| Latest articles: For all women
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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An equal loving relationship between three, where all are involved. Possible, or not?
Q. So, the short... I've been married to my husband, who i love from depths i cannot describe, just over a year now. But he has a part of him that i want to understand and support but still sometimes doubt if i am really capable of making work. He...
A. 10 April 2009: Since you ask for sincere advice, I can tell you I don't think this kind of arrangement will ever work. There might be more than one way to look at this situation. One can be that you seem to be looking for someone who is bisexual and can ... (read in full...)
Shouldn't DC be a judge-free zone?
Q. I've noticed that a lot of people have posted questions on this site asking about anal sex [how to do it/tips/tricks etc]. And last time I checked this was a site designed to give people advice and and information about relationships and and ...
A. 9 April 2009: I disagree. Dear Cupid should perhaps be a web site where we aunts, uncles, cousins and whatever would ideally not insult anyone. But, like Good Great Eyes just pointed out, there is no way anyone can respond to some posts without judging or ... (read in full...)
Age and appearance.
Q. Do guys like girls with fat round faces and who are short and heavy because I am short, fat round face and heavy. Up on my 30s and I never had boyfriend, I wouldn't know how to get one. I am sick of liking guys who don't like me. A guy of nice ...
A. 9 April 2009: If you saw yourself under a more loving light, more people would be attracted to you. Looks are not all, dear. In fact, looks are not at all important if you are smart and you want a long relationship, which is, I guess, what you want.
Admit... (read in full...)
Scared and Numb
Q. Dear Cupid, I am 23 and have been married for 2 years and have a beautiful baby boy who is 18 months old. My situation in indeed tough and stressful. I am married to a woman who is from South America and I live here her and my son live dow...
A. 7 April 2009: It is awful that your wife said you will never see your son again, and that he will never know who you are. I don't know where in South America they are, but in all of our countries fathers have rights, too. This is not a comment you should take ... (read in full...)
I HATE SEX!
Q. i have been married to him for 11 years, we have 4 children. we own 2 businesses. at the end of the day i want to go to bed and he wants intimacy and/or sex. i HATE sex! I dont like being held, i want my space. i love him, we have built a life ...
A. 6 April 2009: It seems, then, that the real problem is that he wants you to be always willing and within arm's reach. I know that upsets many a woman.
It is sad that apparently there is no way out of this. It seems you have tried to let him know how you feel... (read in full...)
I'm 56 and searching for the right answers!
Q. i was married 27 yrs, divorced, regret it. remarried, a man that is an alcoholic and smokes about 3 packs a day. he shows no interest in me but that i bring home my paycheck and he has someone to keep the house from feeling lonely when he comes ...
A. 6 April 2009: I agree with the guys and the girls. You can leave this relationship and start anew.... (read in full...)
Can giving head cause a throat infection?
Q. I'm really sick, I have a throat infection and I gave my boyfriend head this week. Is it possible that giving head can cause a throat infection. I know he's clean for std's, but I'm not sure since urine passes through there, it might cause a throat ...
A. 6 April 2009: Your question is whether fellatio gave you a throat infection. Maybe so, but we can't know. Maybe the infection was already there before the fellatio.
However, you have been given good information. You know that many diseases pass from one pers... (read in full...)
What do guys prefer...?
Q. Do guys only go for gorgeous looking girls and not plain looking girls?...
A. 6 April 2009: Well, I remember watching Gilligan's Island and I liked both girls. Can I have both?
Now, seriously, it is very clear that we men are attracted to very different sorts of women. What one man finds hot, another does not. Don't worry. Let me a... (read in full...)
I HATE SEX!
Q. i have been married to him for 11 years, we have 4 children. we own 2 businesses. at the end of the day i want to go to bed and he wants intimacy and/or sex. i HATE sex! I dont like being held, i want my space. i love him, we have built a life ...
A. 6 April 2009: I believe you would need to determine whether you hate sex, in itself, whether you hate sex with him, or whether you hate sex with him at this moment, because you feel you're just recovering. As you can see, these are three very different things.
... (read in full...)
Is my co-worker hitting on me?
Q. is my coworker he hitting on me? I started working for a new real estate firm. This guy started about 2 months after I did. We agreed to help each other through the real estate business, ideas, motivation, etc. I actually moved desks to be closer...
A. 6 April 2009: I believe that he is flirting with you, with obvious intentions. I also believe you like that, and you flirt back.
I think that the decision you need to make here is whether you will continue with the flirting or not. I already said it, but I wa... (read in full...)
With an age difference of 31 years why would he be interested in me?
