I think my mother is with someone who is going to use her but I can't talk to her and know I am losing the relationship with my mom
Q. Dear Cupid, My father passed away a couple of years ago from dementia. My mother started having an affair with a married man when he was ill (5 years ago). He was working for my parents at the time. She is 75. The relationship has developed...
A. 19 January 2016: Hi
This is a difficult one and obviously I can see where you are coming from trying to protect your mother.
I am wondering how much of this is actually about your mother though, I appreciate you are probably still grieving the loss of your fath... (read in full...)
My married ex's birthday is coming up, how do I wish her a Happy Birthday?
Q. Dear Cupid, I had an affair with a married woman. It had been almost a year since we broke up. I didn't answer her call and reply her mail. I'm still single and I couldn't find a girlfriend may be cuz of my busy work. To be honest, sometime I...
A. 23 September 2011: She is married, what you had is finished so I think maybe you should let sleeping dogs lie. I dont see the point in stirring up the past now and wont do anyone any good.
Take care xx... (read in full...)
How to tell my parents that I'm dating my ex again after a very destructive break-up?
Q. My ex-boyfriend and I recently decided to get back together and I don't know how to break the news to my parents (who I still live with). Back story: He is my first and only love and I am his. We were together for about two years but had a very b...
A. 23 September 2011: I think it may be a good idea for support if nothing else, myself and my husband went through something similar when we had been together a year and we decided to get back together after a few months. We were both young and I think the split made us ... (read in full...)
Why is it me that has to arrange everything and do all the chasing?
Q. Hi, Ive been seeing this women for 4 weeks now. We have been out on several dates (ice skating, dinner, theme park) and I have arranged another where we will go horse riding for an hour or so. The thing is I quite like her, but it seams as ...
A. 21 July 2011: Hey maybe she is just old fashioned, not all of us women are up on the equal rights thing.
You get on well while you are out and you have fun.
Stop analising and enjoy.
Take care xx... (read in full...)
Boyfriend broke up with me because I"m annoying and his ex told him to do it!
Q. Dear Cupid, My bf broke up with me because he find me 'aanoying'. He discussed with his ex and he thinks I'm not the one for him. So she advised him to break up..and so he did. I begged and asked for another chance to change and he doesnt w...
A. 21 July 2011: He sounds like an absolute child saying you annoy him and discussing it with his ex.
I would walk away and find someone that has a bit of maturity about them.
In all relationships there are niggles even if its something like leaving the top off ... (read in full...)
Do I leave this marriage or stay out of guilt?
Q. I was married when I was 19 years old ( I am 24 now) and I am losing hope for my marriage. When I got into this relationship I truly did love my husband. However, we fight very often, and the fights have sometimes become physical on both sides ...
A. 21 July 2011: By the sounds of it you have tried hard enough and why should you stay in a marriage that you have had to endure sexual abuse.
If there is no trust (quite rightly) and no desire for pysical intimacy then what else is left.
You can not stay in a mar... (read in full...)
Why do people get the wrong idea and think that I am flirting?
Q. dear cupid, Why do people think that I am flirting? I am happily married woman. My man rocks my socks off but other women always accuse me of flirting. When did flirting become synonymous with talking or being friendly with the opposite sex? I ...
A. 21 July 2011: Jealousy......
Other people obviously feel threatened by you and thats the way they deal with it.
As long as you know what you are doing who cares what anyone else thinks your husband clearly does not have a problem with it.
I used to be the same ... (read in full...)
Should I contact him again or is he blowing me off?
Q. hi, i met this guy on a night out, we was with each other most of the night. we swaped numbers and had been texting and he told me he really likes me, hes in the army so not home for 2 weeks but said well met up then. but for the last 2 d...
A. 21 July 2011: There could be any number of reasons why you have not heard back from him like you say he is away at work.
He probably knows you have text so just leave it now, if you have not heard back in a couple of days move on but if you keep on testing it c... (read in full...)
