A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes: Dear CupidIts been over a year since i had anything you could even call a relationship, my previous girl friend tore me up pretty bad by cheating and basically compromiseing my morality and self image. I recently learned that my ex-girlfriend was involved in an acident and was injured rather badly. I am feeling mixed up with guilt and worry. I was wondering if it would be a good idea to see her again, or even contact her... I wrote her out of my life because of what she did, but I still love her, dont know what to do.
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (24 March 2009):
Send her some flowers.
If she hasn't seen you in a long time then she might not want you to see her bruises and stitches.
But if you have done this well in not contacting her then why ruin it now.
You obviously can't forgive what she did so carry on and try to ask out a new girl this week.
Good Luck!! xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2009): I say visit her and bring a cute note saying how your sorry about the accident. I really wouldn't try to form another relationship with her, because it didn't work out before but if you do want to try it out again then do it. Sometimes when people are in accident they grow from it, but some people don't take anything from it. Maybe this would be a good opertunity to make a relationship with her but I dont know her thats why I cant make that judgement call for you.
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A
female
reader, wonderingcat +, writes (24 March 2009):
Is she in the same town as you? Regardless of whether she is an ex or not, if you have time - and clearly you have the heart - go and visit her in person. As Danielepew said, as long as your intention is not to get her back, a friend's visit is almost always appreciated by people who are sick or hospitalized. It shows you care and think about them.
Sometime things happen for a reason. Last week I met a friend who was a workaholic who made a 180 degree change of lifestyle [and attitude in life!] within the last 6 months. Reason? His medical checkup showed that he has arteriosclerosis, and perhaps even more plaques in god knows how many more veins in his body. A complete transformation of a person! He said he time to contemplate and reassess his life and now he wants to be a better person for himself and for others.
So when you visit her, as a friend, she would appreciate it I am sure. Just be there for her. You are a better person for doing so.
Cat
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (24 March 2009):
Being there for her in this bad moment is a very good and caring thing to do, provided you don't do it to get her back. It is understandable that you care about her and I am sure she will know why you're around, but be very careful not to demand that she go back to you because you helped her. If she says she's fine without your help, let her be.
I would suggest sending a rose and a "get well" card, for the time being. Write down that you're there for her is she should need you, and let HER decide.
You have no reason to feel guilty. An accident is an accident.
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