Living a secret life is hurting me
Q. I am 17 years old and im gay. No one knows about this, only myself. Some people suspects that im gay, my friends even my girlfriend. I dont know wat to do or what to say cause it will be a disgrace to my family and to my community. It hard to accept ...
A. 14 October 2009: ive been there and experienced that. you dont have to immediately declare to everyone that you're gay. maybe sharing my experience may help u. before, i was very secluded also with my being gay. had sexual attraction to men and 0 attraction to wo... (read in full...)
I'm a teenage guy and I have no idea if I'm gay or straight.
Q. Im a young guy, and i have always had sexual urges towards men.I also have sexual urges towards women but not as strong. However I have been completely and utterly in love with women, but my sexual desires towards men have gone unchanged.I have ...
A. 14 October 2009: its too early to tell. and youre too young to make such a decision about your sexuality. just be open to yourself. dont block your true feelings or even opportunities. be open but dont be reckless. the answer lies within yourself. no one can ever ... (read in full...)
I want to 'come out' but how do I tell my best friend without losing him?
Q. Im 18 years old, and i have known i was gay for a while now. I have yet to tell anyone about my sexuality and im worried that alot of my friends and family may not be ok with it. Particulary, the person i consider my best friend, i already think he ...
A. 13 October 2008: hey bro. to put simply, the best person to tell about this is your best friend. really.
im 18 as well and i told my best friend a couple of months ago. she was definitely surprised for there's no speck of swish or mannerisms that show im gay (im ... (read in full...)
I was happy sleeping with other men to please my husband, but he doesn't want me to anymore.
Q. after we had been married about five years, my husband told me he wanted me to have sex with other men and he wanted to watch. i told him i didn't want to, but he begged and begged me to do this and i finally told him i would. he brought home a ...
A. 30 May 2008: I believe this kind of 'sexual fantasy' is called a "Cuckold". Sure it is weird or 'bad' for some other people to judge, but i kind of know something (i googled it before) about this. The spouse who wants this kind of relationship get... (read in full...)
What is the best way to "come out"?
Q. What's is the best way to be "OUT"? I'm afraid to tell everyone that I am a bisexual? Or worse, a gay? Anyone can help me?...
A. 28 May 2008: jess. coming out to your friends/family is 90% never easy. i guess it will really be your choice if you want to stay in the closet. and it's really hard to live a lie.
I have only come out to my 2 closest friends and it felt amazing to be able ... (read in full...)
Why do people get put off more by gay men than women?
Q. Hi. good day! I just want to hear some opinions/comments from people from different sides of the world. It's just that i observe the general community here and even the world (in general) in how they accept homosexuals. Would people agree wit...
A. 13 May 2008: Hi again. Thanks for the replies! It does seem that this things happen globally,right?!
True that it sucks coz for one when straight men think of 2women together the only thing they can think about is being in bed with those 2 women.
But i w... (read in full...)
My husband and my brother??
Q. My husband recently admitted, after 24 years of marriage, that he's been having an affair with my gay brother for the past three years. They've just moved in together, leaving me with three kids (ages 16, 12 and 8) and all the bills to pay. I work...
A. 30 April 2008: This is a hard situation for you. And to handle it all by yourself is brave but at the same time stubborn. I believe your (ex?)husband still has an obligation and responsibility to support you and your 3 kids. He can't and should not just leave ... (read in full...)
My parents are constantly complaining. I'm doing everything properly, so why??
Q. My parents stop me or complain constantly when i do things properly. I play the organ, cycle and run alot and most recently i have taken up karate. I stay active as a way to control my agression. However my parents constantly have a go saying i am c...
A. 27 April 2008: Do you have any idea why they bug you so much about this issue? Maybe because you tend to forget to study or do some other responsibility? But, i believe that is not the case. You just have to ask them plain what do they want or dont want from ... (read in full...)
I'm becoming more interested in gay sex, what is wrong with me?
Q. This is a bit of a strange question but one I am curious about. You know how some men find two women together a turn on, well I find two guys together a turn on. I've got this problems which just seems to get bigger and bigger, I feel as if I am ...
