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... Send *sk Heather a private message | | | *sk Heather's profile:Hi, I`m 43, happily married, no children at home now, Aah the peace!! When I was at school, other children (and 1 teacher!) were asking my advice, and over all the years nothing has changed, I`m still asked for my advice, which I take as a Huge Compliment. It`s not all been plain sailing for me; I have lost a child, there is nothing worse. I have known the pain of infidelity, and how it stings. Sometimes, when someone asks for advice, they just want someone to agree with them, to back them. I can`t do that. I tell it how it is. Heather xx |
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Guys, do you find it really unattractive when girls have a gap between the front teeth?
Q. Hi, I'm a teenager with a gap between my teeth. I was wondering if guys find it really unattractive when girls have a gap between the front teeth. Does it make even pretty girls look ugly in a guy's opinion??...
A. 16 April 2007: I gave this Question to my husband to ask the younger guys in the office; and the results are :- ( out of 23 guys ) :- 18 said a gap between the front teeth would be seen as cute / individual / attractive. 2 said unnatractive. 1 said It would ... (read in full...)
My best friend and I argued and I want to have a meeting with her to explain things. What should I do and say?
Q. I have recently argued with my best friend. Can you please give me advice on how to organise a meeting between us. Recently someone told me that friends are never your friends if you are quite rich and she when we last argued told me she only liked ...
A. 16 April 2007: We all say things in "The heat of the Moment", and I think you realise that this is the case here; although it stung. It was said to sting; but, within moments was regreted. I feel sure she already knows the advantages of having a true friend; and ... (read in full...)
Im only 11, but I love 2 guys, and dont know if they love me to be able to choose which one to go out with!?
Q. hi cupid im 11 years old and i live in florida im in elementry, in 5th grade. there are 2 guys i both love but i don't know if they love me and the problem is i don't know who to choose i both like them but i have a BIG choice both are cute ...
A. 30 March 2007: That`s a difficult one, especially as you`re only 11 years old. Perhaps you should play hard to get, and let these two guys make the choice? However, I`ll tell you what ALL guys secretly LOVE; that`s seing a girl with her head bent over her ... (read in full...)
Am I being a drama queen blowing this up, when he said he preferred that I didnt go out with him ?
Q. i have been with my bf for over 3years now. we both had plans on Fri nite but last nite i told him how mine had fallen through. i had never dropped hints about him inviting me out with him n his mates but he asked if i wanted to go, i said no ...
A. 29 March 2007: As I see it, you both had plans made for an evening out with friends. Having been together for over 3 years, you are happy together and have trust in each other. Then your plans fall through for your evening out. He sees your dissapointment, and ... (read in full...)
Im having an affair, I love her not my wife, cant break free, what should I do ?
Q. Life is in a mess. I have to choose between my wife and my outside child's mother. I have two kids with my wife - 2 year old (outside child same age)and a 3 month old. Have a great family life. But Outside woman just does the trick for me. I am so ...
A. 29 March 2007: What a Gooey Mess you`ve made for yourself, and the women; but most of all the children you`ve had, for they ARE YOUR CHILDREN. Not what you want to hear; but there are many men & women who`d give ANYTHING to have what you have (no I don`t mean ... (read in full...)
Im so confused who to pick, guy number one or guy number two!
Q. Need help ASAP! I have two very great men that both love me. I was in a relationship with a guy for around 5 years, my first high school love. I am now 23 he is 26. We broke it off a couple years ago but still never stopped talking and doing ...
A. 29 March 2007: You`re confused, I`m confused! Guy No 1, Guy No 2, Guy No 1, Guy No 2. I take my hat off to Silence is Golden! ! ... (read in full...)
My gf kissed another guy when she got drunk! Any advice?
Q. My g/f got drunk for the first time in her life and then walked to her room with a guy. He gave her a kiss and she didn't object. Then she told him to leave. We have been together for 4 years and I really love her and she is really sorry...Any ...
A. 29 March 2007: My Advice? Let it go!! You`ve been together for 4 Years, and she`s never cheated (or wanted to). He kissed her, when she was drunk, then she told him to leave, and he did!. Finish, Period, End of Story. ... (read in full...)
