Married man or emotionaly unavailable?
Q. I had been seeing a man for over a year, then he broke it off stating he was not ready for a long-term commitment. After 8 months with no contact, we recently reconciled. I suspect he may be married and have tried to ask questions to determine his ...
A. 31 December 2010: Nowadays, it's very simple to tell if someone is married with the internet and public records.
There are background checks (just google those words) that can pull up all public information like marital status, employment, all of his relative... (read in full...)
If she snitches on me I'm done for!!!
Q. I just recently broke up with a boyfriend and were still friends. Up until a couple days ago we have been hanging around each other every day all day. Then I stopped it because I still really liked him and he was pretty much using me as a booty ...
A. 30 December 2010: Okay, wait a second. You have an ex who is a jerk. He's your ex though, so what you do with anyone else isn't his business. So let's get him out of the way.
The real issue is that you knew your family friend (I'm going to call him FF for now)... (read in full...)
He cheated, I mentioned divorce and now he wants another chance
Q. Hi I am married for 11 yrs and my husband cheated.I gave him 2nd chance but he decided to leave again. After 6 months he came back and wants another chance. I told him about divorce and suddenly he wants another chance. What is yr advice???...
A. 28 December 2010: Jonas is right on the money! I was going to say that he was being dumped by the other woman! Don't let him come crawling back to you as his "backup plan". The trust is destroyed. He now has a taste for cheating, and the damage is pretty irreve... (read in full...)
Is this really an orgasm?
Q. Ok im a 18 year old female I lost my virginity at 17 going 18 bit before then I would finger myself and had my boyfriend do it also and its like my whole body gets a really great feeling like I get all warm inside my stomach clit and pussy muscles ...
A. 28 December 2010: Fishdish is right. You are close! It sounds like what you're having is the buildup, and that makes you want to cry out, sure! The next time you feel that, do not stop! Keep up the stimulation (your guy, yourself, whichever!) and you'll feel more ... (read in full...)
He says he won't do anything I don't want him to
Q. my boyfriend is 2 years older than me and loves me tells me he will not do anything i ask him not to. i can tell that eritates him though. whatt should i do?...
A. 28 December 2010: Are you talking about in the sexual sense? If so, you're absolutely in the right to tell him what you will allow and not allow. You're 13-15, and you are not ready for sex and the risks it entails. If your boyfriend gets irritated at you for not ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend called me fat and that is destroying our relationship
Q. Hi everyone. This is my situation... I've been dating this guy 'L' for almost 10 months, we've been friends for two years and I'm very in love with him. He says he loves me and I believe it because he has proven me he does love me. Our relation...
A. 27 December 2010: There are three things happening here.
1. You need to speak to a someone about your weight/bulemia self-appearance issues, or you will be a landmine for any comments, both intentional and unintentional. It's obvious that you must address ... (read in full...)
How do I tell him I'm not ready?
Q. me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 months. we are both 15. he says that i have changed his life because i make him so happy and i am amazing to him. he also makes me happy and i am in love with him. recently he fingered me, and i wasn't ...
A. 27 December 2010: You're 13-15! Of COURSE you're not ready! First though, you need to speak up for yourself. If you're too nervous around a guy to not speak up and then have a friend of yours talk to him, then you absolutely shouldn't be having sex with him or for ... (read in full...)
How much time on Facebook is "normal"
Q. this isnt really a question, its more of a wondering :) is it normal for people to spend all day everyday on facebook. two of my best friends do it and i dont no any other people who do that but is it normal? thanks btw :)...
A. 27 December 2010: I think that "normal" is relative to each individual person. If they're keeping their life in balance with work, family, friends, and Facebook, then that's healthy.
However, if Facebook is consuming their lives, or they cry for hours because ... (read in full...)
He cannot take care of me like he wants
Q. I started dating a gentleman 17 years older then me. He seems to not be able to get hard. He has tried a number of medications to help and they do not. We have sex and it is really good sex, but he gets so upset because he can not "take care of me" ...