A. 27 April 2008: Hmm. I guess this kind of fantasy turns you on and some people because it is somewhat.... taboo and not essentialy natural for most. In deed, i also have had lesbian sex and gay sex fantasies and it turns me on a different level than the ... (read in full...)
I have found God and decided against my relations with me. Will this leave me lonely?
Q. When I was growing up, I was sure that I would turn out gay. My first crush was for a guy who lived down my street, and later, in adolescence, men featured in my fantasies. Then a girl came along who blew my mind. We were together throughout our ...
A. 25 April 2008: I see, I see.
Well, the 'woman world' is different than the 'man world' but i believe it's on the same plane.
It tends to be hard to understand women at times since they have different wants/needs/priorities compared to us males. But the s... (read in full...)
I have found God and decided against my relations with me. Will this leave me lonely?
Q. When I was growing up, I was sure that I would turn out gay. My first crush was for a guy who lived down my street, and later, in adolescence, men featured in my fantasies. Then a girl came along who blew my mind. We were together throughout our ...
A. 24 April 2008: Sorry if this'll be like a weird argument, but CollaRoy has a point and i just would like to clear it up.
Ok, fine, given that you are bi-sexual (not gay!), what made you decide that you dont want to have relations with men anymore? WHAT MAKES IT... (read in full...)
I end up falling for straight guys again and again...could this guy be different?
Q. Hey there, I really need some advice re my feelings for a colleague. I am a gay man in my early thirties, though have never been in a relationship as such. However, for as long as I can remember, I have always focused my attentions on on...
A. 6 April 2008: hi well yeah, him being touchy can be or can not be a sign and can be hard to figure him out. are there any 'mannerisms' or maybe a certain kind of walk he does that maybe hints he is gay or straight? but really, more than thinking and que... (read in full...)
Love-struck
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm losing my mind, help me please. I am a 24 year old man who always didn't find a way to connect with people on a close and intimate level due to the fact that my way of thinking is completely unacceptable in my community. I hav...
A. 20 March 2008: Hi again! It's gonna be quite tough not knowing if your guy also likes you or not. You say that he already told you that, "You're someone I've been looking for all my life." Though unsure if there is a deeper feel in that statement, you should tell ... (read in full...)
Love-struck
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm losing my mind, help me please. I am a 24 year old man who always didn't find a way to connect with people on a close and intimate level due to the fact that my way of thinking is completely unacceptable in my community. I hav...
A. 19 March 2008: First of all, are you gay? Or it just so happens that the person you wanted to love and understand you was a man? Well it seems you are madly crazily in love with this one. and you're at 'paranoid border' to see him, hear him, talk to him. To ... (read in full...)
Should I have a threesome with my gay best friend, and his new bi boyfriend? I'm bisexual
Q. My best friend is a gay man. We're really close to eachother and I feel as if I can to him about anything. I don't tend to get on with other girls that well as I find that girls tend to get quite bitchy towards me and so my relationship with my ...
A. 19 March 2008: This is an amazing opportunity for you to explore your sexuality but you still should put serious thought in it. I guess what we all are concerned about is YOU. If you want to do this with your best friend and his guy you do it becuase you want to. ... (read in full...)
My friends are angry that I want to break up with him as it was them that got us together.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 5 months but I don't think we really have anything in common, my friends fixed us up and I talking 2 them about breaking up with him and they were really mad but I like another guy who my friends hate. ...
A. 29 February 2008: True true! It's your (love) life and they can't decide who you like or don't like. All they can do is to introduce someone they like that maybe you'd also like. Tell them that you can't force yourself into liking or loving someone that you simply ... (read in full...)
I am bi and have fallen for my best mate
Q. Im bi and i've fallen in love with my best friend. He knows i fancy him but im pretty sure he dosent know im in love with him. I cant just go on pretending and im thinking of making a move. What do i do?...