Boyfriend agrees that I love him more than he loves me. Anyone have any thoughts on this?
Q. Hi. Here is my thing. It transpires that I love my bf more than he loves me. We have discussed this and we mainly have just acknowledged that I do seem to love him in a more intense way then he loves me. Don’t get me wrong; he does love me. He goes ...
A. 20 July 2011: Hi
He has told you he loves you, you are trying for a baby and buying a house.
So what was to happen if he looked up and said at some point he loved you more? Would you then expect him to leave you?
I can not see how anyone can honestly say... (read in full...)
Is it really a big deal if I have never been in a relationship?
Q. Why do women make its such a big deal, if you've never been in a relationship? (girls is it a red flag or what? and how is it a red flag, i mean if somebody hasnt been through a intimate relationship, does that make it a no go?) ive honestly been...
A. 19 July 2011: Hi
I think the fact you are a virgin and have not had a relationship before is an amazing quality and shows that you are not prepared to rush into anything.
You dont need to lie, be yourself and you will find the right person for you, anyone ... (read in full...)
Is it worth going after a man who is very popular with women?
Q. Is it worth going after a guy who is very attractive, and who a lot of girls fancy ?. This guy seems interested in me. I think he is very attractive, but i've noticed from his facebook page that a lot of girls find him attractive. They post comments ...
A. 19 July 2011: Hi
Yeah sure go for it there is nothing stopping you, you think he is interested in you so strike up conversation and see where it goes.
The only thing i will say is though if you are going to pursue someone that popular you will need to have... (read in full...)
I think he was only after sex, but I still want to be friends with him! What should I do now?
Q. Hey, The other week this guy I've known for about 6 months contacted me on Facebook and asked if I wanted to hang with him. I said okay since he was pretty nice and I'd like to get to know him better but then he started asking me to have sex with...
A. 19 July 2011: Hi
Seriously.... a nice guy does not use someone in that way, you gave him what he wanted and i think because you gave into him so quickly he has lost interest because there is no challenge now.
My suggestion would be to move on and forget about... (read in full...)
What is the best way to pick up a girl in a club?
Q. Hey. I'm 18 and have the simplest question ever. When I'm out clubbing, what's the best way to 'pick up' a girl? I'm not that interested in the casual sex, I want to meet someone and actually get to know them. How should I do it without getting too ...
A. 19 July 2011: Hi
All you can do is be yourself act naturally and if you like it dance, most girls i know like a man that likes to dance.
I personally think that is a better option than the bar as it can give the impression you are a big drinker and desperat... (read in full...)
My man's kid plays with her kid, and I am worrying that the mum is coming on to my man!!
Q. Hi agony aunts and uncles, i hope you can give me some advice on this problem i have, i always come to this site for advice, it might be nothing, but from a outside view you will be able to tell me if i am being silly or it needs addressing. I am...
A. 19 July 2011: I can see where you are coming from as you are not there to keep a subtle eye on it but here's what you said and i'm not being rude but often we dont actually see what we have written.
1. The kids get on great
2. They drop the children off and do t... (read in full...)
My best friend's husband is a jerk and she just doesn't see it!!
Q. Hello everyone, just want to thank u ahead of time for reading... Ok here we go.. There's 5 of us girls who we have been best friends since high school.. We've known each other since elementary.. But all of us got really close after high school.....
A. 19 July 2011: I understand that you are worried about your friend but she is at the end of the day an adult and you need to leave her to lead her own life and make her own mistakes.
She is in love with this man and you putting him down all the time is push... (read in full...)
Can our daughter's possible health problem turn-off my wife's feelings for me and depress her?
Q. Me and my wife married for 10 years, have two kids. Latelly we have observed that our 5 years old daughter have some socilal adoptive problem. She doesn't follow social rules. She doesn't like to play with kids, doesn't follow the reules in class. ...
