Like what
she writes?
... Add *bella to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *bella a private message | | | *bella's profile:"Always be Kinder than necessary"... J M Barrie
I've added some new quotes today (but also kept the earlier ones below)
And the next two quotes are from a wise Uncle on this site called BrownWolf http://www.dearcupid.org/people/brownwolf
“I very thankful for the ounce of common sense I have...because sense is not that common. :) “
"Stay away from foolish people; they have nothing to teach you."
That quote about foolish people from BrownWolf is so true. A weak person cannot be trusted. With a strong person you have more certainty, they are not afraid to stand up and be counted when they are needed.
And I especially like BrownWolf's first quote above on common sense and so I asked BrownWolf for permission to replicate it here. BrownWolf then generously offered the second quote, above, as well.
When you meet a person for the first time, then imagine they are facing their biggest challenge ever:
With this mind-set it reminds us to be kind and use empathy because we can never truly know the extent of personal challenges a person is currently facing.
Badgering a person and humiliation with unreasonable demands for "I have to know" is more likely to harm than help. We do not "have to know". Be kind. Listen carefully and remain supportive. Then the person will willingly reveal more and feel safe to reveal more again.
We can never assume that things are much easier than things are for ourselves.
It encourages one to listen carefully and employ empathy in our dealings with others.
In life we face many things. But with each challenge we can grow a little stronger. When you meet a person with great strength of character it is possible that they grew that strength as a result of some very tough obstacles and some personal tragedies.
Never underestimate such a person.
Strength does not imply brutality nor cruelty and often not even physical strength.
A truly strong person will never seek to harm another. They know their strength and they know that kindness will move mountains more easily than brutality.
Then there is one of my favourites: Sun Tzu.
The wisdom of Sun Tzu is still as fresh as the day he wrote it 4000 years ago:
“A leader leads by example not by force. “
And now some less well known quotes:
“It is much more valuable to look for the strength in others. You can gain nothing by criticizing their imperfections.”
by Daisaku Ikeda
“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”
by Maya Angelou
“Challenges are what will make us stronger.”
by Zainab Alsaati
Respect other people's feelings. Even if it doesn't mean anything to you, it could mean everything to them. (quoted by many, but generally considered to be by 'unknown')
'As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.'.....Andrew Carnegie
I also respect the Chinese idea of "face" - there is no need to humiliate people. It demeans the one doing the demeaning. there are better ways to call a person to account with dignity. Focus on the Issue when there is a problem rather than be accusatory to the person
'Spilled water is hard to regain' (fù shu nán shou)
"Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt,
kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate." .....Albert Schweitzer
'A sunny disposition is worth more than fortune.
Young people should know that it can be cultivated; that the mind like the body can be moved from the shade into sunshine'. .Andrew Carnegie
"We will not be remembered by our words, but by our kind deeds." ... Author Unknown, from A Great Life Lesson
“It always seems impossible until it's done.”... Nelson Mandella
"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .....Mother Teresa
"Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people. A nation does not have to be cruel to be tough." .....Franklin D. Roosevelt
'Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results.'...Andrew Carnegie
what's your favourite quote?
But all is not sweetness, kindness and light in this complex world.
There really are afflicted and inadequate people in this world who get their pleasure from deliberately trying to hurt others.
They do this out of an inflated sense of their importance in the scheme of things. They feel entitled to be mean to others. They have become arrogant over the years.
Yet they are not the strong individuals they think they are. Instead they are passive aggressive bullies.
There are those afflicted with traits that are so petty and unkind that one wonders what has happened to make them that way?
Their arrogance will not allow them to step back and get help for their afflictions.
Instead, like a bull in a china shop, they just keep on head butting harder and harder, using the same tactics they've been using for years to try to get their own way.
What traits cause the problems for such insecure arrogant persons with an inflated sense of entitlement?
Here are a few of the afflictions that continually cause problems in their relationships:
Negativity?
Passive Aggression?
Being Hate filled towards those they see as ''less'' than themselves = everyone?
Envy
Jealousy
For those afflicted with those horrible traits all I can feel for these tormented souls is pity that they are beset with such inadequacies and negativity.
