I want more but I don't want to risk our friendship
Q. So i asked this girl out about a week ago. She said no but we still talk and hang out and stuff so we're still cool. But i cant get her out of my head. I mean im always thinking about her because i really do love her. I want to try and show her that ...
A. 26 November 2010: First, I totally understand how you feel. You're right - chasing her hard and heavy will jeopardise your relationship and possibly your friendship.
Second, the approach you take now pretty much hinges on why she said no. Does she already ... (read in full...)
B/f only wants me for sex now!
Q. my live in boyfriend of 5 years has moved me out and only wants me for sex for the last year. any way i can get him back...
A. 25 November 2010: He moved YOU out and now only wants you for sex? Why would you want him back? Why wouldn't you want someone who will cherish you body AND soul? If you fixate on this guy, you'll shut out any other possibilities!... (read in full...)
I Shut The Door and Now I Want to Re open It
Q. About two years ago, I was talking to this girl and we would talk everyday for about 6 months. One day I received a text from her telling me she wanted more out of us and intitially I agreed, however after five days I thought it was wrong and told ...
A. 25 November 2010: Well, the easy answer would be to just have a talk with her and tell her how you feel now. However, what's missing from what you wrote is - why weren't you ready two years ago, and what weren't you ready for?
You weren't ready for a relation... (read in full...)
Caught boyfriend making out with best friend!
Q. I caught my bf making out with my best friend last week. He swears she made the 1st move and wants me to forgive him. He was my 1st bf and my 1st kiss and so on... Wat should I do?...
A. 25 November 2010: Okay, let's say he was right, and your best friend did in fact make the first move on him. Is he saying that he's incapable of a very firm "STOP!"? It wasn't like you saw the beginnings of a kiss. You saw them making out. That means the kiss had ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's ex wife is still the center of his and his family's life!
Q. My boyfriend's ex-wife is still in the centre of his and his family's life and I dont like it ... When we met he already had a holiday book with her and the children as they were both single and good friends. I was OK about it as I thought friend...
A. 24 November 2010: I'm with JMT. You'll lose him if you do this. You have to understand that no matter that you see this friendly closeness and respect his ex has in their family as the mother of his children, she is his ex for a reason.
Whenever there is a divorc... (read in full...)
We dated once but now he's awkward around me!
Q. Okay so here is the deal, I am 17 and it all started about last march. I went on a trip with a club in my school for a week to another state. A guy in the club and I clicked right away and we hung out the whole trip. when we came home we proceeded ...
A. 24 November 2010: There's usually only one reason why a guy is normal before you go out of town for a week and then acts awkward when you return. Add the fact that he's young, immature, and there's a crazy ex out there.
He has cheated on you.
Of course, he... (read in full...)
I want to sow my wild oats!
Q. I want to sow my wild oats. The problem is I am in a LDR and he doesn't know it. we never met. he is a great guy and I don't want to hurt his feelings so I need a good excuse to dump him for not apparent reason and no I can't be honest because that ...
A. 22 November 2010: Ahh, I must have misread this one. I thought that her in-person boyfriend didn't know about her LDR relationship with another man.
In that case, I take back what I said about the breaking up in person thing. Everything else stands, though I... (read in full...)
I think my boyfriend is a just "now" boyfriend and not a "later" boyfriend
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for about four months now. We started having sex about two months ago. The sex just isn't good. It has gradually gotten better but it's still not where it should be. I don't think it's him, I think it's me. I'm just not ...
A. 22 November 2010: Well, first of all, your boyfriend actually sounds like a keeper! He's ambition, he's independent, and he's got an excellent personality!
You two are just going in different directions. If he's the same age you are, he's doing the right thing wi... (read in full...)
I want to sow my wild oats!
Q. I want to sow my wild oats. The problem is I am in a LDR and he doesn't know it. we never met. he is a great guy and I don't want to hurt his feelings so I need a good excuse to dump him for not apparent reason and no I can't be honest because that ...
A. 22 November 2010: You do not need a reason for breaking up with the guy except to tell him that you're interested in playing the field and seeing other people. Trying to come up with an excuse (i.e. provoking a fight, lying, or accusing him of infidelity) is ... (read in full...)
