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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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He's spoken about getting married and our future together, but he isnt sexually attracted to me! What should I do?
Q. So me and my boyfriend have dated for a while now and have been pretty serious. He's started bringing up moving and getting married- I previously got out of an engagement with someone I was with for a few years and it makes me nervous. But wi...
A. 28 January 2013: I believe if you love someone unconditionally, you will love their bodies too. You sound fine to me. A lot of men are not physically my type but I can enjoy sex with a lot of them and I can make them feel wanted. Do you enjoy sex with him? Or must ... (read in full...)
I need advise in how to stay away from this Dr. Jeckell & Mr. Hyde that I love!
Q. Hi, I have been reading past advice on this website on dealing with dating an Italian man. Thank you. I sure could use some more support and advice. I haven't seen him in 30 days and I'm trying to stay away from him. We have been dating for sixteen ...
A. 28 January 2013: A guy like him needs constant narcissistic supply. Stop feeding him that until he's telling you you are too withdrawn and he needs to protect his heart by investing less in the relationship or anything like that blah blah. An effective way to buzz ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is hot and cold...any advice would be helpful!!
Q. my boyfriend and i were dating for a little over a year when he broke up with me saying he didnt want to be in a relationship anymore and that he was unhappy. i was so confused and hurt we never had any major issues between us. i was devastated. ...
A. 28 January 2013: He sounds like a confused person. He was talking about marriage because he wants to convince himself that this is what he wants. He feels bad that deep down inside he does not believe in marriage but at the same time marriage is the right thing to ... (read in full...)
My lazy attitude towards sex annoys my boyfriend
Q. Hi I need some advice please. My partner and I are both 26, he works away and is only home on the weekends and I work part time and an full time in Uni. We have a great relationship and get along fab! The only thing we argue about is.....sex! He ...
A. 28 January 2013: You are having sex once a day. So quantity is not the problem it's not quality. He would prefer you to spice things up. He doesn't want you to have sex as a way to deal with him and placate him. You can initiaite more often so it's not always him on ... (read in full...)
He's spoken about getting married and our future together, but he isnt sexually attracted to me! What should I do?
Q. So me and my boyfriend have dated for a while now and have been pretty serious. He's started bringing up moving and getting married- I previously got out of an engagement with someone I was with for a few years and it makes me nervous. But wi...
A. 28 January 2013: I don't know if he is hinting at open relationships here. A lot of men suggest them, then get upset when the women do have sex with other men. Has he actually said that you are not attractive, or is this your own thinking? Is not being able to have ... (read in full...)
My friends say he's not good enough for me. Am I just blinded by my feelings?
Q. i recently found out that the guy I've been seeing for about 3 months now was flirting/chatting up a bunch of girls (including 2 of my friends) up until about a month ago. i confronted him about it and he seemed really remorseful; i believed him ...
A. 28 January 2013: How could he be so wrong if you were never official to begin with? You lost your virginity to him when you were not too sure where you stood. Right now he seems to want to go towards the direction of a relationship. Why don't you give him a chance ... (read in full...)
Could this really be love at first sight?
Q. For starters I have been single for about a year now... my best friend joined a online dating website fore gits and shiggles. well she found a wonderful guy and they have been together for quite some time.. i got bored about a month ago and thought ...
A. 27 January 2013: I have felt a few love at first sights with apparently attractive men but they are not good indicators of whether a relationship will last. There are indeed creeps out there but most know how to put on the best impression on the first few dates. I ... (read in full...)
So we were kissing for ages on our date and now he's not the same as he was before?
Q. Im 20, a virgin, I've never had a boyfriend, I'm quite inexperienced with guys, I have only dated 2 in the past. So I met this guy at my uni, we both live near campus. We had been talking for a while on WhatsApp, flirting, getting to know ...
A. 27 January 2013: He's interested in testing the waters and in making out. Then he decided he is not ready for another relationship, probably as your friend had said he had been hurt badly. Kissing felt good until the painful images of his ex came flooding in. That's ... (read in full...)
Ran into my ex, now what?
