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... Send *bella a private message | | | *bella's profile:"Always be Kinder than necessary"... J M Barrie
I've added some new quotes today (but also kept the earlier ones below)
And the next two quotes are from a wise Uncle on this site called BrownWolf http://www.dearcupid.org/people/brownwolf
“I very thankful for the ounce of common sense I have...because sense is not that common. :) “
"Stay away from foolish people; they have nothing to teach you."
That quote about foolish people from BrownWolf is so true. A weak person cannot be trusted. With a strong person you have more certainty, they are not afraid to stand up and be counted when they are needed.
And I especially like BrownWolf's first quote above on common sense and so I asked BrownWolf for permission to replicate it here. BrownWolf then generously offered the second quote, above, as well.
When you meet a person for the first time, then imagine they are facing their biggest challenge ever:
With this mind-set it reminds us to be kind and use empathy because we can never truly know the extent of personal challenges a person is currently facing.
Badgering a person and humiliation with unreasonable demands for "I have to know" is more likely to harm than help. We do not "have to know". Be kind. Listen carefully and remain supportive. Then the person will willingly reveal more and feel safe to reveal more again.
We can never assume that things are much easier than things are for ourselves.
It encourages one to listen carefully and employ empathy in our dealings with others.
In life we face many things. But with each challenge we can grow a little stronger. When you meet a person with great strength of character it is possible that they grew that strength as a result of some very tough obstacles and some personal tragedies.
Never underestimate such a person.
Strength does not imply brutality nor cruelty and often not even physical strength.
A truly strong person will never seek to harm another. They know their strength and they know that kindness will move mountains more easily than brutality.
Then there is one of my favourites: Sun Tzu.
The wisdom of Sun Tzu is still as fresh as the day he wrote it 4000 years ago:
“A leader leads by example not by force. “
And now some less well known quotes:
“It is much more valuable to look for the strength in others. You can gain nothing by criticizing their imperfections.”
by Daisaku Ikeda
“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.”
by Maya Angelou
“Challenges are what will make us stronger.”
by Zainab Alsaati
Respect other people's feelings. Even if it doesn't mean anything to you, it could mean everything to them. (quoted by many, but generally considered to be by 'unknown')
'As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.'.....Andrew Carnegie
I also respect the Chinese idea of "face" - there is no need to humiliate people. It demeans the one doing the demeaning. there are better ways to call a person to account with dignity. Focus on the Issue when there is a problem rather than be accusatory to the person
'Spilled water is hard to regain' (fù shu nán shou)
"Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt,
kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate." .....Albert Schweitzer
'A sunny disposition is worth more than fortune.
Young people should know that it can be cultivated; that the mind like the body can be moved from the shade into sunshine'. .Andrew Carnegie
"We will not be remembered by our words, but by our kind deeds." ... Author Unknown, from A Great Life Lesson
“It always seems impossible until it's done.”... Nelson Mandella
"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." .....Mother Teresa
"Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people. A nation does not have to be cruel to be tough." .....Franklin D. Roosevelt
'Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results.'...Andrew Carnegie
what's your favourite quote?
But all is not sweetness, kindness and light in this complex world.
There really are afflicted and inadequate people in this world who get their pleasure from deliberately trying to hurt others.
They do this out of an inflated sense of their importance in the scheme of things. They feel entitled to be mean to others. They have become arrogant over the years.
Yet they are not the strong individuals they think they are. Instead they are passive aggressive bullies.
There are those afflicted with traits that are so petty and unkind that one wonders what has happened to make them that way?
Their arrogance will not allow them to step back and get help for their afflictions.
Instead, like a bull in a china shop, they just keep on head butting harder and harder, using the same tactics they've been using for years to try to get their own way.
What traits cause the problems for such insecure arrogant persons with an inflated sense of entitlement?
Here are a few of the afflictions that continually cause problems in their relationships:
Negativity?
Passive Aggression?
Being Hate filled towards those they see as ''less'' than themselves = everyone?
Envy
Jealousy
For those afflicted with those horrible traits all I can feel for these tormented souls is pity that they are beset with such inadequacies and negativity.
The traits result in them concocting a lie that they are the victims, when in reality they are instead the bullies, the overly judgmental and nasty arrogant persons who enjoy hurting others.
Just feel sorry for them and their inadequate responses.
