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... Send *irtball a private message | | | *irtball's profile:Hello DC. Some of you may be wondering where I were I went. My life has taken a turn that has taken me away from here for the time being. I'm not really answering many questions at this time. If you PM me, I will respond, but it may be delayed a week or two. I had many problems dumped on me of my own, so I don't have much energy for the problems of others. I'll be back, but it just may be a while.
Wow, been away longer than anticipated. To sum it up, life sort of sucks for me at the moment. Not looking for pity, just letting you know why I haven't been around. I still hope things will get better soon, but who knows.
ALERT: If you're sending me a PM in regard to advice I've given you, please reference the thread or specifics so I can be on the same page. Lately I've been receiving lots of PM's with an answer to some question I asked, but since the question was from an Anon poster, I have no idea which answer it was in regard to. I give a lot of advice here, so I'm very sorry if I don't immediately recognize you. The question title or a link would be most appreciated. Thank you!
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Hi, I'm the bad bad charming sweetheart dirtball. Although recently I seem to have picked up the moniker "Dirty Balls" despite making sure to clean them thoroughly each day. Anyway, I love this site. I have a BA in Psychology which is part of the reason I think I like this site so much. I posted anon for quite some time before creating my profile. I took to the brutally honest approach which has gotten me in trouble a few times, but for the most part has gone quite well. I enjoy helping people and at times challenging them when I think it is appropriate.
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I've been getting lots of great feedback on my advice and I appreciate it, even if you didn't like it. With that said, I'd like to add a segment here I'll call (drum roll please)
DIRTBALL'S RULES ABOUT PEOPLE AND DATING (in no particular order)
Men don't befriend women who they are not interested in sexually. What do I mean by this? I mean that men will not actively seek out friends of the opposite sex unless they would like to make the friendship progress further at some point. Plain and simple, that's how we operate. Are there circumstances where they are actually just friends? Yes, those would be times when you are forced together in some way. Examples could be; fellow employees at work, a regular customer at work, shared friend circle. The key to watch for is if he looks to spend time with her alone. That's usually the sign that he has a romantic interest in the relationship.
Long Distance Relationships don't work. Go ahead and tell me your success stories, I don't care. Most of the time it is just way too hard for the parties involved. Too much doubt creeps into the relationship. Plus, can you really call it a relationship if you only get to be together rarely? I think not.
Once broken up, you should stay that way. Make up/break up relationships don't work. Why do you always feel the need to break up? It's because things aren't working. Then you miss each other and get back together, only to have the very thing that drove you apart last time do it again. It is a cycle that doesn't get better. All you're doing is preventing yourself from finding someone who will actually make you happy.
People only change if they really (and I mean REALLY) want to for themselves. Changes for the benefit of others are temporary. True change is very hard to make. It requires diligence, effort, and support.
Communication is the most important part of your relationship. So many times we have people here asking about how they should handle a situation when the solution is simply to talk to your partner about it. We forget how important this is. It affects everything. If you are feeling upset about something, it is best that you discuss it with your partner instead of burying it and letting it brew. Later it will explode when it could have just been a calm discussion if addressed right away. Communicate with your partner. If you never talk, why are you even together?
People can love each other and not be right for a relationship. This kind of goes back to the make up/break up rule from earlier but it extends to present partners or exes as well. When someone is part of your life, especially for long periods of time, it is natural that part of the love you carry for them will always be there. Just because you love someone though, that doesn't mean you should be together. That's the case with most of my ex GF's as I'm sure it is with many other people. Sometimes you need to consider if love is making you do foolish things.
You should set ground rules in your relationships. Let your partner know about deal breakers. Deal breakers being defined as things they would do that would cause you to end the relationship. It is good to get these out of the way when you are getting serious. That way, you can refer back to them if your partner does something against said ground rules. An example that I tell all my girlfriends (including friends who I'm not romantically involved with) is that I will never answer the question "Am I fat" or any variation of it (does this make me look fat, does my butt look big, etc). I explain why too. It's a trap question. Answer yes, and that's obvious. Answer no, and "you're just saying that." So I won't entertain that question. I know, silly, but this works for the bigger picture too. Figure out what's important enough to you that you'd be willing to end a relationship. Tell your partner what these things are. If they want to be with you, they should know.
