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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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Where is this relationship going? I think her feelings may be more serious than mine. Nor sure what to do?
Q. Been with my girlfriend for about 9 months now, first few months didn't really count as we started dating towards the end of the uni year, then I went travelling over summer, and we live in different areas but still spoke frequently and met up when ...
A. 7 February 2013: She doesn't know you don't want more so you have to tell her now. It may take you 10 more years to want to settle down but it sounds like she wants to get married as soon as she graduates. Tell her about wanting to go slow, then she can decide if ... (read in full...)
She said she knew I wasn't a Relationship Person and that I was not Emotionally Available. What does my Ex mean by this?
Q. I was seeing this girl for a while and last night we finally talked for the first time since we broke up. She said she always knew in the back of her mind that i wasn't a relationship person and we weren't going to be anything more than what it ...
A. 6 February 2013: There is very little detail here. She's wrong to break up with you and make assumptions. It's almost like she rejects you first before you reject her. You know what? I have no idea. In general an emotionally unavailable person is a someone (usually ... (read in full...)
How to deal with being hurt in the past so it won't ruin my relationship?
Q. I would like some serious advice on dealing with past trust issues. I've been in three major relationships. One of them ended because I broke up with her over her getting into some things I found unacceptable - drugs and self-destructive behav...
A. 5 February 2013: The only person you can trust is yourself, that you can handle whatever outcome and you become a stronger person in each relationship. Look at the word trust. It's a verb. What exactly are you doing when you trust? Trust is simply being. It does not ... (read in full...)
I can't get over that my husband was in love with his best female friend
Q. I cannot stop being so terribly sad. My husband was in love with his best friend (female) for a ways into our relationship. When I found out, we were already engaged, and had been together for a couple years. I was crushed, but so in love with him ...
A. 5 February 2013: When a relationship ends, a sensible person will move on and feelings do fade even when he sees his ex again. His family is being mean to you by bringing her up, especially when you are already engaged. This is in the past. You have no ownership of ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wont get engaged to me unless I get her a 20 000 euro engagement ring
Q. Hi, I ve posted on this website before and I ve found the answere really helpful so I am hoping for some more advice please. I ve been agonizing over this for some time, would be really interested to hear what others think.. My girlfriend w...
A. 5 February 2013: I would not even get married to her. This is what your parents tried to tell you but they knew you won't listen to them. My brother got his fiancee the same amount on an engagement ring. They were each other's firsts and had few problems in the ... (read in full...)
How do you cope with an annoyed partner?
Q. How do you cope with an annoyed partner - he's annoyed basically because his brother in law (my brother) has not yet bought his Christmas present (yes, Christmas just gone). I'm fed up with hearing about it - although I do agree with him to an e...
A. 5 February 2013: What can his family member do? Force him to buy the present? Maybe he can't afford to buy it because he is careless with money or some unexpected bill came up. This is only between your partner and his brother in law. He says he doesn't care so ... (read in full...)
We're waiting until we're married -- but what if he doesn't have enough to satisfy me?
Q. Dear Cupid I am a 30 year old female due to get married in a few months. My fiancé and I are both virgins, we decided to wait till marriage. It's never something I regretted. We have spoken about sex and I have friends who are sexually active ...
A. 4 February 2013: Your G spot if 2 inches inside the vagina. He only has to be able to last long and find ways to hit it. If his penis can't satisfy you his fingers and tongue can. You say you are not going to regret waiting so you have to keep your word. It takes ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting to feel hurt, upset and objectified?
Q. I hope someone can help. I'm a black woman who's been dating a white guy for the past four years. Recently I found myself with his computer. I was surfing the net and ended up peeking at his Facebook messages, which I know I shouldn't have done. ...
A. 4 February 2013: You are entitled to your feelings. You were alone and thankfully there was no one to overreact to. Maybe at the beginning he didn't know there was more to just sex. After 4 years he is still with you. A sexual object rarely lasts longer than a year. ... (read in full...)
Our relationship has changed since I've been pregnant, what should I do?
Q. My relationship has changed since I've been pregnant, and not for the better. My husband and I used to be very active together, but since I've become pregnant, I've had to change my fitness routines, so we don't share that bond anymore. On the ...
