Like what
she writes?
... Add *ensible Alice to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *ensible Alice a private message | | | *ensible Alice's profile:Hi I'm Sensible Alice,
I'm a wife, mother, cancer survivor, aspiring novelist and hopeless romantic. My advice is given purely out of the desire to be helpful, using common sense, life experience, compassion and humour where appropriate, LOL. It is not intended to offend or be taken in place of medical or professional advice.
*PS I'll let you guess as to my age. After all, a girl has to have some secrets, don't you agree? |
|
He's safe, respectful, but sometimes that doesn't seem enough
Q. I've been dating a guy on and off for a year now that is sweet, patient - I've cheated a couple times while we were in an "off" point in the relationship... :/ - and loving. However, I feel like I have to tell him directly everything I want in the ...
A. 19 December 2014: It's never a good thing in a relationship when you hope they will change. Sometimes in the most extreme circumstances they do, but most don't. Are you willing to stay with him in the hope that he will become what you need? It's hard for you to ... (read in full...)
He's never made me reach orgasm!
Q. Hi, I have a problem and I think it's really superficial but it's driving me mad. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years and he's everything I could ask for except he's never made me reach orgasm. Also, he has an incredibly low sex ...
A. 19 December 2014: Orgasm during intercourse, like anything, has to be learned. Cleo and Cosmo often have articles on how to or you can research online. Foreplay for a woman is usually a must, but unfortunately for young men, too much giving of this makes them ... (read in full...)
I'm a cheater trapped in a sexless marriage and my wife has cancer. I'm at a breaking point here...help me please!
Q. My wife and I have had a sexless marriage since shortly after marriage in 2003. This made me feel alone and unwanted so I started cheating to fill this void. Everything else in our relationship was fine and we had two children within a few years. ...
A. 19 December 2014: The pain and helplessness leaps out of your post. You clearly love your wife and are in a sad situation. I don't think anyone can ever really understand how desperate one begins to feel until they are in a sexless marriage. Being constantly pushed ... (read in full...)
I want more than an ordinary life, but my husband is very ordinary
Q. Hard to know where to start and I'm going to try not to waffle on for hours.... In a nutshell I have been with my partner 3.5 years, married in August (so married for about 4 months now). For the majority of the relationship it has been happy, ...
A. 19 December 2014: At the moment you're all over the place and you need space and time to decide what you want. Start by telling your husband how you feel. Perhaps you both might decide to separate for a short while. The time apart should give you some indication ... (read in full...)
He kicked me out because I cheated. Will he take me back?
Q. I have been with my my boyfriend for a little over two years. This week I had went behind his back and hung out with my ex, my ex would call me beautiful and do little gestures like put his hand on my leg while driving grab my butt randomly and open ...
A. 19 December 2014: What a sad situation!The real shame in all this is that it took this one mistake with your ex to see that you really did love your boyfriend. Give him some space and take the time to think about what you want to do. You might decide it better to ... (read in full...)
I am boring my husband, how do I get the fun back?
Q. Hi cupids, I'm after some advice on how to "re-attract" someone's attention. My husband and I have been together for 17 years, married for 5 years. We have 2 beautiful sons. The problem is that I feel like he is not interested in me anymore...
A. 19 December 2014: I think many married couples will admit that over time they grow apart, stop spending so much time together and start taking each other for granted. The fact that you've become aware of this and want to change it is great. Setting a date night would ... (read in full...)
We've not dated or had sex but he said he would leave his wife for me!
Q. Hi guys, I'm in such a pickle and I wish I didn't have this to worry over right before Christmas. Me and my partner have been together for six years, happy years and I love him dearly. My partners boss is 14 years older than myself and ...
A. 19 December 2014: There's no denying that the pair of you are attracted to each other and that there's chemistry. For years this has stayed within bounds and neither of you have acted on it. But suddenly he's overstepped the mark by sending that email. Could it be ... (read in full...)
We broke up but she says she still loves me and I want her back!
Q. There is this girl and I made the wrong choice an dumped her. I really want her back. I sent her texts saying I want my "ex" back implying her. She got mad an now will not talk to me. She said she loved me though. How do I get her back?...
