Should I contact my ex? I still miss him and can't get closure
Q. Should I call or send a text to my ex bf. I miss Him so much. He ended it almost 3 months ago and I still don't know y. He said I was being to needy bt I was js showing concern for him and his family. I cry all the time cz I really love him. I want ...
A. 10 February 2012: I'll make this short and sweet:
HE ended it with you.
This means that he wants it to be over with you.
You crying all the time is the VERY reason why you shouldn't contact him again.
If his reason for breaking up with you was that yo... (read in full...)
Maybe I do lack empathy but has my girlfriend's moaning gone beyond the norm?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together 3 years, living together for one. We have good times, we have a healthy relationship in most aspects, but by god there is a problem. She moans and whinges and goes hysterical on a fairly regular basis. ...
A. 9 February 2012: You've been together three years. I wonder if she's been like that the whole time, but now your feelings for her have receded to the point where her faults are becoming a more stark reality.
For you to use the words "moan" and "whine" and "goe... (read in full...)
Met a guy whilst wearing coloured contact lenses, will he think I'm fake if he finds out? What do guys think of girls who wear coloured lenses?
Q. Honest answers from guys, I don't care if they are hurtful I need to know a truthful answer. What do you think of girls who wear coloured lenses? Do you not care so much, think they're fake, find them attractive.. what? Because I met this guy whi...
A. 9 February 2012: It's not fake, nor is it lying unless you say that that's your natural eye color. It's something you wear to enhance beauty. Colored contacts are no more a lie than dying your hair, breast implants, or makeup!
If you feel you want to tell him... (read in full...)
Is making love different from other sex?
Q. Tonight I met my lover, who is a married woman. We have been together 2.5 years. I am not married and she has told me in the past that she does not plan to leave her husband. She seemed very eager to see me. She gave me a very thorough and nau...
A. 9 February 2012: I agree. You have to be *in* love to truly "make love".
I don't care how much flaming I get on this thread, but she is married with no plans to leave her husband. I wonder if he would make plans to leave her if he knew she was with you. After 2... (read in full...)
A guy online sends me raunchy messages. Should I stop talking to him?
Q. Ok so i met this guy in a Chatroom and he seems really nice but he's 21 and I'm 16 he texts me kind of raunchy stuff like where he wants to have sex with me but I told him I'm a virgin and he lives in NY and Im in Ohio he says he wants to hook up ...
A. 8 February 2012: Deathbunny, the guy would have to be no older than 36 months and also a minor. The fact that he's 60 months older and 21 negates the Ohio age of consent.
In NY, the age of consent is 17, and a perpetrator 21 and older faces felony charges ... (read in full...)
Our eight year relationship just broke up. Lost and sad. What can I do? .how do I get rid of hope?
Q. Hi everyone ive been asking many questions about my 8 year relationship ending just recently. we were 14 when we met and broke up at 22. I realy love her so so much and want to be with her because she is an amazing person, almost like we dese...
A. 8 February 2012: The last thing you ever want to do is to give up hope. However, you have to divert it. Instead of focusing on what you just lost and hoping she returns to you, you must hope for your own happiness. You've gotta hold on to the fact that if this ... (read in full...)
I'm in a horrible, controlling relationship, and I want to get out, but I cant!
Q. Okay. So this is going to be quite long but here goes. .... Iv been with my boyfriend 3 years. We live together. I love him, and iv got strong beliefs about relationships, I'm not the kind of person to just walk out on them. I'm by no means perfect. ...
A. 8 February 2012: He threatened to kill you unless you had an abortion.
This guy is scary. You should walk away. No, you should run away and get a lot of help, because if he's already threatening your life, it should be taken seriously.
You need to walk awa... (read in full...)
A guy online sends me raunchy messages. Should I stop talking to him?
Q. Ok so i met this guy in a Chatroom and he seems really nice but he's 21 and I'm 16 he texts me kind of raunchy stuff like where he wants to have sex with me but I told him I'm a virgin and he lives in NY and Im in Ohio he says he wants to hook up ...
A. 8 February 2012: You are jailbait in the U.S. The age of consent is 18, and if this 21 year old were to have sex with you, a 16 year old, it would be statutory rape.
Even now, he's committing a felony by soliciting sex from a minor.
Now, the legal crap out o... (read in full...)