Q. I ran into my Ex at the gym. We both smiled and waved, then he came over and talked to me. I didn't expect that. We tried to be friends and I just found it too hard and eventually I told him I couldn't have him in my life becuase it was too hard ...
A. 27 January 2013: It is hard for him to be in your life, therefore you have to banish him from your mind also. It doesn't matter anymore why he walked up to you. You have already made up your mind that he is out of your life.... (read in full...)
I thought I'd finally met a great guy; now I'm not so sure
Q. Ok I met this guy on a chatline, and he we texted and then he called me and told me that he would provide for me,love me,care for me, and would want to eventually marry me but he works as a tow truck driver. whenever i text him he always tells me ...
A. 27 January 2013: You just chatted with this guy. You have never met in person and he wants to marry you. He is dreaming. Envision him being your husband. He is not prompt with replies, he is always busy and is not serious with his words. He wants to see you on his ... (read in full...)
My ex FWB and I still flirt but now he thinks his g/f is pregnant. I want to help but its painful for me
Q. A few months ago me and a friend ended up admitting we really liked eachother and had a few intimate encounters. However we agreed that due to the fact we are in a band together it would be better if we didn't make it anything serious and he also ...
A. 27 January 2013: He doesn't want to hurt you by getting serious but the fact is he is hurting you because he can never be serious. He wants to think he is sparing you the pain by letting this affair go underground. His logic is skewed.
I don't know what help you ... (read in full...)
Is it a bad idea to apologize to an ex girlfriend?
Q. Hey,i am debating contacting a ex girlfriend just to apologise for my behaviour. My concern tho is i don't want her to think I'm trying become friends with her again or re enter her life,that is not my goal,only apologising.no hidden motives. ...
A. 27 January 2013: It is not a bad idea. I've had an ex who strung me along. I imagine if he apologized to me without the intention of getting back into my pants, I would accept the apology and be happy for him. I think it would help me stop holding grudges for him. ... (read in full...)
Why did he say that he was interested in my mind?
Q. Does he want to get to know me better? I basically asked this guy if he was "interested" in me. After I thought he was flirting with me. I think he was a little surprised by me asking such a blunt question. He smiled and at first asked what I meant ...
A. 27 January 2013: Dating is a process of knowing people, mind, body and spirit. He could be shy. It's his way of showing interest without being too eager for fear of rejection. When he says it doesn't matter if it is courtship or friendship, you have to keep it at ... (read in full...)
My parents are defending my sister after she took my things without even asking!
Q. I am 25 and still living with my parents and youngest sister while I save up for a house deposit. My other sister is a year younger than me and has just moved into a rented flat with her boyfriend. They both came to visit us today and she said she ...
A. 27 January 2013: It's unfortunate that parents do that to children. Do you feel that they favor your sister when you grew up? It is not uncommon. Why they do that I have no idea.
You can express how this made you feel. You don't feel they value your feelings. You ... (read in full...)
Why did he break up with me? I don't understand
Q. Im in love with a guy who has all the character of being a flirty one. He always wanted to go out with me but it wouldnt work out. He ask about my likes and dislikes to my friend. After 3 months he said that lets break up. I asked him why he said ...
A. 27 January 2013: I think he tried to tell you why. You and him are different people. He thinks you will study well and have a good career. Basically doing all the proper things. He on the other hand is a player and has no direction in life. He knows that it won't ... (read in full...)
We both broke up with our partners but I don't know where I stand with him!
Q. Hi please tell me what I should do I met this guy K recently and we had great chemistry. Unfortunately he is moving out of the country and we were both attached! We had a great few days together (no sex) but we felt the connection and talked a lot...
A. 27 January 2013: There is a possibility that he is not broken up with his girlfriend. He could be telling the truth but I wouldn't take that chance. Is a long distance relationship what you really want? The relationship could be on when his girlfriend is away and ... (read in full...)
On off ex boyfriend won't stop contacting me even when I've told him to stop. There's another woman in the picture. What's he playing at?
Q. i was in a relationship with this guy. at first things were okay.. then we started having fights because of various reasons. i had also been talking to my ex - just talking btw... could that have also messed the situation up? ( because he kinda ...