A. 4 February 2013: You should join a prenatal yoga class and make some new friends there. When you fulfill your emotional needs somewhere else you won't be so dependent on your husband.... (read in full...)
If the Past is the Past with regards to Sexual History, why do some keep in touch
Q. Hello, this site has been great for me and my relationship over the past months. Been reading many other post over many months and one thing seems to stick out or contradict each other. So just wanted to hear some thoughts on this. My ques...
A. 4 February 2013: Because such person has no integrity and boundaries. The "leave the past in the past" is for people who have no loyalty issues and have no need for outside attention. People who have a past is not automatically synonymous with people who will keep ... (read in full...)
I broke up with my boyfriend over this situation. Was I wrong?
Q. If you get confused about the situation, please ask me to clarify. I need as many opinions as I can get. My boyfriend's aunt never met me before, so she told him to invite me over to her house for the super bowl. When we went to her house, they ...
A. 4 February 2013: You were not wrong. Your boyfriend does not know whether you are going to speak to him again. If you do you have to be the one calling him. It's a tough situation for you both but I feel that your boyfriend should stand up to you more and at least ... (read in full...)
What caused him to change his mind so dramatically? I can't figure it out!
Q. Hey guys, this is basically a question about long distance relationships. The one I was in has already ended but I am just desperate for an outsider’s opinion on this because my friends and family are too close to the situation. I play in a ba...
A. 4 February 2013: It's actually better to end it sooner than to drag it on. When you end it later you just look back and feel you wasted time on a fantasy. I think he ended because you were actually more serious than he is. What he spewed out was just words. When you ... (read in full...)
I really care for my boyfriend's little boy, but how does he feel about me?
Q. This might seem like a strange question but here goes, I have been dating a man for nearly 7 months. I met his son more or less straight away. He is a gorgeous 10 year old boy who is polite, non-demanding, intelligent, quiet and just an all roun...
A. 4 February 2013: I think he likes you. He left the kitchen because he wanted you and your boyfriend to have a good time. It was not because he was upset that you took away dad and son bonding time. You had your period so you were extra sensitive. It's so beautiful ... (read in full...)
'Grass is always greener' syndrome in my relationship?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been dating for nearly three years. Currently, I am 23 and she will soon be 22. We met in college and were friends for a year before starting to date, so we had an established friendship beforehand. She's perfect;...
A. 4 February 2013: The mind likes to boggle. It likes to analyze things to death. It's our calculative mind that wants bigger better things. We are in a consumer culture and our greediness is taught since we were 3 and could understand TV commercials. This syndrome is ... (read in full...)
I'm almost certain my partner is planning to leave me and our son, how do I get him to come clean about his intentions?
Q. All I want is the truth I'm almost certain my partner is planning on leaving me and our son. He has left before 4 years ago and is starting to act in the same manner he did the last time. Clothing/belongings have started to depl...
A. 4 February 2013: I feel his leaving his manipulative. He can certainly live with you. He enjoys torturing you, which is his only intention. His leaving and coming back is a way of doing that. When a person wants to control your emotions you can't respond with ... (read in full...)
Confused about masturbation and things related.
Q. Right some questions, masturbation when in a relationship - isn't the whole point of masturbating because you can choose who you want to look at as in porn/think about and not many people think of their own girlfriend because there is no point? ...
A. 4 February 2013: For some people it's easier to look at porn in order to masturbate, me included. Some people prefer romance novels. However if my partner prefers me not to look at porn I have no problems stopping it. If I used my own imagination to masturbate it ... (read in full...)
Is she too young for me to be doing more than flirting?
Q. Hi, So before people start calling me things please read everything. I'm currently married but me and my wife are looking to go our separate ways. We had our first child when we were 18 and got pressured into marriage(her family felt very strong...
A. 4 February 2013: I am not one to get angry about what strangers do but reading the whole thing it makes it more wrong because 1) the divorce is not final, 2) she has a boyfriend. Get the divorce, child custody issues over with then you are free to look for single ... (read in full...)
