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... Send *evastated2008 a private message | | | *evastated2008's profile:I am not qualified to help anyone, but God is. I can give my opinion, advice, or share my experience but its up to the receipient to decide what is useful. My experience is wide and varied... and overall I am mostly at peace (with occassional lapses) and I owe that to God and what He provides me.
I am a Christian and believe in a literal translation of the Bible as the inspired word of God. This site has many variations of beliefs so if you don't like my answer I am sure if you look you'll find the answer you want to hear.
If I tell you I am praying or will pray for you, be assured that I do. |
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She might have to sleep with him one more time to get the car in HER name!!!
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for a month now and I love her a lot. When we met she told me she had a "provider" like a suger daddy. She hasn't seen him since we have been together but he just bought her a car right before we met and she ...
A. 25 March 2010: Uhhh...NO!! You should not be okay with this...its wrong on a number of levels.
1. Where are her morals?
2. Where are yours that you would consider pimping her out for a car?
She can call it quits regardless of whether the car is in he... (read in full...)
Sleeping with a broken heart...
Q. Hello, Here's my situation: i found out through myspace that my boyfriend of 3 years has been cheating with an ex girlfriend for the past year. when confronted, he denied it so i confronted her and found out it was true. when he found out i talk...
A. 25 March 2010: There may be a time and a place for getting back together, but its not now.
He is no where near committed to you, he is not taking responsibility and if you accept the situation you make yourself look weak and undesirable and set yourself up for r... (read in full...)
The baby girl I had adopted is in my class!!! (I'm teaching her!)
Q. I'm an 8th grade teacher and when i was younger I had a baby girl and put her up for adoption because i was only 15 at the time i had her. Now I recently recieved an email from the parents of a child informing me that my daughter was in my class. ...
A. 25 March 2010: I definitely think you should NOT tell her, its not your place. You aren't her mother. She has a mother.
I think you should get together with the adoptive parents and discuss this. This sounds like a terrible situation for everyone.
It has ... (read in full...)
How close is too close for married friends?
Q. How close are you to your best friend's husband? My best friend is more like family than a friend. I am very good friends with her husband as well. NOTHING sexual or anything like that, but we do talk, text and hang out. I was just wondering how ...
A. 22 March 2010: I think the fact that you ask indicates that there is some question or concern about over stepping boundaries.
You have an obligation to your friend to maintain total integrity and loyalty. Anytime there are male/female friendships there are risk... (read in full...)
She said my penis was "kinda thin". What is normal and what can I do?
Q. I was with this girl and she told me that my penis' erect length (4.7 inches) was just fine, but that it was "kinda thin"... My penis is about 4 inches in girth and 1.5 inches wide when fully erect. I read somewhere the average was 6 inches in ...
A. 21 March 2010: You can make it longer by losing weight... 10 pounds is supposed to add 1 inch if you are overweight. I don't know about girth but the additional blood flow from a healthier lifestyle might do the trick... and a healthier lifestyle includes a ... (read in full...)
My work colleague has left his wife for me. Should I get involved?
Q. I have been working at my work place for 11 months. It became obvious 6 months ago that one of my married work colleagues had developed feelings for me. He constantly hung around my office area during his lunch. I steadfastly ignored him. Even some ...
A. 16 February 2010: You are right this situation definitely struck a nerve with me.
I thought you were serious in your request for advice and was unaware that you considered this an entertaining debate.
As far as debates go... I believe the points are not i... (read in full...)
The physical component of my marriage is non-existent.
Q. The physical component of my marriage is non-existent. My wife is a child abuse survivor. She is very kind and sweet and a great mother but has no respect for men. Years ago, I explained to her that her reactions to my physical ovetures caused me to ...
A. 15 February 2010: I am glad to hear that you are a praying man.
God gave you the desires that you are struggling with... he also gave you the responsibility as the head of the house. As you said, you are considering just shutting up and accepting things as they ... (read in full...)
My work colleague has left his wife for me. Should I get involved?