A. 27 December 2010: If this *is* truly all about his being upset by not taking care of you, he should know that his penis is not the end-all be-all of sex for you! He could make you scream with his hands, tongue, toys, anything! Not to mention - he could really make ... (read in full...)
It just disgusts, saddens, and makes me depressed everytime I think about my girlfriend's past
Q. So this is kind of a interesting situation. My girlfriend is 16 years old, and I am 18 years old. We have been in a steady relationship for about a year now. I have been having problems getting over her past. At one time, she got mixed into the w...
A. 27 December 2010: Abella's onto something here. It's also interesting to me that when you met her, she was a mess, and her past didn't disgust you then. You only started really having the problem AFTER she gave up that life and is now living upright and clean.
... (read in full...)
Depressed and Panicked... 32 yr old single female.. is there any chance for me?
Q. I feel so truly depressed.. after making some bad decisions over the last 3 years, in terms of relationships. I've ended up single... i will turn 32 in 2011 and its causing me serious stress and depression. People keep telling me i'll meet someon...
A. 27 December 2010: Oh geeze. 32 is young! I think you're fixed on your ex and your feelings of abandonment and rejection, and they're making you feel old, unwanted, and unworthy of love.
You live in a big city besides! That's like single person nirvana! Do you h... (read in full...)
Boyfriend saved my life and is now handicapped. Should I stay with him?
Q. I'm 20 and my boyfriend is 24. He is the best thing that's ever happened to me. It almost sounds unreal, but he saved my life about one month ago. He pushed me out of the way from getting hit by an oncoming car, but he was badly injured. Right now, ...
A. 26 December 2010: Here is the thing. First, you're only a month out of your accident. He is in physical therapy, but he's moving forward. It can take anywhere from 2-4 months for a simple broken bone to heal, depending on where it is. I think you're being ... (read in full...)
I think I'm a lesbian but won't be accepted by my peers
Q. I'm a 22 year old and I think I'm a lesbian. I never had any type of.dealings with.a female but this is something that is constantly on my mind. It's to the point where I sometimes watch lesbian porno wishing it was me. But I'm afraid I won't be ...
A. 25 December 2010: Never let what people think about you ever stop you from exploring your own sexuality. I wouldn't get too hung up on your label. The real issue here is who you're feeling oriented towards. If you feel that you're more wired to loving women, then ... (read in full...)
I suffer my uninterested husband, I want more romance in my life
Q. i have been married for almost 30 years. my husband never, never , never initiate romance, sex or anything. he never makes me feel special. he never takes me away or really talks to me . mind you, we do go places and do things, but only if and IF, i ...
A. 24 December 2010: Guys aren't mind readers. Sometimes, the best way to get what you want is to just tell him. A lot of times, when we feel that our needs aren't met, instead of clearly stating what's wrong, we take it out in other areas hoping that the guy will get ... (read in full...)
My husband of 14 years had an affair with a stripper 4 months ago. How do I forgive him?
Q. My husband of 14 years had an affair with a stripper 4 months ago. I just found about it 2 months ago. He paid her $200.00 for sex in a motel room. (Isn't that protitution?) I also found recepits where he bought her jewelry three different times. ...
A. 23 December 2010: I don't think I could forgive him, nor would I want to. You do not *have* to forgive him. Even in Christianity where it's frowned upon to divorce in many social circles, infidelity is the huge exception to that rule. There is absolutely no stigma ... (read in full...)
Should my husband allow this woman to come back and work for him?
Q. I believe a woman sends my husband inappropriate emails - baiting him... She works with him seasonal 2 months of the year. He can make it so that they will not work together and I am wondering if it is wrong that I would suggest that if she works ...
A. 23 December 2010: I agree with Walkin'. The issue here isn't this woman. If your husband hadn't been unfaithful, this woman would be insignificant. This crisis could be stopped cold by your husband by his just telling her not to email him, that he's married and ... (read in full...)