I kissed a guy when I was drunk, told my boyfriend and now I don't know what to do!
Q. As background, my boyfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years and were quite happy together. We were near engagement, so it's a very serious relationship. I went to a going away party this weekend and got blackout drunk at the end of the ...
A. 22 November 2010: First, no name calling here. I am sure you are harder on yourself right now than any of us can be on you.
Secondly, and this is really big. Drinking doesn't turn people into something they're not. Drinking removes the inhibitions in us, reve... (read in full...)
He uses me because he knows I like him. Is that abuse?
Q. Would you class this as abuse? A guy who only seems to talk to you when he wants sex. Who pretends he cares and likes you then once you've had sex he says you have to leave early in the morning because he's busy. You text him and he ignores it th...
A. 21 November 2010: No, this does not classify as abuse. He is using you, but you are a willing participant. He can't use you and make you feel the way you do without your permission. You know he has a girlfriend. You know that his character is morally ... (read in full...)
What do I do if another girl is in love with my guy?
Q. What do I do if another girl is in love with my boyfriend? They first became friends through class, but I know she likes him and he knows it too. He said he has no feelings for her and only sees her in class, but she texts him constantly and I am ...
A. 21 November 2010: I disagree with the notion that there isn't much you can do about this. The thing about this here is that your boyfriend knows that this other girl has feelings for him and texts him constantly. She wouldn't keep it up if he wasn't answering her ... (read in full...)
Do most people have sex on their wedding night?
Q. Hey everyone.. Well, I've never asked a question on this site before so please bear with me. I'm getting married in about 3 weeks and I just happen to still be a virgin. Even though my fiance and I have talked about our honeymoon, I've really just...
A. 21 November 2010: Most people (especially virgins) do consummate their marriage on their wedding night. You usually find a lack of urgency on the part of people who have lived together for years before they get married.
A couple of tips - You might want to consi... (read in full...)
My choices are a cheater, or a man who doesn't love me!
Q. i have known my boyfriend for 5 or more years but we just recently sarted dating and just found out he cheated on me but i anm in love with another man that doesnt want a relationship. i love my boyfriendbut what do i do....
A. 21 November 2010: There's a much more obvious option, and that's to drop both of them and find someone else entirely. That way, you're not deciding between a rock and a hard place. Those two people you're talking about aren't the only two guys left in the world you ... (read in full...)
Choices!
Q. so me and this guy was dating for almost 2 years and i really fell for him but things just started going bad about 4 months ago. we broke up and i had sex with a guy i like also and felt sort of bad about it. well my ex started talking to another ...
A. 20 November 2010: You both sound like you need some growing up, sorry to say. You break up with him and immediately have sex with someone else? That's risky beyond risky! And your ex sounds like a complete fruit loop.
You should stop thinking about this boy... (read in full...)
How to get rid of lovebites/hickeys and how to cover them?
Q. just a few questions about lovebites/hickeys really. 1- What's the best way to cover them? 2- And how long do they usually last? Any help would be appreciated. So far i've tried to cover them with concealer but it's too dark to cover ...
A. 20 November 2010: Love bites and hickeys are actually bruises to the skin. They fade about the same time as any minor bruise - about a week or so. Tennisstar is correct - turtlenecks in winter or long necked sweaters are your savior here.
There's not much you... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend keeping his options open I'm worried?
Q. I have been dating a guy just over 2 months now, We met through online dating and met up with each others 4 times now. He lives 1 hour 30 mins away from me and have not had any exclusive conversation. We seemed to be getting along well and we were ...
A. 20 November 2010: Yep, you're not exclusive yet. Many people date several people at the same time until the relationship gets to a point of seriousness. Usually then, there's the conversation about being exclusive, but until then, he's dating more than one at the ... (read in full...)
I found a letter from his ex-girlfriend what should I do?
Q. ok me and my bf have been together for six months and we have liked each other for five years i cleaned his room today and found a letter in his dresser from his ex gf it was in the open so he must know its there what should i do? ...
A. 20 November 2010: First of all, why were you cleaning his room? I'm assuming that since you called it "his" room, then it isn't yours?