A. 7 April 2014: I'm wondering what brought you to the decision to dump her in the first place. Was it thought out? Did you have your eye on someone else and they've since shown disinterest in you? Or have you really truly come to the conclusion that that you have ... (read in full...)
I am in love with his brother, help?
Q. I am 20 years old and have been in a relationship with this guy for nearly 4 /2 years, I dont know if I feel the same about him like I used to, sex doesn't work anymore and I feel as though the spark has gone. However a few months back I got drunk ...
A. 7 April 2014: Definitely end it with your current guy. You've come to the stage where what has been there is no longer there. I hate to sound unkind, but it does not seem to me that you love him. As for what happened with his brother, it might be wise to leave ... (read in full...)
I don't have much faith in long term relationships. Any advice?
Q. I've come here because I have this mental hurdle that I can't seem to overcome even though I do want to... I'm 18 and I don't have much faith in long term relationships...I have been through a few long relationships that failed, one in which wa...
A. 7 April 2014: Your trust and faith has been broken by a string of bad relationships, it's understandable you feel as you do. But I think your greatest achievement - and many women don't ever feel this way - is that you've gained independence and you KNOW you ... (read in full...)
What do people think of Facebook and people who post endless photos of their children?
Q. Good evening everyone, I have a friend on Facebook - I do know her in the "real" world - who is posting endless photos of her children. Her little girl is maybe 5 or 6 years now and her new baby boy is under 1 year. I find it very odd that sh...
A. 6 April 2014: For some people FB is the only way you can share what is going on in your life. Unfortunately, FB is not only made up of our relatives, and the posts get seen by all our friends, close and not so close. I can understand your concern, as I've heard ... (read in full...)
I've lost interest in my husband but I feel trapped because we've been together for so long
Q. I've been married for 23 years and have 3 grown up children, so for the last 3 years I haven't had sex with my husband. I miss having sex yet I don't fancy my husband anymore. He has a low sex drive anyway and he has let himself go, putting on 3 sto...
A. 6 April 2014: There are so many women in your age bracket who would echo back, "I hear you!" Men's testosterone levels drop after the age of forty and they go through a male menopause which can cause a host of unfavourable symptoms and moods; depression, ... (read in full...)
We've talked for a while, should I ask her to hang out sometime?
Q. Hi Cupids, I am here to ask for reassurance again because this site is an awesome resource for relationship advices. Very long read I have written here, I wish I can write better. I am 21 yrs. old, never had a girlfriend up to a kiss. I am a ...
A. 5 April 2014: If you want to ask this girl out 'just to hang out', make sure you add "just as friends", then you both know where you stand. That way you can get to know her and see if she's someone you'd like to date. You might even it easier to ask her on a real ... (read in full...)
I have a problem with my long distance relationship.
Q. I'll include the story of how this relationship came to be, just in case it helps. Last year in October a friend of mine added the most wonderful girl I've ever known into a Skype conference call. We immediately noticed things we had in common a...
A. 5 April 2014: It sounds like you two had a wonderful time in January. Twenty years ago that might have been classed as a summer romance, two people meet and have an amazing time together, then part, still thinking fondly of the other and calling and writing now ... (read in full...)
Insecure with my ugly body, will I ever get a boyfriend?
Q. Basically I've been an emotional eater and very lazy over the years and have really let myself go and stopped caring about my body. This is very pathetic I know, especially because I'm a young woman. I am so insecure about my body I don't think I ...
A. 2 April 2014: It's very hard to care for someone who doesn't care for themselves. It's difficult to want to be seen with someone who has no pride in themselves. But just because you're obese doesn't mean you need to give up on either of those things. You can be ... (read in full...)
He said we couldn't go on, but I'm getting mixed messages
Q. I'm feeling so confused... I was in a relationship for the past two years. We had loads of problems, it was the kind of relationship people knew was not going to last, but we loved each other so much... However, our disagreements took their toll ...