Q. Is it possible for an older man 52 to love a younger woman 21. Why would a older gentleman be interested in having a family with someone this age instead of an older experienced woman who would have her priorities together like him. ...
A. 6 April 2009: In my humble opinion, this is a very good question, and one that is sure to produce a few blisters on some skins :-). But here's my two cents.
I don't know the fifty-two year old man involved, or the twenty-one year old girl, our poster. So I wi... (read in full...)
I had my heart set on a handsome Latino, but I feel like I missed the boat.
Q. Sorry this is long... I tried to keep it concise but I wanted it to be complete. I've been feeling blue about a guy for a long time, a friend from college. I'm confused because my love for him has faded, and I know I need to move on, but... it's ...
A. 6 April 2009: With good reason.... (read in full...)
We are considering a structured open relationship. Good or bad idea?
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years and I just broke up because I can't see him sexually and have no sexual attraction to him. After a few days of being miserable, we talked and he said he was willing to consider a structured open relationship, which is what I ...
A. 5 April 2009: In my opinion, your boyfriend feels that the only way he can keep you is consent to your finding sexual relief with someone else. This isn't something he would agree to if he were not desperate not to lose you. I am afraid that many problems will ... (read in full...)
What's your take on Manscaping?
Q. Hi Everyone, What's your take on Manscaping? Do you think a man should keep his pubic region trimmed, natural, shaved? I see lots of girls ask about this but I think it is becoming more common for men as well. I know it is personal prefere...
A. 3 April 2009: My take on "manscaping" (funny new word) is, do it if you like, don't do it if you don't.... (read in full...)
Important and interesting job question for all of the readers!
Q. After being unemployed for quite some time, I decided to take a job a little while ago and the pay wasnt so good but I took it because I couldnt afford to not be unemployed anymore and I actually liked the job - the role itself is almost like a ...
A. 1 April 2009: Many people find themselves in jobs they don't like because they need the money. I believe satisfaction from what you do can hardly be overestimated. However, if you're making TOO little to do for a living, you have to go elsewhere. If the ... (read in full...)
Is it ever a good idea to let the husband of a married woman know that she is cheating on him?
Q. Is it ever a good idea to let the husband of a married woman know that she is cheating on him? These are my neighbors and friends but not super great friends. They've been married for 19 years. I've seen her leave a bar late one night with a str...
A. 1 April 2009: It is easy to feel that you should tell the husband that he is being cheated on. Not telling him feels like betrayal. Or, like seeing someone is being robbed and doing nothing.
However, human beings are not easy. I am sure you expect the neig... (read in full...)
An explosive geyser or a dribble?
Q. Men and Women: What is the most you have ever ejaculated in one sex session? What do you think contributed to the amount of ejaculate you had?...
A. 1 April 2009: Research -and common-sense observation- let you see that a man ejaculates an amount of sperm that depends on:
1) whether he had ejaculated a short time before that
2) the "degree" of pleasure he felt
Now, one "sex session" can mean many things... (read in full...)
He walked out on me, 3 kids, home and bills!
Q. I am a single mother of three children My youngest is 22mnths old and her father walked out on me on his birthday. I do admit I went overboard with the breakup but now I having problems because I want him back. My question is I have not called ...
A. 1 April 2009: I'm sorry to hear you're in such a difficult situation at such a young age. If I were in your position I would feel like the sky were falling down on me.
I think you need to act quickly and decidedly. Unfortunately, you must also act assuming... (read in full...)
I told my husband I don't want his child (from his previous marriage) to be near mine
Q. Well do you think i'm wrong to have told my spouse that i don't want this child that he has gotten outside our home near my child. I told him that i know the child is innocent to what he and the child's mother has done but due to there disr...
A. 30 March 2009: If I understand your post correctly, your husband had a child with another woman. I am not sure whether this happened BEFORE you were married, or after marriage.
If it happened before, then you are being selfish. Wear his shoes: would you like... (read in full...)
My family doesn't approve of the big age gap between me and my guy
Q. Dear agony aunt, i recently posted a qeustion regarding the same situation but just need a bit more advice Ive been dating a 56 year old man and im 18, weve been together 7months and i have never been happier. At work we dont tell anyone about our...
A. 30 March 2009: In my honest opinion, people have reason to worry about this big age gap. We're talking about thirty-eight years. That's a very, very big difference in mindset, experience, behavior and future expectations. He could be your grandfather. So, I ... (read in full...)
Should I expect my man only to be interested in sex when we met whilst I was working in the sex industry?
Q. after meeting my man while i worked in the sex industry, should i have expected him to only show interest in being with me if we were having sex?...