And, how can a letter be out in the open yet inside a drawer? Did you come across it putting his socks away, see a letter a... (read in full...)
Where is the best place to look for a "decent" guy?
Q. Hi guys I would like some advice please. Every guy I am interested in, sadly has a colorful past. Way too much for my taste. I have tried different environents even at church! And those men still have secrets that you can't imagine! Anyway, I ...
A. 20 November 2010: Well, you could look at a Star Trek convention! :D
Heh...just kidding. I'm a Trekkie myself and proud of it! They just get the 40 yr old virgin stereotype going on, and I personally think that Patrick Stewart is a major hottie!
Seriously tho... (read in full...)
My boyfriend does not celebrate X-Mas and I'm hurt by his apparent disregard to my my feelings
Q. Me and my boyfriend are on the verge of breaking up over this.. He doesn't celebrate xmas, he's not from the UK, but he knows how important it is for my family to be around each other at that time, and this year has been one hell of a difficul...
A. 20 November 2010: So he's gone with you to your family's Christmas gatherings in the past, but this time, he's refusing because he "doesn't feel comfortable".
Sounds like he's looking to break up with you, but he's wanting you do be the one to do it. You can'... (read in full...)
I'm worried he has told other people at school that I'm a virgin after our failed attempt at having sex! What should I do?
Q. so i'm just going to start with my question. few weeks ago, a new guy in my class began to send me messages. i wasn't interested i'm not even now. but anyways i talked to him. he told me he likes me and so on. because he wanted to meet with me so i ...
A. 19 November 2010: Heh, well, here's the thing. You're worried he'll tell your friends that you had a failed attempt at having sex?
Do you realize that HE'LL get the shit storm on that one if he tells that story? His buddies will tease him mercilessly for not bein... (read in full...)
How can I get over my shyness and give him the confidence to try to kiss me again?
Q. I'm really inexperienced with guys compared to most girls my age I think... when it comes to boys i get really shy and nervous and embarrassed and because i'm so inexperienced i can never read the signs! Anyway now there's this guy that i really ...
A. 19 November 2010: Here's the thing. It's not a matter of overcoming your shyness and giving HIM the confidence to kiss you again. It's a matter of whether or not you want to kiss HIM!
Do you like him? Do you want to kiss him? Do you want to give off the righ... (read in full...)
My husband always talks about how hot porn stars are.
Q. my husband watches porn. we have a great sex life. but when he watches porn he says comments like, o look at that big ass, mm those boobs are huge or her pussy looks good i want to fuck it. he says he loves me and loves my body. why would he say ...
A. 18 November 2010: That's quite rude to say that. Commenting on the fact that a woman is pretty is one thing. Even married people who are secure in themselves can politely appreciate that someone else is good looking, but saying you want to have sex with another ... (read in full...)
He made a joke about fancying my daughter and now I don't want him near her!
Q. I started a relationship with a 35 year old guy last year who doesnt have much experience with women. He is close to his mum and sister and her children but apart from that has always lived alone, has never been pubbing or clubbing and only has a ...
A. 18 November 2010: Hmm...I'm actually going to go with the minority on this one and agree with jmtmj. Your daughter is grown. It's not as skeevy as if she were 13 or something like that.
If he were really making a joke about liking your daughter, he'd have sai... (read in full...)
Girlfriend constantly wants me to chose her over my family!
Q. My girlfriend continually demands that I choose her over my family, and refuses to compromise about the issue. She comes from a broken family, and has picked fights with my mom, sister, and brother over menial issues. She demands that I take her ...
A. 18 November 2010: I agree with everyone here, but I want to add something else. This is something most people don't realize in their relationships, since they're so focused on the here and now that they don't see true warning signs when they see them.
Notic... (read in full...)
Are these signs of cheating?
Q. Hi everyone, I am suspecting that my bf is cheating on me. There are many reasons why I feel this way. - I came home to him today showering, which he would never do this late in the day - he wanted to change the sheets because he claimed tha...
A. 18 November 2010: Hillary. It's BS. With all the dirty underwear in the world, it's illogical that he would manufacture laundry to do, much less strip the sheets after 3 days, wash them, and put them back on the bed. He also washed himself in the shower. Not a ... (read in full...)
