Is this the old him again
Q. I broke up with my husband two months ago we spent a month apart. We split as he had issue with favoritism towards his kids and a dislike of my eldest girl and my father. He also tried to control me. Generally his attitude stunk towards my kids and ...
A. 12 January 2017: You really do need to put your children first here, it really is not fair on them growing up having this man in their lives who makes them feel left out. Please put your children first.... (read in full...)
How do I make my cousin love me back?
Q. Hey guys and girls im 14 year old and im 9th grade i love my girl cousin and she lives in another country so only 3 times i saw her 2006 2011 2016 so this year i loved her so much and we had really really good times but she went to her country back ...
A. 11 January 2017: You need to stay away from your cousin or else you will end up having all off your family having a big huge fall out and over nothing because you will then realize that it was a crush not love but your family will never trust you again. You need to ... (read in full...)
I've agreed to be friends, but he is pulling away from me.
Q. So, there is this guy i used to deal with but now we are supposed to be friends. He has been begging me for friendship for the longest once we established that our relationship couldn't go any further due to our military rankings. Initially,, i was ...
A. 31 October 2016: Sometimes with depression it's not easy to open up and talk to someone. Those closest to him is probably the people he pushes away first. I do think he needs to get help but that can only come from him. ... (read in full...)
I've agreed to be friends, but he is pulling away from me.
Q. So, there is this guy i used to deal with but now we are supposed to be friends. He has been begging me for friendship for the longest once we established that our relationship couldn't go any further due to our military rankings. Initially,, i was ...
A. 30 October 2016: Depression does that to a lot of people ... (read in full...)
How do I make my cousin love me back?
Q. Hey guys and girls im 14 year old and im 9th grade i love my girl cousin and she lives in another country so only 3 times i saw her 2006 2011 2016 so this year i loved her so much and we had really really good times but she went to her country back ...
A. 28 October 2016: Just because you are going to see her next year does not mean you need to talk to her now. If you leave her alone you will be well over her by then.... (read in full...)
How could he have issues with my weight and yet have such mind blowing sex with me?
Q. I'm looking for some perspective on a recent situation I experienced that has left me a bit confused. I dated a guy for about 5-6 months. During the entire relationship, we got alone EXCEEDINGLY well. I have never dated anyone as attentive or ten...
A. 21 October 2016: Don't think that there was anything wrong with you for being with him, because there wasn't. These things happen and he needs to deal with his own issues. It does not mean you cannot trust others, and it does not mean that he never cared and always ... (read in full...)
Slow progress with this guy I like
Q. Why do I get asked out by guys who are married or who are similar to the losers who made my life miserable before. I am a 53 year old woman with grown children and one still at home. Never been married. I am very independent with my own houses. ...
A. 21 October 2016: Hopefully it is not a pity date and he is genuine. Nobody is being negative to you hear, just like you said on your last post, we are all trying to help. We have nothing to gain here only taking time out of our day to help other people. I don't ... (read in full...)
Our wish to adopt a child has provoked some negative reactions, how do we deal with them?
Q. My husband and I have decided to adopt. I was surprised by the negative reaction of some of our friends! I was prepared for the usual fears and prejudices (it's not your flesh and blood, you can never love him the way you would your own etc.) b...
A. 21 October 2016: From reading your update I think you are more than prepared for what is ahead. As said a lot of people think going in to adoption will be all love, toys and fun and sometimes it is not. Off course the same can be said for biological children, as you ... (read in full...)
Depression, drinking and having to go on holiday abroad
Q. I live with my parents, and i'm currently on medication for depression. when my parents have had holidays, ive been able to look after myself and have behaved. I'm seeing a pyschlogist at the moment who is helping me through my troubles. I asked he...
A. 21 October 2016: Maybe the holiday might do you good, you can enjoy spending time as a family, and gain there trust. When you get back maybe you can work towards moving out off home and building a life for yourself. ... (read in full...)
I've agreed to be friends, but he is pulling away from me.
Q. So, there is this guy i used to deal with but now we are supposed to be friends. He has been begging me for friendship for the longest once we established that our relationship couldn't go any further due to our military rankings. Initially,, i was ...
