Am I a 'zoophile'? I saw two dogs mating and it gave me a thrill! Help
Q. I think i might be a zoophile... Yesterday I was in the park watching 2 dogs mating and I got this rush, like when I kiss my boyfriend. Now I'm terrified that I'll start getting feelings for the animals themselves. What should i do?...
A. 7 April 2006: I don't know if you should be worried or not but just to be on the safe side...don't get a pet. ... (read in full...)
I'm always feeling that my parnters being unfailthful, what can I do?
Q. i suffer from ocd and it seems to get worse when i date someone i feel a compulsion to check if my partner is bein unfaithfull its just like the same feeling i get when i have to check if the door is locked etc please can anyone help me as i dont ...
A. 5 April 2006: You don't mention whether you are currently on any medication for your OCD. There are a number of medicines that can greatly relieve the symptoms of OCD. I would definitely consult with your physician and see what he can come up with for you. ... (read in full...)
Is this guy looking for another wife or just for fun??
Q. Well i've met this married guy on a web site,we have been emailing and talking to one another for 5 weeks now.We have met up on a number of occasion,but have just gone for a few drinks,thought we was both looking for friendship to begin with,but ...
A. 5 April 2006: My,my, marriage can be such an impediment to having a good time, can't it!? Luckily, you can ignore the fact that you are married so effortlessly. And the best part is that you have found someone who doesn't have any honor or integrity either. You ... (read in full...)
I'm so attracted to my boss and would like to pursue my feelings. Is this possible?
Q. There is a great chemistry between me and my boss at work we flirt sometimes i catch him staring at me a lot and find him very attractive the problem being he has told a colleague that he likes me but has a problem with the fact he is my boss and he ...
A. 3 April 2006: I agree with TUX you need to change jobs before you start a relationship with your current boss. No matter how well or poor the relationship turns out, you'll never be able to enjoy your job again and get along with your co-workers as well again.... (read in full...)
We love eachother, but her mom isn't liking this and wants to call the cops!
Q. Hi... I live in England, UK. Heres my question. Im 20, but my girlfriend is only 14 (she has the mind of someone more my age, shes mature). Iv known her for about three and a half years, but we were just distant friends for about one year. She st...
A. 3 April 2006: If you are 20 years old you should know that what you are doing is putting you at risk of going to jail. They don't call 14 yr olds "jailbait" for nothing. You will need to wait a couple of years to date this young lady. If it's true love it will ... (read in full...)
I have a broken heart, help me mend it....
Q. I was in a relationship for seven years. My boyfriend left me seven months ago and relocated to his home town, promptly met someone else and is now living with her. I feel that I have nursed my hurt long enough and everyone says move on and meet ...
A. 30 March 2006: Time will heal the broken heart but in the mean time you need to stay busy. Go out with friends, join a club, do some volunteer work at the local hospital, just stay busy and highly visible. The dates will come to you and before you know your having ... (read in full...)
Our son wants a girlfriend... But an old one!
Q. I am concerned about my son. He is 16 and has been recently telling me that he wants a girlfriend. Nothing odd about that... except he wants an elderly one (i.e. 60+). I said to him that he must be joking, but he insists that it's genuine. My so...
A. 29 March 2006: We had this same question in the not to distant past. I sugges to look at the "age differences" section of this site. Lots of answers there.... (read in full...)
I'm 30, he's 16, I love him but he won't meet me!
Q. hi, well I'm confused he's 16 I'm 30 we like each other and get along too. We met on the internet but he's saying he wants to wait 1 to 2 years for we meet. How can i cope with the distance and without seeing each other we are falling in love too. ...
A. 29 March 2006: This kind of age difference CAN matter big time depending on where you live. Big time meaning jail time. Pedophiles have become the bain of our existance since the onset of the internet. Just leave children alone dearie.... (read in full...)
My son strips down to his underwear in school. Is there anything I can do?
Q. I am a father of two, married 18 years. My son is 15 years old, and sitting his GCSE's. Recently we got a phone call off his school, informing us that he'd been stripping to his underwear in lessons, and even in the outdoors. The school want...
A. 29 March 2006: Yeah I'd be worried too. Get the kid to a therapist as soon as you can. Sorry but this sounds much more serious to me than a harmless joke or prank.... (read in full...)
I'm almost ready to come out as bi, but I'm still married, any advice!?
Q. hi there, I am 32 married with 2 kids, but I have a VERY big problem..I'm fairly new to the area we live and have struck up several friendships with new woman but with one this is very different, I have fallen in love with her in a BIG way..This ...
