Why did he give up his trip with the boys?
Q. My boyfriend turned down a golf trip with the guys next weekend. It's out of town and they go every year. He said it's because he knows I worry and he doesn't want to upset me. In the past I have given him grief. Many of the guys go to strip club...
A. 19 June 2017: He did not want to hear it this year around, you said it yourself you give him grief about it and he knows you don't like it. He probably thought it was not worth enduring just to spend time hanging around in a hotel room or worrying you. There is ... (read in full...)
I changed my mind about having children, he wants children would this be the end of our relationship?
Q. Hi everyone, this one is a difficult one for me. I recently got engaged to a man I love and think the world off, the time we been together we have had minor disagreements, but other than that the relationship has progressed smoothly. Lately I have ...
A. 17 June 2017: It does seem like you have planned things to the last detail, I can respect how much though you put in to it, having children is certainly not an easy task.What I do find worrying is the fact that you might not comprehend life doesn't always go as ... (read in full...)
Is it possible for a virgin to contract a PID?
Q. Hello, I'm in my thirties and I got married about two months ago and my wife is 27. My wife told me she's a virgin,that she didn't have sex in her previous relationships but I opened up to her that I've had sex before. On our first night, she...
A. 7 June 2017: As far as vaginal sizes I wouldn't know. But I assume just like penises vaginas come in different sizes so maybe hers is slightly wider than the girth of your penis and vice versa. Not everyone's genitals perfectly fit together like a lego piece. ... (read in full...)
My FWB wants me to stay the night while his GF is away. Does my FWB expect something different? Or the same?
Q. So I've been seeing a FWB guy since we were both 17ish. Its been nearly 10 years and its a continuing thing, never stopped for either of us. But we have both in and out of relationships and we still do it on the DL. Just wondering i guess if...
A. 7 June 2017: Could this arrangement be the reason why you are both in and out of relationships still? After 10 years of continuously sleeping with one an other I find it difficult to believe no lasting bond has formed between the two of you. Are you afraid h... (read in full...)
Is my perfectionist boyfriend overly critical of my looks? Or am I oversensitive?
Q. My bf used to think my looks were perfect. But he seems to put me down lately. Like he doesn't like a birth mark on my nose. I can't control that. He tells me that my body is perfect for a woman my age but that I am not 20 anymore. He sa...
A. 6 June 2017: How come he has this critical eye for your "imperfections" but not his own? I call this ugly insecure man syndrome.(pretty self-explanatory) he landed a beautiful woman like you and now his confidence is through the roof. So his comments about l... (read in full...)
Is it possible that there actually isn't anyone out there for you?
Q. Is it possible that there actually isn't anyone out there for you? I can't imagine finding anyone who suits my needs, I rarely see anyone who I would like to date. There must come a time when you finally meet someone who is trustworthy and ...
A. 25 September 2016: people aren't created specifically to fit with other people like a lego piece. Relationships take compromise and a lot of work because you have to change and adapt. they are more like play-doo ( following the toy analogy ).
you have to mold your... (read in full...)
Is it selfish if I get mad at my boyfriend's appearance and silly behavior?
Q. Is it selfish if I get mad at my boyfriend's appearance and silly behavior? Once he joked about we're having budget marriage with other bridegrooms in a ballroom. He also joked about the pressure of marriage in front of my friends. He said marriage ...
A. 25 September 2016: Doesn't seem like you agree on the basic things. you have a different mind set and neither of you have respect for one another.
Now you reset him because he doesn't look or act the way you want him too. why are you together?... (read in full...)
Am I crazy or is this gaslighting?
Q. Am I crazy? My husband has the habit of lying to me about little things. For example, he'll say he has nothing planned for the weekend and the weekend will roll around and he'll tell me that he has to go to work (and he does- I can verify that and ...
A. 25 September 2016: This is not where near gaslighting, He is just trying to avoid an argument and stupidly thinks that lying is the due course to take and he can't just see that it is making it all worse.
Why would your husband having to work weekends upset you thou... (read in full...)
I have a great relationship and love him but want to be single
Q. Hey! First of all thanks in advance for any questions! I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years and 7 months. No breaks or anything in between. We generally have the most amazing relationship. We have everything in common, I find him...
A. 24 September 2016: That is the stress of having so much on your plate right now! you have a lot going on and the last year in Uni can be extremely stressful.
However the uncertainty will not go away, you have being committed most of your young years ( I can rela... (read in full...)
Is my partner setting things up to look for a fight?
Q. My partner is very forgretful. He puts his phone down and forgets where and says he cant find it. Then he pushes up the stress by indirectly accusing me or someone else of taking it. Then he gets aggressive and abusive to me, telling me I get...
