A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear Helpers, I just found out my ex had been cheating on me when were together and not only that he had been kissing one of my friends and some of his own. I am so angry I want to take revenge but I know it's wrong to take revenge but for my own sanity I need to do something as it is affecting me with my work, my family and friends. Everyday I imagine hitting him but I will not as I refuse to see him. Today I found his credit card details in his notebook and thought there is a god! I been thinking about making generous donations to charities and never to let him know it was me. What do you all think about this idea?
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kissing, my ex, revenge Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2008): i think you should . he needs to donate to womens shelters. thats where that donation should go to.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2008): Well, I was browsing for revenge ideas when I say this! I had a guy pull some really tragic stuff on me, and my friends. (He is a hateful gay guy who wears Tank Tops and cut off shorts! 58 with white hair, spiked). I would not suggest the whole epoxy lube thing or the credit card thing. I'm taking a better route.
1. Sign him up for the most horrid and nasty kind of junk mail. (sex change, viagra, penal implants, etc.) The worse the better.
2. Order some kind of Super sick porn mags, with his name as the receiver, then send to Moms House, or next door, or the office!) :-] Moowahhahhahhhaaaahhaahaha!
or
3. Set up tons of personal ads with his info. She will not stay long, plus there is that whole ongoing phone call thing)
and
last but not least
If he is a home owner, Bush and Brush killer (that you mix yourself) and lawns, shrubs, or trees. Everyone in that hood may suffer, but so did you!
Enjoy!!
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A
female
reader, shadowcat  +, writes (21 January 2008):
 This is not the way to get revenge. Fraud can get you in trouble you never dreamed of-technically what you are doing is identity theft (I don't know what the penalty for this is in New Zealand, but where I am it is fairly steep: 10 years in prison and a huge fine.) A better outlet for your anger is renting the film Meet Joe Black: wait for the part where Brad Pitt gets hit by a car and just imagine it is Mr. Wandering Eye's head atop that body. Hit rewind repeatedly, and you'll feel better. (For best results, watch with plenty of chocolate ice cream and also rent the film First Wives Club as a backup.) If you really want to do him in, (and this is ONLY if nothing else works or matters get worse) get some of that K-Y jelly lubricant and replace it with crazy glue or epoxy (non toxic.) if the two of them use it they will be stuck together and most likely will have to be surgically separated at a hospital....and EVERYONE will have a good laugh at them. (the doctors, the nurses, the neighbors, the medics, anyone in your circle of friends, and most especially you.) She shoplifted your man, then she can pay the price!
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A
female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (21 January 2008):
 No don't commit fraud. You could end up in worse shape. If you really want to get even, sleep with his best friend and make sure he knows about it. Then perhaps you can let it go, and move on. Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2008): Another thought - you could use his card to buy your 'friend' a nice piece of jewellery, nicely gift wrapped and delivered with a romantic card from him.
This is not good advice.
Do with it what you will!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2008): This must be so tempting! I know exactly how you feel. One of my exes cleared out a joint account we had and I was so angry I could have petrol-bombed the house. I was all set to do it too, but I was persuaded that this was a silly thing to even think about. Fortunately sanity prevailed and so far I've never been to jail.
However, she's still bitter and twisted and I'm as happy as the proverbial pig in shit. She's permanently miserable and isn't happy unless everyone else is too. I reckon I came out of it better than she did. She makes enemies, whereas I make friends.
You know what you're thinking is silly too otherwise you wouldn't be asking if it's a good thing to do. Give it time and you'll be the one who's smiling and he'll be the miserable one.
If you must go ahead with your scheme, could I suggest that you buy him an expensive present with his card. That way you won't be seen to have profited from his misfortune and who's to prove he didn't order it himself?
Very tempting. Very.
Phil
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A
female
reader, cedric c +, writes (20 January 2008):
revenge is best served cold
never ever acknowledge his existance again
it will do his head right in
and that so called 'friend' of yours too
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 January 2008): NO! Please do not lower yourself to go down this path, you will live to regret it and as others have said, this is infact fraud, and you could go to jail for it. So give him back the cards and move on with your head held high. You are better than that. He did these things to you, so they are in the past and you have learnt from this experience. Revenge does no one any good, move on.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (20 January 2008):
 I think that is called fraud or theft... Don't let some else's poor behavior drag you down to their level, like all the other aunties and uncles have said. Walk away with you head held high and don't bother looking back, he isn't worth it. The best revenge is living well. Good luck Dear.
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (20 January 2008):
 Just think to yourself that you had a lucky escape from this loser. Personally i would not bother taking revenge, just erase everything to do with him from your life and move on. Ok so he was a two timer and a total loser, but the one who has lost at the end of the day is him because he no longer has you. Put it all down to experience, a learning curve and move on. Sooner or later you will find a good guy who treats you with the love and respect that you so rightly deserve, and probably when you least expect it.
Good luck x
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (20 January 2008):
 You know it is wrong to take revenge and yet you want to do something which is not right.
You should forgive him and move on. The anger in you burns you more than your enemy. You will start a vicious cycle for what you sow , so shall you reap.He may respond against you and where will it end?
You should let go of your bitterness and revenge .
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A
female
reader, happytochat +, writes (20 January 2008):
Im sorry what has happened to you, you must feel really bad. Its understanding that you are full of anger and what to hurt your ex bf back, because he hurt you. Ive been through that too. However, revenge is never as good as what it seems during the planing stage. All it will do is give you a quick fix really...and once that fix is quickly over, you will go back to feeling bad about what has happened with your ex bf. It doesnt really help. Don't stoop to his level. If you try to get revenge, not only will you probably feel bad about it after, in a years time you will look back on this and probably be ashamed of how you dealt. I think you should walk away with your head held high. Prove to yourself, that you have a lot of strength, and are better then him, because i'm sure you are.
Find other ways to release the anger you have towards him for what he did. Exercise can help, even if you arent really into sports or anything. By being physically active, it can help decrease stress levels. I always feel SO much better after a long run. You could try writing a letter to him, saying whatever you want, telling him all of what you think of him and so on...but just dont send it. Perhaps being able to even talk to him and tell him how you feel could help to.
Hope this has helped :)
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