A. 29 March 2006: I agree with the other Aunts, clean up one mess before you make another. With children involved one must always behave with utmost honor and integrity. Be a class act and get that divorce before you begin a new relationship.... (read in full...)
Why do men need something so the love making is longer?
Q. I recently did something to my husband, that totally blew his mind!,(I'll tell you later) Why do men need some kind of stimulents to have longer love making sessions with their spouses,(2 hrs)? When straight, its three minutes, once a week. or ...
A. 29 March 2006: Huh?... (read in full...)
I met a man, but he's married!
Q. I met a man a little over a week ago when I was at a club last weekend. I noticed him from across the room and one of my friends went over to him and he came over to our table. We ended up really hitting it off it was amazing and I think at that ...
A. 29 March 2006: You will get tons more pain than joy if you get involved with this cheater. Tell him to look you up after the divorce and not until then. You'll meet the guy who will be willing to be yours and yours alone, get out there and keep looking. Good Luck ... (read in full...)
He had adult material and now I feel really insecure about us. HELP!!!
Q. This is really embarrassing but it is causing me a lot of grief and affecting my relationship with my boyfriend. I am in a serious relationship with a really decent guy and we have spoken about moving in together once we have enough savings. Our ...
A. 29 March 2006: You need to find out why you are feeling so insecure about your self. The easiest way is through counseling. You will lose all the petty jealousy once you realize your self worth. This kind of behavior can ruin an otherwise wonderful relationship ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a person to tell you "let's keep our relationship a secret". What do you think?
Q. Is it normal for someone that you just started dating to tell you to keep your relationship a secret?...
A. 28 March 2006: He's probably married. Find out ASAP and if he is dump him. No future there for you.... (read in full...)
What should I do about his awful idea to move in with him at this terrible hotel?
Q. My boyfriend of 8 years is working out of state and living in a Dump of a hotel because that is the only place available..He is in the Katrina Hurricane area of Louisiana USA..Well long story short he wants me and our son who is in Kindergarten to ...
A. 15 February 2006: A nasty hotel in a disaster area is definitely no place for an active kindergardner. Your partner is being childish if he can't realize this. He probably is missing his family so much that loneliness is clouding his judgment a tad. You don't say how ... (read in full...)
If a guy wears a condom..should he still pull out before ejaculation to prevent pregnancy??
Q. If the guy wears a condom during sex should he pull out before he comes or can he stay inside me. Does this increase the chance of becoming pregnant?...
A. 15 February 2006: If you are only using condooms as your form of birth control then I wouldn't take any chances and have him pull out. If you are using the pill or contraceptive foam as well then you'll probably be okay. Don't take any chances though, unplanned ... (read in full...)
Don't want to hurt the feelings of either boy, but I have to choose just one. Don't I?
Q. I am in a really bad situation and I need help fast! I have got 2 boys on my back who both want to go out with me and I don't want to hurt either of them. Who shall I choose and for what reasons?...
A. 15 February 2006: You don't have to choose go out with both of them. You don't have to committ to just one guy! Enjoy playing the field. Have fun!... (read in full...)
How can she proove she was raped and could now be pregnant?
Q. My sister, who is 18, says that she was date raped after she went to a disco. It is too soon to know if she is pregnant but how can she prove things?...
A. 15 February 2006: She needs to speak to a rape crisis center or call the police and get their recommendation on how to proceed. This is a growing epidemic and they are aggressively acting on these cases. Tell her to get moving so the creep won't do it again.... (read in full...)
I'm the breadwinner... Should I stick with it?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for two years this month. When we first got together he owned a couple of businesses, all of which he has lost over the past two years, but since then he has not tried to get any work , leaving me to support him and two ...
A. 15 February 2006: Well since you do love him you'll have to ask yourself "Am I better off with him or without him" and decide to stay or go. I assume you have talked about the situation. If he thinks his experience places him above most jobs then you might have a ... (read in full...)
I want to get married...
Q. I've been with my partner for almost 7 years, im 25 and he is 35. Ive got to apoint where i want to get married but my partner will not ask or discuss it, what should i do. ...
A. 15 February 2006: Try one last time to get him to discuss it. If he says he doesn't want marriage anytime in the near or distant future then you'll have to decide whether you want to stay in the relationship. If marriage is important to you (and let me tell you that ... (read in full...)
He loves his son to much to leave his marriage for me. What should I do?
Q. Please give me some advice. I stupidly got involved into an affair 5 mths ago and have fallen deeply in love with this man. We were away on a course together and spent every night/day together for the whole 5 mnths. We get on so well and just ...
