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... Send *irdynumnums a private message | | | *irdynumnums's profile:I am old enough to know Not answer how old I am, wise enough to Not presume that I know all the answers, have lived in enough countries Not to assume any prejudices - and my Husband, Children and my love of Art make me tick. Have recently become a sailor and am swashbuckling on the high seas. Argh! *raising pirate hook*
Be careful what you Think, Thoughts become Words.
Be careful what you Say, Words become Actions.
Be careful what you Do, Actions will Define your Character.
...and Your Character will Determine your Destiny.
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| Latest articles: Tips for New Parents!
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
23 July 2009: One of our agony aunts is going to have a baby soon, so I thought it might be nice to send her our best wishes and our tips, the practices on parenting that we have learned from our experiences! I'll start the ball rolling - - If you don't want a...
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Can anyone give me tips on making my guy scream with pleasure in bed!?
Q. Well, another question... since I'm new in this thing called "SEX", I'm so curious, I've give my boyfriend blow jobs, normal thing I know, but the thing is that I don't feel like I'm giving him enough pleasure, when he is doing it to me I'm desperat...
A. 24 January 2008: Yep. I think the only way that my husband would actually scream in bed is if I were to wait until he is ready, and then tell him I dented his car... Most guys grunt - that's about it. I guess we're the peacocks in that department too! ... (read in full...)
Do his reasons for masturbating to his exes picture sound valid?
Q. i am in a relationship with a 29 year old man (i am 41). we've had a very good relationship in and out of the bedroom thus far. however i found out recently that he has been masturbating to old nude photos of a very recent ex-girlfriend. what the ...
A. 24 January 2008: An old photograph of his ex, with clothes on, is just an old memory and probably should be tolerated.
BUT a NUDE photo of his ex should have been thrown out the moment their relationship died. It's not healthy for him, and I can't imagine that... (read in full...)
Concerned my mom is getting married too fast. What do you think?
Q. My mother and I live in different states, about 1000 miles apart. She began dating a new man in early December and told me how great he was and she was very happy. She continually said that they were going to take this slow. She decided to come ...
A. 24 January 2008: Have you considered visiting her? If it were my Mom, I'd want to know that she was going to be alright. I'm sure that things can happen this quickly, but I would also worry about her financial security. Frankly, if it's possible, I would hop on a ... (read in full...)
Is this girl jealous of me?
Q. Is She Jealous? This girl at my school in high school keeps calling me a slut i am a virgin and all but she conitues to call me a slut now like in jr.high and i am really sick and tired of it. I know I'm not a slut but what do i do about this gi...
A. 24 January 2008: Violence never solves anything. Unfortunately, there are always going to be people in your life that seem to be put there to challenge and vex you. The best thing that you could possibly do is laugh at her whenever she makes her comments. If she ... (read in full...)
Can anyone give me tips on making my guy scream with pleasure in bed!?
Q. Well, another question... since I'm new in this thing called "SEX", I'm so curious, I've give my boyfriend blow jobs, normal thing I know, but the thing is that I don't feel like I'm giving him enough pleasure, when he is doing it to me I'm desperat...
A. 24 January 2008: I'm not sure guys scream as much as we do... Can we here from some guys out there?... (read in full...)
13 and havent had my period...is this normal??
Q. Hi i'm 13 and i haven't had my period yet. Is this bad? also even if i haven't had my period masturbation is still ok right?...
A. 24 January 2008: Masturbation is fine whether or not you have started you period yet.
I had one period at age nine - and then didn't start my periods on a regular basis until I was 14 1/2. That just shows you how very different we all are! Don't worry, it will... (read in full...)
How long does the average orgasm last?
Q. This is an unusual question but ok.. How long does an average orgasm last????? Because mine seem to finish within seconds, is that normal?? thanks for answering....
A. 24 January 2008: Absolutely normal! If they lasted any longer, it would be unbearable, don't you think?... (read in full...)
Am I being too soft?
