A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi, so there is a guy who obviously likes me. He talks with me for hours, flirts, asks me lots of personal questions etc. He asked for my number in a flirty way. I kind of refused in a cold indirect way. Do you think I should have gave him my number? Or should I wait till I know him better? We've talked before but we have known each other for even 2 months. I'm a kind of a person who is afraid to trust guys and give a little mind games to make sure he really wants me. Does playing hard to get gets me to make sure that he does want me and won't make him think that I'm an easy target? Any tips on how to be hard to get and won't look east in front of him BUT at the same time, I want to seem nice. And a short answer / no smiley stuff/ not showing any interest will make him think I'm rude or hard to get?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2015): Avoid online friendships because they are usually fake.Ihave been in internet cafes where older guys are laughing and joking about pulling young inexperienced girls.These guys are just trying to take advantage of innocent teenagers either to get money or sex so dont allow yourself to become their prey.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2015): Following up from Abellas comment ..if this person is an online contact i think you did exactly the right thing..because online contact is not the same as real life contact .If you knew this person from work or college then its completely different as you would know more about the real person. I wouldnt bother with an online conquest..stick with someone you know well in the real world and if you havent met anyone special yet, dont worry , you will, butmake sure its someone you trust with a genuine background ,not a potentially fake one.
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A
male
reader, Hnk +, writes (12 July 2015):
 Hello I am not sure what you are hoping to achieve occurs very often. To think that you can refuse your phone number and he still runs towards you is a bit far stretched to me. Any honourable man would think that either you are not interested or just want to kill time by hooking a person for attention which in my opinion are enough to let a person loose and move on.If I have known a girl for two months and met her as well and when I asked for her phone number (in person of course) and she didn't give it to me. I'll probably think she's not interested or too full of herself. Either case, I'll move on.I'll only chase a girl if she gives me positive signs. If she shows some interest, flirts back and at least communicate what she's looking for actually. I think many of us aren't sure what tlwe want in life and thus make half hearted efforts.I'm also not sure what do you mean by mind games. My definition of mind games is that to play emotional tricks on a person unfairly just so the person is confused that if she wants to be with you or not. They think this way, they'd better have their attention and the person would like you more. Such minds games, I ABHOR to the core of my heart. Mind games to emotionally abuse you and hurt you are a big NO NO. If any person plays mind games as such, I only tell the person that I don't play such games where I'll ignore you for some days and then be extra nice to you. And if they still play their tricks and I'm sure of it, I'll simply delete their number and move on.Lastly, if you mean mind games as teasing a person and maybe flirt a bit. I think that's fine by me. You can playfully deny something and make a person work a bit hard for you. That's understable I suppose. However, it must not involve anything that unfairly treats the other person. You can have as much fun in a chase as you like but be yourself and act fairly. A fair lady attracts a lot of suitors ;)
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (12 July 2015):
 Bow, I am positive he knows you are playing hard to get(whatever that means?) Why can't you just be up front and tell folks what you are all abiout?
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A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (12 July 2015):
 Two months? He's the one playing hard to get.
Is this online or in person? Have you met him face to face or only online? Have you tried Skype with him?
If you have not yet met him in person then proceed with great caution.
If you do see him regularly in person and he has not yet asked you out on a date then move on to a guy who is willing to try harder.
Rather than play hard to get, just be lady like and not too eager to give up too much about yourself. Try to get the guy talking more than you so that you listen a lot and you ask an occasional open question to get him talking more.
But do go slowly as far as any suggestion of intimacy. THAT is when you should be reticent. Guys get the most fun from the chase. So string that part out and go slow on that aspect.
You can lose a guy by offering intimacy too soon.
You'll only lose the real losers if, when you say no to intimacy early on, they pack up and leave.
The really good guys really can manage to wait far longer than you would expect for intimacy and value you all the more for making them wait so long.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2015): The problem here is your preset attitude and what you think he'd think if you were nice to him...oh dear, who on earth put thise crazy ideas in your head! You need to learnto be you..and not care what people think of you.Drop of other peoples thoughts right there because you are a person too and you count in life. God put you on the earth and you want to try to have the best life you possibly can have without hurting anyone else or being hurt.Caution is good..your worried people will think you are a right old slapper if you bed every man you speak to..but i dont think your even one tenth their..you dont have to coldly reject a guy for him to respect you...because he just wont understand what planet your from.If you were a guy who fancied a girl and got chatting and asked for her number and she just react with a cold indifference, how would you feel.Gutted maybe..but you wouldnt risk the same reaction twice, no, you'd be looking for signs that they liked you ,like the warmth in their smile, the laughter in their eyes, the happy burst they got when you asked for their number.So dont practice or fake this.Try to concentrate on things or activities you do like and think twice about those who give you advice to be as cold as possible because you will never feel an honest emotion in your life if you cant treat people as people ..boys with mum dad and family who smile and joke and laugh with him..unless of course you are part of some dreadful clique where everyone scores points off each other faster than the weather changes and if thats the kind of life you want then no doubt some one will pull you with their " treat em mean to keep em keen" philosophy .
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