A. 20 October 2016: He does miss you, he wants to be with you, he is trying to get over you but he is finding it hard. Stop being the victim. Block his number tell him good bye and stick to your word. ... (read in full...)
Is lingerie an appropriate birthday gift for my girlfriend?
Q. we've been dating for 6 months. we're really close and intimate. Were both 23. We had sex for the first time a few nights ago. She having a birthday party coming up im thinking about giving lingerie for her birthday. I'm wanting something on the c...
A. 19 October 2016: So many things could go wrong with this. I understand after six months it is still early enough days but am sure you could stretch to a but of jewelry or perfume. ... (read in full...)
I haven't attended church because I have a crush on our pastor
Q. I'm in trouble. I stopped going to a certain christian church three months ago because the pastor would compliment me all the time. He never stopped mentioning how beautiful I am in front of everyone in church. Always after the service he would give ...
A. 19 October 2016: I remember your last post, and you have done the right thing leaving the church. Just because you have saw him this one time does not mean you need to undo all your hard work and go back to his church, that would be a silly move and you know it.
M... (read in full...)
Should I give up on my ex/ maybe boyfriend and go on the date? Does that make me a cheater?Or should I work things out with him?
Q. I am unsure of how to proceed. My ex (I guess) broke up with me back in September because I waned him to spend more time doing things with me because all he did was play video games. I wanted to go out and do things. After a lot of fighting h...
A. 19 October 2016: Tell him it is over, you gave him a chance since your last post and he blew it, he is not going to change. So remove yourself from the situation tell him it is over for good and move on. Go on your date. ... (read in full...)
How could he have issues with my weight and yet have such mind blowing sex with me?
Q. I'm looking for some perspective on a recent situation I experienced that has left me a bit confused. I dated a guy for about 5-6 months. During the entire relationship, we got alone EXCEEDINGLY well. I have never dated anyone as attentive or ten...
A. 17 October 2016: His actions say more than any words do. So believe them and do not let him hurt you with his words. I am not sure why you he would say this to you. My guess is that he wants to hurt you, maybe he wants no contact with you and that is why he said it, ... (read in full...)
My friend is accusing me of being a shitty friend because I like the guy she was cheating on her boyfriend with!
Q. This is a very complex situation, so please bare with me as this story might be a little long-winded. In August, my friend Leslie started hanging out with this guy, Ian, she met through Tinder. They were talking to each other off-and-on for n...
A. 17 October 2016: You go on dates with her so she can hook up with guys behind her boyfriends back? That is not being a good friend.
She sounds selfish and really not a good person if she is going out cheating on her boyfriend if it was me I would end the frie... (read in full...)
Is it OK to have feelings for a second cousin?
Q. Okay, so I'm at the age of 19 and I have found myself falling for my family member named Rachel. She is not far behind me in age, in fact, less than a year younger. We both attend the same church, a Pentecostal church and she happens to be my second ...
A. 17 October 2016: Am not sure never having a boyfriend at the age off 18 is all that rare in fairness. Anyway follow the advice you have been giving and get this fantasy out off your head. Be realistic, how would your family react? How would her family react? Am sure ... (read in full...)
Demands sex but computer gets first call
Q. Hello! My husband and I have been in a disagreement lately. he plays games on his computer all evening and then waits until after 10pm when I want to go to sleep to come to bed and ask for sex. I have told him multiple times that if he would come to ...
A. 17 October 2016: You have compromised enough. He is choosing a silly game over being intimate with you. I am sorry that he is neglecting you over a game. I really don't know what you can do other than talking to him about how he is making you feel. ... (read in full...)
Swears she isn't cheating but...
Q. So I have been with this girl for a year and a half, and I actually moved into her house with her parents. We met through online gaming actually and lived close enough to where we decided to get together and inevitably move in. So the first few ...
A. 17 October 2016: You treat her like crap so it would not surprise me if she went running to someone else. Is it right? No it is not. But I agree with her when it comes to her phone. She is entitled to her own privacy, you are not entitled to snoop through her phone. ... (read in full...)
