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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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My head says the break up is the right thing, my heart is telling me no
Q. Basically, me and my boyfriend have just split up from a 2 year relationship, one of which has been long- distance as I am at university. I am 19 and he is 20. We're both absolutely devastated as we both still love each other and were also best f...
A. 28 April 2013: You should just keep it broken up. If you get back together things won't be the same. You are having doubts because you know that love will not be enough. A relationship is much more than loyalty and stability. When you have a guy who can match up ... (read in full...)
I haven't told my parents about him. If I break up with him he'll tell them and I'll be homeless.
Q. So I have been with my boyfriend for 2years and want to break up. If he breaks up with me that's all fine and dandy his family knows everything about us. But if I break up with him... I dont know what he would do my parents don't like him and they ...
A. 28 April 2013: How are you so sure that your parents won't take you in? Are they the kind that will disown you if you don't marry a guy they pick?
If you can't rely on your parents as a safety net, or won't tell them you picked the wrong guy, then your only choi... (read in full...)
If my b/f loves oral sex then why does he so seldom ask for it?
Q. Ok, I have a few questions about guys' sexual preferences. Background : we have a loving relationship and a fantastic sex life. He makes me orgasm 90% of the time through penetration alone otherwise he'll finish me off with his fingers. ...
A. 27 April 2013: Some people are pleasers. It's deep in their personality and it's not something you can reason. I know a lot of women love cunnilingus, can't go without, and I am not one of those women. I prefer giving oral sex. I would enjoy a man going down on me ... (read in full...)
I suspect my husband may be gay or bisexual and now he's told me to leave the house! What should I do?
Q. Hi I will be married almost 10 years soon, my husband hasn't taken me out very much, usually we go away a few days once a year. We don't go out socially but he goes out with his male friend. We haven't been sexually active for almost a year! He ...
A. 27 April 2013: If he's gay and not even bisexual, then he can't demonstrate the sexual desire a husband should. He could be a closet sissy gay, he still needs to tell you the truth, and be prepared to supplement you with enough spousal support that you can be ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to kiss others if you are dating but not exclusive?
Q. Honest opinions on this, if you are taking a girl out on dates, so you are dating now. Is it okay to still kiss other girls, or does that count as cheating even if she isn't your girlfriend? I don't mean a lot of dates only about 2 maybe 3, but s...
A. 27 April 2013: What is your definition of properly dating? There are many stages in dating. After the third date, you are still going to take her out. There will be a next time, maybe that's what you meant. Maybe it means there is a potential, that's it. For me ... (read in full...)
Does everything has to be "his way"? Is there anyway to get him to see reason?
Q. Hello everyone, hoping to get some objective feedback. My partner and I have been together for three and a half years, but have been in a long distance relationship for the past 1 year and 8 months (approx) and we have a two year old son who live...
A. 27 April 2013: What kind of boyfriend talks like that? I won't get back together with him.
I think he wanted to dump you anyway, so he used that "I can't take long distance anymore" as an excuse. The first time when he bailed out on living with you, he was alre... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about her being a threat to our relationship?
Q. Im a 20 year old female and i am in a relationship with a great guy. BUt I'm concerned you see a few months back the girl showed up out of the blue to see him before he got home from work i was at the house making dinner and she introduced herself ...
A. 27 April 2013: He does not look at her as girlfriend or wife material, that's for sure. She is a foul mouthed person, the kind of woman a man has no problems using and throwing away. She does sound like an on and off FWB though. Curling up on the couch with the ... (read in full...)
In the limbo of friend/ex/possible bf.
Q. Ok, so I just want others input. Helps me analyze things from a different view. I went out with her and she broke up with me. (Basically, she was young. Impossible expectations (please don't judge me like I'm a low life, just take my word on ...
A. 24 April 2013: You would be rebound no. 2. When you come back to an ex after playing the field, the relationship has cheapened and you two are just options, not first choice priority. She is only saying not in the near future, because she still has feelings for ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is taking some time to think about us! I don't want this relationship to end, please help!
Q. hi everyone, my girlfriend is wanting to have time to think about us. she is big in church and I go to church with her sometimes cause she likes it and she told me that she is under alot of stress thinking about stuff and this morning she told...