Why did she lie to me when she had actually moved in with another guy?
Q. Why is it that the good guy ends up the jackass? My gf broke up with me telling me she loved me but was overlaod with work, her son so on and so on. I am such a sucker. My best bud sister is her friend and everyone's talking behind my back about how ...
A. 23 December 2010: So stop me if I'm wrong. What you want to do is hurt a whole bunch of girls, turn THEM callous towards guys and become a major loser because some girl lied to you? So now you're indicting our entire gender because your heart was broken?
Maybe... (read in full...)
Jealous girlfriend , my fault I hit her ?
Q. My girlfriend is bi polar and jealous. She caught me with porn and got really mad about it she wol't let me have female friend and I don't care about that because I don't want her to have male friends so we made a deal no friends of oppisite sexes. ...
A. 23 December 2010: You have the nerve to say that SHE's bipolar, but you're in here bragging about how you "beat the shit" out of her while your own aunt and uncle pulled you off of her??
Sorry, but you need to be locked up. How dare you lay a finger on her? Sh... (read in full...)
My boy friend's asking for closure
Q. My boyfriend just broke up with me two days ago and now he wants to meet to "answer any questions we have about us or any clarification." why? What does this mean??...
A. 23 December 2010: Why did he break up with you in the first place???
That email sounds a bit neurotic if he was the one who broke up with you in the first place!... (read in full...)
My boy friend's asking for closure
Q. My boyfriend just broke up with me two days ago and now he wants to meet to "answer any questions we have about us or any clarification." why? What does this mean??...
A. 23 December 2010: I'm with shawncaff. Sounds like adding insult to injurt if he broke up with you in the first place. Seems like he should have told you why he broke up with you in the initial "breaking up" period.
I'd tell him "thanks but no thanks" and cons... (read in full...)
He has herpes...Did he cheat???
Q. I am asking for help on here because I don't want to tell my friends about this. My fiance was just diagnosed with herpes. I have been with my him for 5 years. We got engaged a year ago. He goes to school 100 miles away and comes home on ...
A. 22 December 2010: It's quite possible that he hasn't cheated. Herpes can be latent for years before presenting symptoms. If you'd been with him for 25 years, I would have said that there was a better chance that he had cheated, but 5 years, and it could have been ... (read in full...)
I need my wife to show me that she loves me, I can't do it all alone!
Q. Well I have been married to my wife for a little less than a year now and we can't seem to get along, we constantly argue and can't have a decent conversation with having it turn into a huge argument later. We had been a couple for 7years before ...
A. 22 December 2010: Hmmm, if you're both working 48-60 hours a week, you've gotta be making some decent money. Why the hell don't you hire outside help for some of the chores? It's not like she's sitting at home eating bon bons! Get a housekeeper in once a week and ... (read in full...)
Fifty and Fabulous? Throwing in the towel..
Q. I really do have bad luck with men. Unlike other women who posted here, I do make good choices and always take care of myself. Dating married men has never been an option. In fact, I am very careful about who I date because I have a son who's 13. ...
A. 22 December 2010: Ooh! Question? Have you ever been set up on a date by any of your friends? For some reason, many of MY friends have gotten married and fallen head over heels based on having "matchmaker" friends. This has the advantage of being someone known ... (read in full...)
Was it right for me to worry about this 15 year old girl my ex is dating?
Q. ohhhhh kayyyyy. So my ex boyfriend said i cant talk to his ex girlfriend and all i told her was the truth. He cheated on me. We live in same town. This girlfriend hes now seeing again live in a different state and shes fifteen. Hes twenty. Was this ...
A. 22 December 2010: OMG. You're worried about HER??? The only thing you should be worried about her about is that she's being statutory raped by a 20 year old!
Your ex is committing a felony! 18 is the age of consent. Have you not seen Dateline? This child is... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has a secret dating profile
Q. Recently, I was randomly googling people I know out of intense boredom. I googled my boyfriend and I found his dating profile on some sleazy site. His pictures consisted of inappropriate shots of him that he had sent to me when we were forced to be ...