Slow progress with this guy I like
Q. Why do I get asked out by guys who are married or who are similar to the losers who made my life miserable before. I am a 53 year old woman with grown children and one still at home. Never been married. I am very independent with my own houses. ...
A. 17 October 2016: Is this the same guy from the gym? If it is then really you need to let him go. I believe you are attractive and he does flirt with you. But to me it is part off his job and you are beginning to sound clingy and needy.... (read in full...)
I'm bi-curious and want to experiment with my friend
Q. straight, with some bi-curious. I want to experiment with my best friend, but I don't know how to approach it, like how he will handle it. I think he is curious as well, but I don't know. I don't want to ask him, and have him say no, but I want to ...
A. 17 October 2016: I wouldn't come straight out with it and tell your friend you want to experiment with him because it might just freak him out.
Put it in to a conversation in general. Ask him would he go to a gay club. Also you can say to him you are inte... (read in full...)
Is it wrong of me to be upset with the way my boyfriend treated me?
Q. Hello, I would like to seek your opinion on the following situation and please let me know if I over reacted. My plane had just landed home from a trip to visit my boyfriend. We had a wonderful visit and he couldn't bear to see me leave. We had plan...
A. 17 October 2016: You took this way to far. He told you he was out having a drink with a friend, so at that point you should have left him to it and said you would have texted him when you landed home safe. Instead you insisted on keeping in contact with him and ... (read in full...)
Is he living out a porn fantasy?
Q. I'm recently divorced. My ex-husband was my first and only partner until now. Our sex life was always kind of vanilla to tell the truth and his sexual drive was never equal to mine. Anyway, I'm dating a younger man (he's 27). We just started having ...
A. 17 October 2016: My guess is that he enjoys doing this. Everyone has there own pleasures or fetishes and well I guess this is just the way he likes to finish off. Maybe he was in a relationship before you where they did not use condoms and wanted to avoid pregnancy ... (read in full...)
I can't approach him andask if he wants me as bad as I want him...
Q. Hi agony aunts. I feel like I'm getting mixed signals from this guy and i dont know what to think or do. I'll list the things he does just to make it clearer: -always really flirtatious, compliments me etc -genuinely laughs when we talk, like not o...
A. 17 October 2016: What age is this guy? Am curious if he is the same age as you or older. Has he more experience than you?
At the end of the day if you are going to sit on the fence then you are never going to know the answer. He tried to kiss you and you did not ... (read in full...)
I am worried about my the narcissist my sister is dating!
Q. He had an affair with my sister and he left his wife of nearly 30 years. His wife says he is very narcissistic and will destroy and cheat on her eventually!? Is she right. I can't see it he is very loving and careing towards my sister and teats her ...
A. 17 October 2016: Off course is wife is going to be bitter, he left her for your sister. So she is going to want to make sure you know all the bad points.
However reading your post it does sound like he is a very selfish person. Your poor nephew moved out off his ... (read in full...)
I still love him, will breaking up teach him a lesson?
Q. I just broke up with my boyfriend of almost one year. I am 23 years old and he is 28. When we met he told me that I am the one and quickly introduced me to his family and he met mine. The problem in my situation is that I come from a culture wh...
A. 17 October 2016: You both have different cultures. I understand you want that security. But in his culture it might seem rushed getting engaged after only a year, that on top off him getting pressure from your dad is making him not want to get engaged. I can see ... (read in full...)
I need help making decisions to benefit my children and shape my future
Q. Hi all, I am from India. I got married to a rich and educated girl. Initially, she was good and our relationship went well. After our first baby (son) she refused for sex. Her mother asked her to go for second baby. So she compelled me for the ...
A. 17 October 2016: Hire a nanny. Get a divorcee. Split all money and belongings in half between you both. Don't marry an infertile woman just so you can have free childcare. Maybe your parents can help in your situation? I am sorry she left you because you lost your ... (read in full...)
I've agreed to be friends, but he is pulling away from me.
Q. So, there is this guy i used to deal with but now we are supposed to be friends. He has been begging me for friendship for the longest once we established that our relationship couldn't go any further due to our military rankings. Initially,, i was ...
