I don't want to rekindle our affair but his son just died ...
Q. I ended an affair with a married man 6 months ago. 2 days ago, I found out his son passed away at 21 yrs old 1 day ago. Although I avoid all contact with him, I feel bad for his lost. I want to know shld I call and give my condolences. Something ...
A. 26 February 2012: Female "anon", you didn't think about his wife... the *Mother* of the son who died. She needs her husband's support for her loss as well, and you're advising that this woman go contact him and take him from his wife's side where he belongs, facing ... (read in full...)
I don't want to rekindle our affair but his son just died ...
Q. I ended an affair with a married man 6 months ago. 2 days ago, I found out his son passed away at 21 yrs old 1 day ago. Although I avoid all contact with him, I feel bad for his lost. I want to know shld I call and give my condolences. Something ...
A. 25 February 2012: No contact. He has a wife with which to experience these life altering things with. No one's forcing you to contact him, and you both have broken up. Sometimes, you have to let go.
... (read in full...)
I'm too self conscious to have sex.
Q. I havent had sex with my boyfriend yet but i'm worried about making a lot of noise during sex,like moaning and screaming and shouting lol.I'm also self conscious about my body.I really want to have sex with him but i dont know how to stop feeling ...
A. 25 February 2012: First of all, for the most part, that whole moaning, screaming, and wailing like a screech owl in heat is PORN stuff, and isn't real life. The truth is, you will respond as naturally as you do when you're speaking to someone.
As for your body, th... (read in full...)
I've never had an orgasm. I'm afraid I'll have to pee if I have one!
Q. I have never had an orgasm, I am sure of that. But from what I've read, I've been close many times. I always either stop myself (if masturbating) or my partner when I start feeling like I need to urinate because the feeling is too intense- it's not ...
A. 24 February 2012: Sorry, that last like should be "You'll wonder why you've waited so long to feel so good!".
It's late and I should be in bed!... (read in full...)
I've never had an orgasm. I'm afraid I'll have to pee if I have one!
Q. I have never had an orgasm, I am sure of that. But from what I've read, I've been close many times. I always either stop myself (if masturbating) or my partner when I start feeling like I need to urinate because the feeling is too intense- it's not ...
A. 24 February 2012: You're not going to pee. In fact, the mechanics of an orgasm actually closes off the urethra to ensure that urination doesn't occur, unless you're unhealthy.
Your clitoris and vaginal wall engorge with blood the same as a male penis is. A clitor... (read in full...)
Is my husbands coworker acting inappropriately?
Q. Hi, My husband has a coworker who likes to act like one of the guys. They are in sales in a construction related business. Sometimes he will "ride" with her for the day, even though it isn't required.. While I understand lots of men work with wom...
A. 24 February 2012: I was thinking about this, and you may have missed a golden opportunity when she called you out on not saying goodbye.
However, I think the chance will most definitely present itself again where she will either chafe on your nerves with obvious ... (read in full...)
Just over 40 and never been on a date, need advice to help me
Q. I am just a over 40 and have never been on a date with a woman. I think finally, I am starting to conquer my anxiety and other issues, which tend to make me a hermit. I want this to work so badly because I want a little of fun in my joyless ...
A. 24 February 2012: I think you shouldn't go it alone. You have internal issues that have blocked you from dating for at least 25 years, and force of will alone isn't enough, though I commend you on that force of will, because it got you to write here for advice. So, ... (read in full...)
Wife and I haven't had sex in a year, she says go somewhere else
Q. My wife and I have not had sex in almost a year now and I do not know what's wrong. I try to talk to her about it but can't get any straight answers. She says she still loves me but that I should go find someone else who will not only love me but ...
A. 24 February 2012: I actually don't think that leaving her would get her to change.
I do think this is a medical issue. Menopause and its ensuing havoc on hormones and desire does have treatments that can greatly help libido!
The remedy is twofold. There ... (read in full...)
Is my husbands coworker acting inappropriately?
Q. Hi, My husband has a coworker who likes to act like one of the guys. They are in sales in a construction related business. Sometimes he will "ride" with her for the day, even though it isn't required.. While I understand lots of men work with wom...
