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Ever since I can remember people have always fascinated me. I seemed to be very adept at solving people’s “life” problems and I never tired of the constant flow of friends asking for my help. I have always been a great listener and have a lot of patience and empathy for people and have written for advice columns in the past.
I am a Relationships Councillor and Life Coach and have a special aptitude with people. I have been active on this site for a number of years. I'm very much a positive thinker and hate being around negative people. Life is for living, it's too short to moan all the time. I'm determined, very spiritual, grounded, independent, strong willed and love life. Be careful what you water your dreams with. Water them with worry and fear and you will produce weeds that choke the life from your dream. Water them with optimism and solutions and you will cultivate success. Always be on the lookout for ways to turn a problem into an opportunity for success. Always be on the lookout for ways to nurture your dream.
If you realized just how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought. The difference between school and life? In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
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| Latest articles: REAL Love!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 July 2010: I have written this blog a few times but I thought I'd write it in an "article", that way people can always view it. To love a person, first and foremost you must KNOW them personally. Lots of teenagers say they "love" a celebrity or are "in love"...
Some tips for a happy marriage!
This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
16 October 2008: MARRIAGE - WHAT IS EXPECTED IN A MARRIAGE? Once you marry, don’t expect everything just to fall into place. Marriage is a serious commitment but it needs to be continually worked at. Too many people today go into marriage for the wrong reasons, t...
20 questions to ask someone on a date!
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
16 October 2008: So many of the younger ones on this site tend to be a bit tongue tied about what to ask their date so here are 20 things to ask someone on that first date. 1. What do you like to do when you're not working? 2. Where in the world would you most...
Why do you think marriages break up more now than in the past?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
16 October 2008: Do you remember years ago when families used to sit in at nights? They had no TV, no computer games, no telephones, no DVD's, no video recorders etc etc. They had one another! They had TIME to get to know one another, to BE with one another to ...
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We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 29 October 2007: I'm so pleased for you. Things seem to be coming on heaps and bounds for you in this new relationship. And you're right, your ex was more familiar to you and 3 years is a long time but now you've moved on and seem to have found yourself a lovely ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 18 September 2007: I'm so pleased for you. It's a true saying, when one door closes another one opens. Enjoy being in each others company and getting to know one another and who knows what might happen. Again, well done! Keep us posted.
Eve... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 16 August 2007: I'm sorry it didn't work out the way you wanted it to but at least she was honest with you and you can put closure on it now and move on. Things WILL get better, there are plenty more fish in the sea as the saying goes and with every day that ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 10 August 2007: You see, she's beginning to notice a difference in you. Continue with your Counselling, you'll come on heaps and bounds and most importantly continue to have a positive attitude towards life. Remember, YOU are in charge of your own destiny so get ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 6 August 2007: You will have times like that but hey, you'll kiss a lot of frogs before you find your princess. It may be your ex it may not be and if you're to be together then you will be. Just take one day at a time, think positive, get on with life and if ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 24 July 2007: Hey I'm so pleased for you! I would say you have a definite admirer there. She seems just as keen on you as you do on her so well done there! See? Your positive thinking has payed off for you. The world doesn't end when your ex wants to call it ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 17 July 2007: You're missing her and thinking negatively now. Just get on with things and keep a little bit of her in your heart then when December comes meet up again like you both agreed. A lot can happen between now and then but it will certainly test you ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 15 July 2007: She will be wanting the break for all of the things that you mention, she'll be wanting to test her feelings for you. I do believe in fate and think that if something's meant to be then it will be, it will find YOU so if you ARE both meant to be ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 12 July 2007: You sound far more positive and relaxed about things now. I smiled when I read your comments as you seem far more focussed on your way ahead now, I'm so please for you. Like you said, you can both live your lives with freedom of choice.