A. 23 April 2013: I don't know what you did either but you said church, then degrading, so I am guessing you had sex and the church peoplemade her feel dirty. You sound like a gentle and considerate person so it couldn't be that you pressured her into sex. If sex was ... (read in full...)
Why is he going from very very hot to cool and will a bit of jealousy make him make his move once and for all?
Q. Does making someone jealous work generally as in they will show their feelings or come forward quicker if they think someone else is interested in you. I wouldnt usually be into games like that but a friend of mine who iv been talking to nearl...
A. 23 April 2013: For some people, their drive is fueled by competition, and for others they withdraw because they don't like the idea of scoring. It took him a long time to suggest meeting up. He feels he doesn't deserve you and is afraid of rejection, or screwing ... (read in full...)
How do I approach my partner without being hostile and critical?
Q. Hey, need some advice on how to approach my partner about how i'm feeling (unappreciated and unimportant) without sounding critical or hostile. We've been together 3 years, live together and have a gorgeous 6 month old baby. I'm on maternity lea...
A. 23 April 2013: You are afraid of being confrontational, so there is a shut down, and this shut down is what makes you drift apart. Realize that your tiredness is temporary. I know Canada is big on breast feeding. 2 years is ideal they say. For the sake of a good ... (read in full...)
Is my girlfriend hiding something from me?
Q. My girlfriend has lied to me in the past about where she was from. At the time, I forgave it as she appeared to be really sincere, and she cried her eyes out after admitting it to me. I felt bad and decided to give her a chance because she really ...
A. 23 April 2013: She is a pathological liar and she is very bad at lying. She doesn't cover up her stretch marks. She said she screwed up in high school when supposedly she did so well that she graduated early.
She has deep issues with self acceptance, and infe... (read in full...)
Is my man ignoring me because he doesn't want to be with me?
Q. About 3 days ago I was texting my boyfriend from Florida, where I was on vacation. We have been together just about a month now but fell in love immediately, he has introduced me to his family and his daughter and I as planning on having him meet my ...
A. 22 April 2013: The relationship went too fast and both of you idealized it. You have to look into your anger. You wanted to meet him but was disappointed that he didn't. When you said you were serious it sounded like it wasn't a joke, you were accusing him of ... (read in full...)
I'm being accused of cheating because I bruise easy. Men don't trust me!
Q. I divorced my husband with whom I had an almost ten year relationship due to the fact that I could no longer take his jealousy and accusations. I had never been unfaithful to him. Part of the accusations were my bruises, I am clumsy and bump into ...
A. 22 April 2013: Looks like this guy will be another ex. You only mentioned two men so you can't say you always pick these jealous men. The problem is that you have sex before knowing him too well, you don't really want to commit to him, and then you justify staying ... (read in full...)
Is this friendship, mind games or more?
Q. Is this friendly behaviour or more? Mr A mids 40s, i am mid 20s. Both single work together. He does not do this with any one else. He throws things at me then will tease i assault him e.g hoola hoops, my sweet bag, paper clip , soft things an...
A. 21 April 2013: He's a guy with mid life crisis and needs a young girl to make him feel young again. He wants to be more than friends but is afraid to ask you out because of the age gap and company policy. You are his dream girl up until you tell him you are dating ... (read in full...)
Is this relationship healthy? Should we break up?
Q. So me and my boyfriend have been having problems a lot lately. Last week and today we were fighting because i apparently am not nice to him, and i dont support him, and i don't love him correctly. He also won't allow me to talk to any guys besides ...
A. 21 April 2013: It's unhealthy. He's controlling you. It's not that he wants a break up. He's using fear to ensure your loyalty and devotion. Underneath his bullying exterior lies an insecure loser. Nothing you do would ever be enough. You should get out as soon as ... (read in full...)
My b/f doesn't text or call me. Is this normal?
Q. I have been with my current bf for two months. At the beginning (like two weeks), he usually wrote me like 5 texts per day and I liked it, we saw each other like 2 times per week and I thought the relationship was really great. After like two weeks ...