Q. I have just had a really tough year in my marriage. Here is a brief history: My husband walk out after a few months of marriage, devastated I then let my job, started a new life, he asked me back after 4 months, i went back, we then move abroad, i ...
A. 23 January 2008: BOTH of you aren't really acting like you are in a Marriage, you are acting like you are in a relationship. eyeswideopen nailed it with the "Wither thou goest, I shall go". You both made vows to love each other through all the possible highs and ... (read in full...)
How can I drop him a hint?
Q. hi theres this guy who has told me he likes me and he knws i like him. we are on the same course at university, he has asked of rmy number and we txt frm time to time etc. but he is just not making any moves, my friends say he is shy around me et...
A. 23 January 2008: Ask him out! The next time he texts you, tell him to meet you!!! For a coffee or a hamburger, whatever. You are so lucky - you already know the answer to your question - 'cause you already know that he likes you. Now, you just have to get a bit ... (read in full...)
I'm curious - is a vibrator better than a penis?
Q. Hi I am considering getting a vibe. I orgasm readily anyway with my partner who is attentive so don't need it to achieve orgasm. How much better is the orgasm is the intensity different or the length? Or is it preety much the same? Thanks!...
A. 23 January 2008: The orgasm is about the same! There are plenty of on-line toy shops that will ship them discreetly to your home, and you can even ask how they are packaged if that is a concern to you. There are an absolutely ridiculous amount of sizes, shapes, ... (read in full...)
Should I do it for him or stick to my principles?
Q. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost a year now and suddenly he wants a threesome. Its been talked about before but never this seriously. Ive been involved in one (MMF) in my single days and he says that it bothers him that ive ...
A. 23 January 2008: How odd that he didn't want to do a threesome with another guy...
You know, people write in all the time about threesomes. It's always the guy that wants the threesome, and he always wants to be with two girls! Tell him that you'll be happy to p... (read in full...)
I wake up to having tense feelings in the chest, and miserable thoughts. What IS this??
Q. Hi. Health related question. Some time ago, I used to wake up in the morning, be very tense in the chest area and feel miserable. Recently, this has returned. What is it? Could it be stress related? It seems that lately when I try to sleep,...
A. 23 January 2008: Hi Andy!
Ouch. I remember having these - it's an anxiety attack or panic attack. Don't worry, it's not a heart attack, you are much too young for that, even with family history. You can check it out with your Doctor if it makes you feel any bett... (read in full...)
I'm 25 and I have gone completely off sex! What's wrong?
Q. Hi guys, I'm a 25 year old women and for the last 6 months have really gone off sex. I used to be incredibly sexually active and now i am the complete opposite - I don't even have any sexual thoughts anymore. I have been with my partner for 2 1/...
A. 23 January 2008: It will surprise you how many times you will go through this in your lifetime. Libidos to tend to "wax and wain", much like the phases of the moon, and the interest that you have in sex one YEAR may not be the same the next, regardless of how long ... (read in full...)
Is he dating these other women (some are prostitutes) or... is he just helping them financially, like he claims?
Q. I was dating for 1month a man who is almost double my age. I really loved him and i think he does too. But the problem is a lot of women calls him and he try to answer them by saying he is with his GF. and i told him to ask them all not to call... i ...
A. 23 January 2008: No one every gives money away to a total stranger unless they have received something in return. Was her name also Charity? I suspect that he has told you a few little fibs in order to cover his tracks... ... (read in full...)
Mom's new husband seems to be pushing us all away from her!
Q. Hi everyone...I am having a problem with my mom's new husband. They first met about 6 months ago on the internet and decided to get married pretty much a month after meeting which was the first thing that bothered me since my mother has already been ...
A. 23 January 2008: If your name is on the lease, I wouldn't back down. You have every right to be there, and you MAY be held responsible for the rent even if you start living somewhere else. Even if she is being wimpy, I would be inclined to stick around to see if ... (read in full...)
I need help in seeing the reality of my own pain! What the most painful thing that has happened in your lives?