Then go forth and find things to enjoy in life. Find the positive, find ways to be supportive and kind to others. It is win win in every way on all sides.
Turn your back on cruel unkind and bitter people. Leave them to scheme alone. Their negativity causes their faces to betray their bitterness within.
Their hearts harden and they wonder why others can be so unaffected by all their schemes to hurt others. They are the losers who think their nastiness towards others is justified. |
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Fiance had a drink with a business partner despite promising me that he wouldn't touch alcohol till October. Is he a liar? Does he no longer truly love me? Does he not respect me or our relationship?
Q. Hi, i need urgent advice, as i am unsure as to what i must or should do, within my relationship. My fiance has always vowed, that since we fell in love, that he was no heavy drinker, that he was only a social drinker, which is fine, as i am ...
A. 30 July 2015: Alcohol issues can derail things. I think the stress he is under has caused him to use alcohol to mask his grief.
It's about the turmoil inside him.
I think until he gets some professional support he is not in a state where he can even emotiona... (read in full...)
Single Mothers: does it ever get any easier in the absence of your child's father?
Q. This is a question for any single mothers out there: does it ever get easier without your children's father? My problem isn't regarding financial support, but the emotional side of the situation. My son's father has been absent since his birth. For ...
A. 30 July 2015: The hurt that the father is cutting himself off in this way is a cruel rejection of his son.
Stay in contact with your child's paternal grandmother, share some nice photos of your child, with her, and maybe with time the family resemblance will... (read in full...)
Fiance had a drink with a business partner despite promising me that he wouldn't touch alcohol till October. Is he a liar? Does he no longer truly love me? Does he not respect me or our relationship?
Q. Hi, i need urgent advice, as i am unsure as to what i must or should do, within my relationship. My fiance has always vowed, that since we fell in love, that he was no heavy drinker, that he was only a social drinker, which is fine, as i am ...
A. 29 July 2015: I think your guy is under some serious stress that he is not handling well.
When he left his previous job he also left guys who he's known for years and who he thought were his friends. But then they turned on him. That would have been horr... (read in full...)
Long term friend: Do I stop pursuing him, or should I tell him how I feel?
Q. Hello i'm 19 years old. I have a guy friend named “E” who I have been friends and next door neighbors with since I was five up until he had to move out with his parents and siblings across town to live at his grandparents house when he was 10 o...
A. 29 July 2015: Sounds like your guy friend "E" has suffered some very traumatic relocation events and family upheaval in his life.
He may even be a little reluctant to reach out to anyone after all that he has been through.
That he thinks you are "pretty awes... (read in full...)
This is my first serious relationship. I need advice please on my three big questions?
Q. Hi, So my boyfriend and I are going to different high schools this upcoming school year and he's not really worried. He's confident that we will be just fine together. I on the other hand am less worried than I used to be but I'm still worried...
A. 29 July 2015: That was a brilliant answer from AlmightyDuck. So good I don't think it could be improved upon.
Hope the OP found that answering an inspiration as it was full of great tips.
A 5 star winner indeed.... (read in full...)
We have a 6month old baby together. How can I tell him I don't think I love him now, without hurting him?
Q. I am currently engaged and have a six month baby with my partner but I don't think I am in love with him anymore. I love him like a brother, we are buying a house together and I still want to live with him and raise our child, but i don't want a r...
A. 27 July 2015: Having a baby, and all the demands that go with it will normally have a major flow on effect on your whole life.
For a while you can focus so much on the baby that other things can slide.
I never thought I had any depression after one of my pr... (read in full...)
Is my mother an alcoholic and if so what can I do about it?
Q. For at least the past ten years now my mom has been drinking every night. I grew up thinking it was normal (and maybe it is) to have three or sometimes more drinks a night. However, now i'm worried about it. Even when she is sick with the flu she ...
A. 25 July 2015: First Try to get your mother along to her Doctor for a full check up.
You should be on strong ground in that respect as she has been ill. But "sell" it as you being worried about her health and you just need her to do this for her health to get ... (read in full...)
Is it normal not to want to perform oral sex on a man after just having sex?
Q. I love my husband. We are married 8 years and he was my first sexual partner. I was always the prudish type! Not by choice but i think by fact of low self esteem and the fact I probably have no confidence. I have only in the last maybe year or so ...