A. 27 January 2013: He is a boomerang and can't stand to be alone. Believe it or not you are one of them to enable this, by taking him back. You have to be the one to completely ban him from calling. The easiest thing is to not pick up the phone. If the other girl does ... (read in full...)
Should I break up with him or find a way to make this relationship work?
Q. Hi!! My bf and I have had a lot of problems in the course of our relationship. He is 22 and I´m 20. We´ve been together for two years, and he has become overly controlling, he tries to control every second of my time, gets angry when I wear somethin...
A. 27 January 2013: I think you stand up for yourself by leaving him and not waiting for him to adapt to this change, as it is apparent that he can't handle a woman with a free will, and with different opinions.... (read in full...)
Move on, but how? Lingering in the past... Guilt?
Q. hi I need help regarding my relationship. Just be fair and honest.. I had been in a relationship with a girl for over 3 years which ended recently but I still think of her. she was my first girlfriend n spending long time really made m...
A. 27 January 2013: The reason why she has one rule for you and one rule for herself is that she is an attention whore. She wants your complete attention and other guys' attention on the side. In case your relationship does not work out she is lining up seconds or ... (read in full...)
What seems to be the problem with this relationship as we argue about many things?
Q. Hi, here's my situation. I'm 19 about to turn twenty and my girlfriend is 17 just about to be 18. We have been together 2 years now. We live 56 miles away, about an hour and 15 minute drive apart. Lately we seem to argue a lot. Everyone of my fr...
A. 26 January 2013: You have a lot to offer but your girlfriend is not that into you. She will play hard to get and whet your appetite just to get a kick out of it. I don't see a lot of argument here. In fact I see that you would rather have a heated talk than the ... (read in full...)
Now I'm in a better place with my life back on track, Should I try to explain to my former friends that I was ill when I did the things that broke up the friendships?
Q. Sorry this is so long but I really need you to see all the facts. I am 27 and I was raped when I was 19. I was living at university at the time, and the man who did it to me was someone I trusted. In fact, at one point I even thought we might have ...
A. 26 January 2013: I was an average person before I dealt with people with PTSD syndrome. I tried very hard to understand them. I would spend hours looking online for stuff like borderline, bipolar and narcissism. I still struggle to forgive people who wronged me. All ... (read in full...)
Was my boyfriend's gesture and behaviour strange in this situation?
Q. Recently my boyfriend (who makes an excellent living) brought me a bouquet of flowers. They were the grocery store variety and the price tag that he left on the cellophane said $7. He came to my front door with said flowers still in the plastic ...
A. 26 January 2013: Safeway has good flowers. I always get them.
It sounds like he bought the flowers just because this is what women like. His gesture was insincere. He is giving it to you at the same time letting you know he doesn't really want to do it.
Would... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is another woman's 'back up guy' in case they're not married by 40! How would you feel about this?
Q. Dear All, How would you act if your boyfriend told you he was another girls back up guy and if there both still 40 they would get married as his rich and reliable? I feel this is disrespectful and it"s upset me but he can't see why? Opinions p...
A. 26 January 2013: Yes it is disrespectful to you. Marriage is like a business transaction to him. The other woman wants to play around until she is too old then she wants to settle down. You are a back up girl when the other woman decides she doesn't want to marry ... (read in full...)
New boyfriend, new problems.
Q. A couple of months after I was dumped by my ex, I began a relationship with Mr New. He's tall and handsome, but the thing that I was attracted to first was how we could talk to one another. This relationship started about a year ago... beginning of ...
A. 26 January 2013: There are two issues in this relationship, when combined together it's just not good. Maybe he is feeling that he is your rebound, and that you got with him to stop the feeling of emptiness. He is controlling. I don't blame you for not feeling in ... (read in full...)
I feel completely heartbroken, I'd accepted that we had broken up but to be lied to repeatedly just for sex?
Q. This all happened within the space of three weeks. So, basically I was in a relationship with this guy for just over two years, we both loved each other but obviously argued occasionally, as people do. One day, he calls me to have a chat, everythi...