A. 28 March 2009: No, if he showed interest in you, you were perfectly entitled to expect him to be interested in a lot more than just sex. You were perfectly entitled to expect him to be interested in all of you.... (read in full...)
Have I been stupid in trying to help her conceive?
Q. I'm in a crazy situation. One of my friends, a girl my age, has asked me to do something for her. Let me say that I have always been attracted to her, she is quite the beautiful lady, but it could never go further than friendship. She's one of thes...
A. 26 March 2009: Please, take no offense, but I do believe you have made a big mistake, and, also, that you have not been "very smart" to help her conceive.
The woman you describe has reduced the number of men she could condescend to date to just a few. I don't ... (read in full...)
Serious wife issues
Q. My wife had a male best friend prior to our marriage. While dating, she had me meet her at her work in order to actually meet him. As an introduction, she stated, "I'd like you to meet AA, he's my life." This upset me some, as we were planning on ...
A. 26 March 2009: I changed my mind. I still agree with Kelly in the sense that she needs to choose, but I don't think this can be summarized as her needing male attention.
AA may be just a friend, or not. We don't know. The poster needs to know, because,... (read in full...)
"I am a good man without money" What does it mean???
Q. Hello, I have been dating this man for 8 months now , He first told me when we met that he dated other women and even got engaged but broke up because of money issues he said he just leaves when any women makes any money demands he said he alway...
A. 26 March 2009: My two cents: I do understand the man. He is afraid women are only interested in his money. Maybe that happened to him in the past. Or, he's very tight. Either way, he's warning you: you won't get any money from him, not even something that is ... (read in full...)
The woman I get along great with has commitment issues.... Thoughts?
Q. So I 'reconnected' with a girl I knew a while back through friends of mine at a wedding last month. Had a great time with her at the wedding, asked my friend for her number, and for the last month we've been hanging out alot and just this weekend ...
A. 26 March 2009: In my way of speaking, she knew you were interested in her but took her time to decide whether you were what she wants. You accepted to wait for her to make her mind up. Now she made her mind: you are not what she wants, so she's dumping you. ... (read in full...)
She deleted messages to other guys "by mistake!!!" Hmmmmmm...
Q. I am getting married in a few months, I have been with her for over 4 years and love her with all of my heart but the other day I was on her computer and found some messages that she had sent to other guys and I decided to read what they had talked ...
A. 26 March 2009: Like the rest of the people said, I would be worried, too. It's only by chance, I suppose, that she kept them for a long time and the "accident" happened just when you asked her about them.
The problem here is that you have no "proof". I assume... (read in full...)
Serious wife issues
Q. My wife had a male best friend prior to our marriage. While dating, she had me meet her at her work in order to actually meet him. As an introduction, she stated, "I'd like you to meet AA, he's my life." This upset me some, as we were planning on ...
A. 26 March 2009: I agree with Kelly.... (read in full...)
How do you get tested for HIV/AIDS? Is it a urine test? or what?
Q. This is probably going to be a long one but I'm worried! Recently I've been thinking about getting a HIV test but I'm too scared to do it and to tell anyone, I'm not sure if I'm positive or not, I've had sexual intercourse with about 7 people u...
A. 25 March 2009: Oops! I forgot to mention that not using a condom also puts you at risk of giving the disease to someone else.... (read in full...)
How do you get tested for HIV/AIDS? Is it a urine test? or what?
Q. This is probably going to be a long one but I'm worried! Recently I've been thinking about getting a HIV test but I'm too scared to do it and to tell anyone, I'm not sure if I'm positive or not, I've had sexual intercourse with about 7 people u...
A. 25 March 2009: Since the disease is out there, you're naturally scared that you might get it. There is no guarantees you never will, just as there is no guarantee you won't get prostate cancer or leprosy or any other disease. However, you can, with your ... (read in full...)
Opinions on women going braless
Q. Well I have been doing some research and I keep finding out that it has never been proven that bras help keep breast firm, or stop them from sagging. I've been thinking about this issue, and what bras mean in the bigger picture, and I just don't ...
A. 24 March 2009: I've heard very often that bras do help maintain breasts firm. I think this is one aspect in which perhaps you should err on the side of caution; that is to say, maybe you should wear a good bra. Whether you will do it or not, that's your ... (read in full...)
Are all women not created equal?
Q. Just wondering if anyone knows is it possible for all women to squirt when they have an orgasm? I have been trying and not having any luck is there a trick to it or are all women not created equal (lol)?...
A. 24 March 2009: Fortunately, all women are not created equal :-).... (read in full...)
How can I tell her diplomatically that I'm not interested?