A. 25 July 2015: Your hesitancy is not uncommon.
It must be tough for some women who never get to experience cunnilingus because their guy refuses to offer that.
Just as it must be similarly disappointing for the guys who rarely if ever get to enjoy fellat... (read in full...)
My fiance promised we'd all move in to his house together. I can't pay the costs and he won't pay. Do I walk away now?
Q. I've been with my partner for 6 years. We got engaged last year. My son and I live with my dad after the death of my mum last year. The plan was to move in with my partner once an extension on the house has been completed as it is currently too ...
A. 23 July 2015: This sounds like a recipe for disaster and financially unwise.
His remarks about it would be ''easier'' if it were just you alone as just horrible. Imagine if you said that to him? Thereby dismissing his daughter as an unwanted emcumberance as he i... (read in full...)
Now my Bf doesn't want to talk. My parents don't want me to date. Any solutions to my dating problems?
Q. Hi everyone, so my boyfriend and I want to hang out.. The problem is that my parents are really old fashioned and don't approve of me having a boyfriend.. So I have hide it from them and when I hang out I have to add some story to my plans to hang...
A. 22 July 2015: I am very sorry that he hung up on you and will not speak to you. He may be insulted to think your parents don't approve of him, despite him being a good student, like yourself.
The Mall issue sounds like you've thought this through. You don't li... (read in full...)
This love-rat LDR guy has been chatting to me for a year. I thought it was a relationship. How do I pick myself up after all this?
Q. Please help! A man I had met online found me on Facebook and started chatting to me. More than ONE YEAR later he left Facebook, started a Twitter account and my whole world has fallen apart. I found him sending sexy comments to a particul...
A. 20 July 2015: Well done. You are looking after you. That is the right thing to do. If it feels wrong, and makes you feel not OK then it is better to be strong and say enough is enough.
You become stronger when you stand up to such shallow behavior (his acti... (read in full...)
How do I tell my Bf to find someone better? I don't think I am good enough for him
Q. I have always had insecurity issues and body image issues since I was younger. Also living in a house with constant mental and emotional abuse can take its toll. However I have a boyfriend and it's close to being a year for us. He is the most a...
A. 19 July 2015: You dear Beautiful girl.
For close to a year you have been the beloved girlfriend of a loving boyfriend who really cares about you and who you think is amazing. I am glad that you are being loved like you have never been loved before.
You really d... (read in full...)
Domestic Abuse: My Story- Part 1
Q. Okay... Well basically I have recently come out of an abusive relationship and I have had a lot of time to sit and reflect on my relationship as a whole, and I have decided I want to share my story of domestic abuse, as an attempt to both educate ...
A. 19 July 2015: Thank you so very much Almighty Duck. That was indeed a very heavy burden put on your shoulders. as I came towards the end of the story I was saying in my head, NO, no, please don't visit the hostel. But I shall just have to be patient until the ... (read in full...)
How can I get over being nervous and initiate the first kiss with my Girlfriend?
Q. My girlfriend and i have been together for about 2 months, we havent kissed yet and i really want to. I mean i've been kissed by other people before but ive never really had to be the one to start it and the other ones just sort of happened...
A. 18 July 2015: Try going slowly so that things are entirely natural.
If she says something you think is lovely as you are saying good night then give her a kiss on her forehead. One brief kiss that is, on her forehead.
Make it brief and keep you lips closed.... (read in full...)
Is it normal that I want to see my girlfriend naked? Should I ask her?
Q. I am 16 and curious to see my girlfriends body. I have been dreaming of seeing her in the nude. I really want to know what she looks like naked. She is so beautiful. I want to ask her, but I want to know. is this normal to ask? Would a girlfrien...
A. 15 July 2015: I think a few cold showers might help bring down your bouncing hormones.
It is not something you should ask. You need to be more patient.
The present if not yet ready to have the wrapping paper removed. The ribbon and the bow can stay on top ... (read in full...)
This love-rat LDR guy has been chatting to me for a year. I thought it was a relationship. How do I pick myself up after all this?
Q. Please help! A man I had met online found me on Facebook and started chatting to me. More than ONE YEAR later he left Facebook, started a Twitter account and my whole world has fallen apart. I found him sending sexy comments to a particul...