Surprise 50th birthday party and his wife didn't invite his Mother, how to deal with her!
Q. Hi Guys I have a situation which isn't about a relationship, it's more a family situation and I was just hoping you guys might be able to help me. My brother just turned 50 years old, and his wife put on a surprise birthday party for him, and she...
A. 8 February 2012: BACK UP!!!!!!
Your SIL told your mother that she WISHES her 5 year old nephew were DEAD?! She was serious about wanting this kid to die???
And your main issue is a birthday party?!? Why isn't the issue your SIL's horrendous and really terri... (read in full...)
I've completely ruined the most amazing thing I ever had just because I freaked out!
Q. I met this amazing guy and we seemed to hit it off from the start. We spent every day together, having fun just doing anything..we just enjoyed each other's company no matter what we were doing. He told me all the time how much he loved me, how am...
A. 8 February 2012: Talk to him. And talk to him some more. And talk to him some more! And then talk some more!
The only way you will get what you want back is to become emotionally VULNERABLE. You need to think about why you freaked, and you need to tell him... (read in full...)
I want to do things with my best friend's older brother don't want her to find out!
Q. okay so , I am falling for my bestfriends brother and he is 2 years older than me. the thing is that he sent a picture to me and we really like each other , my beatfriend (his sister) found out about pictures we've sent before and she didn't talk to ...
A. 8 February 2012: Yeah, first of all, your best friend's brother is wanting sex, not you. If both of you were really truly into each other, it wouldn't be a secret. You would have had a conversation with your best friend and would have told her that you and her ... (read in full...)
He's eager to get me pregnant, but not walk me down the aisle?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. We're both divorced. I'm in my early 30's and he's in his early 40's. At the top of our relationship, I thought we were both on the same page of finding someone again to commit to and get ...
A. 8 February 2012: He's still shell shocked from the last divorce. He must have taken a major financial hit, hence his reason for wanting a child without a marriage.
You need to put your foot down. You want a child within a marriage. No substitutions or exceptio... (read in full...)
How can my FWB partner accuse me of cheating when we aren't together?
Q. Ok so I went out at the weekend a man that I have been having sex with for 11 months was working on the doors as a doorman this is some background so you know the full story you might understand why I did what I did we met nearly a year ago I really ...
A. 8 February 2012: That's exactly it. He wants a FWB with you, but he doesn't want you to see anyone else.
First of all, stop feeling guilty right now. You did nothing wrong. A FWB is NOT a relationship. You owe him nothing, and he owes you nothing. If he wants... (read in full...)
Help ladies please! I'm petrified about my first smear test and need support please?
Q. I am 23 and I am having my first smear test Thursday, I am absolutely petrified, im shaking thinking about it, can anyone give me advice I hope im not the only one that feels like this?...
A. 7 February 2012: Oh, it sucks, to be sure, but not in any way that's terrifying!
I'm guessing you've never had sex before, if you're having your first pap smear? If I'm incorrect, and you are sexually active, then this will be a breeze.
The doctor takes som... (read in full...)
Affair with husband's brother, and husband is okay with it.
Q. My brother-in-law (husband's brother) and I have started to engage in an affair. It started about a month ago. Initially after we first had sex, he was feeling so guilty that he said he never wanted it to happen again. I also felt guilty for what ...
A. 7 February 2012: Umm...
You should be pretty terrified by now, unless you're intending to leave your husband for your brother all along.
Here's why I say this:
Your husband wouldn't dream of letting you have an affair with his brother. Affairs like t... (read in full...)
I'm a nerd but I want a girlfriend
Q. Hey guys, (and girls). I just need an opinion or a few tips for this question. Alright. I really don't know how to start this, so I guess I'll just say it as quick as I can. I'm a nerd, I want to be in a relationship with a girl, and everyone in ...
A. 7 February 2012: Hey -- what kind of nerd are you? There are different kinds.
There are brainiac nerd who are more into academics than appearances, and then there are the "unhygienic nerds" who don't shower, smell like BO, and are greasy and weird.
From yo... (read in full...)
B/f left me on a dark street by myself and he knows how terrified I am of this kind of situation!
Q. Just a quick question! What would you do if your boyriend left you in the dark on the street by your self? Ill give you a bit more detail, i', having doubts if my boyfriend acctually does love me, he says he does so much and i acctually started to ...