Q. What are the most painful things happened to you,,in your lifetime so far? I'm curious, what are the most hurtful things, what happened t others, and how they deal with it, as I feel, my life is full of pain, and everybody else seem to have smooth ...
A. 23 January 2008: I buried my Dad on my 30th Wedding Anniversary 4 months ago. My Brother is out of remission and had a brain tumor removed two weeks before Christmas. He left his wife and kids 4 days before Christmas for his girlfriend. The 10,000 that we paid ... (read in full...)
Is it legal for me to leave home?
Q. Im wondering because my best friends mum and dad are planning to move to california and they have invited me to go with them. Is it legal for me to leave my house is my mum agrees to it? Please tell me anything you know on it thanks...
A. 23 January 2008: One more thing, be prepared, as a guest at your age, to pitch in and help by keeping your room clean, doing your own laundry and helping out around the house...... (read in full...)
Is it legal for me to leave home?
Q. Im wondering because my best friends mum and dad are planning to move to california and they have invited me to go with them. Is it legal for me to leave my house is my mum agrees to it? Please tell me anything you know on it thanks...
A. 23 January 2008: Don't forget the medical insurance. Hope that everything works out for you. Your certainly old enough to consider doing this, but like I said, it broke my heart to let a child go at this age. So don't be too surprised if your Mom says No, and ... (read in full...)
Is it legal for me to leave home?
Q. Im wondering because my best friends mum and dad are planning to move to california and they have invited me to go with them. Is it legal for me to leave my house is my mum agrees to it? Please tell me anything you know on it thanks...
A. 22 January 2008: How old are you Dear?... (read in full...)
Is it legal for me to leave home?
Q. Im wondering because my best friends mum and dad are planning to move to california and they have invited me to go with them. Is it legal for me to leave my house is my mum agrees to it? Please tell me anything you know on it thanks...
A. 22 January 2008: Are you sure that they didn't just ask you to come and visit Dear?
Living with them in the US would be a huge proposition. The US doesn't have socialized medical care, so it would cost them quite a bit of money to take care of you, in the form... (read in full...)
Pregnancy concern!
Q. hy i had sex on the 10th and 11th and ovulated on the 13th and i wanted to know seen as im 20. how likley it would be if i would be pregnant. thanks 4 reading and thanks 4 helping....
A. 22 January 2008: That's the optimum time to get pregnant. You could try to take an over-the-counter test now to find out, some of them are sensitive enough to pick it up this soon. Good Luck.... (read in full...)
Ladies problem's, Need some advice Girls?
Q. Hi Can someone help me please I have started getting hair growth on my chin area and marks that are going all black with the hair growing through them I use tweezers to get the hairs out but I feel I am doing this every day now. Any suggestions what...
A. 22 January 2008: It could be a bit of peri-menopause, that is a symptom, but you seem a bit too young for that just yet. If I were you, I would go and get some blood work done and have them check your hormone levels and your thyroid levels. I have to tell you ... (read in full...)
Coughing up Blood! I am scared and not sure what to do?
Q. Hi, i know this is nothing to do with relationships but im worried about some health issues i have at the moment. Firstly i have spells where i keep coughing but its not a consistant cough its just now and again, the other day i started coughing and ...
A. 22 January 2008: Coughing up blood is a serious symptom. Go to the emergency room. ... (read in full...)
Should I worry about not being able to orgasm during sex?
Q. I'm getting quite worried, because I just can't orgasm during sex. I can when he licks me out, or rubs my clitoris, but during actual intercourse it doesn't really turn me on to a point where I can orgasm... Is there a problem? I know there's ...
A. 22 January 2008: The statistics are that 75% of women can only come with extra stimulation directly to the clitoris. So, you are perfectly normal. Most women need finger stimulation on the clitoris or oral sex in order to come. So you are quite normal, like the ... (read in full...)
I want children, but my partner doesn't. He feels he is to old?
Q. Ok, so I been with my boyfriend for about 4 years and we have had are share of problems but we are very deep in love. He is 16 years older than me and he doesnt want anymore kids. He has three kids of his own. I want kids so bad and I wont give that ...