A. 15 July 2015: On line dating is very common and people do meet and form a relationship with the help of Skype and all manner of phones and other technology.
I suppose it is the modern day equivalent of using letters or carrier pigeons in the past. In the Vict... (read in full...)
Why is he so commitment phobic? Is he frightened of commitment?
Q. I am a 51 year old women who looks quite young for my age. I work as Air Cabin Crew and also as a college lecturer. I met up with my first love a few days ago after not seeing him for over 12 years. He came to me in a dream and I felt it was a ...
A. 14 July 2015: You have a beautiful romantic crush on this guy and some lovely memories still exist between the two of you.
Plus he has a beautiful heart and is well respected.
If he is in the music business it can be very tough and the time commitme... (read in full...)
How can I build up the strength to NOT go back to him? His behaviour has been inconsistent and confusing
Q. I need some help finding out how to move on from a terrible, emotionally abusive relationship which has destroyed me. I have been involved with a guy for around eight months. When we first got together, he told me he was kind of involved with so...
A. 13 July 2015: Hi
you have lived in the eye of the storm for far too long and it has severely affected your own self esteem.
First off, lean on this group, they are there to help you:
http://www.thehotline.org/
this is the phone number: 1-800-799-7233
The... (read in full...)
I do not want to marry or have children. My mother thinks this is an unhealthy attitide
Q. I am someone who does not want to get married or have children and would like to get some input on others who have made this decision. I am not anti social or anything, but I enjoy being and living alone. I work and have friends and go out occas...
A. 13 July 2015: There are many people who choose to make this choice. And Dearcupid.org has the perfect article just for your situation. It is an article on the subject and may give you some answers you need to see that people do make this choice. I do have ... (read in full...)
Childless by choice: please stop judging us
Q. This morning, as usual, I was perusing the questions on Dearcupid, when I stumbled across a question from a woman regarding her feelings about not wanting a child. Although I gave a comprehensive answer to the question, it touched a nerve with me, ...
A. 13 July 2015: Great article and it is the perfect answer to a poster today. so I am recommending your article to them... (read in full...)
How to play hard to get BUT at the same time be nice to him?
Q. Hi, so there is a guy who obviously likes me. He talks with me for hours, flirts, asks me lots of personal questions etc. He asked for my number in a flirty way. I kind of refused in a cold indirect way. Do you think I should have gave him my...
A. 12 July 2015: Two months? He's the one playing hard to get.
Is this online or in person? Have you met him face to face or only online? Have you tried Skype with him?
If you have not yet met him in person then proceed with great caution.
If you do see h... (read in full...)
He doesn't want his friends to find out that he's going out with me. Why? Why does he limit communication?.
Q. At the moment I am feeling really upset because I'm going out with this boy and he won't barely talk to me, he has got a lot closer to his friend but I doubt that's the problem. He told me that he broke up with his ex girlfriend because she was ...
A. 12 July 2015: It is a seriously negative situation when a guy "won't talk to me at school because he doesn't want his friends to find out that he's going out with me."
If a guy does not want to be seen with you then that suggests that he thinks he can do bette... (read in full...)
Am I over-reacting to my best friend choosing to be a friend to my adopted sister who has left home?
Q. So my adopted sister left home and back-stabbed my family after all we did for her. Now she won't talk to us or anything like that. So I found out that my bestfriend is all besties with her now, and I can't but feel betrayed by my best friend....
A. 12 July 2015: So there is very bad blood between your adopted sister and the rest of the family? Yet your best friend can see some good in your adopted sister.
I wonder what drama has occurred where you feel that your adopted sister "back-stabbed my family a... (read in full...)
My Bf treats me very well. I believe my parents are racist and old fashioned. How can I manage this situation?
Q. I'm 17, and my parents are very intent on me dating inside the race. I think it's stupid and I love my boyfriend. I know I'm young, and I shouldn't be using the word love lightly. But since when did age define your intellect levels, experien...
A. 12 July 2015: From your question I think you are saying that your parents have met your Bf, and subsequent to that meeting they have expressed their feelings strongly that they find him unacceptable.
That is despite how respectfully he treats you. Their ra... (read in full...)
Sex or affection more important? I feel rejected
Q. I'm confused I don't know what's more important affection or sex ? Me and my bf haven't had sex in about a month. I tryed to make the first move than he said no you don't deserve it (we had argued 2 days prior) and this happens frequently he ...