Wife says she's in love with both of us!
Q. Dear Cupid, I am a 33 year old who has been with the same woman for 14 years and been married for 7 of those years. I love this woman with everything I have. We have four children together and are very happy together. My question is, rec...
A. 18 November 2010: Let me ask you this question. If you hadn't had surgery and the hospital stay, and if you didn't have the sickness that put you into surgery in the first place, would you still put up with your wife cheating on you?
You are a Christian, and it's... (read in full...)
My husband said he'd run me over!
Q. This is not the first time we have fought. Yesturday on the way to drop our 6 year old daughter at school my husband told me if I got out of the car he would run my bitch self over. He didn't mean it literally but it hurt that he said it. He was ...
A. 18 November 2010: Are you really serious?? You're getting mentally and verbally abused and threatened (threatening to run someone over isn't funny or a joke), but that's secondary to the real problem.
What dark place is this coming from that he is suggesti... (read in full...)
I've just started a new relationship and found out I have herpes! How do I tell her she needs to get tested?
Q. I recently found out I had herpes. God knows how long I've had it. I've started in a commited relationship and we've had unprotected sex. How can I tell her to get tested? I feel horrible....
A. 18 November 2010: Yeah, you've gotta tell her before you have any other physical contact with her whatsoever. This is the reason why we don't have protected sex until much farther into a relationship, like after both people have tested for diseases.
I'm sorry to... (read in full...)
Fiancé wishes my penis was bigger, do you think I'm big enough?
Q. I need help. Me and my fiancé been together for over a year and I have to admit...we are both sexually active. She says she loves my penis size but constantly reminds me that she wish I was bigger. My penis is 6" long with 3.5" girth but she says ...
A. 18 November 2010: What??? You're totally and completely adequate and normal! Your fiance sounds like a real jerk. Daniel is right - criticizing penis size to a guy is like having your weight criticized as a girl!
Your fiance is seriously immature. 8 inches..... (read in full...)
Why would a 70 year old married man from the US come to visit my 37 year old friend in the Philipines? Will he just use her for sex?
Q. I would like to ask for some point of views. Do older married man like 65 yrs. old and above seek an affair because his wife cannot give him the sexual desires he needs? I have a friend who falls madly in love with an old married guy almost t...
A. 18 November 2010: The guy is married! What else could it be except for an ego-boosting romp, as is the whole internet relationship in the first place? Relationships solely on the internet tend to progress much slower than in real life, so this is quite possible ... (read in full...)
Are these signs of cheating?
Q. Hi everyone, I am suspecting that my bf is cheating on me. There are many reasons why I feel this way. - I came home to him today showering, which he would never do this late in the day - he wanted to change the sheets because he claimed tha...
A. 18 November 2010: Oh yeah, showering and changing the sheets after a few days sounds like cheating big time. Either that or he's a bedwetter. Sheets would smell like the woman he had in your house, and they would also smell like his wet spot. Let me guess, he ... (read in full...)
I cheated, confessed, my wife forgave me but I feel horrible!
Q. So this is my situation: recently I cheated on my wife...mostly emottional but it did almost go to the point fo having sex. I almost began the "act" with my lover but deep down I felt horrible and stopped. I just walked away and never looked bac...
A. 18 November 2010: You have a great wife, an amazing wife. You told her what happened and didn't wait to be "caught" by her. The issue now is why you cheated. The weakness is still there, and it's up to you to not only identify it and improve on yourself, but to ... (read in full...)
If he can spend a lot of days having fun then why should I have to text him constantly on my only day off?
Q. My boyfriend and I of 3 months are going through a rough patch. He lives 30 minutes away from me and its hard getting together. He just got his license a month ago and he promised that he would see me more but it’s been hard because I started a ...
A. 18 November 2010: He's not as interested in you as you are in him. You are doing all of the pursuing, and he's just treating you like a fixture. The real question is, do you want someone who could take you or leave you and pretty much rates you lower than driving ... (read in full...)
He never lets me leave this relationship!
Q. so me and my boyfriend have been dating a little over a year.. we have had our problems where i want to break up its happened like three times were i get fed up and just want to leave him but he never lets me like he is like "you will never leave ...