A. 26 January 2013: Better be awkward than to be lied to for sex. Some men take advantage of the fact that you still have feelings, and would never think they will be lied to that extent.
Your ex is the reason why traditional women wait until marriage. Nowadays if w... (read in full...)
Ex boyfriend called after 4 years! Do I phone him back?
Q. Today i received a missed call from my ex boyfriend. I haven't seen him since end of 2008! When we were together, i did lend him money (one of the things i regret the most and never do that now!) and i have never got it back. I'm confused why he ...
A. 26 January 2013: Whenever people I don't like contact me, I would expect the subject matter to be money or other things important. Missing you, getting your attention do not count as important. If there is no subject matter you do not contact him back. He could have ... (read in full...)
Is looking at porn the morning after you've slept with your girlfriend, a bit odd and uncalled for?
Q. Would anyone else agree with this? Looking at porn the morning after you've slept with your girlfriend is a bit odd and uncalled for? Why would they want to look at someone else that soon?...
A. 26 January 2013: Usually women like sex at night and not in the morning. Men get hard in the morning because their testosterone levels peak. Your boyfriend probably didn't want to wake you up and ask you. He wanted to take care of it himself quickly. ... (read in full...)
What does friends with benefits mean to you?
Q. I have a question for you lovely people.. Me and my ex stopped talking for a long time all of a sudden he missed me ( so he says) he asked me did I wanna be friends with benefits and told me I can't sleep with nobody but him... What is friends with ...
A. 26 January 2013: FWBs are not always involving multiple people. People can agree to be monogamous even in a casual arrangement. There is less risk to disease. Life is simpler when you deal with one on one. Even when you are not in a committed relationship feelings ... (read in full...)
I have a boyfriend but I like to flirt with other boys. Is this wrong?
Q. Hi everyone. I find myself in a difficult situation. I've just got my first boyfriend, and i really really like him. However i find myself flirting with other guys quite a lot, and i've recently found out that this guy likes me, and starting to ...
A. 26 January 2013: Some people are natural flirts. It is important to know when to stop. You usually stop by saying you have a boyfriend already, then distance yourself from that guy. You are in love with your boyfriend but you will still find other people attractive, ... (read in full...)
Out of the blue he says he loves me but can't be with me. I don't know what happened!
Q. i met this guy on a dating site.we are talking by mails and on the phone before to meet 5 mnths ago.was a romantic trip.after that we met few more times.he wanted me to be a part of his life and share everythings with me.met me with his friends and ...
A. 26 January 2013: He is hiding something. I am guessing a wife. He mentioned not right now because he wants you to wait until his wife will be out of town or something. Maybe he wanted to divorce his wife but then later changed his mind. It could be many reasons but ... (read in full...)
I positively enjoy performing oral sex on my husband. Do other women experience the same thing?
Q. I enjoy and look forward to performing oral sex on my husband. He is shocked by this fact. I tried to explain that it is no different than a sexual position that turns him on or a fantasy he has about me. I want my husband to ask for it. He feels ...
A. 26 January 2013: Yes I like giving oral. I don't care too much about receiving. There is no reason to be shocked. It is my biggest turn on, whether the relationship is marriage or just pure sexual.... (read in full...)
I want my partner to get a job and become a little independent. He is unemployed. Am I handling things the right way?
Q. i have a live in partner for 8 years n0w. Recently,i had my tattoo finished and he was acting like,"i want to get my first tattoo." i replied with,"if you want to have a tatt0o you sh0uld pay f0r it." he has n0 job by the way. I am kind of frank ...
A. 26 January 2013: He is copying a lot here. That's just because he doesn't have a lot of money to buy brand new things. If he likes to copy, then doesn't it make sense that he should be like everyone else and get a job too?
"Go get a job" isn't completely simp... (read in full...)
A weekend away together, he grew cold on the way home and now has totally frozen me out. Why?
Q. I have been seeing this guy for 2 months. Things were going great. Just two weeks ago, during my drive home after hanging out with him, he sent me a text that said, "I think we should take this relationship to a new level, will you be my facebook ...