Is everyone just impolite ?
Q. help i do walk every day in town i do see people face to face ,sometimes i feel strange becouse it seems i am the only one who say hello ,we are humans we say that we love that we want every thing to be green full of love ,but why we dont say hell...
A. 29 March 2007: The Follow up to your Original question prompted me to answer. Yes, what you said in your Original posting all made perfect sense; but your follow up was truly just amazing! The way you feel "at one" with nature, I feel should be shared with others ... (read in full...)
Is this too soon to be getting engaged ?
Q. me and my boyfriend were dating for seven months an we split up for two years we are now getting back together and he wants to marry me and i want to marry him but be engaged for about two years is this too soon for our relationship?...
A. 29 March 2007: Only You & Your Boyfriend can decide what`s right for the both of you. You are both still very young. Sometimes, young love like yours can lead to a long & fullfilling marriage; sometimes the parties were too young, and in time grew apart & ... (read in full...)
I never stopped loving her, in fact I am STILL in love...
Q. in love after a recent breakup..... Recently (feb '07) my partner ended our relationship because I became emotionally detached and this hurt her very much. Unfortunately I was dealing with a traumatic issue that came up and I was having a difficul...
A. 28 March 2007: Many people say they "Love someone", but you say "In Love", There is a Very big difference between Love, and In Love. These words show your depth of feeling for your lady. My Advice to bring her around? Write her a Long, long Letter, spill out all ... (read in full...)
How can I get over my guilt?
Q. Please can somebody help me get over my guilt. I once betrayed my best mate, I slept with his ex girlfriend and she had our child, why I dont know. What came over me I guess I was feeling low and she was there offering herself to me and I took wha...
A. 28 March 2007: From what you say, you are "Eaten up" with Guilt. You also say you slept with his ex girlfriend; surely if she`s an ex, then you`ve not betrayed your best mate? The Thing that concerns me though is the fact that you know you have a child, which from ... (read in full...)
OMG... could I possibly be pregnant?
Q. i had sex with a guy last sunday. he used a condom but i do not remember much because i was drunk.. When i woke up friday i was very dizzy and i felt like i was going to throw up, that lasted a couple days. At school I could barely concentrate ...
A. 27 March 2007: It might be an idea not to have sex with guys when you`re drunk. I doubt very much you`re pregnant, but to set your mind at rest, go see your doctor. In future, why not have an evening plan: To go out with your girlfriends, have a few drinks & ... (read in full...)
Was what he said a chat up line or a statement?
Q. i need some advice people!! please help!! a guy recently made a comment to me at work saying he couldnt get a girlriend coz of the wierd shifts, I didnt think anything of it....until i mentioned it in passing conversation to a friend, thats when ...
A. 26 March 2007: My Advice? Leave the friends and third parties out of it!. You WON`T look silly, I promise you. He`s Shy, You`re Shy; when you go up to him at work, with a passing comment (weather/polatics/working conditions), you know you have no need to be shy; ... (read in full...)
Gals, if you just meet a man who turns you on, would you have sex with him right away?
Q. Women: If a man you meet is extremely good looking or just turns you on, under “any circumstances” you will you have sex with him? One example: I picked up a gal I was sitting next to in a restaurant (at the bar) that told me later I would no...
A. 26 March 2007: To answer your question, No, Personally I would not have sex straight away, but everyone is different. I can`t see how you can "get to know someone" over a couple of drinks in an evening. A few drinks in the bar, with the guy I`ve just met, wouldn`t ... (read in full...)
I lied that i slept with someone else so then he DID sleep with someone else!
Q. I told a terrible lie to my boyfriend of 5 years. We had got in a fight and he told me that he might want our relationship to be over so i told him he was free when i didnt mean it i then also told him the next day that i had slept with someone ...
A. 25 March 2007: I Agree with Dream Master; he tells it how it is. Although not what you want to hear; you should NEVER tell Lies in a Relationship; You have found this out, the Hard Way. I Don`t know where your current relationship is going, if indeed it`s going ... (read in full...)
He said he is bored in the relationship, how can I make the relationship more interesting?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 10 months now. The beginning was amazing, but after 6 months we knew so much about each other that nothing was new or exciting. I love him with all my heart and he loves me too. But he's continued to ...