A. 6 February 2012: You know how to break up with him? Two words. "We're THROUGH". No fanfare, no arguing, no trying to get an apology for him, because this scumbag doesn't deserve it. If he did that -- left you alone in the middle of the night while he ran... (read in full...)
A married man continues to pursue me even after I decline
Q. I am working on a divorce. My husband cheated on me with another woman. I'm being honest, it hurts bad. I did meet a friend only to find out he is married too. I am angry and of course we are not together anymore. This stupid married man keep...
A. 6 February 2012: With this married guy, tell him that if he ever calls, texts, or otherwise communicates with you ever again, you'll tell his wife. That should stop him cold.
As for you, technically, if your divorce isn't yet finalized, you're still married.... (read in full...)
Guitar solos turn me on? Does anyone else have any strange turn ons?
Q. Oh gosh, this is kinda strange but I've just recently realized that guitar solos really turn me on.. more than porn or anything else. It's so strange.. does this sort of thing happen to anyone else? Not just with guitar solos, but anything? lol I ...
A. 6 February 2012: Heh, I had the image of you making out with your boyfriend, and Slash entering the room with his axe. Next thing you know, all three of you are in bed -- you and your boyfriend holding each other all spent and sweaty. Slash with his guitar looking ... (read in full...)
Dealing with a boyfriend who acts like a frat boy when he's with his friends
Q. Hello everyone, My b/f and I have been together a little over three years, and we are both in our mid to late twenties. Everything generally goes well except he is sometimes very immature. I am usually very tolerant of his immature humor, ...
A. 6 February 2012: Well, I'd say that he has every right to act like a frat boy, and I'd even encourage it, as life's a hard grind out there!
However, strip clubs? It's one thing to act like a frat boy. It's quite another to act like a SINGLE frat boy. You have... (read in full...)
Surprise 50th birthday party and his wife didn't invite his Mother, how to deal with her!
Q. Hi Guys I have a situation which isn't about a relationship, it's more a family situation and I was just hoping you guys might be able to help me. My brother just turned 50 years old, and his wife put on a surprise birthday party for him, and she...
A. 6 February 2012: I too wonder what kind of surprise party it was. If other relatives were invited, and it was a "family" function where the mom was intentionally slighted while other relatives were invited, then I agree, it was a completely nasty thing to do, and ... (read in full...)
I lied to my boyfriend but now that I have come clean and am telling the truth he doesn't trust me
Q. I lied to my boyfriend about my online- activities prior to us moving in together. When he found out, I denied it, then I changed my story and told him what I was doing (emblishing the facts as I thought it was what he wanted to hear), I then took ...
A. 6 February 2012: You know, if your focus is on getting HIM to trust you again, then you have the wrong focus, and you're still going down the wrong path.
Here's why I say this -- this isn't about you lying. This is about the activities to begin with while yo... (read in full...)
Why did he suddenly start ignoring me after a night of affection?
Q. I've really liked this boy at my school for nearly a year now, but we haven't spoken much. I became friends with him in september as he seems like such a lovely, funny guy. Last night i was at friends party/gathering and i spoke to him quite al...
A. 5 February 2012: First of all, at 13-15, you are WAY too young to be drinking! Don't drink anymore, as it causes you to lose inhibitions are in place to protect you!
Second of all, if the guy was the same age as you, he's not ready to have any sort of relation... (read in full...)
Help!!! How do I let him down gently without hurting him?
Q. Hey guys, short story this really sweet and caring guy and I met a while ago, we started talking, flirting, texting, hanging out etc, and now his feelings have grown stronger for me, while mine have done the opposite. I have realised that my...
A. 5 February 2012: Well, best thing to do is let him down gently as soon as possible. The longer you put it off, the harder for him it'll be.
Do not soften the blow, yet don't be cruel. Don't talk about "just being friends", don't negotiate when he protests... (read in full...)
Why are men who don't like a certain kind of woman accused of being gay?
Q. I've noticed something over the years and even more so recently that I find to be rather unsettling. It's true that a lot of men like to go to strip clubs, look at porn with famous porn stars in it, and ogle women in public who resemble someone you ...
A. 5 February 2012: What kind of types of women are you talking about???
Heh, if you're attracted to a woman who society deems that you shouldn't be attracted to, then pardon my language, but F*** society! You find beautiful who you find beautiful.