A. 2 April 2014: If this guy cared and wanted to be with you, he'd ditch his girlfriend to give the both of you a chance. Does he just want an affair? Do you? Do you want to continue to be the other woman? What happens when his girlfriend finds out? Are you ready ... (read in full...)
Feeling fed up. Job going no where. Haven't met "The One". Has anybody experienced this situation and have any advice?
Q. Hi everyone, just looking for a bit of advice. I'm 26 and just feeling really fed up with life. I spent 5 years in uni and trained as a teacher but I currently work as a sales manager. I didn't love teaching and jobs were few are far between ...
A. 28 March 2014: Despite what you may feel, you're in a really good life position at the moment. You're young and unattached and I'm assuming you don't yet have any debts or mortgage. Frankly I bet there are a million people who'd love to be in your shoes. Basically ... (read in full...)
My ex and I made each other miserable, but we had a spark I don't feel with my current boyfriend!
Q. I was completely in love with someone a while back. Person B. It was the first time I had ever fallen for someone, and It was insanely intense. One thing lead to another and we ended it. While we were a rather passionate couple, we made eachothe...
A. 27 March 2014: No matter how nice your current boyfriend is, or considerate, if the spark is not there, it's just not there. Would it be fair to continue, hoping the attraction will grow and perhaps end up with regrets and resentment? You haven't given any ... (read in full...)
Do folk think the likes me or not? How can I show him I am interested ?
Q. Hi, I'm feeling confused over a man I have knew for a few months. He blows hot and cold! I see him once a week at church, Some weeks he is great around me and comes up to me and chats away, putting his arm around me,rubs my arm, flirts ect a...
A. 26 March 2014: I read somewhere that these days people are mistaking good manners and friendliness for flirting, so I wonder if this could be the case here. Maybe observe him to see if he is being friendly to others in the congregation (not just women), perhaps he ... (read in full...)
It's the perfect relationship, except I don't orgasm easily except with oral, and he just doesn't like it. What do I do?
Q. I am in a relationship with the perfect man. He is very respectful, sweet, caring, treats me like i am a queen. He is successful, has his head on straight, independent, and I trust him with my world. And of course I am extremely physically attracted ...
A. 26 March 2014: Is there any physical reason why you can't orgasm through intercourse, eg, painful penetration etc? If not, then you need to understand that only a very small percentage of women actually orgasm through intercourse and even then it may have to be ... (read in full...)
Feels like no one is genuinely excited about our engagement. There are challenges. What can I do to cope with it all?
Q. It feels like no one is genuinely excited about my recent engagement. I've been dating a wonderful man for about 6 months and he recently proposed. We are in a long distance relationship, and there are a lot of challenges to us being together-t...
A. 25 March 2014: First of all, congratulations! You're one of the lucky ones to have a second chance at love. I can see why your friends and family are concerned and you sound a little concerned too. You have a lot of obstacles to overcome - but doesn't every ... (read in full...)
I don't even know his name :(
Q. I'm looking for some advice on how to best get in touch with a guy I like. Basically I met him through teaching an exercise class. I'm the instructor and he's a participant. Please don't judge me here and think I use my job to meet guys, I don...
A. 25 March 2014: The brief message you sent him on the dating site sounds friendly and ambiguous and unless it was more detailed and ended in a blatant, "get in touch with me if you're interested," I can't see why he would reply. It is possible he has a girlfriend, ... (read in full...)
Since starting my new job I feel like I'm thick. I want to improve, please help!
Q. I've been feeling really down. After graduating from uni I finally landed a full time job. Not something too challenging but with opportunities.. Until I found out I can't even do the simple things. From day one I always felt the managers were ex...
A. 25 March 2014: It does sound like you've been thrown in the deep end without much consideration given to training. It might be an easy job, but it's being made harder by the fact that you aren't sure what you need to be doing. The only way to find out is to see ... (read in full...)
When is it going to be my turn in dating?
Q. Hi, Well, here I am, a 25 year old woman and I have never had a relationship with a man, in all these years have never even held a man's hand. I don't know what I can do to improve my lot in life, because I feel completely rejected by the entire m...