A. 19 July 2011: That was like reading about my son.
Me and my husband have two children and they are very different, my son is 14 years old and has been very much the same all his life and we spent alot of time during his younger years seeing different spec... (read in full...)
Trapped in a sexless marriage for almost 20 years, wife won't have sex and won't say why she doesn't want to. Should I leave?
Q. I have been with my wife for almost 20 years now. We have had a sexless marriage for most of that time. We were arguing about it even just 1 year into the relationship. It's not that we never, ever have sex, but we go years in-between having i...
A. 19 July 2011: Wow what a situation to be in, I think it will be very difficult for any aunt on this site however good they are to give you the answers you are looking for.
I get the feeling that maybe something really serious might have happened on your wife... (read in full...)
What's the deal with this guy? Should I just leave things and walk away?
Q. I like a guy who's friends with someone i dated 5 years ago. We met recently a couple of times and got on really well. He said he would let me know when he's back in the country as he works abroad to meet up again. I was aware he returned t...
A. 18 July 2011: Thats something only you can decide, I think he has been very open and honest with you so far.
If you like him you could stay in contact and see where it goes when he is well in himself again.
There is nothing stopping you getting on with your lif... (read in full...)
My daughter's father broke up with me but wants to be friends with benefits!
Q. ok here it goes me and my boyfriend of 5 years just broke up a few months ago, he is also the father of my daughter. i figured we just needed a break, but he started acting like its a permanent thing, he stayed at friends houses for awhile, then ...
A. 14 July 2011: So he wants to have his cake and eat it?
All the time you let him he will carry on.
I had the same thing with my husband many years ago and I was the same as you would do anything he wanted just so I could keep him around.
Let me tell you, yo... (read in full...)
After our 3rd date I gave her a kiss goodnight... Did I come on too strongly?
Q. I've just got back from my 3rd date with a girl I like. We've had 2 highly successful dates and this 3rd one appeared to be no acception. We talked, laughed and had a nice evening, just like the previous two dates. But tonight I wanted to slip in ...
A. 14 July 2011: I think maybe you are worrying too much, she did not pull away when you kissed her so she obviously enjoyed it.
Women work in different ways, she could have left you and wanted to get home and chat to a friend or something to let them know what a go... (read in full...)
How do you make your relationship last during college?
Q. I was wondering, how do you make your relationship last during college? My boyfriend and I have been dating over a year, and things are amazing. We both want to make it work, and I'm looking for advice on how we can work. We'll both be going to...
A. 13 July 2011: Hunny you cant put too much pressure on your relationship by trying to make work, relationships will work if you are meant to be I firmly believe that.
All relationships are put to the test everyday but as long as thurs trust and security thats the ... (read in full...)
I want to be with my girlfriend, but everything is pointing to a break up. What should I do?
Q. I am 18 years old and i have been dating my girlfriend for about a year and a half. She is head over heels in love with me, and i thought i felt the same, and i think i still do, but sometimes i'm not quite sure. It's been a rocky relationship ...
A. 13 July 2011: It sounds very much like you are going to end up hurting both of you in time if you carry on with your relationship.
The fact that you have said there is already someone else in the picture speaks volumes, if you were really that into her ther... (read in full...)
My parents have cheated on each other... Is the same thing going to happen to me?
Q. Ok folks, this is a biggie. 7 years ago my Dad went through a mid-life crisis, during which time he was very depressed. This sparked a separation with my Mum and resulted in him cheating on her. Somehow the two managed to work things out and w...
A. 12 July 2011: I can totally understand why you are worried but what will be will be.
Just because your parents have done it does not mean you will too.
All couples go through rough patches at times some cheat some dont, I really believe that when you have bee... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a two-year-old to want to nap/sleep/lay on her dad's chest?
Q. Is it normal for a two year old girl to want to nap/sleep/lay on her dad's chest? She's definitely a daddy's girl but a friend of mine told me she shouldn't want to lay on him. As soon as he lays down even if she's not going down for a nap or rea...