A. 23 February 2012: Yes, the co-worker is acting inappropriately, and if she's as you described, that would chafe me to no end.
You must make the distinction, however, between her and your husband. So far, *his* behavior has not been inappropriate. By all accounts... (read in full...)
PDA issues with my boyfriend, and jealous of his insanely beautiful ex! Any advice?
Q. Ok so have this amazing perfect boyfriend I have been dating off and on since 8th grade(we're in 10th now). I love him to death, we were even each others first kiss. currently this time our relationship has lasted since 2 days before thanksgiving ...
A. 23 February 2012: You want PDA to mark your territory to tell others to back off. I understand, but you have no cause to be insecure. If his ex were so perfect, why is she his ex? You should give more credit to yourself than you do.
As for PDA, you two hug, and... (read in full...)
He's sleeping on my couch and wants me back, but I want him to leave because I cant take it anymore! What should I do?
Q. I was 15 when I had my first child and 25 when I had my second and last. Shockingly enough (and I say 'shockingly' because I know how people are), they are both by the same father. However, we did not stay together throughout that ten year gap. We ...
A. 23 February 2012: I'm not trying to be harsh, but why are you even here asking for advice? You're not going to leave this guy. You will never leave him, you're always going to sabotage your life. You love and thrive on drama, and for all your time as a nurse, you ... (read in full...)
An argument over opening doors has led me to question my feelings for him, am I being crazy or over-sensitive?
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for just over a year. He's 46, I'm 43. I will admit, I have ignored some small "yellow flags", but there are many, many good qualities about him and I also know that there is no "perfect", that I, myself, am not ...
A. 23 February 2012: "If you give a woman an inch, they want a mile".
That right there is the statement of the year, but I'm going to get back to it in a moment.
Hmm, you've been dating for a year. He gets your car door still, which is very nice. Personally, I th... (read in full...)
Is it really "no big deal" for married women to have crushes on other men?
Q. I would really be interested in hearing from married women on this one. What does it mean when your wife seems to be very smitten with a husband of a couple we are becoming friends with? Do I have a right to be upset? Or, should I just relax and ...
A. 23 February 2012: I'll preface this by saying that as a rule, I am very unforgiving when it comes to cheating, and I'm very direct about ceasing behavior that could lead to cheating.
That being said, yes, it's common to develop passing crushes on people that we ... (read in full...)
Why don't men want to talk on the phone?
Q. I'm finding this so common with men I meet now, they refuse to talk on the phone. I met a great guy, we went out on 2 dates and had a blast together but we only communicate via text. At one point, I gave him a call but he didn't answer. When I heard ...
A. 22 February 2012: I would be suspicious at this point of someone else in their life. It's okay to not want to spend time on the phone, but a quick 2 minute "I just wanted to hear your voice" or even a short call to make plans is doable for even the most ... (read in full...)
Should I still be sleeping with my ex?
Q. My ex boyfriend and I broke up two months ago, but were still good friends. We hang out regularly and its not awkward at all. He will call me up just to chat, surprise me with dinner and ice cream and even bought me chocolates the other day. We s...
A. 22 February 2012: He doesn't want to hear about your feelings, yet wants you to initiate sex? It's not enough that he's using you, he wants the "girlfriend" experience too? What an asshat!
You will never get him back. He has lost respect for you, doesn't ... (read in full...)
After 10 months of being together, having sex, bf still hasn't said those 3 little words
Q. What if you and your boyfriend have been dating for 10 months then loose your virginity to each other and yet we still didn't say "I love you"? He believes to love someone you have to be with them for the rest of your life,but that was at the ...
A. 22 February 2012: I'd advise against you saying them first. The reason why is exactly because of what you said he places as meaning on those words.
The subject has come up before, or you wouldn't know that he thinks that declaring love is tantamount to proposin... (read in full...)
He ended it because he couldnt cope with other men looking at me, and then in the 7 days we were apart he got a new girlfriend!
Q. Thanks in advance for any advice given! I am in a sad place right now and really could do with some opinions from a mans point of view and also a womans if you have been in the same situation. Up until a couple of weeks ago I was dating a guy...