A. 21 April 2013: I can't even call him boyfriend. He's still into his ex. Maybe they are having an on and off relationship. He got what he wanted for you, which is a woman wanting to have a relationship with him, but not the actual reciprocal relationship. With this ... (read in full...)
My wife is very aggressive in bed, I feel emasculated.
Q. I have a unique problem. My wife is too aggressive in bed. She has been the one taking initiative right from day one, The first kiss, the first time we had sex, she literally pulled me on top of her. It's been four years, and it seems when we...
A. 21 April 2013: Control doesn't have to be all physical. You don't have to be all muscular to be a master. Your mind can also do the dominating. You can command to do things. Tell her to suck you. Stop when you are about to come. Make her beg for you. You direct ... (read in full...)
I lied to hubby about child being his, marriage is unhappy and another child on the way! Please help.
Q. I am 35.I met my hubby 2009 through a friend. Immediately we fell in love. I have a good job. He works as shop cashier. I was abit uncomfortable and embarrassed with this, but later accepted him. He however intelligent, hardworking. He was sharing ...
A. 21 April 2013: There is no hope for the marriage but there is hope for you and your children's lives. The only reason he married you was for convenience, and so that you wouldn't go out with other men. There was no love. It is not something worth holding on to. ... (read in full...)
Shocked, worried and confused. I'm in the dark with a pregnant ex and I've done nothing wrong.
Q. Ok, here goes nothing. I met my ex while attending university. Everything was going fine for the first 3 months until she found out she was pregnant. That's when I began to notice a change in the way I was treated. She blames says its bc of old ...
A. 21 April 2013: It's hard to know with that little information. You are trying to ask us why she broke up with you and whether her reason was legit. Were the pictures and text messages there before you dated her? I would wonder if she got pregnant by someone else ... (read in full...)
I pushed her away in the past, but now we've rekindled the spark, but we are both married and not sure how to proceed.
Q. This is hard to share. I met the love of my life (I'll call her Jane) in High School. It sounds typical, but it's true. We dated for three years, and it was love from the very first moment. Those three years were the best of my life. The feelings...
A. 21 April 2013: I am a person who doesn't believe in soul mates, but I do believe you have to be in love with the person you marry in order for your mind to not think about anyone else. She has two children, so she has to consider if it's worth it to break up the ... (read in full...)
What is seeing a psychiatrist like?
Q. Hey all. I don't want to sit here and write a sob story but throughout my entire life (I am 18 right now) I have been through some really bad things. Not only am I not over the things that have happened in my past, but even right now in my life I am ...
A. 21 April 2013: A psychologist is more empathetic. A psychiatrist's interest is to sell you medicine, adjust the dosage and give you a diagnosis. I had to go to a psychiatrist because of uncontrollable crying and depression. I found counselors in school to be very ... (read in full...)
My girl who used to have a sex addiction, now thinks sex is dirty and won't be intimate with me. What can I do?
Q. Recently, my GF admitted she had a past sexual addiction. I was not totally unaware of this, but recently we've been having our own tension when it comes to sex. She now views sex as "dirty." She now is not capable of being intimate with me...
A. 21 April 2013: Sex will not suddenly become sacred and beautiful after a marriage and signing a piece of paper, if she thinks sex is dirty now.
She feels she is in a dilemma. Men leave her after sex and because of lack of sex, so she feels marriage is the solu... (read in full...)
I'm in love with her but she won't choose me over the other guy in her life
Q. Hi. I will not take your much of time so lets start with my problem. I'm in love with a girl. Its been 3 years since I fell in love with her. I'm 22 years old and she is 20 years. I know her because we are family friends. So the story starts. On...
A. 19 April 2013: She is in a relationship with the other guy, only friends with you, yet it's hard to decide. . . She fed you a line to keep you hanging because she doesn't mind having one extra person to love her. Sounds like she loves neither of you and she will ... (read in full...)
I found out my husband has Alexithymia. I think my marriage is in trouble!
Q. I need help. I think my marriage is in serious trouble. My husband has always had a problem showing emotion, sympathy, compassion and empathy. He also has always spoken in monotone, no emotion in his words. When he says "I love you" you don't f...