The traits result in them concocting a lie that they are the victims, when in reality they are instead the bullies, the overly judgmental and nasty arrogant persons who enjoy hurting others.
Just feel sorry for them and their inadequate responses.
Then go forth and find things to enjoy in life. Find the positive, find ways to be supportive and kind to others. It is win win in every way on all sides.
Turn your back on cruel unkind and bitter people. Leave them to scheme alone. Their negativity causes their faces to betray their bitterness within.
Their hearts harden and they wonder why others can be so unaffected by all their schemes to hurt others. They are the losers who think their nastiness towards others is justified. |
|
| Latest articles: Self Confidence - an easy step by step guide to help you develop self confidence.
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
23 June 2013: SELF CONFIDENCE I started writing an answer to a question, namely http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-boyfriend-wants-me-to-change.html and my answer just grew and grew. I recognized it had become an article rather than an answer after I ex...
Answer number 1200000 has been posted. Achievements on dearcupid.org. Who will ask question number 300,000 on this site?
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
22 December 2012: One question this week, a few days before the end of the year 2012 on DearCupid.org has reached a real Zenith. A milestone. And a great achievement for the site dearcupid.org. Poster called CMMP has penned an answer and it is answer number 1200...
Cheating, Players, Betrayal and Trust issues. Should a Player or a Cheat be forgiven? - a collective resource on these issues, with some great responses that may help you.
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
16 September 2012: CHEATING Today the feature topics are Players and cheating and Trust issues or can you Forgive or should you forgive if your partner Cheats? And the collective wisdom on DearCupid.org on Cheating on Betrayal, Loss of Trust and Forgiveness or n...
22 Great Articles from Great Aunts and Uncles on this site. Can you add to the list? Do you have a favourite article on DearCupid?
This question has 28 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 August 2012: Articles written by other Aunts and Uncles on DearCupid. Which ones are your personal favourites and which ones helped you the most? I often find it hard to find the best articles on DearCupid. I know there are some great articles on the site, bu...
How do you feel about nick-names in a loving relationship? Do you have a favorite nick-name?
This question has 16 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 November 2011: Does your loved one give you nick names? Or a nick name? And which one do you love the most? I think nick-names can be a barometer of a relationship. If the nick-names stopped happening then I would know there was a problem, even if nothing had been ...
What are the attributes and conditions for a successful relationship that works? And what hinders the development of a successful relationship?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 August 2011: I would be intersted to hear from others on what attributes and qualities represent essentials in a successful relationship. And what are deal breakers that can ruin a relationship? By a successful relationship I mean one where both parties a...
Where is the world going? And yes this does affect relationships.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
21 March 2011: "Where is the World going? And yes this does affect life and relationships." The original question received from an anonymous female in the UK aged 26 to 29 and called "Where is the UK going" inspired this article. And you might think this does ...
Tunnel vision positive thinking - used to your advantage
This question has 10 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 December 2010: Life is never perfect. Even people, who look like they have it easy, still have challenges. Maybe different challenges to people doing it much tougher, but challenges all the same. That's when it's much harder to feel positive. Even if we cou...
Coping with bereavement of losing your love to suicide
This question has 15 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
4 December 2010: You can rebuild your life after some very close has died. But you need to do it at your pace. It certainly made me face life without rose colored glasses. And it opened my eyes to the fact that some people do not have honorable intentions. I am ...
|
I think I smothered her. How do I get her back?
Q. i'm really into this girl. she's recently had a rough break up (was abused), but i didn't know anything about that before i met her a couple of months ago. we flirted on fb quite a bit, now i feel like i've smothered her (she barely responds). how ...
A. 10 April 2012: oK, thanks, that makes it easier. She was abused previously so that does make her more vulnerable and more wary. Plus her recent break-up. And yes she may not have felt comfortable about some aspect of your flirting. You don't know her well enough ... (read in full...)
Is it just sex or more?
Q. i have been having sex with a guy for about 2yrs now.. in the begining he and i was jst hooking up... 2yrs later... i am soo much in love... i dont think he feels the same way. he probably likes me... or does he jst like having sex with me. he ...