Keep ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 9 July 2007: It's not fair of her to keep on playing with your emotions, mentioning things in the past (the towel incident for example). She is more or less putting the guilt on YOU here saying she felt pressurised but that to me is an excuse. You get on with ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 9 July 2007: I am so sorry that the decision she made wasn't the one you hoped for. Things happen in our lives for a reason and maybe you two just weren't mean to be although you won't see it this way at the moment. Unfortunately we can't make someone love us ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 6 July 2007: Okay, I read over all of the posts again just to clarify things in my mind. This woman is crazy on you BUT she doesn't want to give you her all and you leave her again. In your very first post in this thread you say this - "Leaving the home has ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 4 July 2007: Here are some sites you can look at, one is to help you "Find Yourself" and the others are to help build up your confidence and self esteem.
http://www.wikihow.com/Find-Yourself
http://www.wikihow.com/Build-Self-Confidence
http://pi... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 27 June 2007: Just keep busy and keep thinking POSITIVE and the time will fly in. Under no circumstances must you get in touch with her though. If you do then anything positive that's been achieved will be undone. Let her MISS you! ;o)
Eve... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 25 June 2007: Okay, I misread your meaning of the "old days", it was a positive rather than a negative. I think you have both done exactly the right thing. NO CONTACT for 4 weeks. That will help both of you see whether or not you are right for one another. It ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 25 June 2007: Nice to hear from you again! I was reading your posts again. You seem to miss her when she's not there and enjoy keeping in touch with her, wining and dining her and meeting up but when it comes to the actual crunch of being together for too long ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 20 April 2007: Yes, she is missing you, hence the reason she wants to involve you more. Just remember and don't always be too willing, have your own opinions and your own mind and don't be so accommodating all the time and I reckon you've cracked it!
I wish you... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 10 April 2007: You have pulled back a bit and now she's chasing, simple as that! Because you've not seen her as often then she's missed you. Talking on the phone for long periods of time, although nice, can mean that you do say things you regret so you should ... (read in full...)
What can I do to spice my relationship with my boyfriend?
Q. What can I do to spice my relationship with my boyfriend? We've been together 2 years but are waiting until marriage for intercourse. Is there anything i can do to make him desire me more, or get that new exciting feel again?...
A. 9 April 2007: Well done on wanting to wait for marriage before you sleep together, it's nice to know that some couples still feel that way. I've given you a link that might help you it gives you "10 Ways to Create a More Exciting Relationship," I hope it ... (read in full...)
I wasn't invited to Easter dinner w/ my bf's family! Am I wrong to be a bit upset?
Q. After spending much time together this weekend, my bf went off to a big Easter gathering with his family, and some non-family members. I never got an invitation, and it felt like a knife to the heart. It hasn't been the Easter I hoped for! My ...
A. 9 April 2007: How long have you both been together? Have you met the family before? Do they know you at all? If you have been together for say more than 6 months then by rights, your boyfriend should have said he was bringing you along period! After all you ... (read in full...)
We get along great online, but I'm hesitant to meet her in person! What if it goes quiet?
Q. Hey, basically i've been getting to know this lass really well on the internet..sounds abit corny i know! But she's been on webcam etc...and well we have a great laugh together! She only lives like an hour away in the car or on train, and we've said ...
A. 9 April 2007: If you get on well online and have a lot in common then it stands to reason that you'll both get on just as well when you meet! I would meet her for sure, if you don't you may regret it for the rest of your life. She obviously likes you a lot and ... (read in full...)
She told me about her past fling - was she trying to be honest or what?
Q. hey guys just wanted to know! if my gf tellin me bout a fling she had in the past which was meaningless no sex btw she told me voluntarily, is this a sign of honesty so i don't find out from someone else?? it did really hurt me tho, and i am the ...
A. 9 April 2007: She obviously trusts you very much to be able to tell you intimate things about her past. She was being honest with you and she must feel comfortable with you to be able to open up to you in that way. That is a good quality to have and don't feel ... (read in full...)
What does "age of consent" actually mean?
Q. The age of consent in my state is 16. Does this mean if I'm 16 I can consent to sexual activities with someone over 18, 21, etc? All my friends and I keep arguing back and forth about the meaning of 'age of consent'....