Q. I have been working at my work place for 11 months. It became obvious 6 months ago that one of my married work colleagues had developed feelings for me. He constantly hung around my office area during his lunch. I steadfastly ignored him. Even some ...
A. 15 February 2010: I am speaking for the wife and the children because they are the ones not represented. I am not his wife, but I was a wife devastated by a husband who claimed similar things... "married too young" "you always criticized"
"stayed for the chil... (read in full...)
My work colleague has left his wife for me. Should I get involved?
Q. I have been working at my work place for 11 months. It became obvious 6 months ago that one of my married work colleagues had developed feelings for me. He constantly hung around my office area during his lunch. I steadfastly ignored him. Even some ...
A. 13 February 2010: By following your comments to the other posts to me it looks like you have already decided to see where this relationship is going. You appear to be drawn to the flattery of someone being interested in you and the drama of the situation. (I don't ... (read in full...)
Will she cheat on me if she cheated on her ex partner!
Q. ok guys i need your help! ive been with my girlfriend for about 7 months now, and it seems that every month that gose past i keep finding things out about her past that i dont like and sits on my head! everytime i try to talk to her about it she ...
A. 3 February 2010: From everything you describe, it sounds like she has a history with YOU of deceitful/misleading behavior. Whether you have brought this on or not it obviously bothers you... and personally I think it would me too. Intelligent people look at a ... (read in full...)
The physical component of my marriage is non-existent.
Q. The physical component of my marriage is non-existent. My wife is a child abuse survivor. She is very kind and sweet and a great mother but has no respect for men. Years ago, I explained to her that her reactions to my physical ovetures caused me to ...
A. 3 February 2010: Show her your post here. Your concerns are very legitimate. You definitely should be concerned that you might stray under the right circumstances. You are in a very vulnerable position.
As much as it likely feels like she does not love you, don... (read in full...)
I need christian advice about living together.
Q. I need the christian advice. I have been dating "Ted" for 6 months now and he is a wonderful man. He is so important and special to me. Due to the economy a couple of months ago, his business failed and he needed to find somewhere to live. Due to ...
A. 2 February 2010: Christian advice- no sex, no living together outside of marriage. Quit using finances and convenience as the excuse- Christians trust God to provide. It isn't your responsibility to "sin" and promote "sin" in order to "save" him.
You can only... (read in full...)
Help! My husband had an emotional affair and I can't let go of it
Q. Help, I feel I'm going out of my head. My husband had an emotional affair and I can't let go of it. At first he was very sympathetic and supportive trying to help me overcome it. Now it has all blown up and affected his work due to my actions t...
A. 2 February 2010: Forget about him right now and take care of you. You were damaged by his actions and that is a fact. That doesn't make it acceptable for you to do anything and everything and blame it on him because he caused it. (I certainly understand the ... (read in full...)
Why am I still so shaken up over this?
Q. hii, im 16 and my new boyfriend, steve, is 19. we`ve been together for 2 months. i did not lose my virginity to him but we had sex for the first time together last night. he is the second guy i have had sex with. so let me give you a little info ...
A. 2 February 2010: Tia, rape isn't something you just get over. You need rape counseling. The more you try to deny and suppress your pain the more power you give it.
As hard and scary as it seems, it is going to have to be dealt with... that means talking and thin... (read in full...)
I cut off contact and did the right thing, so what now?
Q. Well, I did it. I thought of my girlfriend of ten years and her feelings first, like everyone always says, and I cut off contact with my best friend (who is a woman) who I was getting too close to. She understood, of course, because she's awesome. ...
A. 28 December 2009: Your "best friend" was an affair partner... an emotional affair partner but an affair none the less. Yes you were right to give up that relationship if you wanted to protect your gf. Give it time and do not maintain ANY ties with the "friend" and ... (read in full...)
Our affair was exposed and my reputation is at stake!
Q. I had an affair with a married man. About a year ago we started hanging out and a kiss led to touching, and touching led to sex. We had sex 3 different times and hung out from time to time after that. I have not seen him in about 9 months and then ...