A. 10 April 2012: don't be falling for his manipulations. He already knows what the gist of the email is. He is just try to manipulate you and try to dump guilt on you.
He is an adult.
He can cope with this news - though he does not want to accept it as truth.
... (read in full...)
Am I getting myself into an affair?
Q. Hi.. am 20 yrs old and I am in a relationship with a girl for about 2 yrs. Everything was very normal until another girl came into my life. I met her 6 months back and we became very close. My girlfriend kws about me and my friend. 2 days back my ...
A. 10 April 2012: You cannot keep two girls on a string. And you should step back from both girls and reconsider your position. Your girlfriend of two years hardly needs to be constantly undermined by Miss 6 months.
And Miss 6 months may be one of those girls who ... (read in full...)
I think I smothered her. How do I get her back?
Q. i'm really into this girl. she's recently had a rough break up (was abused), but i didn't know anything about that before i met her a couple of months ago. we flirted on fb quite a bit, now i feel like i've smothered her (she barely responds). how ...
A. 10 April 2012: How old is she exactly? Two years is of no consequence when you are older but is a chasm when you are younger.
And an accurate age makes it easier to give you an accurate answer.
As she has broken up recently and she is about to graduate then I s... (read in full...)
Is she playing hard to get or having trouble with her ex cheating?
Q. Hi ive known a girl for a few months now but we've only had one "date"--she was with someone at the time we met--and i havent seen her for a couple of months since. She has recently had a hard time becuase this guy she was with has cheated on her. I ...
A. 9 April 2012: Either she already likes someone else or she thought you were too forward too soon. Next time do not push it. She may be shyer than most girls.
If she has suffered a cheating boyfriend then she may be super wary about any relationship at the mome... (read in full...)
I think I smothered her. How do I get her back?
Q. i'm really into this girl. she's recently had a rough break up (was abused), but i didn't know anything about that before i met her a couple of months ago. we flirted on fb quite a bit, now i feel like i've smothered her (she barely responds). how ...
A. 9 April 2012: Are you close enough to see her face to face regularly? Do you run into her occasionally or does she live nearby? If you do then keep it light. And stay cool. But try to make her feel comfortable in your company but don’t push too hard. Show an ... (read in full...)
He's controlling! Should I end things, and if so, how?
Q. I've married for 20 years with an adult daughter. My husband is controlling and I finally have the courage to end my unhappy marriage. Then I met this man 16 years older than me. He is helpful and supportive throughout my divorce. Two years on I ...
A. 9 April 2012: This sounds like a suffocating relationship. It is sad but he is overbearing in his actions. He will not take 'NO' ’or an answer in the bedroom? That is completely unacceptable. Maybe you need to do a course on Assertive training? I think it would ... (read in full...)
How does my friend always get the guy she wants?
Q. How does my friend always seem to attract the guy she wants? We'll be in a club and she'll see a guy she thinks is good looking, instantly her mind set is 'I have to have him'. And I don't know how she does it but she does, the guy always ends up ...
A. 9 April 2012: Confident people do seem to have more fun, that sure is true.
Confidence and belief in you can be developed and learnt. You are certainly correct – guys like confident girls. And girls often fall easily for guys who are very confident.
And this ... (read in full...)
Is it just sex or more?
Q. i have been having sex with a guy for about 2yrs now.. in the begining he and i was jst hooking up... 2yrs later... i am soo much in love... i dont think he feels the same way. he probably likes me... or does he jst like having sex with me. he ...
A. 9 April 2012: He does not seem to want this relationship to develop beyond the holding pattern that satisfies him.
This is a giveaway that he sees no long term future in the relationship. Other than a convenient relationship for him to provide him with a sexu... (read in full...)
Is it just sex or more?
Q. i have been having sex with a guy for about 2yrs now.. in the begining he and i was jst hooking up... 2yrs later... i am soo much in love... i dont think he feels the same way. he probably likes me... or does he jst like having sex with me. he ...