A. 22 February 2012: Ignore what he's said. Look at his actions.
He ran from you because he didn't want a relationship, and you did. He got upset because he had feelings for you he was scared of. Of course, people looking at you shouldn't upset him if he's only bei... (read in full...)
Whatever happened to amicably breaking up??!
Q. Hi guys. I have posted on here before recently. I have had a horrible time recently. Me and my bf broke up in December after I had a miscarriage in November. Basically he wasn’t really there for me and I was really going through it and I pretty much ...
A. 22 February 2012: This is a textbook reason why people shouldn't play house before marriage with the joint accounts and mortgages.
However, that statement doesn't help you now. Do not sign anything over to him. In fact, get a solicitor of your own to advise y... (read in full...)
Would you be put off a guy who said his son was "just a baby I made"?
Q. I'm dating a man who is a lot older than me, and he has a son who is a year younger than i am . He hasn't had much contact with his ex wife since they got divorced 23 years ago. He also hasn't seen his son much since his son was three years old. He ...
A. 22 February 2012: Oh my god. "Just a baby I made".
Would that make you "just a piece of ass he's f***ing"?
That guy is the reason why things were bad between him and his ex. If he can devalue his own flesh and blood like that, then he is a monster. Even ... (read in full...)
I ran from my ex girlfriend! Did I do the right thing?
Q. Hello. I had an encounter with my ex, on a city bus. Now, she's the dumper. I'm scared of her, as she lied to me, and such. Anyways, I got off the bus, and, I find out she got off at the same stop. Now, I attend the same school as her (But, thankf...
A. 22 February 2012: You know, in a way, you're on the right track. Subconsciously, you've identified that your ex is not a good thing for you, and up until now, you've avoided her in order to keep yourself from her.
Keeping yourself from her is good! However,... (read in full...)
Fiance called off our wedding and there was no warning! Help!
Q. Yesterday, my fiance called off our wedding. I never before believed the people who say 'It came totally out of the blue'. 'Surely', I used to think 'there must have been signs. Arguments, tensions, disagreements, pressure. Things that led ...
A. 22 February 2012: Boy, I read the original post and the answers, and I think I'm about to go against the grain here.
If this guy were my fiance, I were the age the OP is, and after 3 years, he called off the wedding due to anxiety, said he needed counseli... (read in full...)
I don't want to die without trying anal sex, so is it cheating if I hire a prostitute as my wife refuses to do this?
Q. Just something that I've been thinking about: My wife and I have been together for years. Like any other couple, we have boundaries and red flags in sex. Anal sex is a red flag for her. But I can't get it off of my mind! I don't want to die wit...
A. 22 February 2012: Would you consider it cheating if your wife wanted a sexual need met that she went somewhere else to meet?
Think about it. Envision your wife being pleasured by another man, and he's fulfilling her so much better than you are. Envision your wif... (read in full...)
Does he sound like a sociopath
Q. He and i were fwb in the past but we're just friends now. I went to see him at his place because he's going away for a month and we wanted to see each other before he left. We've always been pretty flirty around each other but nothing has happened ...
A. 20 February 2012: It's up to you to leave him.
It shouldn't even get to this point. Who gives a flying rat's behind whether he's right or wrong? YOU shouldn't be talking to him!
So leave him alone!... (read in full...)
How do I distance myself from a friend that only uses me?
Q. I am a 34 year old woman and I have a friend whom I really love. I just have one problem. I dont think he really cares for me and I need to seperate myself from him, I just dont know how. Everytime he ask me for something I do my best to get it for ...
A. 19 February 2012: HE's a USER! No real man would be asking a girl to pay for his trip! Put your pocketbook away! Don't give him another cent! No. No way. Not ever. Never. Not on your life.
Do not call him back. Let him pay for his own trip. Stop crying. ... (read in full...)
Ex and I slept together but he says he can't offer me a relationship right now
Q. Hello, I split up with S in Dec 2010 i just didnt feel close to him despite me loving him he was so hard to know?, hes not good at showing his feelings, we remained friends and went out as friends but i just didnt think he wanted a relationship with ...