A. 11 July 2015: He really does still care - he enjoys cuddling you in the evening. But he is deliberately withholding more personal intimacy so something is bothering him. He is behaving with callous disregard and disrespect towards giving you loving that involves ... (read in full...)
If my bf really loves me why does he want me to have sex with other partners?
Q. I've been dating my bf since Jan 2015. I'm 18 and he's 35. Big age gap I know but love has no boundary. My family likes him and him and I know very well that we're each other's life partner. However I believe that because of his age he is too le...
A. 10 July 2015: There is some really pertinent and good quality advice herein. Read every answer so far and found all the answers impressive and I do hope that you can see what he's trying to draw you into.
I totally agree with the posters urging you to reth... (read in full...)
Life decisions and at the crossroads: Should I just stay here a bit longer? Or move to the bigger place? Any other possibilities?
Q. I guess mainly people from the UK will relate to this issue as it involves freehold and leasehold property and the situation I've been left in when my alcoholic ex let me down. Sorry if this is long, I don't know how to explain my situatio...
A. 10 July 2015: I am glad that you have some contract work and that you can work from home as well. at best that will keep you going for ten to twenty more years (being optimistic), but then what?
Is the contract work a transferable skill that you would be able... (read in full...)
Married just over a year and since then we argue a lot. What has to happen to resolve this?
Q. I've been married for just over a year now and whilst most of the time things are happy, when my other half and I fight it gets really bad...much worse than it did before we were married. I find when we argue he antagonises me a lot and as a res...
A. 9 July 2015: If you are going to have disagreements then you need to learn to negotiate these issues with more finesse.
If you are fighting "Dirty" then things will only get worse until your relationship becomes toxic. Trouble is you will be then so disencha... (read in full...)
We are both out of work and he says he is aggravated and has issues with his son. Is that enough to cause him to not want sex?
Q. Is it normal for guys to be distant and not want sex when they are stressed? We live together and are both out of work. He is also having issues with his son.He just says he is aggravated. Not sure how to handle this. He says we are around each o...
A. 8 July 2015: His Depression is likely altering the man's outlook. He has his shoulders over-burdened with resentment that he's in this predicament. But there is no excuse for him being dismissive and rude. All credit to you for trying to remain positive.... (read in full...)
Is she trying to bully me? This girl make my life a misery at school. What can I do?
Q. ok, so there's this girl at school who hangs out with us in our group, she's shorter than me but she's a real ****h. she always makes fun of my name, she greets me with a really embarrasing and mean insult. She makes fun of my past (which i don't kn...
A. 8 July 2015: Do wish the powers that be or some billionaire who cares about domestic abuse would fund a permanent site so that everyone can always find Biderman's chart of coercion in the one permanent place
Here it is - the road map of how abusers abuse.
... (read in full...)
After finding my boyfriend's porn stash, I'm worried he wasn't being honest when he said he likes my body!
Q. I'm sorry if there are more questions like this, but I used the search feature and it didn't seem to work. This may seem like a petty issue, but it's making me feel self conscious. I've always felt my body is inferior, considering you always get t...
A. 7 July 2015: Your Boyfriend hasn't settled. He has found the girl he most wants to be with. He goes to great lengths to let you know that the whole you is who he loves.
He likes you and he'd probably be even happier if you loved you as much he thinks you shou... (read in full...)
We are both out of work and he says he is aggravated and has issues with his son. Is that enough to cause him to not want sex?
Q. Is it normal for guys to be distant and not want sex when they are stressed? We live together and are both out of work. He is also having issues with his son.He just says he is aggravated. Not sure how to handle this. He says we are around each o...
A. 7 July 2015: Wonderful comprehensive answer from Aidan.
Your question has touched on an area that I find very fascinating.
Forgive me, but the following is more of an article, to demonstrate how severe economic downturn, coupled with severe psycholo... (read in full...)
My parents will not respect my privacy and I don't know how to respond to their intrusiveness. What can I say?
Q. I am an adult woman who is still currently living with my parents while I'm still in college. My issue is my parents are very nosey and are always wanting to be in my business and I don't really understand why. This has start to become very stre...
