A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:Hi agony aunts. I feel like I'm getting mixed signals from this guy and i dont know what to think or do. I'll list the things he does just to make it clearer:-always really flirtatious, compliments me etc-genuinely laughs when we talk, like not one of those fake "I really don't care" laughs-when we talk he's really close to me, like our bodies will be only about five inches apart and because hes taller than me he looks down deep into my eyes and I just melt everytime. It's like in those romance films where they are talking really close and then they lean in just a bit closer and kiss (that's how close he talks to me)-he did actually lean in to kiss me once, but it wasnt the right moment so I didn't let it happen. I knew that he did want me to kiss him, but didn't know if he actually wanted to kiss *me* or just wanted a cheeky peck, if that makes sense-he goes out of his way to talk/flirt with *me* and atleast so far I haven't seen him act this way with any other girl-hes sexually flirtatious, but in a good way, because I guess I can be as well, he's not aggressive or insulting with whatever he says which makes me okay with it (especially since I do really want to have sex with him - that's if he turns out to be a good guy which I think he is - I'm still a virgin and am not about to give it up to just anyone)-when we hug he holds it for a couple seconds before parting-I've caught him staring at me when he thinks I'm not paying attention-finally and probably most importantly hes always looking for excuses to touch me, from touching my arms/shoulders and poking me to all the hugs etc. Why..?I know you're probably thinking, all signs are a go. But it's not that simple. Sometimes he's red hot and flirtatious and then others I barely get a hello out of him let alone a conversation. I'm really lost and don't know what to do. Problem is I'm not the type to just approach him and ask if he wants me as bad as I want him. What should I do??
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (17 October 2016):
 What age is this guy? Am curious if he is the same age as you or older. Has he more experience than you?
At the end of the day if you are going to sit on the fence then you are never going to know the answer. He tried to kiss you and you did not let him, so to him that is a rejection and he may never try again. So maybe now it is your turn to show him you like him.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (15 October 2016):
 I think that no, he does not want you " as bad " as you want him. Why ? Simple : because if he had wanted you that bad- by now he would have HAD you, considering that I am sure you are giving out all the " Green light ; I am game " signals.
I have to disagree with N91, whose solid common sense I generally admire, because I think this time he is just speaking... as a lazy young man who does not want to do the legwork, lol ! It's nice eh, N91, when they do all by themselves and just fall in your lap ?:)
Now, of course if the OP just wants a casual hook up and then see ya, there 's no need to be too delicate, she can just go and tell him: Yo, I want you real bad, and I doubt the boy will turn her down, unless she is the Hunchbackette of Notre Dame.
But, being that it would be her first time, and that , wisely, she wants to *give ° her virginity but not to throw it away with just anyone, and that she wants a " good guy "... well, I am not saying this boy is bad, as bad at heart, but it sounds like he is just being a typical horny teen, and a bit of a charmer and a player , one who likes to be liked, and would like to get laid - but , no interest in the OP as a person, no curiosity, no tenderness, no attempt to get to know her better and develop something other than glib, superficial flirting...
uhm, no, OP, I think that, for your first time, you should treat yourself better , and offer yourself something better- Like, someone who wants YOU real bad, no possible doubt about it ?...at the very, very least...
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (15 October 2016):
 You're infatuated and your hormones are all over the place. You don't talk about a relationship, just "wanting" each other, which is hooking up - not a good idea for losing your virginity.
He sounds like he's just a charmer who likes flirting. Is he older? Are you thinking about actually getting to know him? It sounds like he's just in it for the flirting and maybe hooking up. I think that would be very unwise.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (15 October 2016):
 You don't say but I am guessing this guy is a bit older than you. He sounds like he knows exactly how to play the flirtation game to get you hooked, which of course he has succeeded in doing.
Tread carefully. He sounds like an experienced player.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (15 October 2016):
 If you're not going to approach him then how are you ever going to know? What if he's going the mindset he's never going to approach you ?
The worst thing that can happen is he says no, then you find out he wasn't really interested in you anyway so you can move on with your life.
In a nutshell, if you don't do anything about it, nothing is going to happen.
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