A. 27 February 2008: i agree with mckenzie. you should first talk with him and ask him if he is honestly straight,gay,bi,or bi-curious. If it is definitely ok with him that you're bi, you should tell him (maybe in time if not now) that you have feelings for him and if ... (read in full...)
I'm gay, how do I get the confidence to even start to show someone I like them?
Q. I have no confidence with my self. I had a girlfriend for years. Went i turned 16 i started to let my ture feelings show. I came out to my friends and sister also my girlfriend and now my dad and family. I am now 19 and have not had a relationsh...
A. 26 February 2008: I believe it's the same with issues with being straight. You just kinda have to be sure that he IS gay. I mean, you can't ask him out on a date then find out he was straight and not gay. Confidence can be boosted just by knowing that there is ... (read in full...)
I've got a problem being open about being gay. What do I do?
Q. Hi i have a problem. i'm a masculine guy and i have always known that i liked guys but would always aviod actually meeting any as i enjoyed the thought of being with a man but knew if it actually came to the real thing i would run for the hills, s...
A. 26 February 2008: I kind of get where you're coming from. And it's just that you (and i as well) are afraid of how the world would judge you when you come out of the closet. It's because the world suggests and that of 'normality' states that Adam should go with Eve ... (read in full...)
I found out she's bisexual.. It's freaking me out!
Q. I'm not homophobic, and I have nothing against people that choose not to be straight, but my quite close friend has basically told me she's bisexual... Now I feel watched by her when I'm around her. I know it's ridiculous, and that if she was a gu...
A. 7 February 2008: It is true that most homosexuals may it be gay or bisexual DID NOT choose to be their sexual preference. But there are also just some that were just influenced due to environment issues -for example having 4 sisters and being the only boy between ... (read in full...)
How do you know if you're gay?
Q. Okay, so I don't know if I'm gay, straight, or bi. My first pornographic experience was near 5th grade, and I sorta got hooked since. I've been looking at boys from time to time, and I even thought some of the boys in my school were cute as I grew ...
A. 31 January 2008: Hello. Fortunately for you, i can help you on both cases:
1. figure out if you're gay bi straight.
2. how to lose weight.
First and foremost, be more specific if what kind of pornography you were exposed when you were just 5th gr... (read in full...)
How can he be gay and have feelings for me? I'm really confused.
Q. Iam a 20 heterosexual female. Ive had the same best friend since I was seven years old. He happens to be a gay man. He has always been my best friend. I love him and he means more to me than anything or anyone. He came out of the closet to to me ...
A. 13 January 2008: Wow. I am amazed. First of all, don't feel guilty for what happened! Besides the point that he is gay, he still made love with you as someone IN love. The simple fact that you let him do it with you, and liked it at the same time means that you also ... (read in full...)
I like guys but am wondering if I could be bi?
Q. hey i like guys alot but i think i could be bi i think some girls are good lookin and when i think about it girls turn me on and guys dont that much i havet had sex yet with a girl or a boy trouble is guys dont turn me on girls do am i bi? or bi ...
A. 13 January 2008: Hi. I believe i can help you here. But i first need to know your age. And no offense, but somehow i also need to know how 'mature' you are in your sexual preference. What do you mean you like women sexually and men not really, and at the same time ... (read in full...)
I'm experimenting with my sexuality and my bf was first ok with me dating other men as well, but now he has changed his mind! Is it wrong of him to change the rules halfway through, or am I just being unreasonable?
Q. I'm bisexual and recently entered into a long distance relationship with a guy on the proviso that i be allowed to experiment with other guys because i have no sexual experience and am still in the middle of discovering who i am. At first he ag...
A. 27 December 2007: Wow. I actually dont need to post any advice any more since even from the very first person who have posted advice for you, they are indeed such great advice for you.
Again, you are still in the process of exploring and discovering your self. So... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but my family are pressuring me to meet him, and I'm worried about some issues they might have
Q. Ok so here's my problem...would like everyone to keep an open mind. I'm a 17 year old gay guy...comfortable with my sexuality and all that. So about a year ago i started seeing an older guy. I've always known i liked older guys (hey, it's just ...
