A
female
age
51-59,
* Forever yours
writes:I've been married for 26yrs we have had our ups and downs like everyone do.But for the past 3yrs my husband gives me no attention,love or affection.I have told him about this,but it's like talking to the wall.He don't talk anymore,and when we do he always say,I don't know.We only have sex when I ask for it.Is this the end of our marriage?I do sit and dream about how I would like it to be, but I kw it would never be....!!!If this is the end, then I need to do something about it,as I'm not getting younger.i need love, and to be happy.Please help me, if anyone can.thank you for reading and any replies.x Reply to this Question
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male
reader, eddie85  +, writes (3 February 2013):
 Have you spoken or shared your concerns with your husband? I mean a sit down, heart to heart with him about your future and where he sits with you?
There could be many reasons why your husband has become uninterested in you. Have you considered he could be depressed or over worked? I suspect after 26 years your husband has built up a series of resentments in regards to something. Or he could simply be tired of all the work that marriage requires. And, as you know, it DOES require work, even after 26 years (if not more).
Have you tried going out of your way to make your husband get re-interested in you? Have you tried going on a special vacation? Recreating your honeymoon trip? Perhaps there is something you aren't doing that he needs. Do you still have fun with one another? Is all your engagements with one another about work, house stuff, or kid stuff? If you were him, would you want to hang around with yourself?
These are all questions that you need to reflect upon with yourself. I would also highly recommend you talk to a therapist -- even on your own. I am not saying the problem is yours, but a professional could help you determine if your marriage is worth saving and what sort of actions you could take to improve it. You only provided us with about 150 words so I am at a lost as to what to suggest. Surely you have some suspicions as to what is really going on.
Finally, it won't be easy, and it will take time. Divorce and being single is not an easy road either. I hope you do take some sort of action though, because if you continue to do what you are doing, you'll likely have to live out the rest of your life in these circumstance.
Eddie
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (3 February 2013):
 It doesn't have to be the end. When a partner can't give us what we need we tend to want those things even more. I used to think I need to get married, I need a stable guy in my life. Now that I am single I am happier than when I was in relationships. I don't care if I would get married again.
I think that the real test whether people should get married is that even when they totally lost their sex drives, you would stick by them. It's kind of hard to expect everyone to be able to have sex until their 80's. We all get to a point when we feel too old to do anything but impotence could hit people at any time. It has to do with genetics and health. If your husband loves you I think you should stay and find a good dildo for yourself when he doesn't want it. Your husband is not talking but assuming he still loves you and finds you attractive, he is suffering inside for the fear of losing his manhood. If he knows that you accept him no matter what maybe he will open up to you. If he suspects that you will leave him because of this he will shut down. Divorcing him is no guarantee that you will find happiness and physical affections.
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