My ex wants to get together again but I'm not sure if I want the heartache
Q. My ex boyfriend and father of my 4 year old daughter wants to give us another chance but im not sure if its worth the heartache again. We were only 17 and 23 when we got together, we were together 2 years then I had my little girl at just turned 2...
A. 3 February 2013: No one wants to answer it because he does cheat in the future then we will feel bad. I am the kind that forgive if I still have feelings for the guy. When you date a new guy it's not without the risk of heartache. I would advise you to go slow and ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend broke up with me because of my depression and distance. Should I wait to see if he'll come back?
Q. My ex and I were at school together in Norway when we were seven. Years later due to the wonders of facebook, we got in contact again. We found out we both loved hill walking, etc…so a couple of summers later we went on a walking holiday in Norway ...
A. 3 February 2013: Love on his part has always been like, it's manageable, we can try things, you love me, so . . .. On your part you have so much hope and you are yearning for acceptance. Your depression in your relationship is sign that it's not working. You are sad ... (read in full...)
I'm married no longer love my husband but am still in love with my ex
Q. What should I do? Im 27 years old.. Im not in love with my husband, Ben anymore.. I have a 6 year old kid.. My story is like this. He was my boyfriend during my college years.. After graduation, I move back in our province, then I met again my ...
A. 3 February 2013: Try to separate your own marriage from wanting to get together with Cris. When your heart is not fully with your husband, you are bound to find faults with him. When I look at suffering in a marriage I think about abuse, alcohol, gambling and ... (read in full...)
Did watching the birth of our daughter make my husband gay?
Q. I’m 32 years old woman and now I’m experiencing really hard time in my marriage. My husband(he’s 33) and I are married for 3 years and 6 months ago our daughter was born. My husband never wanted to be in the delivery room, but I wanted him to be ...
A. 3 February 2013: It doesn't excuse his cheating though. He could be bisexual before you were married. Watching a mom give birth should not take away his sense of right and wrong.... (read in full...)
After 26 years of marriage, no affection from my husband. Is this the end? Do I need to make plans?
Q. I've been married for 26yrs we have had our ups and downs like everyone do.But for the past 3yrs my husband gives me no attention,love or affection.I have told him about this,but it's like talking to the wall.He don't talk anymore,and when we do he ...
A. 3 February 2013: It doesn't have to be the end. When a partner can't give us what we need we tend to want those things even more. I used to think I need to get married, I need a stable guy in my life. Now that I am single I am happier than when I was in ... (read in full...)
Girls: Would it bother you if a boy was stronger than your boyfriend?
Q. Girls, would it bother you if a boy was stronger than your boyfriend? My girlfriend invites me to her home often. She has a 12 year old brother who wrestles. He's always challenging me to wrestle and arm-wrestle. So, I did one day and he beat me b...
A. 3 February 2013: No it wouldn't bother me. It just shows how sports should be a lifelong activity, not just something you do because you are in school. I bet Arnold Scharwzenegger is half as strong as he was in the movies 20 some years ago. ... (read in full...)
Handling breakup after deciding to break up with mother of my child
Q. Gf and I have been together for 5 yrs and have a 3 yr old daughter. This past thanksgiving I found out she has been flirting with a coworker from a different office, 1/2 hour away. Initially I was upset but thought that "innocent" flirting was ...
A. 3 February 2013: Is she moving out or are you moving out? You have to talk to a lawyer about this. You are not married so the process is not as complicated in a common law setting. You do need prove that she is cheating so before you confront her you need to save ... (read in full...)
My BF and I had a fight a week ago and he hasn't called me since. What should I do?
Q. Dear Cupid My bf and myself had a fight, to be precise he fought with me saying that I'm bugging him when I asked him to spend some time with me also along with his friends. He hasn't called me for a week, what should I do now. I am scared tha...
A. 2 February 2013: I can't really call that a boyfriend. A man who loves you has time for you. He would take your needs seriously and not get mad, give you the silent treatment just because you have needs. You also should not be with in a relationship when you are ... (read in full...)
The woman I like romantically only seems to want a flirty/ sexual relationship and I want more. What can I do?
Q. Hi Everyone, This is going to be long. I'm not a player or anything, decent guy, however I am very good looking, I'm a suit, and I'm pretty 'alpha' guy. However, I am absolutely nervous right now and need some advice because I don't know what...