A. 22 December 2010: I actually don't think there are any questions that you need to ask your boyfriend. Why ask him things that he'll make up lies about and beat around the bush making up an explanation?
This one is simple. If he's telling you that you're the only... (read in full...)
I traveled 30,000 miles to get back to a boyfriend who broke off with me!
Q. I travelled 30,000 odd miles home 2 days ago to be told as soon as I got off the plane I no longer had a boyfriend - the boyfriend I was so desperate to get home to. The boyfriend I thought about the whole time I was away. The first 2 weeks it was ...
A. 22 December 2010: You're not worthless. Don't take the hit for his extreme immaturity. He could have told you before you left.
I'm thinking there's more to this story than we're hearing now. "Work and stuff" sounds a lot like he cheated on you while you were gon... (read in full...)
I have feelings for my dead best friends husband
Q. I think i may be in love/lust with my dead best friends husband. This is not the first time something like this has happened to me. When i was 18 i was engaged to "Matt" he was killed in a car wreck 3 months before we where to get married. ...
A. 22 December 2010: Well, to put it romanticly, your best friend's widower is 100% available, so there is no moral reason why you can't pursue things with him. It would make sense actually, but there HAS to be more than both you and her husband grieving for her and ... (read in full...)
Do I go for my millionaire boss or the lazy guy?
Q. ok i am VERY confused! my feelings are all over the place and i dont know what to do! i am 19 years old and a virgin and i have only had one boyfriend during high school but it wasnt serious at all...i dont like to say it but the thing is i am ve...
A. 22 December 2010: Well, I will say this - your guy who is 25-26 and in his last year at University isn't lazy if he's been putting himself through graduate school!
As for your 29 year old boss, is he available, or is he married? What makes you scared of him?? T... (read in full...)
Unemployed and yet my wife is asking for petty cash!
Q. I am currently unemployed, while paying for a large 5 bedroom home and all related expenses for my spouse and 2 children to live comfortably. My spouse continues to ask me for petty cash that she expresses is needed because of her over spending or ...
A. 21 December 2010: Heh..did you used to own a business? It's not often I see the words "petty cash" being used in the context of a domestic setting. Nothing wrong with it, but it sounds like to me that you used to own your own business that took the economic hit ... (read in full...)
Why does my ex want to be my friend after what he did to me?
Q. Why is my ex hellbent on being my friend when he put me through the ringer? I hate his guts and he's dead to me! ...
A. 21 December 2010: He sounds a bit obsessive. He threw you away, but in a weird way, he wants no one else to have you either. It's also an ego thing to have the need to be on good terms with exes, not to mention it's a sort of hedging his bets as well.
If you're n... (read in full...)
He thinks I lost my virginity, but I feel I didnt! Who is right here?
Q. Something Strange Happened to me... i had no deep experience in sex but i knew a lot of information from my friends, one week ago i was with my boyfriend and he tried to penetrate i feel pain so he stop a little bit and repeat after that he enter...
A. 21 December 2010: You did lose your virginity. Penetration, however slight, is enough to end your virgin status. ... (read in full...)
Why does he have cold feet?
Q. My boyfriend and I been dating 3yrs living together for 2yrs. When we got involved with was both separated from our spouses for over a year with the intend of getting a divorce from our spouses. Well my divorce was finalized this year he has put ...
A. 20 December 2010: It's possible that he might be attached to her, but it's more probable that he's looking out for his financial interests. A divorce also involves spousal support, child support, the dividing of assets and the impact on his kids if he has any. ... (read in full...)
He apologized but still wants to be apart.
Q. Hi every one.First thing, I am sorry for my english. I am learning, but I will try to explain what's going on. I am married for 3 years, my husband left me because he said that he doesn't have future with me. He wants to move out of the country ...