A. 17 March 2007: Yes it hurts, but he was honest with you; he`s going away to college and like he said, anything could happen in the next four years. Anything could happen for you too in the next four years! I wouldn`t bother too much with making the relationship ... (read in full...)
I am scared I will never be number one in his life...
Q. Me and my boyfriend fight all the time we can't agree on any thing. But I love him so much. When I am around him I feel something I have never felt before and when he looks in to my eyes i know he is true but I am scared I will never be never be ...
A. 17 March 2007: You do indeed sound lost; but you can find yourself! You think that you have only ever been second best, well that`s just not true. I think from your message, you may be quite young; and we have ALL had doubts. Please look in the mirror, and see ... (read in full...)
She recently told me a dirty secret and my love for her is reduced to 30 per cent now.
Q. Dear reader, please I urgently need your help. There is this girl I've been dating for 18 months , but recently she told me q dirty secret of her to me.(she said she slept with a male politician in close to our college). I didn'r react violentl...
A. 17 March 2007: You haven`t said whether this happened while you were together with your girlfriend, or before you met her; but from the distress of your letter, I`m presuming that you two were at the time an item? You say she gave several reasons for it, we would ... (read in full...)
I found a girl's phone number in his pocket, do you think he's cheating on me?
Q. My boyfriend came home at 5 oclock in the morning. I found a girl's phone number in his pocket. Do you think he's been cheating on me?...
A. 17 March 2007: Let`s not jump to conclusions here! Ok, so he`s got a phone number in his pocket. How do you know it`s a girl`s, does it say her name? You`ll only find out what`s going on (if anything) if you ask him. But then you`ll have to explain what you were ... (read in full...)
Recently I've been wanting my boyfriend to physically and emotionally abuse me and I don't understand why???
Q. I need help, lately I have found myself falling out of love with my boyfriend, although he is the greatest guy in the world and I dont understand why. But the worrying thing is that I have recently wanted him to physically and emotionally abuse me, ...
A. 17 March 2007: Take "time out" from each other. Explain to him that right now your emotions arn`t making sense, and you`d like some time apart to figure things out. As you said that he`s a great guy, he will do his best to be understanding; but please tell him ... (read in full...)
He doesn't know what he wants in the future, one minute he wants to travel, then he wants kids then changes his mind...
Q. I've been going out with a lovely guy for 3 years. we even spent a year trravelling in Asia together. We get on really well but I don't know if he will ever commit to me? I don't even want to get married I just want to know that he thinks we have ...
A. 17 March 2007: This is a difficult one, which ultimately only you can decide. You say you know he loves you, and that you get on really well; but you haven`t said that you love him. Do you? Without knowing this, it`s hard to give advice. The fact that you`re even ... (read in full...)
Why does he not call me as much any more?
Q. hey, I've been with my boyfriend for 1 year 3 months now. It's a really good relationship, I know he loves me and he hates being apart from me and I really love him. He called me every night almost before christmas, it annoyed my parents a lot some ...
A. 15 March 2007: He has exams to study for, and so do you! Unless you want a guy who says "do you want fries with that?" for the rest of his life, give him space to swot up for his exams, (and you could do the same thing too). You could always suggest that you ... (read in full...)
Why am I like this? Why am I so clingy and dependant?
Q. I'm clingy. If I have seen my boyfriend for a few days/nights in a row I get upset when I don't see him the next day. I'm so clingy and I get really upset. Why am I so dependant. I also go the other way as well, if he hasn't slept over for a few ...
A. 15 March 2007: I agree with chachacha, I think you have low self esteem (worth); it would be great for you to build your confidence levels up. Also, like cha says, you`re still young! There is plenty of time for you to "find yourself", (I know it`s easy for us ... (read in full...)
How can I tell my mom we're engaged and living together... she'll freak if I tell her!
Q. Well I'm another female in a 20 year age difference relationship with my fiance, I'm 22 and he is 41. He's a wonderful guy, I met his family and friends and they're all happy for us once getting to know me and already knowing him. No he's not my ...