A. 21 January 2008: If the most he can he can be is 41, that's not TOO old to have kids. He would be about 60 when they were in University, so you will probably have to have a career too and plan for picking up some of the future financial responsibilities of having ... (read in full...)
How do I cope with a workaholic boyfriend?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for three years, and what first attracted me to him was the fact he is a determined person.However, I have came to realize that his determination is more like money hungery. He works 7 days a week. It seems like ...
A. 21 January 2008: I remember hearing that the qualities that attract you in the first place are the same qualities that wind up driving you nuts once you get married. My husband was ambitious; now he's a workaholic, he was the-strong-but-silent-type; now he's ... (read in full...)
Is my friend being minipulated, or do I have this wrong?
Q. Hi all, I have a question that I would like some veiws on. Yesterday afternoon, I met a friend and her husband in the pub and was invited to go back to dinner. This couple are our close friends,(he was left by his wife for another man) and we ofte...
A. 21 January 2008: I think that Adam has a few hang-ups about his wife leaving him for another man. He now has a younger woman and wants to show her off, probably for the ego boost. It's tacky when a man pimps out his woman to make himself look good, even MORE so ... (read in full...)
Baby's names! who gets the last word?
Q. A while ago, I wrote in about wanting to be preggie all the time, even though a baby is still out of the question for some particular reasons which I will not discuss at this time because, well, they're irrelevant to the question, and the question ...
A. 21 January 2008: I wouldn't worry about that right now. When the time comes, you'll reach a compromise!
Try to pick a name that goes ethnically with your last name. If your last name is short, use a first name with more than one syllable. If the last name is l... (read in full...)
My new boyfriend has a very shady past, should I let it put me off?
Q. I've been dating this guy for a few weeks, and just wondered what people thought in regards to his past. I really like him, and he treats me like a princess, a total gentleman, but he has such a shady past and I guess I worry that it might repeat -...
A. 21 January 2008: People who are in "recovery", drying-out or in rehab are all told to put-off trying new relationships for *one whole year*. That's because they have to put themselves first in order to conquer their addictions. Then, they are supposed to try to ... (read in full...)
Any advice what to do about the brother who always undermines me??
Q. My only brother and I have never been close. Since our father's death 4 years ago there has been an emotional struggle for mother's attention. My brother has done everything in his power to devalue me in Mother's eyes, to the point where she seem...
A. 21 January 2008: Hi,
It's been my experience that when someone is vying for a larger piece of the estate pie, they are usually in debt or have done some other thing to have already lightened up the estate, either by selling off bits and pieces of the company or leve... (read in full...)
I'm lying to my whole family
Q. At the moment I'm lying to my whole family. My 14y/o sister is dating an 18y/o who I know well as have been mates for a while. The issue is the rest of my family completely disagrees with it as through past experiences within the family we are...
A. 20 January 2008: And what happens when the truth comes out or the proverbial hits the fan? How will you feel if your sister becomes pregnant? You know that there is a massive difference sexually between a 14 year old and an 18 year old, especially in their ... (read in full...)
Advice on sex in hot tub please!
Q. Hiya abit of an awkward question but me and my wife are going to my sisters soon and she has a hottub thats normally outdorrs but it can be brought indoors which is what they have done in the winter. They have onverted one of the garages into a room ...
A. 20 January 2008: Don't bring in any sex toys that require an electrical cord? LOL! Sorry, couldn't resist...... (read in full...)
What do you get for a new boyfriend for Valentines Day?
Q. I've been dating this guy a couple of weeks. We've known each other 6 months or so, so I do know his likes and dislikes well-ish. (He's into cars, BMW's, enjoys drinking and going out, quite into his appearance - meaning he likes to look good/do ...
A. 20 January 2008: If he is funny and likes to laugh, how about tickets to a local comedy club and dinner? That way you both get to enjoy the present!... (read in full...)
What to wear for VERY posh dinner??
