A
female
age
,
AskEve
writes:I have written this blog a few times but I thought I'd write it in an "article", that way people can always view it.To love a person, first and foremost you must KNOW them personally. Lots of teenagers say they "love" a celebrity or are "in love" with them but of course this can't be, they love the idea of who they are but if they've never met them then it's just a crush or infatuation.Real love on the other hand is very different. If you truly love someone then you respect them for who they are, warts and all. You want to look after them and protect them, you look out for them and put them first. You feel happy and content in their company and enjoy being together. Above all you can be yourself when you're with them. You never try to be anything more or someone different because you don't need to. You don't have to impress them to win them over and you never have to play games to make them like you. There is trust and understanding on both sides and you feel safe and secure within yourself. You would never undermine them, they are not someone in whose company you feel threatened or small. They are someone with whom you can share your innermost thoughts and worries, a person with whom you should be able to share anything, they are your friend and your confidante and you can be honest with them at all times, you can tell them anything because they love you as you are.He/she may be someone who is the direct opposite of you. On the surface you may seem like chalk and cheese. Whilst you may be loud and forceful they may be quiet and thoughtful. You may come from different backgrounds, different countries or be twenty years apart but this doesn't matter. There is an unspoken language between you, the spiritual connection between you both is so deep that you seem to be able to communicate without even speaking to each other. You are happy to lie in silence together. You feel sometimes that there is no need to talk because you feel that you know what they are thinking anyway. You feel so close to them that sometimes you think you could almost read their mind. You know when they are worried, in pain, or sad just by looking at them. It is as though there exists some kind of telepathy between you. Real love stands the test of time, you laugh together, cry together and even have your differences but this doesn't matter, you love that person AND their failings. You come together in a crisis and work through things together and this just brings you closer. You take their feelings into consideration in all that you do. They are the most important person in your life!~Eve~
View related questions:
crush, different countries Reply to this Article
Share |
You can add your comments or thoughts to this article A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2010): I didn't fall for a celebrity, though I have always liked Leonardo Di Caprio ;-). I fell for a teenagers nearest equivalent - their teacher.
I fell in love with my man when I was still 14. It hit me like a train. This young teacher walked into my class and bang!
This love grew, unrequited for over 2 years. At that age a week is eternity, but just his name, or anything I associated with him bought me closer to him.
If you look for love, you see a reflection. Have an empty heart, a clear conscious and open mind. True love will walk across your field of vision, with this sentimental freedom you will see it for what it is. You can hold true love in your open hand, like a butterfly. If it go's and comes back it is yours for good. If it flys away it was meant to be.
I have seen friends from the same class at school, go through boyfriends like monkeys on a tree; not letting go of one branch until they get hold of the next. The tangle just seems to get more and more complex, they get further and further from where they should be. If you are that monkey, why not get down to the ground, look at the roots of the trees and chose one that is strong and fortuitous, one where you can just be?
Feel free to read my story:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/im-an-author-looking-for-your-stories-about.html
I wish to share it because, in the field of love, I am really beginning to see how fortunate I have been.
A
male
reader, Starmonster888 +, writes (19 July 2010):
 Actually, I think teenage love is real love. It's more frequent, but just as real. Consider this: a person can feel love at any age just as they can feel anger, sorrow, remourse or excitement. Love can be a long term or short term feeling, with variation depending on various things like the depletion, or total loss, of the source from which it manifested or the birth of an additional reason to pre-existing reasons for loving someone. It's a similar concept to hate, you can hate you sibling for a short period or loathe your enemy for eternity( lets not dance around the difference between dislike and hate... it's the same shit, one just SOUNDS nicer).Put quite simply, humans are fickle creatures.The thing is, we as humans love love so much, that we've decided to label it something that is rarely attainable, when really it's an emotion we display and experience on a regular basis.Also, the way I see it, love doesn't hurt you, people do. If someone cheats on you, what hurts is the betrayal, not the love. Obviously the fact that you loved that person makes that betrayal more relavant, but blaming love is still technically inaccurate.
...............................
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (18 July 2010):
AskEve is verified as being by the original poster of the question Life is all about "experiencing" and if we want to experience true love then I feel we need to take chances. I know I wouldn't have missed it for the world! Sometimes it lasts, sometimes it doesn't but it's the experience we take away with us that's special. We're meant to learn from experience but it's hard sometimes, especially when we get burned. It can make us clam up, telling ourselves we'll never go there again... Every relationship is different though and I know if I could find true love again then I would certainly go for it. It's a wonderful feeling to love and be loved back in return.The purpose of all relationships is to experience and create a sacred context within which you can express the fulness of who you are. And who you are is an experience you have before you enter a relationship, not because you did.~Eve~
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2010): I think it's a very dangerous thing to give your heart to another person because, they can indeed "break it." I have been there before, and let me tell you...I would never, ever want to exp. a pain like that every again. When I was trying to get over my ex boyfriend, I use to wake up every morning wishing there was some sort of pill I could take, so that I wouldn't feel the horrible emotional pain that I was feeling at the time...and when I say it was horrible, that is extactly what I mean. You can't put a time limit on when you will "get over" that person. With me it took time, pray and therapy..I needed all three.
...............................
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (16 July 2010):
AskEve is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for the added info Soul4Real. I know EXACTLY what love is and I am definitely NOT spiritually blind!
"Love is love whether it's between partners or family members, Eve you missed the point." - I got your point very well. Love IS love but there are different types of love as you correctly mentioned. And love CAN hurt when it's not reciprocated... (see quote below.)
"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defences, you build up a whole suit of armour, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."
To reiterate... yes, love CAN hurt when it's not reciprocated.
~Eve~
...............................
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (14 July 2010):
AskEve is verified as being by the original poster of the question"Is it possible for someone to love or be in love and still do things to hurt the other person?" - Yes unfortunately, we're ALL imperfect human beings so we can still unintentionally hurt others.
"Is it possible for a selfish person to love when they so often put they're needs and wants above the other person they claim to love and respect?" - If they genuinely loved the other person then they would put their needs first. True love is selfless and doesn't hold grudges.
I was referring in my blog to the love between partners Soul4Real. You are right when you say that we must first love ourselves before we can truly love another. It starts from within...
"Keep your heart free from hate, your mind free from worry, love simply, expect little, give much, fill your life with love, scatter sunshine, forget self, think of others, do as you would be done by. This is the TRUE way to happiness! Try it for one week and you'll be surprised.
~Eve~
...............................
A
female
reader, JustMex +, writes (14 July 2010):
 Thanks for this article. It's certainly thought provoking :)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2010): Is it possible for someone to love or be in love and still do things to hurt the other person? is it possible for a selfish person to love when they so often put they're needs and wants above the other person they claim to love and respect?
...............................
|