A. 17 October 2016: He is a guy and he probably isn't as good as expressing his feelings as you are. Look you are not friends, you never where friends. You where lovers. It does not just go from that to being friends. He wants more but obviously he knows it is not ... (read in full...)
How do I make my cousin love me back?
Q. Hey guys and girls im 14 year old and im 9th grade i love my girl cousin and she lives in another country so only 3 times i saw her 2006 2011 2016 so this year i loved her so much and we had really really good times but she went to her country back ...
A. 17 October 2016: That is a good thing, now you stop texting her. ... (read in full...)
I am unbelievably shy and it's impacting on my social life!
Q. I really need advice... I am unbelievably shy and it's impacting on my social life. I am pretty confident at work where I interact with parents and staff in my school. My friends suggested I go on dating sites as I was low about not meeting a...
A. 14 October 2016: Sweetie I don't think online dating is for you. You don't have the confidence to go and meet someone, you back out because you are scared, my guess is that you are scared you are going to let that person down in "real life". You need to gain more ... (read in full...)
I've never been catcalled and don't know how to feel about this!
Q. Hello, I am a cute (ish) woman of 29, and I have an awesome boyfriend loving and sexy and caring etc etc. I'm not unattractive, I promise. I'd give myself a solid 7.5 out of 10. Not overweight or acne scarred, and described by friends as petite w...
A. 14 October 2016: Why does it matter at your age? So nobody has ever wolf whistled at you, so what? Nobody likes this kind off attention, well most don't anyway, I know for me it is extremely embarrassing and makes me feel very awkward. Plus you sound like looks are ... (read in full...)
Our wish to adopt a child has provoked some negative reactions, how do we deal with them?
Q. My husband and I have decided to adopt. I was surprised by the negative reaction of some of our friends! I was prepared for the usual fears and prejudices (it's not your flesh and blood, you can never love him the way you would your own etc.) b...
A. 14 October 2016: I think the are judging the situation as a whole. I think between them they feel you are not ready as a couple for this challenge, I think that they are worried that you are taking on to much and it will take over your life.
Off course that is not ... (read in full...)
Do I ask how my former student is doing? I don't want to overstep any boundaries!
Q. Thank you in advance for all that take the time to give their advice. Not a relationship question however I really would like some opinions. Last year I worked briefly with a student during their last year at school. That same student lived directly ...
A. 14 October 2016: Your have a good heart and a very kind person. I think you should visit the family and ask them is there anything that they need while dealing with this. Maybe bring something that they could bring to the hospital for you. Tell them if he is up for ... (read in full...)
Why would my friend lie and say he didn't know my girlfriend?
Q. Andre [32,M] has been my best friend for almost 15 years, we lived together at Arizona, we live together now(only temporarily though). The reason I say temporarily because I have been dating this girl [31,F] for a year now, and we have been tal...
A. 14 October 2016: It is funny how Andre is judgmental off girls you see in case they are after your money and she left him because she did not think he would make much money. Maybe he new this reason and it hurt him and it has never left him so he has a guard up now ... (read in full...)
Is it bro 'code?
Q. I recently moved to a new area, and I've met a lot of people in the time I've been here. At the very beginning I was swept off my feet by a guy, but ultimately it was just a fling. While that "relationship" was fading, I met a man who happens to ...
A. 14 October 2016: If you have the right contact number then I would assume he is not interested in you romantically. Maybe you came on to strong? Or maybe he is not interested because you where just with his friend who still appears to like you. ... (read in full...)
Is this relationship worth holding onto?
Q. my girl and I were separated but still living together with a baby. I found out she was talking to someone else, she said she never slept with him but did make out with him and came home with a hickey one day. everything is in the open now and she ...
A. 14 October 2016: It is worth holding on to if you can both work passed the break up and concentrate on the future, the question is do you still love her? Do you still want to be with her?... (read in full...)
Should I pursue my options or wait it out until I wouldn't feel guilty?
Q. I just broke up with my long distance boyfriend of 3 years. We are seniors in college and heading in different directions. I still love him but I just think if we continue to ignore issues and try to force it to work, we will get even more hurt in ...
A. 14 October 2016: I know in your head you want to experience being with another guy, but am not sure you are ready just yet. If you are feeling guilty then maybe you should just slow things down. Have you been broken up long? I think I have read other posts from you ... (read in full...)