A. 28 December 2009: Write her and apologize. Tell her what you told us... that you feel horrible and guilty and wish you could take it back.
But don't ask her to protect your reputation, you took that risk when you slept with her husband. Just be sincere and let ... (read in full...)
How does a woman know when she's had an orgasm?
Q. How does a female know she has had an orgasm? i know that sounds stupid. but my boyfriend is always telling me that i should just let go and orgasm already or are you going to orgasm soon and i dont really know what it is like i dont know how i ...
A. 23 November 2009: It sounds like you have not reached orgasm because the feeling is very distinctive and unlike anything else.
When you become aroused and close to orgasm your pelvic structures become engorged with blood and this causes significant pressure... (read in full...)
I have a boyfriend but I'm developing an attraction for a guy at work. What do I do?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and I love him to pieces. Recently, I met this other guy at my job and we've been talking a lot. I'm starting to have strong feelings for him. Its the best/horrible feeling in the world. No way would I ever ...
A. 23 November 2009: You may not be able to help the attraction you are feeling but you can take charge of your actions. You say that no way would you cheat on your boyfriend... well yes you would cheat if you allow this situation to continue.
If you value yourself... (read in full...)
Should I tell my boyfriend about my ex raping me?
Q. Should I tell my bf, that my ex bf raped me during my relationship with my ex? I dont know if I should tell him or not. I am afraid of how he will react. At the same time, I also believe that because we are partners we should tell each other ...
A. 11 November 2009: Yes, I think he has a right to honesty, by not telling him you are unintentionally allowing him to draw false conclusions about why you are waiting. You are creating a false image of yourself. There is nothing wrong with you that you need to do ... (read in full...)
What would the symptoms be of pregnancy 2-3 weeks into it?
Q. what would the symptoms be of pregnancy 2-3 weeks into it? any at all? its about 4 days before im supposed to get my period and my nipples are sore, pains in my sides and lower abdomen and insideeee my vagina and im crying all the time sometimes ...
A. 11 November 2009: Those could be symptoms of pregnancy or they could be pms and anxiety. You need to take a pregnancy test if you don't get your period in the next week.... (read in full...)
What would the symptoms be of pregnancy 2-3 weeks into it?
Q. what would the symptoms be of pregnancy 2-3 weeks into it? any at all? its about 4 days before im supposed to get my period and my nipples are sore, pains in my sides and lower abdomen and insideeee my vagina and im crying all the time sometimes ...
A. 11 November 2009: Those could be symptoms of pregnancy or they could be pms and anxiety. You need to take a pregnancy test if you don't get your period in the next week.... (read in full...)
Why won't my wife go down on me?
Q. Why is it my wife wont go down on me yet she has no problem with me pleasing her orally? Before marriage i never had to ask. But now i only gotten head 3 times this decade yet i do her 3 to 4 times a month. Every time i even make a suggesti...
A. 11 November 2009: Accountable is right I wasn't trying to say you were a taker. We all feel like we give more than our share in some way. And when we are giving what WE want instead of what the other person wants/needs... we do end up feeling slighted.
You m... (read in full...)
Why won't my wife go down on me?
Q. Why is it my wife wont go down on me yet she has no problem with me pleasing her orally? Before marriage i never had to ask. But now i only gotten head 3 times this decade yet i do her 3 to 4 times a month. Every time i even make a suggesti...
A. 10 November 2009: Since we are speculating here... how many times in the last ten years have you shared a true heart to heart emotional connection with her?...3 times maybe?
You say before marriage you never had to ask for her to go down on you, but now she does... (read in full...)
I cheated so why isn't my wife angry?
Q. I had an affair. She ended it. I was no longer in love with my wife. The situation wasn't fair to either of us, so I told her everything and that I was ready to leave (she'd had her suspicions). She broke down and couldn't really function, so I ...
A. 10 November 2009: What you did was a terrible betrayal to your wife. You made a very horrible cruel decision and I think somewhere deep down you know it. Sometimes we shut off our emotions in self-defense.