Q. My boyfriend is taking me to a very expensive hotel in a couple of weeks. I know it's costing in excess of £200 a night, so my reason for panic is what do I wear? We're eating at the restaurant there, and I don't really have any knowledge of what ...
A. 20 January 2008: You can never go wrong with a simple black dress, to the knee, wrap-around, surplice or V-neck. Not a spaghetti-strap or strapless, that's more for a cocktail party. Less is more. Simple jewelry. Make sure when you pick out the outfit - that YOU ... (read in full...)
Do vasectomies work 100 percent?
Q. Just a quick question, if a man has had a vasectomy does that mean theres NO CHANCE of getting someone pregnant?...
A. 20 January 2008: I may be making a huge leap here, but if some guy is stringing you a line telling you that he doesn't need to wear a condom because he's had a vasectomy, it's a lie. It's the same kind of line as a married guy saying that his wife doesn't ... (read in full...)
Why does my ex wear my old clothes?
Q. Hello Out there, just a quick question. My ex left me for someone else 7 months ago and I am over her but during the 7 months I noticed she's been wearing my tops that I no longer wanted. I bumped into her at a bar and she wore my vest. I bumped ...
A. 20 January 2008: i have to say that I don't get it either. I wear my husband's t-shirt when he is traveling because I miss him. And most ex's want to throw away all of their boyfriends clothing, not wear it. Maybe she just thinks that the t-shirt is cool. The ... (read in full...)
Is having a heart-shaped ass a good thing?
Q. he said I have a nice heart shaped a** I asked him what this meant and he said its hard to explain, but its a good thing. can anyone tell me what this means?...
A. 20 January 2008: Turn the shape of the heart upside down!... (read in full...)
What does a smear test involve?
Q. Hello ladies, im due to go for a smear test soon and im really scared as ive never had one before. What exactly happens? Is it painful? Im very shy anyway and the thought of having this done makes me nervous. Any general info and advice would be ...
A. 20 January 2008: If you have a male doctor, a female nurse should accompany him during the exam. The metal clamp, the speculum, should be run under warm water so that it doesn't give you a startle! It just opens your vagina so the doctor can see your cervix, ... (read in full...)
Shall I take revenge on my ex?
Q. Dear Helpers, I just found out my ex had been cheating on me when were together and not only that he had been kissing one of my friends and some of his own. I am so angry I want to take revenge but I know it's wrong to take revenge but for my own ...
A. 20 January 2008: I think that is called fraud or theft... Don't let some else's poor behavior drag you down to their level, like all the other aunties and uncles have said. Walk away with you head held high and don't bother looking back, he isn't worth it. The ... (read in full...)
My legs cramp when an orgasm builds? Why?
Q. Thanks to some advice I'd been given from one of the Uncles on this site, I've finally started to orgasm and its wonderful! But, this that I'm about to mention has always happened and seems to still happen... Whenever I felt I might orgasm before, I ...
A. 20 January 2008: Yoga. Yoga and more yoga. It is passive stretching. It will help with your flexibility and help to loosen up those muscles. Cheers! ... (read in full...)
What should I get my good friend...for her birthday?
Q. What should i get my friend for her birthday? We are not in a relationship,but i do have feelings for her. She got me something for my birthday so i feel that i need to get her something. Unfortunately i have no idea what to get her. I asked advice ...
A. 19 January 2008: I agree with the other readers, jewelry is too personal. You could hedge your bet and get her the CD and bring along a single red rose with it... If she smiles at the rose, it might just be the opening to something more than just friendship.... (read in full...)
I wake up to having tense feelings in the chest, and miserable thoughts. What IS this??
Q. Hi. Health related question. Some time ago, I used to wake up in the morning, be very tense in the chest area and feel miserable. Recently, this has returned. What is it? Could it be stress related? It seems that lately when I try to sleep,...
A. 6 January 2008: I am so sorry about your heartache. I'm pretty sure that at your age, it's a bunch of heartache and perhaps a little bit of depression. If you wake up and your first thought is of her and that's when it starts, well, that's your answer. It's ... (read in full...)
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