A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I've been with my boyfriend for two years this month. When we first got together he owned a couple of businesses, all of which he has lost over the past two years, but since then he has not tried to get any work , leaving me to support him and two children. Recently I quit my job and he still hasn't got himself working, should i stay with him or move on?
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female
reader, willywombat +, writes (17 February 2006):
I think you are a little disapointed in the way this relationship has worked out. But I also feel that you partner could be depressed and have a low self esteem because of his failures. I understand when you met him you were looking at the whole package and now that package is somewhat tarnished as it isnt as bright and shiny as it once appeared.
If you no longer love your partner then get out. If the love has gone then there really isnt really much point in working at it is there?
But if you love him still and feel the relationship could have a tomorrow then you seriously need to look at communication issues and try to make things work. If you feel he isnt listening to you when you talk to him about his need to get a job and be an equal partner in your relationship then get an outsider in to help you. Some sort of relationship counselling would be ideal.
I hope it all works out the way you want it to.
xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI quit my job because of a hostel work environment, my kids are old enough to watch themselves.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (15 February 2006):
Well since you do love him you'll have to ask yourself "Am I better off with him or without him" and decide to stay or go. I assume you have talked about the situation. If he thinks his experience places him above most jobs then you might have a long wait for his employment. Meanwhile your kids have to eat so get yourself employed. If you stay your dishwasher will be loaded if you go you may find a guy that pays for the water and soap!
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A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (15 February 2006):
Why did you quit your job? Who looks after the children when you did work?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI do love him,my initial attraction to him was because he had his stuff together and i was used to taking care of "strays ". (I thought he was A good choice because we were both on the same track) The children are not his, only mine. He likes to act like he's not suited for most jobs because of his previous businesses among other things like his height and weight. He's not totally lazy he'll load the dish washer.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (14 February 2006):
You don't mention whether you love him. Do the children belong to both of you? Is he being totally lazy? Need a little more information here.
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