A. 18 April 2013: Yes men don't show emotions. There has to be a moment when he became sad in life. Did his grandparents or pets die? Lost money, didn't get the job?
I am not sure if you can give him a label yet. My mom had always noticed my dad being the same way.... (read in full...)
Broke up - he came back - now he doesn't know what he wants?
Q. I am so confused by this man, who I love with all of my heart. I do not know what to do. Everyone tells me different advice, and I don't have any idea who is right. I met this man four years ago while I was in another relationship, and when that one...
A. 17 April 2013: Here's my guess. He is constantly breaking up and making up because he is an adrenaline junkie and he thrives on drama. The giveaway is the moment he got disappointed because you didn't explode on his bullshit. The thing you can't give him is the ... (read in full...)
BF told me today "You'd better not come back home until after 6pm" I pay rent & it's MY home too!
Q. Background info: My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. We moved in together for the first time last August. We attend the same college(as full time students) which is only a few minutes walk from our apartment. So, as the title say...
A. 17 April 2013: No apartment is worth staying in an abusive relationship. You need to take pictures of your bruised hand and show the police. Take pictures of your broken possessions. Tell them about his threats, about hurting you and posting nude pictures online. ... (read in full...)
I can't handle the competition he puts me through! How can I make him let me be the only one he dates?
Q. I lost my husband of 35 years in 2009. I stayed home without dating for 2 years and when ready, I decided to go online. I met a man 6 years older than I and was very impressed. In fact, I fell in love with him, but was not quite ready to jump ...
A. 16 April 2013: I see that you are at least around 60. I read that people your age goes fast in relationships because they don't have much time to wait. Maybe he is looking for someone who is ready to settle down. Still, he either lets the break up stay that way. ... (read in full...)
Help with obsessing over cheating younger boyfriend
Q. Help again in finding an answer.. Three weeks ago ,if u remember my original post, i found my boyfriend of 3.5 years in bed with another women, as u know he is a lot younger than me, but his betrayal devasted me.. which brings me to today......
A. 13 April 2013: The break up is still fresh. It is natural to mourn over a break up and a betrayal. Realizing how bad he was does not necessarily speed up the healing process. You are still obsessing about him because even though mentally you know he is no good, ... (read in full...)
Did I say "I'm falling for you" prematurely? We've been dating seriously for 2 months.
Q. I met the guy I am dating initially last summer through a dating site, but since I had a lot going on at the time, I blew him off for the first few months and we didnt actually go on our first date til Secember, it was a perfect date that I could ...
A. 13 April 2013: I don't think so. Maybe buying a garbage can for you is his way of showing he's falling for you too. When you are with a man, actions are more important than words. You shouldn't have to restrict yourself to feel safe in a relationship. You are just ... (read in full...)
I just want to be friends! Guys how do I turn you off FOREVER!; without gaining 100lb, sacrificing looks, nor getting really hairy?
Q. I'm studying computer engineering so it's ALL GUYS and I'm not a hermit or anything, so I try to make friends. And I LIKE having friends I can talk to about nerdy things like Linux and UNIX, I mean, most other people don't get it. But the guys A...
A. 13 April 2013: I don't believe every single guy in your class has feelings for you. You also have to realize not everyone is interested in having friends. A lot of people, like me, do not find a point in conversations if there's nothing practical to it. I am a ... (read in full...)
Is she telling me the truth? Or is she withholding some details? Having trouble trusting if her version is true.
Q. We were both 16 when we met. When I first noticed her, I NEVER thought she would smoke or drink. To my surprise, she told me she started smoking at the age of 12 (social smoker) and went to club and pub at the age of 15. That happened before ...
A. 13 April 2013: There is no universal behavior when it comes to foreplay and sex. Whatever her version is, she cheated on you. She is not a trustworthy character. Even if she's your first sexual partner, first to touch here or there, she still makes it a more ... (read in full...)
He has been texting my ex pretending to be me
Q. A year into our relationship, My boyfriend found out I was seeing someone when we first started dating. I had been seeing this other person for a year and although I liked him he didnt want a relationship. we were more like FWB , i stopped seeing ...