There is something about infidelity that tends to set o... (read in full...)
I'm having a strong desire to run before I am hurt. What should I do?
Q. Feeling so uneasy with this. He didn't say he loves me back, and I'm afraid of how this is affecting me now. Yes, it's important that he treats me well, and he does. He says he doesn't want to jinx anything. Meanwhile, I'm having a strong desire ...
A. 10 November 2009: That's GREAT! So nice to hear happy endings.... or I mean happy beginnings!
... (read in full...)
I'm having a strong desire to run before I am hurt. What should I do?
Q. Feeling so uneasy with this. He didn't say he loves me back, and I'm afraid of how this is affecting me now. Yes, it's important that he treats me well, and he does. He says he doesn't want to jinx anything. Meanwhile, I'm having a strong desire ...
A. 9 November 2009: I think CaringGuy is right... actions for men are what counts.
I think before you run, you should tell him what you said here. Don't expect any words of love or anything at all, but just say it straight up... "I am having a strong desire to run, ... (read in full...)
Husband seems close to his female colleague. Should I speak up?
Q. My husband is friends with a female coworker and lately it has been making me feel uneasy. My husband and his female coworker started working in the same building about 8 months ago. Prior to that they worked for the same company, but in cities t...
A. 9 November 2009: I think you are right to be uncomfortable. There are many signs of either an existing affair or one that could catch fire easily.
If you decide to speak up, don't do it impulsively and make any accusations or come across as a jealous, insecure... (read in full...)
Confused...is he interested?
Q. dear cupid, i am really confused about this guy that i think im really starting to like!! it has been a while since i met someone that im slightly interested in since my last break up. and finally im starting to like someone but i am really confused...
A. 9 November 2009: You said he just came out of a long distance relationship, he may be just uncertain and a little scared of jumping into another relationship. Or he may still have feelings invested in his prior partner.If there was any betrayal in either of your ... (read in full...)
What can I do to help her get over this?
Q. I've been dating my girlfriend, "Nicole", for almost a year now. I have had one previous girlfriend, "Molly", who I dated a few years before Nicole. I'm Nicole's first real boyfriend and she is very turned off by the fact that Molly and I had an ...
A. 6 November 2009: Maybe you should take her at her word. She says she can never get over the fact that you have been intimate with another girl. You can't undo that and if she truly feels that way she shouldn't be expected to change either.
She hasn't been int... (read in full...)
Could my ex be father of my baby?
Q. ok i had sex with my ex boyfriend aug 19- and i got my period on aug 20th- and on aug 27th i had sex with my new partner i found out i was pregnant can this baby be my ex boyfriends??...
A. 5 November 2009: It is possible but unlikely. Did you have a normal period? Normal length, normal heaviness, everything about period the same as usual? Was your period at the expected time of the month? If everything was normal and typical for you... then you ... (read in full...)
Did I do the right thing by staying with my husband?
Q. I'm very confused, and feel like my brain is not functioning properly, I make a decision know it's the right one, then change my mind. I really want your advice. Should I stay with my husband. I want to stay and be happy together, but do...
A. 30 October 2009: I read your post the first day before anyone answered. I couldn't respond then because it stirred up too many emotions in me. I think you should give yourself a big break from this... it sounds like you are emotionally and probably physica... (read in full...)
Is it ok that I am 21 and she is 15?
Q. OK... If i am 21 can i go out with this girl that is 15 and she loves me and i love her. her parents like me and trust me, they don't mind if i go out with there daughter. I am a Cristian and i wear a purity ring and i am faithful to my promise with ...
A. 29 October 2009: No as a Christian it is better to look out for her best interests first. She needs time to grow and mature. And the best way to protect your vows of purity is to avoid temptation to begin with... that ring is only a symbol of your intent. It... (read in full...)
What would girls recommend that a guy with a small penis do in bed?
Q. What kind of things could a guy with a small penis do to give a girl a good time in bed? Mine only measures about 3 and 1/2 inches when erect, 4 inches if I push the fat in a little (I'm a bit on the heavy side), but clearly I'm not going to be ...
