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