Society does ... (read in full...)
I regret being so shallow about a guy's height
Q. I turned down an opportunity to be with a guy who was committed and a good person. The main reason I walked away because of his height. He is 5 ft. I am the same height and petite. All I can think about is the life we could have had together. Bu...
A. 5 February 2012: You know, I had "tall" as a prerequisite too. Funny how I got married to a guy exactly as tall as I am who I don't really wear heels around. And this guy is the absolute love of my life now. I no longer care about height, because in my eyes, my ... (read in full...)
How can I learn to overcome homosexuality?
Q. Hi cupid, quick question. I think I might be gay but I don't want to be. Nowadays when people say they are gay everybody jumps up saying its ok and that you're born that way and we don't have a choice and stuff like that but I don't think I believe ...
A. 5 February 2012: I'll start off by saying that I'm not judging you. What I'm about to say to you has not one bit of malice, nor scolding. What I hope to do is open your eyes a bit on who you are.
First, to compare homosexuality to smoking, drinking, or other un... (read in full...)
Will I have to choose between a girl and my friends?
Q. I'll try and keep this as short as possible. During high school, I had a massive crush on a close female friend of mine. We were good friends for a few years but I was never able to tell her how I felt, for two reasons. The first being that I was...
A. 5 February 2012: That's a very good question, but I think you've already made the choice. The question should have been asked before you asked her out. Now, it's in motion. Your friends are already angry, and going back on the date will not change it. All it ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is so overbearing I cant even pick up a newspaper with an attractive woman in it! Now she has started commenting on my friend's Facebook too, how do I deal with her?
Q. Hi guys and gals, My gf is getting a little overbearing and insecure... She accuses me of constantly hurting her when i pick up a magazine or newspaper and theres an image of a beautiful woman in a suggestive or sexy pose. She snatches the maga...
A. 5 February 2012: You must never, and I mean NEVER compensate for what someone's ex put her through. You do not have to make up for what they did, or you will resent it.
I still think you should run.... (read in full...)
I want intimacy in a relationship and don't know where to start
Q. I'm in the process of making changes in my life and I need help figuring out how to have the types of relationships that I want but have missed out on. I don't have any friends I can talk to about this and I can't afford therapy. I am a 29 year...
A. 4 February 2012: You're 26-29 years old? Dude! You're STILL YOUNG! And your problem isn't that you can't have someone in your life, it's where and what you've been looking for up 'til now!
You've been going for long distance and online girlfriends. Sure, it... (read in full...)
Do I have the right to ask to see my boyfriend's check stubs?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been living together for 6 months and in the beginning he was not employed. The agreement was that he would pay me XX amount of dollars until he went back to work. After he got a new job, then we would revisit the money ...
A. 4 February 2012: I hate to keep repeating myself, and even as I type this, I have a sinking feeling that nothing I say is going to get through to you. Please understand that I'm telling you this to protect you and what is yours.
If you are a business owner, I... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is so overbearing I cant even pick up a newspaper with an attractive woman in it! Now she has started commenting on my friend's Facebook too, how do I deal with her?
Q. Hi guys and gals, My gf is getting a little overbearing and insecure... She accuses me of constantly hurting her when i pick up a magazine or newspaper and theres an image of a beautiful woman in a suggestive or sexy pose. She snatches the maga...
A. 3 February 2012: You deal with her by breaking up with her. It's one thing to be insecure, it's another to slander your name in public and on Facebook and tarnish you in front of yours and her friends. There is something seriously wrong with her, and simply ... (read in full...)
I gave him a deposit but never bought the car, now he wants to keep 20% of the money! Is this legal or should I take him to court?
Q. Hi,i hope someone has a good advice for me in this case.I wanted to buy a car from owner but i did not have enough money.i saw the car and i talk to the owner about it;he ask me to give him what i have and i can bring him the rest and take the car ...
A. 3 February 2012: Take him to conciliation court immediately. You have a receipt for money and no contract that he keeps a portion of it. You can argue the case in court for a nominal filing fee, and it's worth it to fight for it.
Save all correspondence in writi... (read in full...)
How do I manage how I feel over his over zealous anxious checking up on me all the time?