A. 7 July 2015: Kendle's advice was spot on.
If you can possibly take Kendle's advice and move out and share it will be a big change. It may not have as much comfort as at home but it sure would beat having people listen in on your phone calls. That is just rud... (read in full...)
Why didn't this man take his chance to take things further?
Q. Why did he lead me on and then vanish? I recently met a man who was 51 on a dating site! He was consistent in his chase, then the spooning pics started and on our 4th date he gave all the signals that he was thinking of inviting me to spend the nig...
A. 7 July 2015: Also: in a meet up like this your role is not to convince him that you're ''good enough'' for him.
Your role is to determine, by his actions, if he's ''good enough'' for you.
By his actions he's already disqualified himself by not being gentlema... (read in full...)
Why didn't this man take his chance to take things further?
Q. Why did he lead me on and then vanish? I recently met a man who was 51 on a dating site! He was consistent in his chase, then the spooning pics started and on our 4th date he gave all the signals that he was thinking of inviting me to spend the nig...
A. 7 July 2015: You were being so accommodating towards this man. Men like to feel that they have to put some effort into convincing the girl to do more.
First mistake was letting him get away with no dinner to discuss things. Dinner can be expensive, sometime... (read in full...)
Was it really my fault? Who was right and who was wrong?
Q. Hi Aunts and Uncles, I had a bad split with a guy for basically seeing another woman while we were on a short 'break'. I know he was free to see whoever he wanted - but I kind of got jealous and told people he was a bit of 'player' for moving o...
A. 6 July 2015: You were feeling very hurt and finding out he'd gone on a date made you angry. You made that remark in haste. Your girlfriends sided with you and you felt justified in saying those words at the time.
That's what can happen when people are hurt and ... (read in full...)
What can and should I do? Feel depressed when my boyfriend isn't around.
Q. I don't know what's wrong with me. Every time I am not near my boyfriend I feel really sad. Borderline depressed. And I don't know why. We are both in our early 20s and have been together for almost three years, we live together and until rece...
A. 6 July 2015: Depression can be evident in people in every community. it is very prevalent and very treatable. It is not your fault in any way that you are depressed, in fact for some depression there is no reason whatsoever. Any part of our body can get sic... (read in full...)
Is it natural for men to openly stare at every attractive woman they see?
Q. hi hope someone can help me with this question I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years we have a 7 month old son together. my problem is he is always staring at other women for example if we are sat on the sofa at home the blinds are open a w...
A. 5 July 2015: It's not that that he thinks you are not the girl for him.
It is that (sadly) he thinks he has a right to satify his wish to ogle.
If he had a more absorbing hobby or activity that needed his concentration then maybe he's spend less time ogling.... (read in full...)
Is it fair to keep some things in your past to yourself and not share them with your partner?
Q. Dear aunts and uncles, Do you think its fair to keep some things in your past from to yourself and not share them with your partner? I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and we are already talking long term. We have a really g...
A. 5 July 2015: I am not going to mess with the cultural aspects. But I also going to try really hard to not impose my culture on your culture.
Because I know that in some cultures something acceptable here can be utterly taboo in another culture.
Clothing ... (read in full...)
My partner seems uninterested in sex. What can I do?
Q. I've been with my partner for 4 years now, and generally our relationship is great, but we do have a problem. I know I have a higher sex drive than he does, but over the last couple of years his just seems to keep decreasing. I can only remember...
A. 5 July 2015: He is very special to you and you enjoy a great relationship it's just making love that's the issue.
But the word ''just'' is really not enough.
You share an intimate loving bond and it is entirely reasonable that you want to celebrate your rel... (read in full...)
Why are you on DearCupid?
Q. Someone asked me via PM "well you are here to help people" And someone else and I got to talking in message about that and I wonder... WHY do YOU post to DC? Are you here to help yourself? (or did you come to help yourself and stayed to help...
A. 3 July 2015: I like this question on dearcupid.org where the Original Poster asked why are you on DearCupid? So I am adding another PS.
This one is from @DearCupid1 on Twitter.com - where what the Aunts of Uncles dispense at dearcupid.org was described as Rand... (read in full...)
Sick of ex's older wife
Q. I have a son who is 6 years old and my ex currently has more custody than I do, I get him every other weekend. My problem is I'm so sick of my ex's wife and really don't want her around my son. For starters she's 46 years old, 10 years older than ...
