| Latest articles: The 'what if' person
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27 April 2016: Hey guys! I'm new here but felt like I wanted to share an experience with you which kind of made me lose sight of who I was. So there is a guy who for the past four years has decided to come in and out of my life whenever he fancies. He sav...
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Does my manager still have feelings for me? Or is it all a game?
Q. Hey guys, So something has been bugging me lately. Also I don't want abuse from anyone - just advice. Last year I was struggling to cope with a personal issue and found comfort from my manager who is married. He used to text me asking if I was ...
A. 27 September 2019: Update: He has also told a manager (one of my close friends) that I was the one who told HIM that I was in love with him.. and aHE had to remind ME That he was married!!!... (read in full...)
How could he move on so quickly?
Q. I ended my relationship with my ex back in February not because we no longer loved each other but because we both had different out looks on life. Realistically it wasn't going to work. I left our house and moved back home. My ex was distraught and ...
A. 11 September 2018: OK. I was just struggling and wanted to stop feeling bitter about it and be happy for him maybe. So asked for advice. Thank you everyone x... (read in full...)
BFcheated and confessed the next day. Do I cut him some slack because of his honesty?
Q. I have been in a relationship for over 4.5 years. Everything was smooth until now. My bf had gone on a vacation and had sex with some random girl. He knew he was doing the wrong thing and wasn't drunk but it still happened. He's still away but ...
A. 21 September 2016: I think you can definitely make this work. He has done a bad thing yes, doesn't mean he will keep on doing it though. He has cheated but some people learn and grow and become a better person after cheating.
It actually makes some couples stronger... (read in full...)
Did he just need some time for himself? Or was my Bf trying to create distance between us?
Q. Would you be upset with your long time BF if you just spent two weeks on vacation and the last two days you had together when you got back back home he did not stay at your place? Instead he went back to his for some "me" time? He could have s...
A. 2 May 2016: I can understand your feelings of being hurt and disappointed by this but try not to take it too personally. A lot of people like and need their own time in a relationship and he might just like his own company. He might have had things he wanted... (read in full...)
Holiday with others and my Bf. How can I get over my fears and actually enjoy this holiday?
Q. I feel really worried about a group holiday that my boyfriend has set up with his friends and their partners. In August, 10 of us are going on a joint birthday holiday for 3 of us the people. It's my boyfriend's birthday, and then one of the coup...
A. 2 May 2016: I think you should try and relax a little. Just be yourself! Don't pretend to be someone you're not just to please them. It's your holiday as well.
Also do you have to all be together the entire holiday? Can't you and your partner have a night to... (read in full...)
Do his actions suggest that he likes me?
Q. I am 13 and my crush and I room windows face each other so like everyone I look out of mine I see him looking out of his and like he'll close it when he see me looking at him and he keeps doing it My question is: does that mean he lik...
A. 2 May 2016: This doesn't particularly mean he likes you unfortunately so don't get your hopes up too much.... (read in full...)
What do I do about this? He doesn’t return the favor!
Q. so here goes... From the ages of 15 (lost my virginity) to 21 I've always had oral sex given to me with out asking (im now 23)...(by boyfriends not randoms) My current boyfriend of two years this september has only gone down on me a hand full...
A. 29 April 2016: I agree with you that it should be equal. If I were to always go down on my partner and he never went down on me I'd be frustrated too. Sometimes if sexual needs aren't met it can put pressure on you're relationship because you can become ... (read in full...)
He thinks I stole his money! I’m so hurt! Should I leave?
Q. Dear cupid I’ve been seeing a man for almost 6 years I’m now living with him he say he lost so I'm money and the first person he blames is me because we are the only 2 people live in the house but his son is always comes in as he please a...
A. 29 April 2016: I'd leave if I were you. I'd be truly hurt if my partner accused me of taking money. After 6 years he should know you inside out - especially if you live together. A key element of a relationship is trust... and he has just proven he doesn't trust ... (read in full...)
Wearing jewelry from an ex whilst out on a date with a new partner... thoughts?
Q. I want to know what everybody's thoughts are on wearing jewellery from an ex partner whilst out on a date with a new partner. Thank you!...
A. 29 April 2016: I don't see the issue here unless it's an old engagement ring or promise ring like the other readers have said.
I've still got old charms on my pandora bracelets from my ex but I've kept them because they are pretty and I like them... not because ... (read in full...)
Our break-up was awkward. Should I get in touch with her, after 2 years apart?
Q. Okay, so here's the deal. Once upon a time, when I was 16, I was utterly and madly in love with this girl who I met through one of my friends. We were in a relationship (officially) for about 6 months and I can undoubtedly say she was the first lo...
A. 29 April 2016: I think if it's bothering you this much after two years then yes you should get back in contact. You just need to be ready for the reaction... It can be either good or bad. She may feel the same way about you which you be great! On the other han... (read in full...)
How should I handle this? Is he being thoughtless? Selfish? Or ?
Q. My boyfriend was supposed to be going to a gig with me. The band cancelled the tour due to illness. Instead promised we would go on a weekend getaway and hinted at engagement. We have been together 2 years and have two kids together and liv...
A. 29 April 2016: Wow I'd be pissed if I were you. Fancy getting your hopes up for a holiday and then turning round and saying you're not going any more!