A. 27 December 2007: Hmmm. First of all, you have to try to confront your parents and tell them that they shouldnt judge this cute guy of yours with just his age but with how and what he does. Yes, just like Ms. Anonymous have said, since you're still young and still ... (read in full...)
How do I tell if I am bisexual?
Q. ummm Hi. so, im kinda confused about my sexuality. I think I might be bisexual. And if that's the case, i like a girl i know. It seems like she's always flirting with me. She told me she is not bisexual, though. But Im thinking she's confuse...
A. 18 December 2007: In my case, I knew i was bi because i know i like women and men too. And i accepted it. But of course i had to explore and understand myself more towards liking men so that indeed, i'd know if i am bi. And turns out, i am bi!
but really, you dont... (read in full...)
What advice should I give her?
Q. ok so i have a crush on a really cool girl. we are both 14. but the only problem is she has a gf. her parents are trying to hook us up. although she has a gf me and her have kissed whilst she was going out with her gf. she doesnt like being gay but ...
A. 18 December 2007: Hey. You don't have to be the guy to step up and do something for their relationship. As her friend, you should just be there for her in times when she is depressed. And i believe, you are already doing a good job at being a very good friend to her. ... (read in full...)
I have a crush on another girl, but I didn't admit to her I am bisexual too. Don't feel ready to tell her, so what should I do?
Q. Okay so ever since I was younger I've been attracted to both boys and girls. So lately I've been hanging out with my friend who is Bi and I have a crush on her. The problem is I haven't came out yet about being bi. And a few days ago somebody...
A. 15 December 2007: Hey. haha, i agree with flynn. Hmmm. BUT i guess 'coming out' as bi is still 'coming out'. i mean, its just that being a bi girl is more accepted than just lesb. Thus, i think the stress or pressure shouldnt be that much to handle compared to being ... (read in full...)
I'm 15 and lesbian... should I come out? I fear the negative reactions!
Q. Hi, I'm 15 and have been fairly certain I was gay/lesbian since everyone else started getting crushes on guys... and I started having them on girls. I only really accepted it about 7 or 8 months ago though, and a couple of months after that I got ...
A. 15 December 2007: Hey. I agree with miss hwocomehoney there. There really is no way to tell if it's just a phase or it aint. I believe the only thing you can do now is wait and do the little stuff that can make you grow more into YOU. you shouldnt announce yet or ... (read in full...)
I fantasise about guys, not girls. Does that make me gay?
Q. Hi yeah i am only 16 years old I like girls but when i get horny the first thing that comes to my mind is gay sex, but when i am not horny anymore my mind tells me i am not gay,but i start to think and want guys in my life sexually everyday.....i ...
A. 14 December 2007: hey man. Me too! Or so i think... I like women but not as much as men sexually. I dont mind having a relationship either with a guy or a girl. But since i am turned on by men sexually, i kinda have a better prefrence for men in a relationship.
... (read in full...)
I'm gay and my friend says he's straight, so why does he let me do things with him?
Q. I am gay and my friend says he is not but he lets me do something to him. is he in denial or straight guys do that?...
A. 19 November 2007: There are a lot of possibilities in confronting this issue.
It can be that he is curious how different it is with a man than a woman. Or he's THAT horny to take on men too (given that he is indeed straight). Probably he is bi and trying to under... (read in full...)
I love him and don't want to hurt him, so how do I tell him in the best possible way that I cannot live like this anymore?
Q. I have been in a gay relationship with my bf for over three years. He is older than I am and we love each other but for a long time now he has treated me more like a friend not a bf which is hard considering we live together and sleep beside each ...
A. 19 November 2007: Well simply, love is never a one way thing. You love him dearly, but you don't feel any on his end. Tell him what you're having now can not really be called a 'relationship' since from you side you're the only one doing for the other.
I guess it... (read in full...)
Pretending to be gay to get closer to girls? He brought me expensive jewelry - from his supposed bf. What does he expect in return?