A. 18 November 2010: Yes, he's totally controlling you. Those things he says are veiled threats! You should break up with him with a couple of friends with you while you do it and get a restraining order against him.... (read in full...)
How do I end my marriage without the emotional blackmail?
Q. I have been married for nearly 2 years and have just busted my hubby for cheating. My husband is awaiting a transplant (kidney) and has numerous other medical conditions so we have had a pretty tough time including dealing with infertillity and his ...
A. 18 November 2010: Alright listen. I am a kidney transplant patient. Before I had the transplant, I was on dialysis for 7 months while waiting for the testing for myself and the donor. I had the transplant back in July. My point is, your husband can NOT use his ... (read in full...)
After being caught, how often do married men go back to their affair?
Q. how often do men go back to the woman they have had an affair with? After 17 years of marriage my husband had an affair with a colleague. He is a director of a company and it would be difficult to just leave, so still sees her at work. He swears to ...
A. 18 November 2010: It all depends on the origens and type of affair. If it was several years long and has a componant of deep emotions, odds are high that he'll at least stay in contact with her beyond an acceptable professional level.
However, if it was a day/week... (read in full...)
Wife wants more sex!
Q. In a long term marriage and find that husband's sex drive is declining while mine is escalating. I masturbate more frequently then we have sex. Is there anything I can do about this? Wish we had both felt like this when we were in our 20s and 30s!! ...
A. 18 November 2010: Yeah, I hear you. You know, it might be a medical thing regarding your husband's libido. Does he take anti-depressants, cholesterol or (especially) high blood pressure medicine? Any or all of those can sap sex drive. If this is the case, a visit ... (read in full...)
Wife wants more sex!
Q. In a long term marriage and find that husband's sex drive is declining while mine is escalating. I masturbate more frequently then we have sex. Is there anything I can do about this? Wish we had both felt like this when we were in our 20s and 30s!! ...
A. 17 November 2010: I agree with dirtball 100%.
One of the biggest boosts to a sex drive is variety. Learn and try a new technique. Break up the monotonous routine and have sex in a completely different way. Surprise him by doing something that you may not have... (read in full...)
Should I go to a strip club to lose my virginity?
Q. Well first off im an 18 years old and im still a virgin. Everyone say to me that im lucky because I can share that experince with someone I truely care about but im having second thoughts. That maybe I should go to strip club and pay for it. So do ...
A. 17 November 2010: Yeah, repetitive's got a huge point. What's worse, telling a girl that you're a virgin, or telling her you hired a backroom prostitute to break in?
It's more your "buddies" who pick on you for your virginity. The girl you become interest... (read in full...)
Web cam adventure is turning into a nightmare! I'm being blackmailed!
Q. I did some stuff on cam for a guy once, he recorded it. he lives over seas. and now his threatening to send it to all my facebook contacts, his saved them. please dont say i shouldnt have done that, i know that now. but what do i do about it? if...
A. 17 November 2010: How can he contact your Facebook friends without his own Facebook account for which he must provide a name? Yes, the IP address on every email he sends will pinpoint his location, and you (with your mom's help...and yes, this is too big for you to ... (read in full...)
Web cam adventure is turning into a nightmare! I'm being blackmailed!
Q. I did some stuff on cam for a guy once, he recorded it. he lives over seas. and now his threatening to send it to all my facebook contacts, his saved them. please dont say i shouldnt have done that, i know that now. but what do i do about it? if...
A. 17 November 2010: Listen, if he lives in the United States, you can have him arrested for possessing child pornography, as you are underage. Tell him that by distributing child pornography is a major felony that carries implications that will ruin his life.
Maybe... (read in full...)
Should I go to a strip club to lose my virginity?
Q. Well first off im an 18 years old and im still a virgin. Everyone say to me that im lucky because I can share that experince with someone I truely care about but im having second thoughts. That maybe I should go to strip club and pay for it. So do ...
A. 17 November 2010: Going to a strip club or paying for sex is extremely risky! There's nothing in the man's handbook that says that herpes or worse is part of the manhood rite of passage! It also won't help in the event of finding someone you care for because not ... (read in full...)
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