A. 19 February 2012: You're friends? He's sleeping with you?
You're 37 and wasting your time with him. Time to cut your losses and break that chemical attachment to him once and for all, or you will be stuck in this rut.
This is why when you break up with so... (read in full...)
Does he sound like a sociopath
Q. He and i were fwb in the past but we're just friends now. I went to see him at his place because he's going away for a month and we wanted to see each other before he left. We've always been pretty flirty around each other but nothing has happened ...
A. 19 February 2012: I don't know if he's a sociopath, and I'm not a licensed psychologist. I do know that he's a jerk and a user of women. However, I must point out something here.
What in God's name are you doing?!?
First of all, you should not be friends or in... (read in full...)
It's really disappointing that my boyfriend isn't coming to see me perform anymore!
Q. i am a musician and i perform on weekends. my boyfriend used to always come watch me perform and it really was the sweetest thing. i felt really good knowing he was there supporting me but the last few weeks, he has chosen not to go to my ...
A. 18 February 2012: You didn't mention how long you've been with him?
You also didn't mention what his job is? Does he work all week? If he's a musician, does he also perform weekends or during the week? Is he a student? What is his schedule like?
Video g... (read in full...)
Why can't a married woman be a good friend to an ex-lover?
Q. we are coworker and she is married, i love her truely from the heart still i think about her 24hrs may be she will talk to my like a close good friend (not expected kisses etc) but close friendship as she earlier have with me . sometimes i think ...
A. 16 February 2012: She can't be friends with you, and you shouldn't be friends with her precisely because you still have feelings for her. The fact that you are an ex-lover disqualifies you from trying to make a friendship with her.
Think of it this way -- what if ... (read in full...)
I'm tired of being the only responsible adult in this relationship
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for over 2.5 years. We have a 21 month year old together. We hardly ever get along. I feel unappreciated. I stayed home and collected unemployment even though I wanted to work so I can watch our son while she went to ...
A. 16 February 2012: I don't resent a guy who doesn't work. We do what we have to in order to run the family. If the better and more practical option for the moment is that a guy stays home while a girl doesn't, there's nothing to resent as long as the best interests ... (read in full...)
I'm lucky to "get lucky" once a week...
Q. My fiance and I have been together for seven and a half years. During the past two months, he has been showing symptoms of hypothyroidism..such as hair loss in patches, dizzy spells, fatigue, and most concerning, lack of libido. We used to have sex ...
A. 16 February 2012: hmm...you may want to marry someone else, because those things don't go away, especially if his porn use is interfering with his sex life. I'm not usually one to defend a medical issue interfering with a sex life, but I've dealt with anemia and ... (read in full...)
I'm tired of being the only responsible adult in this relationship
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for over 2.5 years. We have a 21 month year old together. We hardly ever get along. I feel unappreciated. I stayed home and collected unemployment even though I wanted to work so I can watch our son while she went to ...
A. 16 February 2012: Are you serious??? You made that son! You want a medal because you stayed home to watch him?? She went to beauty school in order to get a job to better the family. You were also a full time student, so what's the problem?
You were getting ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend told me I act weird when I receive blow jobs
Q. My girlfriend of 6 months is 12 years younger than I am, but very much more sexually experienced than I me. I got married young and I have only been with two women in my life while she is very adventurous and loves sex. She is also blessed with bei...
A. 14 February 2012: Heh, you know...for someone who is said to have much more sexual experience than you, her comment betrays her inexperience, to be honest. She's been used to guys who are unexpressive, and you really get into it.
First of all, there is NOTHING ... (read in full...)
His balding is becoming such an obsession lately...how do I get him to embrace it?
Q. I have been dating my guy for hitting 2 years now. I am 29, he is 35. His hair is thinning, just as it was when I first met him. It has become such an obsession with him over the last six months, and its driving me nuts. He has stopped going out ...
A. 12 February 2012: I agree with those who say that the best thing to do is just to back off and let him deal with how he feels about his hair. He is grappling with a change in image. All you can do is show him that your love for him doesn't and won't abate, no ... (read in full...)
Do I suggest our St Valentines day outing first, or wait for her to text me?