A. 27 October 2009: Losing weight will give you length... I think it only takes a ten pound weight loss to gain an inch. Not to mention the endurance and attractibility you will gain from a healthier body... Good luck.... (read in full...)
Should I clear the air with him?
Q. I'm very confused why I can't stop thinking about him. We are both married with children. My spouse could not be more perfect for me. We are both so alike in so many ways. The "spark" left our relationship once our first child was born. We go months ...
A. 27 October 2009: Absolutely do not clear the air with this coworker! Don't plant those kind of temptations and enticements into his head. Yes, he may very well be attracted to you but that doesn't mean he doesn't want his marriage, his wife and his family. You ... (read in full...)
How do I sweep him off his feet?
Q. the guy i love has loved a girl for 15 years,and he told me that he wants to forget her,and that he thinks that im the one who could make him do that..can anyone please tell me how?please can you help me think of something?i wanna sweep him off his ...
A. 27 October 2009: Oh please don't even try... that is a line a mile long. Please don't fall for it.
Aside from the obvious age issues and the likelihood that he's married or barely out of a marriage that defies normal male/female dynamics. It is typicall... (read in full...)
I have cheated on my husband resulting in 3 abortions and now he wants a baby!
Q. its been 10 weeks since my abortion im trying for a baby but it keeps coming negative.iv had 3 abortions. Due to careless behind my hubbys back.but now my hubbys really desperate for a baby.please help....
A. 27 October 2009: I think you are asking for abuse by making that post. Why would you post like that? You provided nothing that would make people feel sympathy and compassion for you... instead you stated your plea in a way that will make most of us hope that no ... (read in full...)
What is behind his accusations?
Q. My boyfriend has accused me of looking at other men in a sexual way and of cheating on him, for a little more than one year. I have officially gone insane and the other day I freaked out on him and shouted that I finally understand why h...
A. 27 October 2009: Right now it doesn't matter what his words/accusations mean. His actions are speaking loudest... yes it sounds like he is in pain... depressed ect, but he is being abusive to you and you are allowing it (unintentionally).
You need to speak wi... (read in full...)
Should I forgive her and trust again?
Q. Hi everyone, please any advice at all would be much appriciated!!, sorry this might be abit drawn out but I need serious help with my love life. I met a girl when I was 12, it was love a first sight for both of us and immediatley we hit it off, for...
A. 26 October 2009: The person you love is not the one you are dealing with right now. You love someone that does not exist and may have never existed. She has some very serious issues that are her responsibility to deal with... I know you love her and this hurts y... (read in full...)
I need help with ending a relationship!
Q. I will be ending an eleven-year relationship. She knows I am considering it, but she is very hopeful I will choose to stay. I care about her and she still feels very strongly for me. When the time comes, is it wrong for me to be there to comfort ...
A. 6 October 2009: I hear your words and I think that much of what you say is what my husband must have felt when he left... especially the frustration even anger ... that the change would happen now... now when you feel you've made a decision... why now?!!! and not ... (read in full...)
I'm falling in love with someone who isn't my wife!
Q. I am so confused. I am married and our sex life doesn't exist, but there is someone else that I want to be with. I am 40 she is 18 and we are very flirty with each other. I don't know if its the lack of sex at home or what but I am finding myself ...
A. 6 October 2009: You have a very real need for sexual fulfillment and meaningful sex. You want fun and excitement ... and to feel youthful again. The eighteen year old might give you that ...MIGHT... but it will be short-term. To have an affair is one of th... (read in full...)
I need help with ending a relationship!
Q. I will be ending an eleven-year relationship. She knows I am considering it, but she is very hopeful I will choose to stay. I care about her and she still feels very strongly for me. When the time comes, is it wrong for me to be there to comfort ...
A. 3 October 2009: Being there and a soft shoulder and all sounds great, but it will also be sending her mixed signals. You are also likely to feel a lot more than you expect to once you actually break it off with her. Goodbye sex will be a big temptation and for a ... (read in full...)
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