It sounds to me like he's a bit scared of this whole commitment by marriage thing. That's the only explanat... (read in full...)
Is he using me? People are telling me that he’s a bad person!
Q. I've met this guy a few months, he's really sweet, caring and a respectful gentleman. I really like his personality and he treats me with respect, although I act cold with him, he still treat me in a nice way. I'm not the type of a person who treats ...
A. 29 April 2016: Don't let what other people say cloud your judgement of someone. Allow to see for yourself. With the way you're describing him he doesn't sound like a bad person to me. In this life we meet people that not everyone close to us is fond of. The onl... (read in full...)
Can you change a player just a little?
Q. I'm trying to decide if I should have sex with a guy who's a player. If i don't have sex he'll just ignore me. If I do, then I'll get ignored after...but I was thinking, even if I can't get him to commit, what if I got him to at least do nice things ...
A. 28 April 2016: No trust me quit while you're ahead. I have been in your position before and it just ends up in heartache on your behalf. Once a player always a player deep down I don't care what anyone says. If you catch feelings you'll be the one in the shitter ... (read in full...)
While struggling with depression should I open up now, to him, and risk making things worse for me?
Q. Hi, I've realized that I might be struggling with depression and it's taking a toll on my relationship with my closest friend. He knows me better than anyone and knows that I'm upset and something is happening to me but doesn't know why, and in...
A. 28 April 2016: Yes you should tell him. My sister and Dad both suffer from depression and I'd usually find themselves both cooped up in their rooms alone staring at a wall. That is not how to deal with it. Luckily they both know they can open up to me now as I ... (read in full...)
Can someone help me to understand why I am feeling this way? I haven't told anyone, but I really want a baby.
Q. Hi im almost 14 and i really want to have a baby i love children my sister has 5 and there all babies i babysit them all the time. Their my world. I have a boyfriend but i havent told him or anyone about having a baby. I dont know why i feel like...
A. 27 April 2016: It's completely normal don't worry! I already know what Im gonna call my kids and how I'm gonna decorate their nursery and Im only 21! I can't wait to become a mother but I know deep down I'm still really young and there's a lot of things I want to ... (read in full...)
Should I continue with this relationship? Or break up with him?
Q. Hello Aunts! I'm not sure if I'm in the right relationship. My bf and I have been dating for two years now. Sometimes I feel I love him very much while sometimes I feel I don't love him that much to get married to him. I broke up with him about a ...
A. 27 April 2016: You should definitely break up with him. Unfortunately sometimes you can just fall out of love with someone. It's natural and neither of your faults so don't feel bad!
Just inform him that unfortunately you haven't felt the way he feels about yo... (read in full...)
I always liked girls but I'm afraid I might be gay
Q. Hi everyone ! I would really appreciate some insight as I am clearly confused as to whats going on right now, driving me insane !!! So all my life I have liked girls, I remember plenty of crushes that ive had, from elementary - highschool and my l...
A. 27 April 2016: Hey it definitely sounds like you have HOCD!!! Trust me.. If you were gay you'd know about it! You have HOCD because you don't want to be gay so you're trying your best to convince yourself that you're not. You're over thinking about getti... (read in full...)
Does this sound like a normal close best friends relationship?
Q. I met my current female friend Lucy over 4 years ago thro our children. We started texting each other more and I invited her and her husband round for dinner one night. We took up cycling together to get fit. We meet up 3-4 times per week for 2 ye...
A. 27 April 2016: The friend relationship sounds normal to me. I have girl friends where we text saying 'love you beautiful' etc quite a lot... I peck my bestie sometimes when were out drinking together... And I have a long term boyfriend. It doesn't mean anything ... (read in full...)
How do I approach him about becoming friends with benefits?
Q. Me and my friend enjoy each others company as mates , as of now we are both single were both not looking for commitment and just enjoy life . I'm thinking should i ask him he wants to be friends with benefits , and if i do how do i word this to ...
A. 27 April 2016: Why don't you bring it up in a kind of banter-ish way? Mention jokingly how you're both single and both still have needs... mention how you could be friends with benefits... Then he may react seriously by saying 'actually that isn't a bad idea.' ... (read in full...)
My Bf has secretly been having sex with this woman for more than 6 years. Should he remain friends with her and her partner? I say no.
Q. My boyfriend has been friends with this couple for 20 years. They moved states away a long time ago. They email, talk and text Facebook always. I found out recently that he has been having sex with her for like 6+ years and they have secret ...
A. 27 April 2016: Erm... NO THEY SHOULD NOT BE FRIENDS!!! Is he for real? Has he even noticed that he has done something wrong?! You should really remove yourself from this situation as you will only carry on getting hurt in the long run. If he has cheated on you b... (read in full...)
Am I a rebound? I'm concerned about his continued contact with his ex.
Q. Hi dearcupid, I have been dating a pretty nice guy for the last few months. Everything seems pretty good except I'm concerned about something. I'm not sure if I have a right to be concerned. What I'm concerned about is he is still in frequen...
A. 27 April 2016: I think you have a right to feel this way. I do believe there will still be feelings there between these two. It would really bother me if I was in your shoes.
The fact that he still gives his ex a lot of attention is a warning sign in itself. ... (read in full...)
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