A. 9 April 2012: Very sadly I do think it is all about the sex for him.
He is not respectful towards you. He turns up late and wasted. He is preventing you from moving on. And you are generous and accomodating towards him.
Whereas he does no more than the minimum ... (read in full...)
My parents argue all the time
Q. Hello. Okay parents are fighting whenever they are next to each other and it doesnt matter where? They just fight everywhere even next to my friends. My mom when my dad s out, she s always tellng me an my siblings the bad things about my dad. That ...
A. 8 April 2012: Out of loyalty to you parents I know you probably don't want to talk to a counsellor about the horrible way your parents behave. But if there is a school counsellor you can trust then I would suggest you do try to raise the issues you have raised ... (read in full...)
My parents argue all the time
Q. Hello. Okay parents are fighting whenever they are next to each other and it doesnt matter where? They just fight everywhere even next to my friends. My mom when my dad s out, she s always tellng me an my siblings the bad things about my dad. That ...
A. 8 April 2012: Your parents are out of line. Their fights are between them. They should stop denying that their relationship is in trouble. Clearly their relationship does have issues.
You are being unjustly treated by your Mom. She may not like herself ... (read in full...)
Is thinking of cheating actually cheating?
Q. Is thinking cheating? I had this dream last night about sleeping with my fiancée's friend, it was so hot and heavy! And now today my mind has been wandering. My friend posted a pic of himself nothing new but all of a sudden my hormones are raging. ...
A. 8 April 2012: Some people may say yes. I would say no.
Fantasy in your head is using your creative thinking. All good novelists are very very good of thinking out scenarios that sound great on paper - but may or may not ever happen.
Yes you may be bored bu... (read in full...)
How does a man lose interest so quickly
Q. I began dating this guy and at first I was not into him. He's not that good looking and was a little too clingy too early on. He came on really strong, and I wasn't over my previous boyfriend. So at first I didn't treat him too well... But the...
A. 8 April 2012: He may have been in awe of you at the start, wondering how it could happen. He knows his looks and he knows how successful or unsuccessful he has been in the past with girls.
Maybe you seemed too good to be true.
Looks are not all.
Character and... (read in full...)
He called me unstable!
Q. Dating a man for 6 months, he decided to go back and try again with his ex wife. They are common law 2 teen boys. This is the 4th time they will try again. I was the "rebound" He said he would never go back. So I didn't feel like a home wrecker. I ...
A. 7 April 2012: nice positive follow up - thanks.
And as one door closes, another door opens.
Best wishes, Abella... (read in full...)
Should I try again with this girls?
Q. Ok a while ago i met a girl and we got on well, so i arranged to meet her again for a date. Unfortunately our date was interrupted by one of her friends (a guy) who very annoyingly decided to stay for the whole night. After a couple of hours with ...
A. 7 April 2012: What a rude interfering, selfish guy. He is interested in her and he is none too subtle.
Yes it does seem that she got annoyed at your leaving. She was not honest to you. Her actions since this took place say it all.
However give her one more cha... (read in full...)
He called me unstable!
Q. Dating a man for 6 months, he decided to go back and try again with his ex wife. They are common law 2 teen boys. This is the 4th time they will try again. I was the "rebound" He said he would never go back. So I didn't feel like a home wrecker. I ...
A. 7 April 2012: You sound articulate, responsible and intelligent. With not even a hint of unstable.
what a low life. Sorry, I know you thought it was good but this spineless guy who cannot make up his mind had the nerve to call you unstable? It is one insult too ... (read in full...)
Should I stick to my 'type' of guy?
Q. Throughout my life, I've always been told that I'm pretty, beautiful, and attractive. I'm confident in myself, but not overly confident. I'm not exactly "sexy" or dress like it, but I'm tall and thin with a pretty face. Naturally, I'v...
A. 7 April 2012: Hi Lora
Looks are not everything. And it is not good to judge a person on looks alone. However often people of similar attractiveness are drawn to each other.
At your age I would recommend that you try to evade the overbearing interest of your par... (read in full...)
Is commitment for everyone?
Q. Does there come a point in someone's life where they want commitment rather then sleeping with different people, or can some people go their whole lives living like that?...