A. 15 March 2007: Mothers only ever want the best for their children, because it`s a bond that cannot ever be broken. As she does not know that you`re engaged, or that you have moved in together, I presume you don`t see your mom that often. I hope you keep in contact ... (read in full...)
A question for the men! Why is it a man is first with a woman he is so nice to them but once in a relationship for a while, become total jerks?
Q. Here's a question directed mainly toward the men out there, but ladies feel free to respond as well as I'm sure plenty of you know where I'm coming from on this. Why is it that when a man (or boy) decides that they want to be with a woman they are ...
A. 15 March 2007: Thanks for replying, it`s always great to have a Follow-Up!! I find it strange though, that you refer to your husband as your "Current Husband". I Hope you don`t refer to him in this way in front of others. Heather.... (read in full...)
A question for the men! Why is it a man is first with a woman he is so nice to them but once in a relationship for a while, become total jerks?
Q. Here's a question directed mainly toward the men out there, but ladies feel free to respond as well as I'm sure plenty of you know where I'm coming from on this. Why is it that when a man (or boy) decides that they want to be with a woman they are ...
A. 15 March 2007: Don`t let him get into a "Too Comfortable Zone!!" I consulted my husband on this one, and he said that for a man to be "comfortable" with a woman, he has to love her, and be easy in her company. I guess you`ve just been unlucky with men; There are ... (read in full...)
I'm a woman and the thought of gay men having intercourse really excites me, is this normal?
Q. I'm a 30 year old woman and the thought of gay men having intercourse really excites me. Is that normal? Seems kind of wierd to me, but I can't help feeling that way. I enjoy the thought of women being together as well, but not as much as the ...
A. 15 March 2007: Thinking and fantasising about sex and human bodies is entirely normal & healthy. Quite often, what we fantasise about, we wouldn`t do in real life. Lots of women, bi sexual or not, have thoughts about being with another woman; they know the female ... (read in full...)
He's behaved like a real gentleman towards me and now I feel so forward. Will he respect me less for this?
Q. Hello, I recently (6 weeks ago) started seeing a man a friend set me up with, He'd seen a picture of me and asked her to introduce us. We met up and hit it off straight away, but the problem was he quit his job 2 days before 1st meeting me and so d...
A. 15 March 2007: He wouldn`t have emailed and phoned you if he didn`t care! He dosn`t have to keep in contact; and the fact that he has shows you`ve nothing to worry about! When guys say they`ll ring, quite often it`s just a polite way of putting you down gently, ... (read in full...)
How do I keep myself under control without jeopardising our friendship?
Q. hi all, need your advice my husband and I have the same group of friends as we have been together for 12 years, we either all go out as a group or depending on events/shows etc, sometimes a couple of us go out on our own. The thing is though, ...
A. 15 March 2007: Eddie tells it how it is; and I agree with him wholeheartedly. The advice you read on here probably isn`t what you want to hear, judging from the fact that you have expressed no remorse for your totally selfish actions. Instead of asking our advice ... (read in full...)
she messaging guys and starting petty fights with me! Is she going off me?
Q. recently i think my girlfriend is going off me. she talks to other guys over the net a lot, and i know she is sending other guys messages. she flirts with them, i know for sure, as i have seen some of the messages she's sending. she has pretended in ...
A. 14 March 2007: It dosn`t sound like she`s worth hanging onto. Let her go (a firm push out of the door normally works), so she can latch onto her next victim. There`s someone NICE out there for you, so get looking & good luck! Kind Regards, Heather.... (read in full...)
My friend wants to date me but I'm not physically attracted to him. What can I do?
Q. I know there have been similar questions to this recently but I could really do some advice. I have a friend who has told me they like me more than a friend but im not sure how i feel about them as im not attracted to them physically. Howe...
A. 14 March 2007: Eve`s right, don`t even think about it. It`s nice that you said you don`t want to mess him about, that shows you`re not selfish in a "me me me" way. Enjoy your friendship with this guy, who knows, in time he could become one of your best buddies, ... (read in full...)
He's not that great looking and I like him,but he rejected me...I'm hurt!
Q. hi hope you can help there is this man i recently started to like hes a friend of my brothers he isnt typically good looking but to me he is i told him i liked him he was shocked said i was way out of his league so i thought i would ask him for a ...
