A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I "think" I am developing feelings for a guy online.. There's obviously a few issues with that other than the very obvious one of it been an "online" friendship but also he lives in America... I again think the feeling is mutual but have no idea what to say or do about it for starters, secondly it's a VERY complicated situation other than the obvious complications mentioned lol but I'm still not sure if he likes me the way I like him, some signs are like he's told me I'm beautiful, he likes my jokes and we have a laugh together, when I've asked him to recommend music to listen to he's asked me to listen to 'skillet - saviour' and 'Deftones - diamond eyes' He always makes an effort to speak to me if and when I'm online.. He tells me things about himself ect BUT never really asks anything personal about me... So I'm confused! Please help me figure this out! Also if it does turn out we're feeling the same then what the hell do we do about it? :( Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2013): You are getting yourself caught up in a fantasy, not reality. Look, this is a person on-line...they could be anybody, and you can be anybody....don't confuse real life meeting in person feelings of attraction and such with words on a computer screen. He's not asking much about you because he is more interested in talking about himself then anyone else....a self-centered lad. Be careful what kind of information you are giving out about yourself voluntarily...just be careful.I would suggest getting out and meeting people in real life and people who live in your area and start a healthy relationship with someone who can share a life with you, not a life on a computer screen. Best of luck to you!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI know I'm jumping the gun a bit with my last comment but it's just the case of 'what if's' still at this point anyway! I've not spoke to him in 2 weeks because I can't and what's got me thinking all this is the fact that I genuinely can't stop thinking about him..
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIf there was a guy closer to home I'd probably be out dating him already :) that said I know you can form lasting genuine friendships at least in line I've had a very good female friend from south Africa travel here to meet me! I've also met several great people from online who I've maintained strong lasting friendships with over 7+ yrs. so just because he's far away doesn't mean it can't happen, the only difficulty is he has a child from
A previous relationship and so do I, I would never want to take my children away from their father to make myself happy and that's the only genuine issue I can see preventing taking things further, I wouldn't want him to never see his child either because it wouldn't be fair on her!
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (2 February 2013):
 Hi
He's across the world, he's merely a person you chat to, a friend.Leave it like that.Chat if he's there, don't worry if he isn't. Keep it light.
Think of the qualities you like in him,why you like him, and find a guy closer to home that has the same.
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A
female
reader, R1 +, writes (2 February 2013):
 America is so far away! I feel like you could be setting yourself up for something really hard! Not that long distance can't work but you really don't know someone till you meet them face to face.
This is just my opinion though and of course you should follow your heart and do what's right for you.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (2 February 2013):
 Sometimes you can have feelings but can't do anything about it because of the distance. Some people are just content about being long distance pals because it allows them to express feelings, practice communicating with the opposite sex without the fears of rejection that comes with real life dating. You should straight out ask him if he intends to meet sometime but don't be disappointed if his answer is not positive. There are varieties to feelings. You have never met him or touched him so your feelings will be limited. We can be attached to a source that is constant, daily and that brings us comfort but to develop a real relationship you need to meet at least once a week in person.
Before you talk about feelings, something that can't be analyzed and can be complicated, ask him what he thinks about long distance relationships and if he has plans for travelling. Ask yourself why, even if you have feelings for each other, that you want to travel to him and what does he have that British guys don't? If your feelings are so strong that you want to make it real you will see how futile online friendships are.
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