A. 30 June 2015: Lovely follow up, thank you.
I thought Mystiquek's answer was very kind.
Here is my PostScript message:
Now is your time to shine.
Think up some simple activities that centre solely on just you and your son. Do not be put off if he doe... (read in full...)
Is she trying to bully me? This girl make my life a misery at school. What can I do?
Q. ok, so there's this girl at school who hangs out with us in our group, she's shorter than me but she's a real ****h. she always makes fun of my name, she greets me with a really embarrasing and mean insult. She makes fun of my past (which i don't kn...
A. 29 June 2015: Once again an update as the URL has disappeared again, but I have found the relevant chapter online as a .pdf on bullying.
Just in case anyone reads the update below and finds the link does not work.
well this link does work at the moment re Bi... (read in full...)
Sick of ex's older wife
Q. I have a son who is 6 years old and my ex currently has more custody than I do, I get him every other weekend. My problem is I'm so sick of my ex's wife and really don't want her around my son. For starters she's 46 years old, 10 years older than ...
A. 28 June 2015: Hi
I am a Mom and I can see that you are feeling anxious about losing your connection with your little boy.
And you are correct, you are not the one "on trial".
In this whole issue your son and his welfare is vitally important.
Ch... (read in full...)
Is she trying to bully me? This girl make my life a misery at school. What can I do?
Q. ok, so there's this girl at school who hangs out with us in our group, she's shorter than me but she's a real ****h. she always makes fun of my name, she greets me with a really embarrasing and mean insult. She makes fun of my past (which i don't kn...
A. 7 October 2012: Also, my version of a PS:)
http://www.williamwilkie.com/bullying.htm
download the information on the book “Bullying from backyard to boardroom” on that site above – and in particular read chapter seven = Psychological Abuse In The Workplace... (read in full...)
Is she trying to bully me? This girl make my life a misery at school. What can I do?
Q. ok, so there's this girl at school who hangs out with us in our group, she's shorter than me but she's a real ****h. she always makes fun of my name, she greets me with a really embarrasing and mean insult. She makes fun of my past (which i don't kn...
A. 7 October 2012: Also, and this is VERY important: Do not retaliate with the same bullying behaviour.
Bullies are known for the fact that they often try to goad the victim to react.
They goad and goad and goad and try to get a reaction.
Then they report the r... (read in full...)
Why are you on DearCupid?
Q. Someone asked me via PM "well you are here to help people" And someone else and I got to talking in message about that and I wonder... WHY do YOU post to DC? Are you here to help yourself? (or did you come to help yourself and stayed to help...
A. 2 September 2012: I love answering questions on this site. And I love reading all answers that I have time to read. I especially love the great Articles written by other Aunts and Uncles on DearCupid. As I think good articles are often a distilation of experience.
... (read in full...)
Why are you on DearCupid?
Q. Someone asked me via PM "well you are here to help people" And someone else and I got to talking in message about that and I wonder... WHY do YOU post to DC? Are you here to help yourself? (or did you come to help yourself and stayed to help...
A. 18 February 2012: EyesWideOpen is such a wit, is she not! Seriously though DearCupid.org is a wonderful site. And with the Changes imposed by Google.com it is up to everyone to spread the word about how good this site is. If Google.com is bent on disadvantaging go... (read in full...)
Why are you on DearCupid?
Q. Someone asked me via PM "well you are here to help people" And someone else and I got to talking in message about that and I wonder... WHY do YOU post to DC? Are you here to help yourself? (or did you come to help yourself and stayed to help...
A. 16 February 2012: ps: because I think thousands more people out there could be helped by DearCupid.org - but they have not yet seen the site. And I can only speak for myself. But I feel I may not be alone in this - and that is that often I spend additional time res... (read in full...)
Why are you on DearCupid?
Q. Someone asked me via PM "well you are here to help people" And someone else and I got to talking in message about that and I wonder... WHY do YOU post to DC? Are you here to help yourself? (or did you come to help yourself and stayed to help...
A. 16 February 2012: hi
I came across Dear Cupid by accident. And found it fascinating. I read through some questions and answers started coming into my head.
Then I read the guidelines and criteria and decided it was a really genuine honorable site.
Until I f... (read in full...)
| *bella's friends
These are mutual friends, so *bella has
added them and they have added *bella!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