A. 7 April 2012: Some people may be able to go through life without a commitment to another. Some may not know what they are missing and have no idea how much better life would be with a kind caring partner. Others might have given up trying. Some may have decided ... (read in full...)
My wife never initiates sex!
Q. My wife and I have a decent marriage, and a one year old daughter. The trouble is, even before she conceived, we rarely had sex (about once a month). Now, it'e even less. When we do, it's good, but every time I initiate she's too tired. Even ...
A. 7 April 2012: First year with a baby? It can be tough. And some aspects of being a new Mom can play havoc with a woman’s sex drive. Not for all. But definitely for some.
Your sex life is definitely not good at the moment. But you will need to take a step bac... (read in full...)
Ho do I know if this online guy is interested?
Q. Ok, I'm pretty sure there's been alot of questions like these but I'm just really stumped. So it's been about two months since I met this guy online who lives an hour away (and trust me, this isnt the first time this happens) and I found him on t...
A. 7 April 2012: Yes he is acting as a friend.
He may lack confidence in himself and he has confirmed he is not good at flirting. However he also may be hoping that you will make the first move. That is lazy. Do not let him get away with that cop-out. If he is inte... (read in full...)
Thankyou Kyle 007
Q. I wrote an article about my son being brainwashed; I would like to write and thank Kyle007 for his lovely advice. I did not know how to personally write to him and let him know how his advice helped, here it is: Dear Kyle, I played the t...
A. 7 April 2012: Could you perhaps post the link to the article you wrote - there are others who might like to read the article in the light of the good advice from Kyle007?
I am presuming you wrote the article in DearCupid.org?
Regards and Thanks
Abella... (read in full...)
I want to get a credit card ...
Q. i would like to get a credit card but i dont want my husband to know, hes a bit controling.... even though we share a bank account or at least i think we do..... would he be alerted if i got one or used it?...
A. 13 March 2012: I am a great believer in asking the Baker if I want bread and the Candle stick maker if I want candles.
So please check out the network site I listed below in one of my previous answers.
And then go to the right official people in your state wh... (read in full...)
I want to get a credit card ...
Q. i would like to get a credit card but i dont want my husband to know, hes a bit controling.... even though we share a bank account or at least i think we do..... would he be alerted if i got one or used it?...
A. 12 March 2012: Although you and your spouse are together it does not mean that your spouse can evade responsibilities to provide adequate financial support for his children.
It seems to me that you do deserve access to a better network of local people who can ... (read in full...)
I want to get a credit card ...
Q. i would like to get a credit card but i dont want my husband to know, hes a bit controling.... even though we share a bank account or at least i think we do..... would he be alerted if i got one or used it?...
A. 12 March 2012: Has your husband ever revealed the actual amount (gross) that he earns and the real income (after tax)
Does he allow you to see the actual utility bills? Does he share the budget with you.
These are normal things any spouse should and MUST sha... (read in full...)
I want to get a credit card ...
Q. i would like to get a credit card but i dont want my husband to know, hes a bit controling.... even though we share a bank account or at least i think we do..... would he be alerted if i got one or used it?...
A. 11 March 2012: if the credit card was issued in your name then they would go after you for the money. And if you could not pay it could affect your credit rating in the future.
And it could allow him to label you with negatives and that would not be nice.
Take ... (read in full...)
I want to get a credit card ...
Q. i would like to get a credit card but i dont want my husband to know, hes a bit controling.... even though we share a bank account or at least i think we do..... would he be alerted if i got one or used it?...
A. 11 March 2012: you have been aware of the money issues in your relationship for some time. So if sharing it here helped you clarify in your mind ways to tackle the money issue then all power to you.
A post paid credit card (as opposed to a pre paid credit card... (read in full...)
I want to get a credit card ...
Q. i would like to get a credit card but i dont want my husband to know, hes a bit controling.... even though we share a bank account or at least i think we do..... would he be alerted if i got one or used it?...
A. 10 March 2012: Hi, you don't need aa credit card, you need an Attorney.
And the end of day whatever you purchase will eventually have to be fully paid for.