A. 15 February 2006: Well he made it clear from the get go that he wouldn't be the one to walk so you have no choice but to be the other woman. If you want to settle for the small potatoes that's up to you. He may still be sleeping with his wife as well. If you want to ... (read in full...)
He doesn't love her but he may try to make the marriage work for the sake of the kids, do I wait for him?
Q. I've been with this man for 1 and half years. We broke up twice before. We met when we were both separated and my divorce is done but he is still ongoing because of custody and money.We both have 2 kids each from previous marriage.His ex has not ...
A. 15 February 2006: First off she isn't an ex yet. Either he's just stringing you along or he really is confused. But his yo-yo behavior really concerns me for your sake. I would start planning my future without him if I were you. If he finally decides to divorce once ... (read in full...)
I'm the breadwinner... Should I stick with it?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for two years this month. When we first got together he owned a couple of businesses, all of which he has lost over the past two years, but since then he has not tried to get any work , leaving me to support him and two ...
A. 14 February 2006: You don't mention whether you love him. Do the children belong to both of you? Is he being totally lazy? Need a little more information here.... (read in full...)
Why would this married guy lie to his wife?
Q. Why would a married man lie to his wife about his whereabouts? I'm friends with a married couple, I've known them both for about 3 years. They have been working out of state for the last year because thier business failed. They come back once a ...
A. 14 February 2006: He might have lied because he knows his wife is insecure and might get upset knowing he was alone with another woman. Just to save himself and her some grief, he decided to tell the shopping story. No big deal if you ask me.... (read in full...)
What does: 'the worst possible way' mean?
Q. I am a female. I recently told a friend (married guy) who'd helped me out recently, that if he ever needed anything, to let me know. He said that he may need me one day in the "worst possible way". What does that mean??...
A. 12 February 2006: Anything he means by "the worst way" can't be good in my book. Buy him a plant for helping you and figure you are even steven.... (read in full...)
What exactly does "third base" mean?
Q. what is third base...
A. 12 February 2006: When I was a whippersnapper: 1st was kissing 2nd was hand up the blouse 3rd was hand down the pants Homerun was going all the way All of it kinda silly isn't it?!... (read in full...)
How can I get rid of stretch marks?
Q. Im expecting at the moment, and i have a one year old. So my stomache is coverd in stretch marks and its maing me feel really un sexy for my long term partner. I wanted to know if there is any women that have the same problem or is there anyone that ...
A. 8 February 2006: My husband calls them "battle scars" and says I should be proud of them. Don't worry they fade over time. Just look at you children whenever you feel the scars are ugly.... (read in full...)
How do I move on?
Q. How do you move on after coming out of a relationship, when you love that someone who has left you so much its hurts!...
A. 4 February 2006: Stay busy: read, shop, go to a movie, redecorate a room, anything to stay busy and occupy you thoughts. Your best friend is time. Good Luck, you'll get through it.... (read in full...)
What can I do to keep my mistress's interest in sex alive?
Q. I am in my 40s and have been married for 26 years. During this time i have had a number of affairs but now i have found a woman i have been in a relationship with for over 3 years. My wife has poor health and I have work related ties. I have ...
A. 4 February 2006: You poor, poor thing, nothing is more tragic than a mistress that won't put out; I mean that's her job for crying out loud. Well I guess you'll just have to rustle up a new one. So much to do so little time.... (read in full...)
I know I should be able to cope with being on my own, but I just start imagining things! Advice? Help?
Q. Hello, please help me. I am thirteen years old, old enough to be left alone in the house on my own. My parents leave me all the time, and I want them to so I can get used to being alone, but I never do because I get so scared. I don't want to ta...
A. 3 February 2006: What I would do is make sure all the doors and windows are locked, blinds or curtain shut, and curl up with a really good book or watch a FUNNY movie. ... (read in full...)
She said she was had feelings for her ex, so should I bother to ask her out again?
Q. Hi I am really interested in this girl. She is showing signs of interest (I think) and we are both shy. I have asked her out and she said if she didn't have feelings for her ex. I don't no when to ask her out again, if at all. Any help would be...
A. 3 February 2006: Just tell her to look you up when she feels she is ready and keep moving on with your own life. If and when she does show an interest you can decide if YOU are still interested. Good luck.... (read in full...)
What are the signs that a guy wants to break up with you?
Q. What are some signs that a guy wants to break up with you? (What if he is scared to?) ...
A. 3 February 2006: Why are you looking for signs, why don't you just have a talk with him and find out?... (read in full...)
We think it's time to meet, and want to be together. Why won't my parents let him stay with us?
Q. Imagine I am your 18 year old daughter... I have been chatting to online/dating a 48 year old for 34 months, and we want to meet for the first time. We both love each other (we really do!) but dating over the internet is too hard for us, and we n...