A. 9 April 2007: The age of consent means the legal age you have to be in order to do something. Different countries have different laws. The age of consent to buy ciggarettes in the UK is 16 but it may vary in other countries and the age of consent (legal age) to ... (read in full...)
My fiancee is leaving me for my friend/boss! I am heartsick over this..what should I do?
Q. My Fiance, who is bipolar, recently - when confronted said she wants to be with my friend/boss and has embarked on a relationship with him. I had suspected before this that she was "sinking" into a depression and had also not taken her medication ...
A. 9 April 2007: She obviously fancies this other person and has been thinking about having a relationship with him for some time. She doesn't love you though, if she did she would never even think about going down the path she's going down. She seems infatuated ... (read in full...)
Torn between two lovers.......
Q. So basically, there's this boy, J, I was kinda/sorta seeing. I had a crush on him initially, and we just used to talk a lot, really freely. We went out for a few days before I decided it wouldn't work (my mother hates him) and broke it off. Even so, ...
A. 8 April 2007: You certainly didn't do the right thing giving "J" oral sex and leading him on, getting his hopes up, that was a bit cruel. No one has ever did that to him before, it was his first time so he obviously will hold a torch for you. You need to be ... (read in full...)
I've fallen hard for him but he seems to be pushing me away, what do I do?
Q. I recently moved to another state and left all my friends and old relationships ready to start over. I moved and met a guy who made me really realize that i could get over the past and be happy with him. He acted like i was his everything. He told ...
A. 8 April 2007: Maybe you're putting pressure on this guy without even realising it. You may be texting him too often or telling him how you feel about him and it might have scared him off a little, hence the reason he's backing off. Keep things light, enjoy his ... (read in full...)
Can you give me some tips on how to appear confident at this function?
Q. There is a function on tomorrow night that I badly want to go to but I am really scared as I will be going on my own which I don't really like and there is a fair chance my ex will be there. I don't know how to handle it. I figured that I n...
A. 8 April 2007: Copy and paste the FULL link of "how to feel inner confidence and radiance" (only part of it has shown up) okay?
Eve... (read in full...)
Can you give me some tips on how to appear confident at this function?
Q. There is a function on tomorrow night that I badly want to go to but I am really scared as I will be going on my own which I don't really like and there is a fair chance my ex will be there. I don't know how to handle it. I figured that I n...
A. 8 April 2007: First of all can I say well done to you girl for considering going here on your own! You are right to do this and challenge yourself. You know you can do this, in fact you can do absolutely anything you desire! You need to syche yourself up a few ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend moved in 3 months ago and our sex life is almost non existent!
Q. hi my boyfriend moved in 3 months ago and our sex life is almost non existent lucky if its once a week he watches a lot of porn on the computer what should i do we are in our late 30s ...
A. 8 April 2007: Is his porn watching just a recent thing? When men watch porn it's quicker to "get off" and the more they watch it the lazier they can become with their significant other. You need to let him know that you're concerned about this and how insecure ... (read in full...)
She sees porn cookies on the PC and is accusing me of looking at porn sites!
Q. My g/f and I have been together for 11 years and we have 2 children together,lately she has been accusing me of looking at porn on the computer. she says its found in the cookies when ever she disects the computer. I AM NOT looking at no porn and ...
A. 8 April 2007: Is it only you and her that use the PC? It couldn't be the children? As far as I am aware if a porn cookie comes up then someone must have been looking. I may be wrong though. Check for cookies yourself before you log off and see if any come up. ... (read in full...)
How can I trust him? Is he seeing someone else?
Q. i am having mixed feelings about my ex he has told me that we are working on our relationship. He knows that if he gets in a bind that i always back him up.but when it comes to his feelings he wont be open with me, if i called him to do something ...
A. 8 April 2007: How long have you both been together? It may be that he's trying to work things out in his own head and needs the space to do this. If he really does love you then he'll come back once his head is clear. What you don't want to do is pressure him ... (read in full...)
he has made comments that women have too much power, women are inferior, women can't get anything done without emotion
Q. I have been dating a man for about a year and a half. He seems to have two very distinct sides to him. When things are going well and he is happy, he is smart, sensitive, protective, re-assuring, complimentary, loving, calm, fun and funny to be ...