A. 12 July 2011: Perfectly normal, my daughter still does it and she is seven. Would people think it weird if she done it to you? No there is no difference.
Take care xx
... (read in full...)
Cheating.lies.affairs.guilt.fool
Q. was with my man for 2 years until he left me in may 2010 as he had met someone else although we kept in touch.2 months later we started meetin up as friendsm him sayin she was out his life,and he had only done it to push me away.We were gettin on ...
A. 6 July 2011: Clearly from what you have said he wants the best of both worlds, you can not force someone to be faithful so there are two options for you;
Either carry on with the way it is not trusting him, checking up on him on his phone and feeling mise... (read in full...)
What is up with the hot and cold? is he scared?
Q. more confused than ever! i posted here before. i met a guy online a couple months back, talked on phone, emailed, then we met about a month ago.we laughed,chatted, major eye contact! he was supposed to return in a couple days, but he didnt. over a w...
A. 6 July 2011: Have you considered this man may be married?
It may be that he wants company when he is away from home.
Hey i might well be wrong but it does seem to be unusual behaviour, either that or his last relationship was a bad one so he is holding back abi... (read in full...)
My son is taking after his aggressive father. What should I do?
Q. I have a son who will be turning 4 at the beginning of September. He is a sweet little boy and loves giving hugs and being silly; however he is very agressive the past few months. He primarily likes playing alone, occassionally he enjoys playing ...
A. 30 June 2011: I would suggest an appointment with your doctor as a start, there are many medical conditions that display similar symptoms ie autism, attention deficit disorder.
Not saying that he does have either of these though as im not a doctor, I went thro... (read in full...)
Do I follow the advice of others or listen to my heart?
Q. There is this guy that I like a lot and certain people around me keep trying to convince me that he is not the guy for me, for instance they brought up an issue about his personality being different than mine because he parties frequently and I ...
A. 29 June 2011: Many friends said the same to me 17 years ago when I started seeing my husband and we are very happy and in love.
Listen to everyone's opinions but follow your heart.
Take care x... (read in full...)
She chose her husband over me and I can't deal with it!
Q. My married girlfriend just told me that this is the end of the affair. I don't understand why would she dump me if I was there for her in time of need and always very supportive. She says she still loves me but she can not take the pressure that I ...
A. 29 June 2011: It must be very hard to live two lives ( not that I sympathise) but maybe she never had any intention of leaving her husband and now you have made her chose she is scared her husband will find out.
I understand I must be hard for you you were dece... (read in full...)
Why does my friend act like this?
Q. There's this friend of mine that i really like,he's really confusing.He day he talks to me,the next day he ignores me.He texts me at midnight to wish me happy birthday,the next day not one "hello". For example one day we were talking online.A...
A. 29 June 2011: Play him at his own game, it will go one of two ways...... He will stop the texts and messaging and then you know there is no future for you or he will step it up realising he been an idiot.
Take care x... (read in full...)
Why do women keep walking all over me? And what should I do about my ex?
Q. [Mod Note: 2 posts have been combined into 1] my gf has been blowing hot and cold never letting go of her past. (i was her rebound) which over the time we were together i came to realize. She has lied to me about contact with her ex several times i ...
A. 17 June 2011: As hard as it may sound, it seems very much like she has used you to get back on her feet.
Unfortunately some people in life are like that after all they
can get.
As for her leaving stuff at your place in her mind I guess she will always have ... (read in full...)
Is he telling the truth about these text messages?
Q. Please help me! Okay, so I check my bfs phone every now and then ... i never find/see anything innappropriate so, im always happy with what i see, checking his phone kindda reassures me that - well i dont really know cause i know that he wouldnt ...
A. 17 June 2011: What is it with people thinking it is ok to check their partners phone, its the same as opening their mail which is an offence.