A. 2 February 2013: Then you tell her the same thing. The next woman you date is someone you will get married to. Dating is a process of getting to know each other. You may be incompatible at the end but at least she wants you to be ready for marriage if there is the ... (read in full...)
My ex is asking me to give him another chance but he won't finish with his girlfriend. What should I do?
Q. I need some advise. Me and my ex bf of 6 years broke up about 2 years ago due to arguments. He has a new gf who he has been with for the 2 years, but throughout the 2 years he has been emailing me, texting me asking me to meet him saying he is th...
A. 2 February 2013: You stop responding to his emails so you have nothing to wait for. You will stop loving him if you don't allow him to contact you. Both of you can only start fresh with someone else when you are over each other. When you refuse to let go, you are ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with my boyfriend? He has bipolar disorder and his behaviour upsets me.
Q. I'm really worried about what is going on with my boyfriend at the moment. He said he would walk up to my house to meet me yesterday, and then we would go to his house. He didn't turn up, so I went round to his house (he lives in the same town as ...
A. 2 February 2013: My borderline ex broke up with me because he felt a lost interest even when I texted him several times and call every night. I was not devastated. I was relieved. One of the last words I said to him was he shouldn't be in relationships at all. I ... (read in full...)
What can I do to open up more so I don't lose my boyfriend?
Q. So my situation is a bit of an odd one. Basically, when I was younger, at the age of about 11, I developed a massive crush for a guy 4 years older than me. Obviously I was only young at the time, but it seemed so real to me. I would constant...
A. 2 February 2013: Your childhood crush was a family set up gone wrong. You felt on the spot and was embarrassed that your feelings were showing to everyone. Now you are an adult and in a consensual relationship. No one is here to ridicule your feelings, and to tease ... (read in full...)
how can one person think your soul mates and the other not?
Q. hi, ive been with my boyfriend for 7 months. Over the last few months ive been doubting as to whether we are right for eachother or not. We don't have a lot in common an have very different opinions on things. And I dont feel my personality is at ...
A. 2 February 2013: Go take some photos of yourselves and travel to interesting places. Simple solution but not really.
You fulfill his needs but obviously he is clueless as to what makes you happy. If you think that soul mates can read each other's minds then you are ... (read in full...)
He wants us to try a threesome what will that do to our love?
Q. Pls I need your opinion, my boyfriend enjoy sex with me, and we both satisfy with each other, but his always begging me to give him a chance to try is fantasy of bringing a girl to join us,he said, he only want to know how it feel having two girls ...
A. 2 February 2013: I had been the ex wife doing the threesome. I had also been the third wheel. Both were two women one man. The first was I was pregnant and didn't want sex much but didn't want my ex husband to be deprived. I was curious about sex with women too. The ... (read in full...)
I think I'm developing feelings for this online guy. How to handle this? He tells me lots about him but never asks much about me
Q. I "think" I am developing feelings for a guy online.. There's obviously a few issues with that other than the very obvious one of it been an "online" friendship but also he lives in America... I again think the feeling is mutual but have no idea ...
A. 2 February 2013: Sometimes you can have feelings but can't do anything about it because of the distance. Some people are just content about being long distance pals because it allows them to express feelings, practice communicating with the opposite sex without the ... (read in full...)
Was my room mate rude or am I over reacting?
Q. I moved in with one of my good friends a few months ago, around September/October. This is the first time either one of us has had a room mate. For New Years, we had other friends over and cooked dinner together. I brought 2 bottles of champagn...
A. 2 February 2013: I think she moved you in because she needs the extra income and not because she is a good friend. Maybe she thinks because she is lenient with the rent she feels justified taking your food. You underreacted partly because you are afraid of ... (read in full...)
I feel as if I go out of my way for everyone and no-one can be bothered when it comes to me.
Q. Its' my birthday today. A milestone. A special one. I've had a tear in my eye most of the day – not because I have reached 40 but because I feel so let down and now I'm feeling that maybe I'm being unreasonable, selfish and ungrateful. Situat...
A. 1 February 2013: Don't take this as a sign that you love them more and they love you less. It would also look like you are not as important to them. The truth is that they probably think very highly of you because you are dependable.