I didn't trust him and it has affected our relationship
Q. I need some advice.... I have been with my partner for just over 1 year but we have known each other for about 3. Generally we get on really well. We both work shifts and sometimes don't see each other for a week at a time. He is 10 years older th...
A. 14 October 2016: Him having depression is very different to you accusing him off cheating. Depression is an illness, you being insecure is not his fault. You need to deal with your past or you will never be happy in a relationship. You need to get yourself sorted ... (read in full...)
Why do older women like me so much?
Q. It's flattering, I have no problem being with an older woman if I like her, but they are unavailable. A woman I've known for a few years now, Caucasian, 36 years old, and she has had the same boyfriend since before we even met. She's always bee...
A. 13 October 2016: Maybe you are just not spending enough time with people your own age to meet girls. I mean you seem to have a lot of friends that are older, this might be the issue. Also a lot of people don't want to be in a relationship in there early twenties, ... (read in full...)
Is this the old him again
Q. I broke up with my husband two months ago we spent a month apart. We split as he had issue with favoritism towards his kids and a dislike of my eldest girl and my father. He also tried to control me. Generally his attitude stunk towards my kids and ...
A. 13 October 2016: Yeah I think it is time to move on, you obviously are not a good match. It sounds like you don't work together at all. You seem to use the children as weapons. If you both cannot accept the children as one big family then there is no point trying ... (read in full...)
I'm worried he'll disappear when he finds out I'm a virgin!
Q. I've met the guy and things are going well. We've been on dates and get on really well and I feel comfortable with him. However, recently he's asked me to stay over at his and I'm sorta afraid too :/ This is because I feel he will want to h...
A. 13 October 2016: Sweetie don't be afraid to tell him the truth. It really is nothing to be ashamed off. In fact you should be proud that you held off until you found someone you are comfortable with. Just tell him the truth before you stay over the night. If he ... (read in full...)
Should I not bother meeting him?
Q. I met a man on Facebook and we're meeting up this week.The problem is he is French and lives in Quebec. He speaks broken English from what I've gathered through text messages. English and French isn't my first launguage either but I live in Canada ...
A. 13 October 2016: I would stay well clear, there are red flags everywhere here. ... (read in full...)
Am I being unfair, insensitive or inconsiderate of my MIL?
Q. I’m at my wits end with my MIL... if it wasn’t bad enough when my partner raced down 107kms to take his mother to the hairdressers when no-one else was available for free, this next exploit beats all. Earlier this year my MIL made flight ...
A. 13 October 2016: I feel you are jealous of his mother for whatever reason. Look she is his mother, he loved her long before you and he would not be here if it wasn't for her. She seems to have brought up a kind man, fair play to her. So what if he wants to help her? ... (read in full...)
Can I ask my fast food fancy out?
Q. Is it unorthodox to ask cashier out? I frequent my favorite fast food restaurant once a week which I know isn't a healthy lifestyle. About the past few months or so, a new miss around my age has been working the drive-thru. Granted, it's usually hit ...
A. 12 October 2016: Please do let us know how you get on... (read in full...)
Why do older women like me so much?
Q. It's flattering, I have no problem being with an older woman if I like her, but they are unavailable. A woman I've known for a few years now, Caucasian, 36 years old, and she has had the same boyfriend since before we even met. She's always bee...
A. 12 October 2016: Sweetie I think it is the kind off woman that you keep company with. All in relationships yes seem to want a bit on the side. A toy boy. Maybe you are naturally flirty or very friendly and this is why you are attracting there attention. You need to ... (read in full...)
Is this the old him again
Q. I broke up with my husband two months ago we spent a month apart. We split as he had issue with favoritism towards his kids and a dislike of my eldest girl and my father. He also tried to control me. Generally his attitude stunk towards my kids and ...
A. 12 October 2016: Okay so issues with the children seems to be the big one here and probably the most common with marriages who have children with other partners. It really is something you all need to work on as a family. You should take on his children and he ... (read in full...)
My Girlfriend Turned Rude and Immoral, Should I Dump Her?