Seriously if you feel the need to check up on him in the early days, then I really dont think you have much of a futu... (read in full...)
I don't want to be 40 and alone but I can't get a girlfriend!
Q. Hey everyone. I'm starting to get a little worried about the way things are going. I'm 23 years old. I'm friendly, maybe a little shy but i can come out of my shell quickly, i go to the gym a few times a week (i'm trying hard with that stuff right...
A. 16 June 2011: Oh hun you are still very young and you seem to be putting so much pressure on yourself to find a girlfriend..
Chillax a little you usually find when you are looking there is no one around and when you stop ....bingo.
Just got out and enjoy yo... (read in full...)
Unexpected pregnancy, lost of grandfather and boyfriend and now my mom wants me to give up baby or move!
Q. I am 23 years old and have a 23 months old daughter with a lad i was with for nearly 4 years. Sadly my granddad died of cancer 11 weeks ago and i have been grieving for him alot. Me and my boyfriend split up on the same day that was 11 weeks si...
A. 16 June 2011: Only you know if you will really be able to cope, mentally anyway. There is alot of help available for you for housing and money.
My advise would be to go to your local cab as they will be able to give you all the info you need. I do know that to g... (read in full...)
Will watching porn with my wife damage our relationship? Or is it a good thing?
Q. is it a good thing for a husband and wife to watch porn together? are there any good benefits from watching it together or will it cause harm in our marriage.my wife and i have been doing this every now and then. thanks for any replies ....
A. 14 June 2011: All the time both parties are consenting to it and happy then I cant see it could cause any harm. Try just talking to each other about why you watch it.
Take care x... (read in full...)
He said he would leave his wife for me......almost 3 years ago! What should I do now?
Q. I dont even know whether to call him husband or not,well i met this married guy 2yrs back.his wife cannot conceive and they have tried medical help in vain.At first i was reluctant giving into him for the obvious reason he is married.He managed to ...
A. 14 June 2011: I think you should move on, if he has not left his wife in three years he has no intention of doing so and why should he when he has the best of both worlds.
I have seen the damage done to all involved in affairs and it destroys so many lives. You ... (read in full...)
Even if a guy dumps you, does he still get jealous?
Q. Hello, I would like to know opinions on the following. I have been told that even if a guy dumps you he will still get jealous or have a bruised ego when he sees you have moved on to someone else. Is this true? To me it makes no sense! I was d...
A. 14 June 2011: Age old thing, he does not want you and wants no one else to have you either. His problem get on with your life and he will just have to deal with it.
Take care x... (read in full...)
Should I get married?
Q. This is going to sound ridiculous, some of you will probably ask why I am even thinking about doing it if I have doubts. I used to think exactly the same. The thing is, I feel like I have so much to loose if I don't; I get on great with his fami...
A. 14 June 2011: I would say its a bad idea, you will both end up repenting each other down the line. As much as it may cause hurt to people the best thing would be to call the wedding off. I have been with my husband 17 years and the sexual attraction and love is ... (read in full...)
How long should I leave him to have his space?
Q. Well it seems every relationship i have ends up a distaster! Been with my bf for 4 months so not that long really but we get along great and we also work together in the same company so share mutual friends. Recently hes been distant with me ...
A. 15 May 2011: Maybe this man is scared of commitment and just needs some time to work things out in his head. Its difficult to say how much time to give him because by forcing the issue you could push him away but at the same time you cant put your life on ... (read in full...)
Will my life always suck?
Q. Hi, firstly thanks for reading this and your advice. I'm having a big stress out at the moment!!! Number one is I'm unemployed and looking for job, but nothing out there. I'm looking to get into media again, but not had one interview. Signed u...
A. 14 May 2011: You are having quite a tough run at the moment, but believe me you can turn all of this around. Contact CAB as they can be a great help to you with the financial side of things and can help sort out the uni. You should also get in contact with your ... (read in full...)
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