Good for you for treating your... (read in full...)
On the Fence about My Relationship
Q. This is an unusual back story which I will try to sum up, and I would appreciate suggestions on how to change my perception. Relationship: Lesbian Couple (both bisexual) Ages: Me (late 20's), her (early 30's) Looks: We are both attractive ...
A. 1 February 2013: You fell hard for her when she was mean to you. Now that she is nicer you lost that loving feeling. Overall I feel that your needs are not getting met. The medication that helps her ADD and narcissism could be the cause of her disinterest in sex. My ... (read in full...)
I feel lost without my boyfriend and just want to contact him!
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up a month ago, over the phone. It was a somewhat mutual breakup once I found out who he was. Our morals and lifestyles are far too different to make a serious relationship work (he is a serious partier, smoker and ...
A. 29 January 2013: If you want to move on from him sooner you need to go no contact, not even to say you are doing okay. You go to church so you will understand that security is within you. You are never alone. Just hang in there and you will get used to being single ... (read in full...)
He just cheats on me spirtually every 2 months, but defends himself saying he enjoys being a player...should I marry him?
Q. My boyfriend of 7 month now is driving me crazy with the childishness he do frequently, and by "drives me crazy" i mean insecure! -he is great in bed, if we have free time of 5 hours we simply did it for four hours, like 3 times or so! -very ten...
A. 29 January 2013: Marriage won't change his cheating ways. He is a sex addict and constantly need outside attention to fulfill his ego. Already 7 months he is doing this. Sex now is good but it can't keep up after a year. You can have great orgasms but after a while ... (read in full...)
My wife is constantly texting another man, asked me to move out and yet says she wants to work on things!
Q. Hi. I have used this site a few times and thank those who have added comments, it helps. Will try to be brief here... Married for 12 years, 3 great kids. Wife and I have always been great friends, quite a bit in common but our sex life has...
A. 29 January 2013: I don't know why you are the one moving out when she is having an affair. Putting up with her is not being nice. It's being a doormat. I seriously do not know what purpose does the separation serve, except to send her to the arms of the coworker. ... (read in full...)
1st date--he chewed gum with his mouth open and has small hands. Should I move on?
Q. I went on a first date with a man last night, he seemed alright, ok looking, we got on well, he sent me a nice message saying how nice I was after. But he chewed gym with his mouth open, not nice. And I noticed he had small hands - could this mea...
A. 29 January 2013: Your question made me smile.
I was with a guy with hands same size as mine. I have a short stature but sex with him hurt.
If he chews gum with his mouth open. It means that when you get intimate with him his mouth will be open too.
I was onc... (read in full...)
Continually angry and non-committed girlfriend
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for about 3 years now. I'm not sure why, but she gets upset at the simplest things and throws huge fits. I will be the first to say that I can be rough around the edges and can get annoying sometimes. But we ...
A. 29 January 2013: I think people do that because they are afraid of boredom in a relationship. They pick fights, provoke passion in people to feel alive. You can't reason with her and you will never win. If you decide you don't want to give up yet, then you need to ... (read in full...)
He's spoken about getting married and our future together, but he isnt sexually attracted to me! What should I do?
Q. So me and my boyfriend have dated for a while now and have been pretty serious. He's started bringing up moving and getting married- I previously got out of an engagement with someone I was with for a few years and it makes me nervous. But wi...
A. 28 January 2013: I believe if you love someone unconditionally, you will love their bodies too. You sound fine to me. A lot of men are not physically my type but I can enjoy sex with a lot of them and I can make them feel wanted. Do you enjoy sex with him? Or must ... (read in full...)
He's spoken about getting married and our future together, but he isnt sexually attracted to me! What should I do?
Q. So me and my boyfriend have dated for a while now and have been pretty serious. He's started bringing up moving and getting married- I previously got out of an engagement with someone I was with for a few years and it makes me nervous. But wi...
A. 28 January 2013: I don't know if he is hinting at open relationships here. A lot of men suggest them, then get upset when the women do have sex with other men. Has he actually said that you are not attractive, or is this your own thinking? Is not being able to have ... (read in full...)
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