A. 25 January 2013: Bad relationships in the past is never the reason to treat a new person badly. If they are still bitter, then they should resolve their inner demons, heal, before jumping into another relationship. So they don't dump their negativity onto the next ... (read in full...)
I confronted my husband about flirting with girls and now he has turned cold on me
Q. How can I improve my relationship with my husband?I found out that he was flirting with girls that he termed as just friends,I confronted him,but todate he has completely changed.He treats me coldly,doesnt show any affection,is never interested in ...
A. 25 January 2013: If you knew your husband is that way you would have never married him. He will be that way whether or not you confronted him. He is only upset that he got caught. His ex is targetting the wrong person here. The level of hatred she has shows that ... (read in full...)
Why is she not picking up clues that I like her?
Q. i am really confused on my situation here..i am attracted to a girl..she always treats me as a friend only even though i make her laugh and i be with her to support her in her difficult times and she enjoys a lot when shes with me but even after ...
A. 25 January 2013: You have to show her you like her to ask her out on dates. If you had taken her on a date already it means she only sees you as a friend. Maybe she does not want a relationship for some reason. You have to accept that not every girl will be ... (read in full...)
Some of my husband's actions are making me uncomfortable. He says there's nothing to it. What do I do?
Q. I'm four months pregnant with my first child. Overall, things have been going well in my relationship with my husband. My sex life isn't quite what it used to be, but it's not like we don't have sex at all. (And not because I don't want to!) Over...
A. 24 January 2013: I would suggest you not to use sex to mend the bond. You've had trust issues before you married, that made you look in his phone again. I am not 100% sure he feels guilty about that dream. I am suspicious there is a possibility that he is telling ... (read in full...)
Is a man wearing a women's swimsuit really a 'sexual offense' especially as the man did it drunk at a party?
Q. I have recently found out my 24-year-old daughter is dating a convicted sex offender, she had inadvertently mentioned it when talking about her new boyfriend (he's 32). I feel sick and disgusted but at the sametime am powerless to stop her. She...
A. 24 January 2013: I don't think sexual offenders should get a second chance, so I am with your husband on this one. I don't know what's a saint's and sinner's theme party but he apparently did something out of line, something that's unrelated to the swimwear but very ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend overheard her parents conversation and found out she was not wanted and now she's freaked out and its ruining our relationship!
Q. my girlfriend and I are having a serious crisis!!! We've been going out for over 2 years now and for the most part it's been great. of course we have our little moments but we always have seen it through together. Well now she just found someth...
A. 24 January 2013: A woman who loves too much, does too much will soon lose the appeal. It is a receptive, carefree woman who gets to keep the relationship. She seems to be "happy" with the decision she is making. You have to "agree" with what she is doing now because ... (read in full...)
Why is all this negative thinking taking over me?
Q. Hi I just got done with my final year of university,gave my final exams abt 4 days ago,and now I'm waiting for my results which wouldn't be out in another 3 weeks,I'v been sooo anxious,I get nightmares about it,I can't think straight,its very ...
A. 24 January 2013: Stress is there to help you focus and goads you into working harder. You have to stop your mind and regroup. It takes the brain time to adjust to changes. You are experiencing a crash because you did your best and then there is nothing to do now but ... (read in full...)
A virgin dating a player. I'm scared about having sex with him!
Q. Hey everyone, I'm dating a well known business man of my city,and even before I knew him I'd read about how he's a player and is not really looking for a relationship,I never ever thought for the life of me I'd date him some day!so when I got into...
A. 24 January 2013: If he doesn't want to be with you after sex that's not because of lack of experience. It's because he got what he wanted and he still doesn't want a relationship. You don't know if he loves you, so you shouldn't have sex with him. He went from ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend refuses or is incapable of loving me
Q. I love my boyfriend, But he doesn't know. He doesn't believe in being in love or falling in love, he actually hates the phrase "Falling in love", he doesn't think its real. We say all the time we like each other. But its killing me because I love ...
A. 24 January 2013: Are you living as roommates now or does his actions say he loves you? Have you visited each other's parents, gone on a trip together? What are his views on marriage and children? I believe you need these before exchanging I love yous. ... (read in full...)
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