A. 24 September 2016: I wouldn't know if he is doing it on purpose, it certainly sounds like gaslighting, very dangerous behaviour. Gaslighting often times involves constant false accusations, blow hot and cold on a person, sudden mood changes that and refusing to give ... (read in full...)
Fiance lied about her age
Q. I've been with my fiance for 2.5 years and we are legally getting married in 2 weeks. When filling out the paperwork i noticed she kept writing the wrong age. It was only a year difference but later that day she told me she us actually a year older ...
A. 24 September 2016: As someone that works in hospital dealing with people from all over the world I have seen it all. plenty of people from non western countries that were born in small villages haven't got the faintest idea what their birthday is. They do not pl... (read in full...)
Is it me? My Gf of 4 years just doesn't make any effort. Leaving me seriously unsatisfied
Q. I am really frustrated in my relationship. My girlfriend of 4 years I feel doesn't make effort. Or maybe it's me? We used to have a lot of sex, nearly daily. As routines changed this has reduced which is normal. Now in a week it's once and if I wak...
A. 24 September 2016: The fact is you see sex as a treat for you and going out to eat and socialising is her treat. that might just be the root of all your problems ! Sex is your thing ain't it? is it one of the few things you guys do together that you actually enjoy? ... (read in full...)
I'm having doubts that my fiance loves me
Q. I feel as though my fiancée is not in love with me anymore because our whole relationship has changed. We use to make love with no problem but now it seems like a complete drain for her. I do everything for her with all my love in heart but I am ...
A. 23 September 2016: Usually when something becomes a chore is because you don't enjoy doing it, so the question is, why isn't she enjoying sex or not as much as she use to.
either way this is not a sign of love, if this is the only change there is in your relation... (read in full...)
Husband constantly nagging and critiquing
Q. My husband is constantly nagging and correcting. He is a generally likeable guy but when he gets close to somebody like wife or kids he critiques all the time where it sounds verbally abusive. He sees very little wrong with himself. He has a lo...
A. 23 September 2016: He has a martyr complex, It seems pretty common behaviour on the spouse that ends up taking care on the home or at least taking on a more active role around the house.
The person ends up victimizing themselves, wondering how everyone would co... (read in full...)
He's married and much older.... and I've a serious crush on him. what advice can you suggest for me?
Q. Hi. So i'm sure this has been discussed countless times, but i still feel the need to get my situation out there and hear your opinions on it... So i have this guy in my life, he's my trainer of sorts, and i see him a couple times a week. He's way...
A. 23 September 2016: He has fallen for you, this isn't going to end well by any means. you are way to young to get evolve in a gigantic cluster mess like the one about to unfold.
sometimes closeness sparks feelings. There are feelings involved here definite... (read in full...)
Unexpected break-up. Can anyone give me any advice? Advice from guys would be much appreciated.
Q. Me and my boyfriend were together for nine months and I was so happy. Suddenly, he broke up with me on Monday and I don’t understand why. He said he thinks we’re not suited and have different life experiences but I don’t understand how this can...
A. 21 September 2016: Bypassing all the unknown problems, I feel i should say this ( I could be wrong ) but! there is absolutely no point on trying to salvage a relationship with someone unreliable and with fly risk tendencies. how do you know that if you guys get bac... (read in full...)
Should I just block this guy?
Q. I am in my 40s and did ask a question previously on here about this man who I had seen at our local coffee shop. The background I used to see him at my local pub but not to talk to many years ago and then he ended up moving to the same village that ...
A. 21 September 2016: unmitigated creep, he doesn't know what he wants. it does seem like he wants a secret affair the type that entail him calling you randomly when he is home alone to have quick sex and then pretending you guys don't know each other in public.
I mean... (read in full...)
I've fallen for my FWB and she doesn't feel the same. Advice?
Q. So I am constantly conflicted and torn. I have fallen in love with my friends with benefits. I never could have seen this coming. I'm not the relationship type and it really is kind of the last thing that I want. We have been sleeping togethe...
A. 3 June 2016: Talk about commitment with her, see how she feels about it. You already know she is attracted to you, I mean she likes you that is clear. so your choices are simple, don't tell her and keep your relationship the way it is right now the only ris... (read in full...)
I'm turned on by a fantasy I'm sure my wife's interest in would be zero!
Q. Hi All. I am a very happily married man and my sex life with my wife is fantastic. However, I am hugely turned on by the thought of a threesome between my wife and a shemale. I am almost certain that my wife's interest in this is pretty much zero. ...
A. 1 June 2016: When you Google the word fantasy! it literally says things that take place in your imagination, why don't you leave it there and keep it between you and p*orn hub?... Just leave your wife out of it, Might save you your marriage!... (read in full...)
He said I was 'the one' but I found out he has a girlfriend
Q. my ex and I have been having a fling for a couple years, I had hopes and though it would lead us back together. he would say I love you but I don't want to settle just yet but when I do your the one. I always had the impression we were very clo...