Q. Hi All, thanks for stopping by and reading this. I have been dating a man for coming up to year now. he has lots going on his life. Eg: he is a full time carer for his disabled sister, and has three kids from an ex that he takes a lot ( they don...
A. 3 February 2012: This whole dynamic sounds kind of weird, and quite frankly, I want to know this guy's game.
He makes you feel needy and clingy for wanting to see him more than once or twice per week, yet when you become distant, he calls and texts you constant... (read in full...)
No double standard - I just want one off sex
Q. I'd like advice about meeting with a guy I met online. To lead up to this question, I must explain I've only been in long lasting relationships since I was 15. I've never really been single. My ex cheated on me last month and I'm still upset, but my ...
A. 3 February 2012: I agree with you about the double standard thing, and if you're interested in no-strings-attached sex, no reason you shouldn't have it.
I worry a bit about grabbing a guy off the internet, precisely because you don't know what kind of baggage ... (read in full...)
Frustrated, straight, but considering an offer of a bj
Q. Hey I got a question. Im a 28 year old man living single and my job keeps me extremely busy and always on the travel. Over the last couple years I have developed a male friend shom I met over the internet from a town that is about 40 miles from ...
A. 3 February 2012: If you're curious about being with this guy, go for it! You're not dating anyone else, and if you're interested, why not?
I will give you something to think about though before you make your decision. If you're still looking for a woman to... (read in full...)
I feel like I owe it to my husband to have a threesome.
Q. My husband has been wanting a threesome with another women, i was for it at first but after his pushing and searching I started to have my insecruities. I feel tho, it needs to happen. I was unfaithful to him. I kissed a guy. (it might not see...
A. 3 February 2012: Here's the thing. You're focusing your guilt in the wrong direction. Just because you kissed someone else doesn't mean that you are obligated to agree to a threesome.
If you want to act on your guilt, the best thing to do is to focus on your mar... (read in full...)
I messed up in life and went down the wrong road, but now I'm a changed man and I want my girlfriend back!
Q. Hey so me and my girlfriend are broken up we were together for 8 years. I moved out so this is very serious.ive been given the old its not u its me excuse but i cant stop but thinking i know exactly what went wrong. i smoked pot all the time and i ...
A. 2 February 2012: Two weeks feels like forever, but it's only a drop in the bucket, and not enough to have really changed. I know you feel very strong emotions that you feel are changing you, but not until you have stopped smoking weed and changed the course of your ... (read in full...)
Do I have the right to ask to see my boyfriend's check stubs?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been living together for 6 months and in the beginning he was not employed. The agreement was that he would pay me XX amount of dollars until he went back to work. After he got a new job, then we would revisit the money ...
A. 2 February 2012: Holy crap! Are you serious??? I'm a business owner too, and this is outrageous that you're even thinking like this!
If you truly own a business, then the bills are the bills. They don't change whether you have more profits or losses. You pay ... (read in full...)
More porn = less sex. What's not to get?
Q. Just wanted to put an opinion out there... I have posted questions and answers about porn, spoken to girlfriends and read endless articles about men and womens views on porn. One thing seems glaringly obvious yet so often overlooked by me...
A. 2 February 2012: Women do not get a man's sex drive, plain and simple. There's no way on earth we can compare the physiology and psychology to our own. We can't comprehend that the way we feel having gone a month without sex is the same way a guy feels three DAYS ... (read in full...)
My wife had a termination 6 months into our relationship, and now 7 and a half years later the sex is still terrible!
Q. Hi, me and my first love have just got married 5months ago, we have been together for 8 years nearly and have never slept or even been out with anyone else! We are only in our early and mid 20's. For the first year the sex was great and very ...
A. 31 January 2012: She had a termination which for her was a devastating and extremely traumatic event. Subconsciously, she bundles sex with what caused her extreme pain. You didn't mention how you and she got pregnant in the first place, but if you failed to "pull ... (read in full...)
More porn = less sex. What's not to get?
Q. Just wanted to put an opinion out there... I have posted questions and answers about porn, spoken to girlfriends and read endless articles about men and womens views on porn. One thing seems glaringly obvious yet so often overlooked by me...
A. 31 January 2012: Of course, there's the obvious response to your post is:
If porn use by the man does *not* upset the wife/girlfriend, then the amount of sex will be unchanged.
However, if the porn use is way over the top and obsessive, then it'll interfere ... (read in full...)
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