Q. I'm 16 and one of my best friends says he's gay. however, he sometimes treats me in ways which make me wonder if he is just saying he's gay in order to get closer to girls. the other day he bought me some expensive jewelry which he said was from his ...
A. 16 November 2007: Hmmm. I actually have a friend who used that kind of approach to this girl he really liked. It turned out fine though since the girl liked him back even though she first thought he was gay. LoL. Are you certain that you dont like him? if you dont... (read in full...)
How can I overcome my insecurity and learn to trust again?
Q. Hi, I am a 22 year old guy, and I am very sensitive, very committed, and very respectful, about a year ago I broke up with my ex because she fell pregnant... by another man, so as you could imagine, I was devastated and my life went pretty dire from ...
A. 13 November 2007: I guess i can relate since i am sensitive and all as well.
I know trusting is a really really big issue. But love is all about taking risks and hoping that by the end of the day you still love her/him in the morning. You just have to discuss ... (read in full...)
How do you chase away the feeling of emptyness/"alone in a crowd?"
Q. There are times when I feel very down, insecure and worried. I feel like no one would notice if I disappeared. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I feel very alone, you know the saying 'alone in a crowd' it applies very well to me because thats ...
A. 13 November 2007: Hmm. I believe you are askin the wrong question. Or so i think... I believe when someone disappears someone, even just one person, will notice, remember, and miss that you are gone or missing. The question is what they would do about it. I mean, i ... (read in full...)
Do friendship and love come together?
Q. hi, when you fall in love with a freind, and he already loved you for so long, but now his love has gotten less.and you date for a little and he just says that he doesn't wanna ruin your freindship ! what can you do? i love him and he loves me (not...
A. 13 November 2007: That's a tight situation. You say he has already loved you before, does that mean you knew or he just said it recently when he was already over you? If you knew, then the mistake was on your part since you did not entertain this feeling from him. ... (read in full...)
How do I keep my boyfriend away from this gay guy?
Q. i have a huge problem my best friend "guy" is inlove with my boyfriend!! i know my best friend for 6 years through this years i didnt know he was gay and actually i knew my boyfriend from him and because of me they are really good friends and i hate ...
A. 13 November 2007: It's either:
1. You're just paranoid about your bestfriend being gay and being scared that they have something going on. They are just close friends. and no matter how gay your bestfriend is, your boy friend still respects him and apprecia... (read in full...)
Can you be gay and yet fancy someone of the opposite sex??
Q. Can you actually be gay (and when i say gay i'm not including bi-sexual) and yet fancy or love someone of the opposite sex?...
A. 10 November 2007: I believe you cannot really 'love' someone of the opposite sex without being on any bisexual level, even on a small and partial scale. If love, you mean an intimate relationship where you like that girl, and not like a 'friendly' love... then NO. If ... (read in full...)
Are there any Bi guys out there that can tell me what's going on here?
Q. hi all! i'm in a bit of a situation. I am a straight woman and have recently gotten even closer to my gay best friend. We hang out all the time, can talk about everything and anything, and when i sleep at his house (sometimes 3-4 times a week) we ...
A. 24 October 2007: hi person.
I am bi. i'd like to share something on being bi. Bisexuality does not necessarily mean liking both sides equally. sometimes preference to men is more dominant than liking women (such is my case). But some mainly like women but also... (read in full...)
How can you tell if you're really gay or if you're just in a phase?
Q. How do you know if your gay? How do you tell if it's just a phase or for real?...
A. 22 October 2007: **Sorry kid, there really is no right and straight answer for your QUESTION but.. you'll know what you are when you feel something out of the ordinary. ü
Anyway, good luck ;D... (read in full...)
How can you tell if you're really gay or if you're just in a phase?
Q. How do you know if your gay? How do you tell if it's just a phase or for real?...
A. 21 October 2007: Hey! I agree with the 2nd to the last anonymous guy who posted. Though I have a different story. i mean, when i found out i was bi. I liked MEN (not boys...) since when i was REALLY young (like 6 or 7 i think?). i mean i am not femi and all but i ... (read in full...)
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