A. 24 May 2016: It is quite clear to me that you were not just having a fling. He was but you were not, you were emotionally involved and he used those feelings to string you alone. He acted like a piece of garbage and he did it consciously, this is one of those ... (read in full...)
I don't mind paying but resent being asked to
Q. Dear Cupid: I was on an on-line dating site. A man sent me messages saying he would like to meet me. We met at a place he picked, I told him I was good with just a drink (no food). I had one beer (it was happy hour), he picked up the tab which wa...
A. 24 May 2016: Yes! completely understandable. I don't like the burden on me either, I think it is more thoughtful and light hearted when you offer to pay instead of having someone tell you it is time for you to pay them back for what was supposed to be a nice ... (read in full...)
His friends don't make me feel welcome. How can I deal with this situation?
Q. Hi All, I'm having this uneasy feeling about a situation, theres nothing I can do about it but wait for it to pass. And then hopefully it'll just be a forgotten memory. The situation is that my boyfriend (of 5 years, of which 2 years living t...
A. 23 May 2016: Did I read this correctly? he and this other guy are getting the business because they have girlfriends? is this girl getting married receiving the same grief for getting a husband? now to the important part, why is your boyfriend so comfortable w... (read in full...)
Should pull her aside and ask her to refrain from further comments on my body or my weight?
Q. Last year I lost the weight that I gained in winter time. One of my co worker congratulated me and said I look great and not to lose anymore. However, now almost every time I see her she always makes a reference to my weight and tells me that I'm ...
A. 23 May 2016: Why don't you just be blunt with her? yet keeping it light and playful?
tell her not again, we are talking about my weight again?. this is all you talk about everytime we meet. there is a whole bunch of other things to talk about. come on! make a wh... (read in full...)
I am about to have sex with my new partner, and don't want to scare him off!
Q. I've been seeing a great guy for some time now and we're about to start having sex. I'm in my late thirties (he's of my age), divorced after 15 years. Almost half of my marriage the sex was... well just going through the motions before becoming...
A. 23 May 2016: Wait till you are sexually intimate a few times to bring up the list of concerns. ( you said that, that's a good call). I think you are getting ahead of yourself, you don't know if all you need to enjoy sex again is a great emotional connec... (read in full...)
Why are some people so critical of open relationships?
Q. So I am letting my fiance have sex with another woman (who herself is in an open relationship) next week. They have already had a date and kissed etc. It's the first time he will have sex outside of our relationship. Rationally I am pretty ok wit...
A. 18 May 2016: people disagree with everything, everyone has a difference of opinion, if we didn't we wouldn't have all the problems we have in society, gay marriage wouldn't have taken so long to be legalised. when something stands far away from what the en... (read in full...)
I'm disappointed with my girlfriend's weight and health, any suggestions?
Q. So we've been going out for a few months with this girl and in the beginning, we promised each other that we'll make lifestyle changes. I used to drink quite a lot before her and also smoked quite a lot. She was overweight (she should lose at l...
A. 18 May 2016: to address your last point.
See your mother wanted your father to stop drinking, and he wanted to stop drinking that is why it worked.
the reason why the same technique isn't working for you is because your girlfriend lacks the desire to see chan... (read in full...)
I'm disappointed with my girlfriend's weight and health, any suggestions?
Q. So we've been going out for a few months with this girl and in the beginning, we promised each other that we'll make lifestyle changes. I used to drink quite a lot before her and also smoked quite a lot. She was overweight (she should lose at l...
A. 18 May 2016: It is clear from what you wrote, that she is not ready to change, she seems happy with her eating habits and is reluctant to exercise. why? there is no why. she just isn't, people make promises of changing all the time, but it is next to impossible ... (read in full...)
Should I speak to my Aunt beforehand about re-establishing contact with my mother? I do not want my sons to see, hear or experience any nastiness over any reunion
Q. When I was 22 I started dating a friend of my fathers he was 18 years older then me and my parents didn't accept our relationship. They thought he "groomed" me and that he was using me for sex. Things got really bad between us and they told me...
A. 16 May 2016: I'll say call them, speak to your mother she seems to be the one who has come to her senses, start from there, met her up for a coffee without the children or your husband, start of by rekindling and getting close again, you seem very mature and ... (read in full...)
He only sends me a text when he's horny. Is it time to show him the door?
Q. me and my boyfriend have dated over 7-8 months now. Over the past 2 months it's so happening that he only texts me when he's horny.. Otherwise he never texts me nor speaks to me. so like i'm really confused. should i continue my relationship...
A. 16 May 2016: He does not sound like a boyfriend, sure no one is perfect but this isn't a personality flaw or a little quirk, it sounds like a great deal of calessness and disinterest from his part.
Is he never curious to see if you are ok...? not even a little... (read in full...)
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