Your husband as the sole breadwinner has a responsibility to provide for his children and you.
You need ... (read in full...)
I want to get a credit card ...
Q. i would like to get a credit card but i dont want my husband to know, hes a bit controling.... even though we share a bank account or at least i think we do..... would he be alerted if i got one or used it?...
A. 10 March 2012: there is another type of 'credit card' where you load it up with a set amount of money in advance. And reload it as required. So it operates from then on as a debit card.
And you pay for things using the card, but the card does not then impose addi... (read in full...)
Throwing in the towel is never been an option if you love someone, or is it???
Q. I've been in a relationship for over a year. I moved 700 plus miles to be with this woman. We both come from long marriages with bad ex'es. We both have custody of our boys. Needless to say blending a family is hard. Please tell me if I'm being an ...
A. 10 March 2012: What possible reason is making you feel so cowered that you do everything to gain the approval of this TOXIC and CRUEL woman?
For goodness sake! She will never be satisfied. You could do a million favors for her and she will still be throwing sand... (read in full...)
Is my relationship with my fiancee being impacted by my just diagnosed Bipolar?. My counselling starts end of this month.
Q. I might be diagnosed with Bipolar, and i feel like my relationship with my fiance is at risk! Obviously i get in low and high moods and for the last few months i haven't been my self! My fiance is being wonderful but recently all he's done is stres...
A. 6 March 2012: Hi
Your fiancee, who no doubt you love very much, may be prepared to discover as much as he can about the illness. Or he may choose not to. It does take a lot of love and determination to protect the ones we love. But millions of people all oove... (read in full...)
Is my relationship with my fiancee being impacted by my just diagnosed Bipolar?. My counselling starts end of this month.
Q. I might be diagnosed with Bipolar, and i feel like my relationship with my fiance is at risk! Obviously i get in low and high moods and for the last few months i haven't been my self! My fiance is being wonderful but recently all he's done is stres...
A. 6 March 2012: The best thing for your fiancee is to discover everything possible about the condition. Advance knowledge of how the illness may manifest can allow other family member to give the best support, or to find the best support for you.
This article ... (read in full...)
Is my relationship with my fiancee being impacted by my just diagnosed Bipolar?. My counselling starts end of this month.
Q. I might be diagnosed with Bipolar, and i feel like my relationship with my fiance is at risk! Obviously i get in low and high moods and for the last few months i haven't been my self! My fiance is being wonderful but recently all he's done is stres...
A. 6 March 2012: At least you have your counselling scheduled. Please also visit your Citizen's Advice Bureau in your area to see what other support is available out there for you.
You should also get a family support person to help pressure the NHS to allow you ... (read in full...)
11 weeks pregnant and now my girlfriend wants an abortion because she's "unsure"!
Q. me and my girlfriend have planned to have a baby, we both agreed this was something we both wanted, finally it happened 11 weeks done the line she told me she's un sure about it and has arranged a meeting with the doctor about abortions. what am i ...
A. 6 March 2012: This is very distressing for you, as you thought this was going to proceed smoothly and that you would become a father nine months after conception.
With good support your girlfriend will appreciate you even more. She may decide to keep the baby... (read in full...)
Could this mean I'm gay?
Q. I'm 14 and I do not like porn but I like Yaoi and sometimes I do not know if I'm sick or just gay,...
A. 4 March 2012: The cartoon type of porn you mentioned is often very stylised and unrealistic. So it may be curiousity at this point that draws you to it. Looking at it does not define you as sick and nor does it define you as gay.
While these cartoons often de... (read in full...)
I might as well be single, I'm liviing like a room mate!
Q. Someone suggested reposting to get fresh advice.. so here i am! Hi, My partner who i live with, is addicted to online gaming. Not only that, but when he does deign to spend any time with me, it's generally him wanting to "get it on", he canno...
A. 4 March 2012: Maybe get him talking to AskFrank (based in england) and fantastic. They can get him talking to someone who has overcome exactly what he is dealing with.
But he has to be the one to ask for the help. You can take him only so far, but then he ... (read in full...)