A. 3 February 2006: If everyone will just go look at all the crap ‘deadrainbowpixie’ has posted you will see that she is just playing with this site and should be ignored. One minute she is 16 and the next she is 18 etc...There are people out there that have real ... (read in full...)
Always had an attraction for a friend, but he's attached. Now his adult son seems interested. Dangerous territory?
Q. I've known this man since we were 12ish. He is 40, I am 34, always had a hot spot for each other. We have now begun working together in the office. Things got heated, although he is not single, and nothing has happened between us. Just recently...
A. 2 February 2006: I wouldn't have anything more to do with this family if I were you (other than just friends). Just nip it in the bud with the son, it may or may not jeopardize your job and it might make you uncomfortable at work. And cool it with POPS if he isn't ... (read in full...)
We think it's time to meet, and want to be together. Why won't my parents let him stay with us?
Q. Imagine I am your 18 year old daughter... I have been chatting to online/dating a 48 year old for 34 months, and we want to meet for the first time. We both love each other (we really do!) but dating over the internet is too hard for us, and we n...
A. 2 February 2006: Ha Ha 'deadrainbowpixie' you are busted!!!!!!!... (read in full...)
My school friend sucks up to all the teachers and thinks she's better than me. I'm so annoyed with her!
Q. hi, its just my friend is really annoying me. In school she sucks up to all the teachers i think she loves them or something and she always has to do better than me in everything. im really starting to hate her shall i say something to her? please ...
A. 2 February 2006: I guess you should just look around for a friend that doesn't bug you so much. If she asks you why you aren't hanging out with her anymore then you could tell what you just wrote here in the column. Maybe if she values your friendship she'll change ... (read in full...)
During sex my boyfriend admitted to sex with another girl. He says "it's just sex", so it shouldn't bother me!
Q. My bf lives abroad and we only see each other every few weeks. I have just spent a wonderful Xmas with him and during sex he told me that he had sex with his former gf a few weeks previously. He says that he loves me but also that he sees no reason ...
A. 2 February 2006: Looks like he gets "lucky" wherever he hangs his hat. I'm sure he gives the other lady the same line he handed you. Things will never change with this player so if you can't handle it you must give him the boot. Good luck!... (read in full...)
Unhappily married and having an affair. Should I stay married just for my kids?
Q. I have been unhappily married since my daughter was born seven years ago. I was rejected and ruined. I tried and tried to make things work. I threatened to leave. I found someone that cared. We had an affair for four years. He is also married ...
A. 1 February 2006: Some people DO need a kick in the ass. It's the only way to get their full attention. Actions that knowingly hurt others especially children cannot be condoned for any reason. Sugar-coating cheating, adultery, etc... doesn't change the hurtful ... (read in full...)
My friend of 20 just got engaged to a 68-year-old. What problems might they expect?
Q. I am a 23 year old girl and my friend is 20 years old. She told me she has recently got engaged to a 68-year-old man she met in a pub - he is the owner of it, and that he is a decent person, was what she told me. She asked me what problems w...
A. 1 February 2006: Well she must like her beer or he must be rich. Can't think of any other reasons a 20 yr old would even consider marrying someone 48 years older! I know God has a sense of humor but I doubt if His hand is in this. Your friend's soulmate is destined ... (read in full...)
Sex is a problem because I was raped...what can I do?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have a problem and I really need some advice. I am a lesbian and I am going out with my girlfriend six months now and things are great except sexually. I was raped six years ago now and everyime she touches me I kinda seize up. Is t...
A. 1 February 2006: I'm afraid that you will probably need to get some professional counseling in order to get something as serious as rape behind you. If you are in the US there are all kinds of rape crisis centers that can refer you or help you in house. Look them up ... (read in full...)
We're having marriage problems and neither of us wants to move out! What should I do?
Q. I WANT TO LEAVE MY HUSBAND.I CANT AFFORD TO MOVE OUT AND HE WONT WHAT CAN I DO...
A. 1 February 2006: Not much at this point. I guess you need to start saving money until you can afford to move. Is there any family member you could get a loan from? ... (read in full...)
Unhappily married and having an affair. Should I stay married just for my kids?
Q. I have been unhappily married since my daughter was born seven years ago. I was rejected and ruined. I tried and tried to make things work. I threatened to leave. I found someone that cared. We had an affair for four years. He is also married ...
A. 1 February 2006: You should get a divorce. You can then move on with your life. Your husband deserves a faithful partner give him the freedom to find one. Your child deserves a mother she can respect.... (read in full...)
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