A. 3 April 2007: You asked... "Is there a big chance that he will physically abuse me again because he is still verbally abusing?" - YES 100%. It will NEVER work out with you and this man. The problem with him is that he doesn't even see he has a problem, that's ... (read in full...)
Although I really do appereciate that he is being himself with me, I'm not sure I want this kind of relationship.
Q. GUY TROUBLE!!!!!!!! ok so there is this guy i kinda have a little crush on, a lot of people have told me he is in love with me but i try not to follow gossips. So the problem is that the more i talk to him and the more i get to know him i realise ...
A. 3 April 2007: They say opposites attract but you're far better off with someone you have a lot in common with unless a lot of compromising happens on both sides. If you want to know for sure if he really does like you then you ask him out! See what he says, ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seems to be getting lazier and I just feel used by him.
Q. Okay, i am having a huge problem and i really need some advice on. I have been dating this guy for a little over a year, but in the past few months he has got lazy. When he is at my house or when im at his, he always says " hey babe, can you go get ...
A. 3 April 2007: You must be confiding in this other guy if he says he can't stand it any more! First of all you need to let him know you are both friends and that's it! Make that very clear to him. Secondly, next time your boyfriend asks you to get something for ... (read in full...)
We used to be such good friends but I think she's fallen for another guy and I don't know what to do?
Q. me and this girl met last summer we really started to like each other and we met a few times after and we talk every night on the phone, im not quite sure what we are and now she has started to fall for another guy and i dont know what to do...
A. 3 April 2007: You're in your thirties, you should be assertive enough to be able to ask her where you stand here. Does she live far away from you? How do you know she's falling for someone else, has she told you? Have you ever actually asked her out on a date? ... (read in full...)
When it comes to relationships, why am I so emotional?
Q. When it comes to my relationship, I am too emotional. I have a tempter, I cry...when we fight, it affects my entire life. I can't work and can't eat. I never use to be like this up until the past year or so. how did this happen...how can I change ...
A. 3 April 2007: So tell me... what's happened to you in the past year or so to make you feel this way? How long have you and your partner been together? I get the feeling you don't trust him and are very unhappy with yourself and how you look, maybe even to a ... (read in full...)
How can I trust that he won't "hook up" with someone behind my back?
Q. A couple of weeks ago, while having sex with my partner/fiance ("fiance" concept is presently up in the air), I talked about having a threesome to excite him. HE went on-line almost immediately looking for that 3rd person. Hesitant to destroy the ...
A. 3 April 2007: If I were you I would sit down with my partner and tell him you've been having a good long think about all of this. Let him know it's unnerving you and you feel very insecure about it all. Set new boundaries with him! Let him know exactly what ... (read in full...)
I'm so jealous that my bf "'cuddled up" with my friend when he was drunk! What should I do?
Q. ok i just want to know if im just being over-jealous for no reason. a friend ("andy") has told me he really likes me and wants to be with me but i think he might just be playing me because the other night a group of our friends went out but i ...
A. 2 April 2007: It all depends if you trust your boyfriend. How long have you both been together? Have you any reason not to trust him? I would give the jealousy a miss though.
Feelings such as jealousy are based on fear and do not come from love at all, we ... (read in full...)
How can I tell if this time I really am " in Love " and its not like just like before ?
Q. hi im 20. ok i know this question gets asked alot recently but im not sure what to do. I dont know whether im in love or not and i know everyone says that when ur in love "you just know", but i feel like i am now but ive felt like this in the past ...
A. 1 April 2007: If you truly love someone then you respect them for who they are, warts and all. You want to look after them and protect them, you look out for them and put them first. You feel happy and content in their company and enjoy being together. Above all ... (read in full...)
Any good tips on how I should propose to her?
Q. hi me and my gd have been together for 6 yrs and love each other very much.Ive decided to ask her to marry me. I've got the ring and everything i just don't know how to say it and at what time and where to do it. Neither of us are the type for going ...