Q. Hello people, first of all I would thank all my friends for their kind support in my earlier question. I have a serious problem guys, I am 21 and my girlfriend is 18. I got hooked to a girl a year ago just for the heck of it!! She's the ugliest ...
A. 24 March 2009: I agree with Uncle Phil. By the way, it seems to me that she's not a psycho. It's just that you're afraid of the consequences.... (read in full...)
I've had 2 abortions and I solely regret having them now...
Q. Hi, I'm 24 year old female, I've had 2 abortions. I had the first one in August 2007 and thereafter in January 2008. The first time I was so scared I didn't even think of anything but my fear of my parents and my boyfriend at that time not at all ...
A. 24 March 2009: This is a difficult post with different angles. One could be why a 24 year old is having two abortions in a matter of months with a boyfriend she has issues with. Another angle is what this girl is going through because of the abortions and the ... (read in full...)
WHEN do you think I should call her?
Q. Hi, This weekend I exchanged numbers with this girl that I work with. We have exchanged interest in each other and both find each other attractive. I am only 17 and I was wondering how long I should wait to call her? I really like her and she talks ...
A. 24 March 2009: Call her, by all means. But not tomorrow. Wait ONE WEEK. I know, I know people will say that's too long, that you will keep her hanging, et cetera, but do it. Why? Because you want to be sure that she's interested. If she can't stay interested ... (read in full...)
My ex was hurt pretty badly in an accident..what should I do?
Q. Dear Cupid Its been over a year since i had anything you could even call a relationship, my previous girl friend tore me up pretty bad by cheating and basically compromiseing my morality and self image. I recently learned that my ex-girlfriend wa...
A. 24 March 2009: Being there for her in this bad moment is a very good and caring thing to do, provided you don't do it to get her back. It is understandable that you care about her and I am sure she will know why you're around, but be very careful not to demand ... (read in full...)
My husband allowed me to have sex with someone else
Q. My husband allowed me to have sex with someone else. Could he love me?...
A. 23 March 2009: Yep, I agree we need more info. We just don't know what happened. The situation could go from his agreeing to let you have sex with someone else, because you ask him to, to "inviting" you to have sex with another man because he doesn't want you ... (read in full...)
I want a permanent future!
Q. My boyfriend had several girl's numbers in his cell. We have been together for over a year. I finally got the nerve to ask him why he still had them in his cell. When I did he got really mad! He said I bring drama because a few weeks ago I had ...
A. 23 March 2009: It doesn't sound good to me that you can't ask him questions about where the relationship is going. I understand you have doubts. I believe the only way out is to say something like "Hey, I want to ask you something and don't give me the standard ... (read in full...)
I don’t understand why he won’t grab the chance with me
Q. Hi Does anyone have any advice please on emotionally distant or emotionally unavailable people? I am certain that my man is one of these people. We have known each other for 18 years (we met when we were 18 and are now 36) and during that time...
A. 23 March 2009: I read your update and I feel it makes it clear that you have to ask him what is on his mind. I have the feeling that he likes to have relationships this way. Since that is not what you want, then you have to ask him to make his mind up.... (read in full...)
Met online, had great time but now he says it won't work?
Q. hi met this gut on line dating been out over past 5 weeks chemistry is there he said hed fallen in love with me from the moment he saw me now he says it wont work hes a lovely guy and id like it to work what advice can you give i miss him...
A. 23 March 2009: It's sad, but sometimes we like a person initially, and then we find things we don't like and can't live with. Maybe this is what happened?
In any case, if he says it won't work, don't push it. Accepting such things is a hard thing, but the righ... (read in full...)
I don’t understand why he won’t grab the chance with me
Q. Hi Does anyone have any advice please on emotionally distant or emotionally unavailable people? I am certain that my man is one of these people. We have known each other for 18 years (we met when we were 18 and are now 36) and during that time...
A. 23 March 2009: It seems he's telling you the truth: he obviously has feelings for you but isn't sure he should have a relationship. That might be because he is happy with his life as it is. Maybe he's used to living on his own and now finds it difficult to have ... (read in full...)
DO men really love their girlfriends or wives if they are capable of treating them like that?
Q. I don't know what to do. My boyfriend has spat on me, called be a whore, thrown a candle into the bathtub, he has accused me of meeting with someone during the 15 minutes that he was gone and I was sitting in the bathtub before putting on my ...
A. 20 March 2009: The real question should be whether this particular man loves you. I guess the answer is no.
Nobody is perfect, so expect some bad things from the person who loves you most. I don't think this man is that person, however. You should take him... (read in full...)
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