A. 24 March 2014: First of all, let me reassure you that you're not the only woman that's been passed over for a leggy blonde, LOL. Hands up who hasn't. How did you feel in that new dress and heels? Did you feel sexy and confident or anxious and uncomfortable? We can ... (read in full...)
I'm 25 and afraid its too late for me to find love
Q. Hey everyone....so it has happened again, broke with my forth boyfriend. It took me two years to get over my third boyfriend but this time we broke up like 5 days ago and I am fine. In fact I am ready to jump back in dating scene. But my worry is t...
A. 23 March 2014: I agree that these men might feel being with you intimidating. You're educated, attractive, successful and independent. Some men could find that emasculating. The fact that you're ok and ready to date five days after breaking up with a guy tells me ... (read in full...)
How should I apologize to him? I wrongly listened to a manipulative ex-friend. He was not in the wrong.
Q. Hi there. I have never felt this guilty in my life before, which is why I want to seek help here. So, there is a guy in my new organization who likes me. It's been only a month now, when I joined a new job. He is different in all the ways. He comes...
A. 23 March 2014: It's clear to me that your 'friend' liked that guy and was jealous that he liked you. In an effort to stop the interest between you two she's told some lies which you unfortunately believed and because of that you insulted this guy - at work, in ... (read in full...)
Do I keep my feelings to myself? Or tell her that I like her?
Q. There is a girl that I really like. She is kind, caring, extremely intelligent, very hard working. I had asked her out when I first met her to get to know her but she turned me down because she had a boyfriend. The reason I wanted to get to...
A. 23 March 2014: Find out if she and this other guy are finished first, to save yourself any embarrassment. You could just say, "So, are you and... still going together?" or perhaps ask someone who might know. I'd say she already has an inkling that you're ... (read in full...)
My crush has become more attentive. Is it possible she likes me now?
Q. Hi I have a crush on a younger girl at work. I'm 30, and I'd guess she's maybe 22 or 23. A while back (maybe a year and a half), there was a night out and I stupidly told people I liked her, despite the fact we had barely even spoken beyond ve...
A. 23 March 2014: Yeah it does sound like she might be interested, but the only way you'll know for sure is if you ask her out. Find out if she's unattached first( work colleagues should be able to tell you this). If you're not comfortable asking her on a date, maybe ... (read in full...)
I hate seeing this woman hurt and string my friend along. Is there anything I can do to help her?
Q. I need some advice. I have a friend who I am really close to. We share a lot with each other and have the type of friendship where we can speak openly. Recently she told me that she felt she could always come to me with a problem because I was ho...
A. 23 March 2014: In a situation like this it's hard to know what to do, huh? You have your suspicions and you want to be a good friend, but if you do say something and you're wrong, you risk your friend being upset for nothing - or worse, pushing her away. With some ... (read in full...)
He stopped talking about this female coworker, what does this mean?
Q. Ever since my husband had learned his younger female coworker was getting a divorce, it was non-stop talk about her for a good year and a half. I would hear she is attractive, why would someone divorce a beautiful woman like her. I would hear ...
A. 20 March 2014: There could be many reasons why he's stopped speaking of her. She could have gotten a boyfriend. Perhaps your husband is trying to forget about her and is making an effort not to mention her. While your husband may find this woman attractive, she ... (read in full...)
Why is he so quiet around me?
Q. Im a teenager and So here is a guy in my class that sits next to me. well hes a popular guy in my school amd hes flirty and an outgoing guy wiyh girls and others. but when hes around me he just seems to be super quiet and shy. and when ever i talk ...
A. 18 March 2014: It might be possible he likes you or is worried about what you think of him. It could be that you intimidate him. He can clown around with everyone else, but might feel you'd consider it childish if he did that with you. Maybe he wants to make a ... (read in full...)
Could my crush like me?
Q. so the story goes likes this: on my first day at university i saw this guy on the bus and i immediately thought he was cute.but i soon forgot about him. on another random day at uni i saw this guy again, and this time i saw him enter the of...