A. 31 March 2007: Here is a link to a website entitled "50 ways to propose!" I'm sure you'll find something there to suit you. Good luck with your proposal.
http://www.india-sms.com/teen/t5.asp
Eve... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 31 March 2007: I'm glad things are going well for you but I would pull back even further. You said you have seen her 6 days out of 7. Reduce that 4 days out of 7. Let her know you have things to do but would love to see her (Wednesday). MAKE HER WANT YOU!!! ... (read in full...)
We are moving on to oral sex soon, any tips to make it good!?
Q. hi there.....me and my gf are gonna take things a step further really soon and i was just wondering how to give really great oral sex... and also shes had some before and i havent so how can i be her best ever....any tips would be extremly ...
A. 31 March 2007: Here are a couple of links to start you on your way. I'm sure you'll find them helpful. As long as you both relax and enjoy one another's bodies then everything else will fall into place. You'll know whether she's enjoying it or not by the sounds ... (read in full...)
I never seem to get it right with boys, they trample all over me and leave, will I ever find the right one!!
Q. hey i really hope you can help. well it may seem just a small problem but i really dont seem to get it right with boys they come and go, when they are forgetting me my feelings and they just trampalling all over me im just so fed up and i really ...
A. 31 March 2007: You might be looking too hard, trying too hard to get it right. Sometimes it's when we least expect it that we fall into a relationship. The main thing is that you are approachable, friendly, caring and not too loud or bolshy. If you look happy ... (read in full...)
I have started missing my ex again and thinking that we have got what it takes to work things out.
Q. I have started missing my ex again and thinking that we have got what it takes to work things out. I think it would be a waste to not work it out. Bascially I still love him, and he is not showing any signs of anything, apart from he is angry at ...
A. 31 March 2007: You need to sit down and write him a letter. Don't rabbit on and on in it about nothing, guys like the facts! Tell him you are much more grounded now and have had a long hard think about things, you can see now how you didn't give him the space he ... (read in full...)
I left my husband 5 days ago, if we sleep together is that giving in?
Q. I just seperated from my husband 5 days ago, and it's no secret that he wants me back but I know I'm not ready for that yet. I left him not just because he's an alcoholic, but because he's an alcoholic who has hurt me over and over again mentally ...
A. 31 March 2007: You are absolutely right, sleeping with him WILL make him think everything is okay. He's doing this on purpose, luring you to come over "to see the kids" but wanting you to stay. Take the kids over to him, leave them with him then call back for ... (read in full...)
My dream girl just left me and I'm dying without her.
Q. (sorry for the long text..) My dream girl just left me..and I'm dying without her I've been madly in love with this girl for my past 5 years (i'm 20 now), all throughout high-school..one year ago, we got together. I was never happier in my life...
A. 31 March 2007: I don't think you're weak Negru, I think you're sensitive and lonely. You're in another country with a different culture to your own, you befriended this woman and started seeing one another. That's why one has a relationship, to see if we are ... (read in full...)
I really love this guy but two days ago was the first time he's ever hit me and left me a mark.
Q. I am a 20 year old female that has been with a man for almost three years.In the past year we had made a family. I am so confused because i feel like he is losing interest in me and I feel like he don't love me. He's always telling me he needs ...
A. 31 March 2007: IS there something stressing him out? Has all this bickering just happened recently? How old is he? Does he belittle you (ie call you stupid) regularly? How many of a family do you have and how old are they?
Eve... (read in full...)
Is my husband cheating?
Q. Is my husband cheating? I say yes but I want you to confirm or give me a better explanation My cell phone bill included a list of calls I confronted my husband because the person text messaged claiming saying I love you he said that he d...
A. 31 March 2007: Hmmmm how long has this been going on for? Have you noticed any changes in him recently? Does he still want to make love to you as often? Does he come in late and rushes to shower? Does he still hold conversations with you or does he seem ... (read in full...)
Why do I feel so annoyed and angry?
Q. My husband has got a drinking mate who he sees occasionally. At Christmas I mentioned to him to see if him and his wife wanted to go to for a meal as a foursome as we hadn't done so for ages. The mate thought it would be a good idea and then ...