Q. So, I've been on two dates with a girl now, last week Sunday and Friday this week. The first was good, walk and coffee, last around 4 hours. Second we played snooker, then had dinner, Chinese, her favourite. I chose the second, she did the firs...
A. 12 February 2012: You should STOP texting and CALL her. You want to keep seeing her? Call to ask her out on Valentines day.
The both of you texted two days ago. Texting is for those in an established relationship to touch base. It is not to be for a guy who'... (read in full...)
I am against drinking but b/f has started to drink! How do I deal with this?
Q. I was wondering, how much action i should take or not take with my boyfriend and alcohol. hear me out. I was raised in a very religious home, i have never even SEEN alcohol outside of TV/ads/in the store. In highschool, I never was around t...
A. 12 February 2012: First of all, I could debate with you for 6,000 words on the rightness or wrongness of alcohol. Just because YOU believe it's wrong doesn't make it wrong. So you have no moral grounds to feel as if you're in a more moral place than your boyfriend ... (read in full...)
How can I encourage him? My boyfriend is not affectionate
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for almost two months. We have only held hands once. I just find it wierd that he does not want to hold my hand, hug, or kiss me. I try to hint to him that I want him to hold my hand, but I don't think he gets...
A. 11 February 2012: Two months? That's not a good sign.
If he's not affectionate in public or private, you may have a problem. Hinting isn't going to do it. You may want to have a kind-hearted, loving, but direct talk about the subject.
Be prepared to acce... (read in full...)
Retrospective jealousy!
Q. I've been dating a woman seriously for close to a year. I recently found out she had slept with a few guys I know (I wouldn't say they're my close friends, but we run in the same circles.) When I asked if she had been with them, she responded by...
A. 11 February 2012: If you've been sexually active before you met her, then you're exactly the same as she is. She has a past, and so do you.
How do you deal with it? You don't. You enjoy the present, not dissect her past!... (read in full...)
Is masturbation harmful to a man around 80 years old??
Q. is masterbation harmful for an old man,say 80 years old? ...
A. 11 February 2012: No way! it's good for him!... (read in full...)
Every time I ask my partner to change positions or try something different, he goes limp!
Q. I have been engaged since mid september and my fiancé and I truly love each other. There is one problem. Every time I ask him to change positions or say lets try this... He goes limp and can't get up for like a hour if it at all. I always say it ...
A. 11 February 2012: hmm....usually, that's psychological. Subconsciously (or consciously!), he may take what you say as a questioning of his manhood, whether he wants to or not.
You might want to rephrase it. Take it a step farther than "asking him nicely".... (read in full...)
Do men find thinning hair in women a turn off?
Q. Ok, this question is more for the guys I guess. Is a woman with thinning hair/bald completely unattractive and undesirable? I have always had thin hair, it's genetic, both parents have thin hair, with some thinning, and my grandpa was bald, my ...
A. 10 February 2012: There are so many solutions to thinning hair for a woman. I have a good friend who owns a multi-million dollar hair restoration center, and he says that many of his clients are women. There are remedies which include medication, surgery, hybrid ... (read in full...)
When I asked my FWB partner not to have sex with her disgusting ex because I don't want to end up contracting a disease, she thought I was accusing her. Did I do the right thing?
Q. So I had a fwb thing with going on with someone and she said how much she hated her ex and what not and her ex did act like a complete dick. He even at one point seemed to be bragging to her how he's having sex with so many women and doing meth (I ...
A. 10 February 2012: I agree with everyone on here.
She has the right to sleep with 625 other men if you and she are FWB. Wear a fricken CONDOM if you're worried about disease.
Otherwise, if you're really worried about disease, then don't even ever think about... (read in full...)
Should I contact my ex? I still miss him and can't get closure
Q. Should I call or send a text to my ex bf. I miss Him so much. He ended it almost 3 months ago and I still don't know y. He said I was being to needy bt I was js showing concern for him and his family. I cry all the time cz I really love him. I want ...
A. 10 February 2012: I'll make this short and sweet:
HE ended it with you.
This means that he wants it to be over with you.
You crying all the time is the VERY reason why you shouldn't contact him again.
If his reason for breaking up with you was that yo... (read in full...)
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