A. 20 December 2010: All you can do here is not continue the relationship. Don't talk to him every day, file for divorce and let him go. He doesn't have faith in you to help build your future together, and you need to find someone like that.... (read in full...)
It bothers me that he was once engaged to someone else!
Q. This is a fairly simple question. I've been with my boyfriend for about 5 months and I love him. He is older than me and 5 years ago he was engaged. They ended up not getting married because she wasn't ready to give up her life of partying, as he ...
A. 20 December 2010: I was engaged twice. Once, it was to a guy who turned out to NOT be a good catch whatsoever. The second time, it was to the man I eventually married.
That's actually a really good quality in your man to recognize that he shouldn't get married ... (read in full...)
Are there clues to find guys who prefer small boobs?
Q. How can I find guys who prefer small boobs over big boobs? I have small boobs, and I'm tired of always finding guys who prefer and like big boobs better, but who "don't mind" small ones. Yeah, I know I'm insecure, but I can't help it, and I always ...
A. 20 December 2010: Well, you could start by finding a guy who would never refer to boobs as a "big rack" and makes a woman's boobs the most intelligent topic he has with another person.
Umm...don't even think about making boob size a first date question. Can you ... (read in full...)
If I tell her, i'd break her heart.
Q. Me and my girlfriend have been going out close to a year now. When i first met her she seemed to be wonderful and so motivated! Always on top of things and busy etc. Well she made me so happy and basically made my head spin just being around her. I ...
A. 20 December 2010: Actually, if you tell her you want to break up, sure it'll hurt her, but it will eventually set her free, and it's a lot better and more honorable than you cheating on her and devastating her.
Just be really gentle when you do it, but leave no... (read in full...)
Keeps pictures of his ex on his computer.
Q. why does my boyfriend keep pictures of his ex on his computer and a picture of both of them together as his desktop screensaver? Why does he say that he has a lot of love for her but he loves me.He has been with me for almost a year now. Any advice...
A. 20 December 2010: Wow. Well, having her pictures as part of a ton of saved pictures on a computer is one thing (unless they're nudes!!!). But having her on as a screensaver and saying he still has a "lot of love" for her?? This guy is an affair waiting to happen. ... (read in full...)
Is it alright to go out with married co workers ourside of work??
Q. Hello: Is it un appropriate to go out with the married co workers of the opposite sex after work?? What if they come to parties without their spouses and like you as a person to hang with..is that not good??? I realize a lot of marriages are not ...
A. 20 December 2010: Well, I'd say that you should ask yourself how you'd feel if your spouse did the exact same thing in the same situation instead of you.
I know that all marriages are different and have different mutually agreed upon boundaries. I can tell you... (read in full...)
Boyfriend caught wanking at work?
Q. hi my name is sally :( my boyfriend (today ex) and i had an open very sexual relationshipd, we watched porn together often, until i found him doing it alone and found out he was doing it at work and even got caught wanking ? when i have conftonte...
A. 18 December 2010: This really has nothing to do with you. You are still attractive. What he has is an all-consuming porn addiction. ... (read in full...)
My Privacy Rights vs. My Spouse's Right to Express Themselves
Q. My spouse has a blog where they routinely express themselves on it. I, by contrast, am very selective as to who knows what about my life and whatever I am / we are going through. I have told my spouse about my need for privacy, and while she ...
A. 18 December 2010: CaringGuy is absolutely right. It *is* a major deal to you. I'm also a private person who would be mortified beyond belief if my husband was spilling the intricate details of my life onto the very public internet. Who knows who might be searching ... (read in full...)
Is it really wrong to be in love with my best friend's ex?
Q. I am 27 year old female and I am in love with my best friends ex boyfriend. They had only been with each other for a year or less. My friend is very mean to him all the time and says if she stayed with him she would continue to cheat consistently on ...
A. 18 December 2010: I would talk to your best friend first and ask her if she would be okay with you dating her ex. A lot of factors could be at play here. Did they just break up? Is it possible that she's putting him down constantly because she's not yet over him? ... (read in full...)
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