A. 13 April 2013: SVC, I see your point and you are not nuts. If I see an ex FWB and his wife demands clarity and wants to talk to me in order to save their marriage, I would not bother to go. I would think that there are enough problems in their marriage already and ... (read in full...)
He has been texting my ex pretending to be me
Q. A year into our relationship, My boyfriend found out I was seeing someone when we first started dating. I had been seeing this other person for a year and although I liked him he didnt want a relationship. we were more like FWB , i stopped seeing ...
A. 13 April 2013: You should just leave with dignity. He threw you out and by staying with him it's like you are begging for his forgiveness when what he did was much worse. Sometimes people lie to avoid having a confrontation with a highly emotionally charged ... (read in full...)
We can never see each other because my boyfriend is always in trouble!
Q. I just wanna know what's the point of being in a relationship if we can't see each other. Me and my boyfriend been going out for 9 months and he's 16 and I'm 17. He's always on punishment and getting his phone taken, he lives with his dad and he's ...
A. 13 April 2013: You haven't seen him in three months, but you got information that he woke up late, didn't walk the dog, and burnt his food. Did you use email, or skype? He is lazy and irresponsible but being totally grounded at home seems to be a severe ... (read in full...)
Need to move on from FWB situation
Q. I am 53 years old. I met a man 3 years ago after we both were fresh out of divorce. We dated and are good friends with benefits. He has helped me and I took care of him after an accident. I sold my house due to the divorce and he offered me to live ...
A. 7 April 2013: Sex is always greatest when there is a deadline, making you make the most out of it before it's gone. Which means, for this particular guy, a sure way to kill a sex life is to get married. Don't put too much hope on finding a long lasting ... (read in full...)
Is sleeping with your housemate really such a bad idea??
Q. I have been living with a couple of girl room mates or should i say house mates as we do not share the same rooms for a while now. I initially found nothing attractive about them but recently, one of them has been catching my eyes and attentions. ...
A. 7 April 2013: It will be a bad idea when one of you falls for the other, the relationship doesn't work out and you are stuck with each other, possibly watching her bang someone else or her watching you do that to someone else, until the lease ends. The other ... (read in full...)
I was snooping around boyfriend's home and found bags of ladies underwear, sex toys and porno!
Q. While snooping around my boyfriends house I found bags of ladies underware, sex toys and porno movies. I mean several bags! I was shocked. Why did he have these and why would be ever keep them. I can't tell him that I found this stuff because I was ...
A. 7 April 2013: Those are masturbating tools. The combination helps make the experience more real. I don't know what you expect to hear from him. What are you going to do with the knowledge that your man is a perv? Are these deal breakers for you? Is it too much to ... (read in full...)
He disappeared without an explanation. Couldn't he at least explained first?
Q. Iam a 33 year old woman and I have been divorced for about 3 years. About 7 months ago, I met a man online from USA through a dating website. He immediately asked for my number and we got chatting and talking regularly. I am a professional and...
A. 7 April 2013: He didn't disappear and nothing happened to him. He is going on with life as ususal. All you had was a chatting relationship and when it wants to become real he bailed. No one will straight out to tell you, "hey I just want to talk online ... (read in full...)
Is a rebound relationship a good idea? He is my new Bf after my recent breakup. My new Bf recently also broke up with his former Gf.
Q. I just broke up with my boyfriend of three years. About a month ago and I kept joking to one of my guy friends, who is also a friend of my boyfriend, about going on a rebound Then a few days ago when I went over to his place to do some revision,...
A. 7 April 2013: I wouldn't do it because he is your ex's friend. When you truly want to move on you hang out with people outside of your circle to avoid gossips. If you got close to this guy it means you will run into your ex again, which will be awkward. He also ... (read in full...)
What can be done to get her to want me again? And why is she not discouraging her ex from reaching out to her?
Q. My GF and I been dating for 2 years. She's had a very "liberal" sexual past. Threesomes, group sex, other women, etc. We started off very hot and heavy. And after a few months, she moved in late last year. I've noticed over the past few months t...
A. 2 April 2013: I think the only thing you did to cause this is to live with her. Did she care how much money people made when she had those threesomes? I don't think so. If she is shutting down like that, not even kissing and hugging it could mean she is not the ... (read in full...)
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