A. 18 March 2014: Sometimes we are just so enamoured with a person we start romanticising them in our head, putting scenarios there that aren't there yet. You like this guy. He's just met you. He could very well come to like you in the future. He might like someone ... (read in full...)
Have any women on here gone to a bar alone?
Q. I have been on my own for a long time now. It has been bothering me for a while but it has only become a problem recently. I don't have particularly great coping skills and feelings of loneliness have become overwhelming. I really need to make some ...
A. 15 March 2014: Don't wait for people to talk to you. Be the one to speak first. All it takes is "Hello". Or even a smile. The next time you're heading to the gym, make it your goal to speak to one new person. Say hello or ask how their training is going. While ... (read in full...)
I feel like my dreams are dying ...
Q. I'm 29... finding myself and becoming skilled at something... discovering my talent or passion... if it was going to happen, it would have happened by now? I feel like my dreams are dying, because I don't have any special talent or quality to de...
A. 15 March 2014: It's obvious to me that music is your passion. You do it because you love it, not necessarily because you want to be famous, right? The only person's expectations you have to live up to are your own. You know your limitations. Just because you'll ... (read in full...)
I know he is not sincere but can't get him out of my mind!
Q. Hello. My problem is that i would like to put this man out of my mind but however hard i try, i constantly see him at work. In the beginning i nnoticed that he was always fixing me when i pass near his office. He wwill always be there when i come in ...
A. 15 March 2014: You're unsure if he's sincere in his interest of you and this concerns me too. Could he be the type of man that chases women in a workplace environment purely to entertain himself? Will he do this with every other woman who comes into the office? Or ... (read in full...)
Why am I pushing this good man away?
Q. I have been dating a man for 6 months. Everything has been great. He's very sweet, very gentle, and would do anything for me. I find myself pushing him away within the past few weeks, distancing myself for no reason....picking small fights, turning ...
A. 15 March 2014: I can only toss a few theories into the pot as to what is causing you to behave like this. Is this a recurrent thread with your relationships? Do you push men away when they get too close? Or is it that you're bored with this man, perhaps not as ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend and a friend of mine openly flirt in front of me!
Q. Ok so i have a situation where my girlfriend and a friend of mine are openly flirting in front of me. Now when i say flirting i dont mean anything so blatant where i could say to either of them come on your taking the piss but a situation where if ...
A. 14 March 2014: There's flirting and then there's bantering. I'm hoping in your case it's the latter. I've seen this situation a lot and even been guilty of it at times. There are certain people who you can banter with, you know, talk teasingly to and have a laugh ... (read in full...)
I need help as my godmother spirals out of control!
Q. Hi everyone, I need help as my god mother spirals out of control! My godmother and my parents have know each since they were 14. My mum and dad were dating and my godmother and her partner were dating. My dad and her husband were best man fo...
A. 13 March 2014: What you can do is find out about support groups for friends and family of alcoholics. They will give you tips on how to best manage this situation. ... (read in full...)
Has he been leading me on, and if so, what should I do now?
Q. I have been talking to a guy I really like for about 2 months now. He always texts me first every single day and calls me a lot, and we talk for hours. He has taken me on a couple dates and he says he really likes me, and he compliments me a lot. I ...
A. 13 March 2014: First of all, when I read what he'd written I thought it might be lyrics, seeing as he plays guitar. It's not unusual for people to sometimes even quote lyrics from a song. But the only way you'll know is by asking. You could start by saying ... (read in full...)
Why do the guys I get close to only see me as a friend?
Q. I've been friends with this guy for quite a while now and I've never imagined myself falling for him. He's really fun to hangout out with and our conversations never gets boring we also share the same interests. We always joke around about us being ...
A. 13 March 2014: I apologise in advance here if I offend you, because that's not what I intend at all. I'm just wondering if you're a girly girl or more of a tomboy? The reason I ask is that I've a girlfriend who hung around with mainly boys, could speak their speak ... (read in full...)
| *ensible Alice's friends
These are mutual friends, so *ensible Alice has
added them and they have added *ensible Alice!
|