Q. When we started going out I thought she was a nice girl, she has loads of friends, is liberal, goes to rights protests and that sort of thing. Was also very happy and smiley. However I'm repulsed by her recently. For example she grew up in a bet...
A. 12 October 2016: She has a lot of hatred in her. You are right she is a mean person and she tries to belittle people. She might be well off but she wants more, she is jealous off people who have more than her so she tried to bring them down. She also takes pictures ... (read in full...)
Depression, drinking and having to go on holiday abroad
Q. I live with my parents, and i'm currently on medication for depression. when my parents have had holidays, ive been able to look after myself and have behaved. I'm seeing a pyschlogist at the moment who is helping me through my troubles. I asked he...
A. 12 October 2016: Sweetie you are an adult you do not have to do anything. I totally understand that your parents are probably worried about you, you are there daughter and you are suffering from depression so I can see why they want to look after you.
But you are ... (read in full...)
27 and still looking for the guy who wont pressure me for sex!
Q. Hi. I just ended a year long relationship with someone. One of the main issues was that we have different points of views on sex. He told me that it is very strange for someone my age (mid to late 20s) to be a virgin. I know that is true, but is it ...
A. 12 October 2016: No harm in waiting for what you believe in, yes he is probably right that very few people do wait now. But it is great that you respect yourself and are holding out for someone with the same morals. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend cant make up his mind!
Q. Me and my ex broke up about 5 months ago. A month after we broke up he went out with one of our mutual friends and of course that bothered me but I just kept telling myself if they are happy then I'm happy. A month into that relationship they broke ...
A. 12 October 2016: He is your first love so off course it is hard, but you do need to remove yourself from the situation. I am sure you both still have feelings for each other, but sometimes that is just not enough to have a relationship. The best thing you can do is ... (read in full...)
Being strung by my best friend... who has a girlfriend
Q. Hello DearCupid :) I'm struggling with being strung by my best friend. He has a very attractive girlfriend. They have been together for almost 10 years now and I have always respected him for it. He was never an option for me until we screwe...
A. 12 October 2016: Sweetie you know what you have to do, it is simple. You just need to cut all contact with him. He is a liar and a cheat. He did not care about your feelings when he would just fall off the side of the earth and he did not care about his long term ... (read in full...)
Should her locked phone be a deal breaker?
Q. Ok I've been with my woman now for a good bit over 2 years. Nov. 5th, at 9:20, will make 3 year's for us. We've put each other through a lot but the situations she's put me in are far worst than the things I did. We're moving past that. I mean I ...
A. 12 October 2016: Even though it may be her fault that you have trust issues, that does not allow you to have access to her phone, it is private. If you cannot overcome your trust issues then it might be best if you consider finishing this, as you are only making ... (read in full...)
Can I ask my fast food fancy out?
Q. Is it unorthodox to ask cashier out? I frequent my favorite fast food restaurant once a week which I know isn't a healthy lifestyle. About the past few months or so, a new miss around my age has been working the drive-thru. Granted, it's usually hit ...
A. 11 October 2016: If you don't want to make things awkward for her, then simply slip her a note and have your name and number on it. Ask her to drop you a text if she would like to meet on a date. At least with the note you are not putting her on the spot. ... (read in full...)
How do I make my cousin love me back?
Q. Hey guys and girls im 14 year old and im 9th grade i love my girl cousin and she lives in another country so only 3 times i saw her 2006 2011 2016 so this year i loved her so much and we had really really good times but she went to her country back ...
A. 5 October 2016: At 14 you should not even be thinking about marriage, legal or not it could turn out very messy. You are to young to be getting in to something like this. Treat her as a friend. Your crush will fade.... (read in full...)
How do I make my cousin love me back?
Q. Hey guys and girls im 14 year old and im 9th grade i love my girl cousin and she lives in another country so only 3 times i saw her 2006 2011 2016 so this year i loved her so much and we had really really good times but she went to her country back ...
A. 4 October 2016: You have a crush it is not love. Don't spend time alone with her, try and not contact her so much. You need to accept that she is your cousin, she is family not a potential girlfriend. Try and keep yourself busy and meet girls that are not ... (read in full...)
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