A. 31 March 2007: No one likes to be snubbed and I guess that's how you're feeling. I would leave it now and let them get on with getting pissed! They don't deserve you as a friend, god knows you've tried often enough to make arrangements with them, just look at it ... (read in full...)
I have started missing my ex again and thinking that we have got what it takes to work things out.
Q. I have started missing my ex again and thinking that we have got what it takes to work things out. I think it would be a waste to not work it out. Bascially I still love him, and he is not showing any signs of anything, apart from he is angry at ...
A. 31 March 2007: How long were you and your ex together? How old are you both? Why did you both break up? Have you heard from him at all since the break up?
Eve... (read in full...)
We get on great and are very comfy together, I love him and want to make it official, how can I tell him without scaring him off?
Q. Ive been seeing this guy for over a year and things recently have got very comfy with us, which is great. I love it a lot but, it was always a casual thing and it hasnt became official. I know he enjoys my company, as I do his and we always have a ...
A. 31 March 2007: Beeing friends with sex thrown in always complicates things. He's having his cake and eating it with you so why would he want the responsibility of a relationship too? If you choose to stay friends then NO SEX! Maybe that way he'll miss you more ... (read in full...)
When we're together it's wonderful then he stops contacting me for weeks/months at a time!
Q. Ok here goes, will make as brief as possible! Met a guy on a dating website in 2005, hit it off and arranged to meet up few weeks later although that never happened (I had other plans arranged). Kept in touch via text and emails, then he went off...
A. 31 March 2007: You know what it's like when you get burned, it's not nice and can linger for a long time. Well that's what has happened to him and he didn't like the feeling and doesn't ever want it to happen again. You need to think to yourself "what am I ... (read in full...)
How do I remove a question from here?
Q. I need to remove a question i asked as it has my name on. I very much regret writing it and if my boyfriend types my nickname into google it comes up. It would be over or make my life bery difficult. I have tried to remove myself but have failed. ...
A. 30 March 2007: If you email the boss of the site Andrew, he goes under the name of "DearCupid" then he will remove it for you permanently.... (read in full...)
We are married but have been living apart for 4 years, and no sex for 3 years, does he still love me!?
Q. I'm confused. I love my husband but I'm not sure if he loves me anymore. He prefers we live apart because he says at the moment we can't afford to live together. we have a child together but I have be like a single parent. I want a divorce but...
A. 30 March 2007: Good for you Kore, NOW you're thinking positive! You know there are always people to help you here on this site so please NEVER feel you are alone in all of this.
Stay strong!
Eve... (read in full...)
Why does he tell me he loves me one minute then 4 days later, wants nothing more to do with me???
Q. I recently split with my boyfriend of three years as he cheated on me and he begged me to take him back, i said no. He then said can we at least be friends as it would break his heart if we couldn't. Then for days later he told me he had met someone ...
A. 30 March 2007: I think he's been looking for a reaction from you, that's all! If he has met another women then he's obviously met her a while ago, especially as now they're going to move in together. He was feeling you out to see what you'd say. Maybe he hasn't ... (read in full...)
My ex says I refuse to allow him contact with our kids, and refuses to talk to me! How do I deal with him?
Q. i've been seperated from my ex for about 6 months now,we have 2 kids and we argue about everything concerning them, especialy since we slept together about 3 weeks ago. He now tells people that i refuse to allow him contact with our kids, and ...
A. 30 March 2007: You are doing the right thing but don't be his "bit on the side", he's only using you and you're agreeing to be used by sleeping with him!
Let him know he's welcome to see the kids whenever he wants to, that is his right. If he's already living w... (read in full...)
Met a guy off the internet, was it just all about the sex for him ?
Q. I met up with a guy of the net about 3 weeks ago. The chemistry between us was crazy and we ended up kissing on the first meeting. Second meeting we ended up having a one night stand, except I left in the middle of the nite because he didnt want to ...
