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Article - (26 December 2008) 11 Comments - (Newest, 14 March 2016)
A male Mexico age 51-59, Danielepew writes:

Something one of my aunts sent me:

When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before term, they put me into an incubator... with dark glasses.

My mom never breastfed me; she said we were only friends. So, instead of breastfeeding me, she would sit with her back to me. That must be why I'm this short. So short, indeed, that I'm not short, but deep.

I've always been a hairy guy, too. People always asked my mom: "Miss, did you give birth to him, or just wove him?

My dad always kept the little picture of a baby that came with his wallet.

Pretty soon, I realized that my parents hated me. My bathtub toys were a radio and a toaster.

One day I got lost. I asked the policeman whether he thought we would ever find my parents, and he said "I dunno, there's just so many places they could be hiding in".

Once I was kidnapped. The kidnappers chopped one of my fingers and sent it to my parents, to ask for a ransom. My mom said that she needed further evidence.

I had to work since I was very young. I worked at a veterinary clinic. People would always ask me how much they were selling me for.

Once, this chick called me home and said "Come home; nobody's here". When I got there, nobody was there, really.

My wife loves our conversations after sex. She always calls me, no matter what hotel she's staying in.

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A female reader, Abella United States +, writes (14 March 2016):

Abella agony aunta little laugher a day keeps the Dr away. I like apples, but humor is even better.

This was a really great article. I think i'll add it to my list of great articles.

We all need some light hearted levity at times.

Well done to the Mod who approved this article. Thx Taste of India.

Regards

Abella

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A female reader, Denise32 United States +, writes (27 July 2010):

Denise32 agony auntWhen I was younger, I went on a strange sort of vacation with my parents.......my Dad was driving some VERY "twisty" roads and said: "These darn roads must have been designed by drunkards when the devil was chasing them....."

Loved your stories!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009):

when i was a kid one year we were coming home from colorado and we had driven miles without finding a place to stop for the night. My mom said maybe there will be a motel in litterbarrell, texas. My dad said LITTERBARRELL? she said, the sign said litterbarrell 2 miles!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009):

my mom was stopped by the police for running a stop sign. The officer said, 'ma'am, im going to give you a citation.' She said, 'oh, THANK you officer, i was afraid i was going to get a ticket!'

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2009):

my favorite memory of summer is learning to swim. It wasnt that hard after i got out of the towsack...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2009):

i told my mother...'but ma im tired of going in circles.'... she said, 'shut up kid, or i'll nail your other foot to the floor.' she told me she was sending me on a vacation i told her, 'but ma, i dont want to go to china'...she said, 'shut up kid and keep digging!'

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A male reader, Danielepew Mexico +, writes (5 June 2009):

Danielepew is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Danielepew agony auntWell, this was an actual e-mail. I suppose it's all fake, just for laughing.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2009):

:D .. yet.. :(

I hope your jokes aren't based off of true stories!

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A female reader, iamme2 United States +, writes (31 December 2008):

funny nice if some one had to go through that wow i feel bad for that bastard run kid run

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008):

Hee Hee.Hee Hee.

Thanks for the joke.Wes should probably have more such articles.They bring a smile on when we need them the most.

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A female reader, SirenaBlusera Mexico +, writes (27 December 2008):

SirenaBlusera agony aunt¡El pobre chavo! :(

Jajajaja. Thanks for sharing! A little humor is just what the doctor ordered. :)

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