A. 14 March 2007: I think it`s only your ego that is hurt. All his and your friends think "you`re too good looking for him"?? He should be flattered and jump at the chance?? You "told him where to go" when you were drunk. I think the guy`s had a lucky escape. ... (read in full...)
I'm heartbroken---how can he have fallen out of love with me so fast
Q. I'd really appreciate any feedback on this I can get. I'm 20 years old and I started my first proper relationship over a year ago at a new job I started. He was totally besotted with me.. couldnt take his eyes off me and stuttered whenever he sp...
A. 14 March 2007: From what you say, he sounds very immature. His family said how much he`d changed for the good since he met you; but now it seems he`s gone back to how he was before, whatever that was. Saying out of anger that he slept with another girl is just as ... (read in full...)
He's working away for a month, it's only been 2 weeks but I'm missing him so much!
Q. my fiance and I live together, we have done for the past 18 months, we spend all our time together, we dont get much due to work but when we are not working, we are always together. he's working away for a month and its only week 2 and i'm missing ...
A. 14 March 2007: Well, if its week 2, you`re halfway there! Hopefully the last two weeks will go quicker if you can keep busy; I understand it`s hard to concentrate on anything right now as you`re missing him so much, but with a teensy bit of effort, you could ... (read in full...)
How can I move on and find true happiness in a relationship?
Q. me and my exboyfreind have been talking on and off since our break up...We've done things a couple would like go out to eat...movies..etc....but never claimed ourselves as a couple during the break up period....I've had so0o0 much feelings for ...
A. 13 March 2007: Kenny`s right about meeting someone when you least expect it. If you go out dancing or clubbing, looking your best, you may meet someone, or may not. But when your hair needs washing, your jeans have a hole in one knee (not a designer one!) and ... (read in full...)
Am I upset that he never got the chance to be with her?
Q. I started dating my current boyfriend when I was 19 (I am now 25). We broke up a few times in between (over childish things). I got engaged and he lived with another girl but neither of those worked out. We're trying another go at as we still love ...
A. 13 March 2007: It sounds like there`s an awful lot going on here. You and him, him and her; it`s quite possible that you`re not the only one not sure of what`s going on. Is he getting mad at you for asking questions because you won`t let it drop, or because ... (read in full...)
She says she loves me but doesn't want to see me for a week! Any advice?
Q. My girlfriend says she loves and cares for me but our relationship doesn't feel good now she doesn't want to see me for a week. please help i don't know what to do....
A. 10 March 2007: You haven`t said why she dosn`t want to see you for a week, I don`t know if she told you why? On so little to go on, like the other aunts have said, maybe she needs some "time out", for whatever reason, and you should give her this (as long as this ... (read in full...)
I'm a male virgin and I need to know...how to stop masturbating to porn!
Q. How can i stop masterbating, im a male virgin, i watch porn all the time because it makes me feel relaxed. but i really want to stop, its controlling my life, i keep gatting hard ons everywhere. how can i stop????? ...
A. 10 March 2007: Like the other aunts say, get rid of, or at least cut down on the porn. You need to get out and about, meet people, REAL people! There are lots of ways to have a good time, stacks of great places to go, friends to make. Like you say, this has ... (read in full...)
How often do women think of their past sexual partners?
Q. I have general questions for women. How often do women think of their past sexual partners? I'm curious because my girlfriend seems to bring up(in converstaion) people she has slept with at random moments. ...
A. 9 March 2007: I`m not trying to put your mind at rest, but when you say your girlfriend seems to bring up (in conversation) people she has slept with at random moments; that`s all it is!! She hasn`t called out your name at intimate moments, and when she mentions ... (read in full...)
Do you think that men and women can be just "good friends"?
Q. My male friend and I hit it off immediately when we met through friends a couple of years ago. Since then we have become really good friends. We're constantly laughing, we're one of the first people we tell everything to, we confide in each other ...
A. 9 March 2007: Yes, Men & Women can be just "Good Friends". Each and Every one of us has a feminine & masculine side; normally one side being stronger than the other. Lot`s of women were tomboys as youngsters; and get on better with men in later life. Many men ... (read in full...)
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