A. 30 March 2007: Jeeeeeezus, how humiliating for you! He should never have taken you back to his flat if his flatmate wasn't going to be pleased. This was an excuse though and I'm sure you know that now. The mistake you made here was sleeping with him so quickly. ... (read in full...)
We are married but have been living apart for 4 years, and no sex for 3 years, does he still love me!?
Q. I'm confused. I love my husband but I'm not sure if he loves me anymore. He prefers we live apart because he says at the moment we can't afford to live together. we have a child together but I have be like a single parent. I want a divorce but...
A. 30 March 2007: In my last post I said... "And so what if he doesn't earn as much money as he did in Africa, as long as he earns, that's the main thing." What I meant to say was "And so what if he doesn't earn as much money in Africa as he earns in Britain, as ... (read in full...)
We are married but have been living apart for 4 years, and no sex for 3 years, does he still love me!?
Q. I'm confused. I love my husband but I'm not sure if he loves me anymore. He prefers we live apart because he says at the moment we can't afford to live together. we have a child together but I have be like a single parent. I want a divorce but...
A. 30 March 2007: I think if you dig deeper you'll see that he hasn't gone without sex for the last 3-4 years. As a christian you'll be aware where it says you can get divorced if adultery happens (Matthew 19:9) so don't worry there. It is honourable that he wants ... (read in full...)
We are married but have been living apart for 4 years, and no sex for 3 years, does he still love me!?
Q. I'm confused. I love my husband but I'm not sure if he loves me anymore. He prefers we live apart because he says at the moment we can't afford to live together. we have a child together but I have be like a single parent. I want a divorce but...
A. 30 March 2007: He is bullshitting you here. He's saying you can't afford to live together? So instead there are 2 houses. 2 sets of council tax, 2 lots of electricity bills, gas bills, phone bills etc etc. I would take the initiative here and TELL him you want ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 18 March 2007: She NOTICED you didn't reply right away! That's good! If she calls you tomorrow asking to arrange something, suggest you call her back in an hour to be sure, say you have something else you needed to attend to and don't know if you can leave it or ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 17 March 2007: Nooooo, you came across loud and clear the first time. You went for coffee, went back to her house to collect something then spoiled it lol by asking her did she want company. You poor love, I know how you are feeling, clutching at anything to ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 17 March 2007: It IS the best way, you'll see I'm right. Woman like a bit of a challenge and don't like a guy to always just "be there" when they snap their fingers, they lose their appeal. Keep in touch :o)
Eve... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 16 March 2007: She cried because she knows how much you feel for her and you calling to ask if she wanted some company only confirmed that. If I were you I wouldn't call her or text her. Let HER do the running. She really IS trying to get her head around all of ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 15 March 2007: That is why you both need to move back down a couple of gears, take things very slowly, don't see one another as often and try not to sleep together as this only messes with your head and emotions. Put some space between you to see if you actually ... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 14 March 2007: I'm glad things are working out for you and your night was a success. Yes, keep us posted and let us know how things go! Be there for her without being too "in her face" all the time and you'll be fine. I wish you both all the very best.
Eve... (read in full...)
We moved in, we moved out - now I really want things to work out but don't want to scare her away!
Q. Ouch, I am writing as a confused 32year old bloke who would value any advice. Me and my girlfriend (25) have been together for close on 3 years and I moved out of our home a month ago after just over a year of living together. We still see eachothe...
A. 12 March 2007: Here is what to do if you want to win her back. She's getting the best of both worlds just now. She has her freedom to be with her friends and she has you! You said you still see her a couple of times a week and still have a kiss and cuddle ... (read in full...)
My ex says I refuse to allow him contact with our kids, and refuses to talk to me! How do I deal with him?
Q. i've been seperated from my ex for about 6 months now,we have 2 kids and we argue about everything concerning them, especialy since we slept together about 3 weeks ago. He now tells people that i refuse to allow him contact with our kids, and ...
A. 9 February 2007: Why on earth did you end up sleeping with each other if you argue all the time? How did that come about? Did you say to him during one of your arguments that you were refusing him contact with the kids? (Truth now!)
I think you two are acting l... (read in full...)
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