Nearly everything that damages society gets glamourised in some way. Why?
Q. I know I can't change it but I'm not a fan of how society is. I hate seeing people drink their lives away, ruin their bodies with drugs, smoke as much as possible until/through lung cancer, wanting to have sex or wear skimpy clothes at young ages, ...
A. 4 March 2012: and I love the answer from Cerebus too. Well said and on the money... (read in full...)
Nearly everything that damages society gets glamourised in some way. Why?
Q. I know I can't change it but I'm not a fan of how society is. I hate seeing people drink their lives away, ruin their bodies with drugs, smoke as much as possible until/through lung cancer, wanting to have sex or wear skimpy clothes at young ages, ...
A. 4 March 2012: at the highest level it gets glamorized by those who make money out of the things they are selling.
So they try to 'position' it in society as glamorous - hence films in the early days wanting to show film stars smoking.
So the most wealthy ... (read in full...)
Nearly everything that damages society gets glamourised in some way. Why?
Q. I know I can't change it but I'm not a fan of how society is. I hate seeing people drink their lives away, ruin their bodies with drugs, smoke as much as possible until/through lung cancer, wanting to have sex or wear skimpy clothes at young ages, ...
A. 4 March 2012: You are very welcome to have a rant. Ask my family - I do that all the time:)
First off there are too many people who act like lemmings and just do something they have to do to be accepted. This is not true.
I have chosen to never drink alcohol ... (read in full...)
I feel less attracted to my black fiance...and more attracted to Caucasian men!
Q. So its pretty simple I'm mixed black and white. My fiancée is black, lately I have been getting more and more attracted to white men, I'm not racist or anything. My preference has changed and it wouldn't be such a deal, if I didn't feel like I'm ...
A. 4 March 2012: It seems as if you are taking this to be about color, when perhaps that is not the issue. You have a fiancee where your attraction, for what ever reason, is waning for him, as a man.
You may have also met or seen a guy or guys who you felt wer... (read in full...)
I might as well be single, I'm liviing like a room mate!
Q. Someone suggested reposting to get fresh advice.. so here i am! Hi, My partner who i live with, is addicted to online gaming. Not only that, but when he does deign to spend any time with me, it's generally him wanting to "get it on", he canno...
A. 4 March 2012: You are not his mother but this guy only needs a Mom. He is emotionally unavailable for any meaningful relationship. He has no balance in his life. I know teens who are less obsessed with their love of online gaming than your over-grown grumbling ... (read in full...)
Throwing in the towel is never been an option if you love someone, or is it???
Q. I've been in a relationship for over a year. I moved 700 plus miles to be with this woman. We both come from long marriages with bad ex'es. We both have custody of our boys. Needless to say blending a family is hard. Please tell me if I'm being an ...
A. 4 March 2012: I have read a question very very similar to this on Dear Cupid. But I'm not feeling like searching for it, because when I find it I may find out that it is a different person altogether. God Forbid that there are multiple men out there being ... (read in full...)
Abused as a teen. Now I find I am starting to prefer girls. Can I change to become hetrosexual?
Q. ModNote: As the OP was then under the legal age of consent at the time, then the OP, legally, was not able to give informed consent and so was a victim of abuse. If the OP wants this waiver removed please say While under the legal age of consent ...
A. 4 March 2012: Hi
Just give yourself time to explore this option, eg girls.
AnonymouseMale1 has some good ideas on DearCupid.org in his articles on dating.
And these links may help you to seek some further answers that could help you to discover that what y... (read in full...)
Abused as a teen. Now I find I am starting to prefer girls. Can I change to become hetrosexual?
Q. ModNote: As the OP was then under the legal age of consent at the time, then the OP, legally, was not able to give informed consent and so was a victim of abuse. If the OP wants this waiver removed please say While under the legal age of consent ...
A. 4 March 2012: You may or may not have sought counselling. I would recommend it as it is very important that you seek this counselling.
You say you felt nothing, but you may have instead pushed to the back of your mind what you were put through. The impo... (read in full...)
| *bella's friends
These are mutual friends, so *bella has
added them and they have added *bella!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