When one person in a relationship has a problem, it's a problem for the relationship. You're not alone in your relationship, and dismissing your partner's problem doesn't solve anything. It makes them feel devalued and unimportant. Why don't you care enough to address something they think is a problem? It's because you know it's a problem but want to hide. Don't hide from it. If you do, it won't go away.
When a relationship ends, you need to give yourself proper time to grieve it. Like dealing with death, you go through the same stages. Denial, anger, depression, bargaining, and finally acceptance. This is part of the problem with rebound relationships. Take the time you need. Don't be afraid to wait.
Let the past be the past. It's over, it's done, and there is nothing that can be done to change it. There is no use dwelling on it because there is nothing that can be done about it. Don't worry about things that cannot be changed. You can't drive a car by only looking in the rear view mirror.
I'm sure there will be more to come, but these are the few I've seen myself repeat a lot in my rather short time here.
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This is, hands down, the best conversation I've seen about porn yet on this site: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-is-there-no-middle-ground-when-it.html
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Dirtball Rants:
1) What the hell happened to punctuation and grammar? I blame text messaging for the trash I see people write. It's not the content but the way it's expressed that makes me wonder what's happening to society. I realize that we're a multinational forum here, and I give a complete pass to someone who is doing their best despite the fact that English isn't their first language. But the crap I see from Americans, the British, Canadians, and Australians often makes me sick. If any of you read this, your posts would be much easier to read if you used paragraphs, sentences with punctuation, and whole words instead of abreviations like U, cuz, or wut! Quit being so fucking lazy if you want help.
2) There is a difference between the words your and you're. "Your" denotes ownership. "You're" is the contraction of "you are." Saying something like "your lame" is wrong wrong wrong! The same goes for there, their, and they're. "There" is used for things like places (look over there). "Their" denotes ownership (they wanted their cookies back). "They're" is the contraction of "they are." An example, "they're going to the service station over there to pick up their car which was just repaired." I bet that just blew your mind.
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Abreviations.
I use a lot of abreviations when I type advice so I'm going to start a list of the most common ones I see for use as a reference tool.
OP - Original Poster, the person asking for advice.
BF - Boyfriend
GF - Girlfriend
SO - Significant Other, your BF, GF, Fiance, or spouse in other words.
BTW - By the way
FWIW - For what it's worth
TBH - To be honest
IDC - I Don't Care
IDK - I Don't Know
IMHO - In My Humble Opinion
IMO - In My Opinion
IOW - In Other Words
THO - Titty Hard On (erect nipples) |
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He fathered a child to another woman
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My fiance walked out on me over a disagreement?
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Good luck in your conversation. Do it right and he won't feel insecure.... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my girlfriend's irrational behavior?
Q. Yesterday my girlfriend and I had another fight and she provoqued me by saying she had no money to buy the plane ticket so I should be the one doing it. I did it. When she saw I could do it she started to play victim saying that she didn't want to ...
A. 19 January 2011: You've got to quit being a victim and help yourself. You can do it if you try.... (read in full...)
Our sex life isn't what it should be!
Q. im 25 and my bf is 39 so far we have a good relantionship but im concern about our sex life hes sex drive isnt where i would like it to be i wanted to know do men at that age not geet in the mood to have sex as much...and how can i get hem to want ...
A. 19 January 2011: A text? Really? Is that really the way you think is best to handle this?
I'm with Cerberus. A text message or phone call is not the way to have this conversation. Face to face is the only way.... (read in full...)
He ended the relationship because he doesn't want to waste my time!
Q. I have been with my partner for almost two year, really happy, believe he is the one for me. But unfortunately he doesn't know if he wants to get married or have children, and doesn't want to wast my time as he knows that is what I want. He ended ...
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What is wrong with him, if he wants me back, why does he keep doing this stuff in my house?
Q. Maybe I'm crazy, but I always thought there was an unwritten rule that its wrong to get with one of your ex's friends. My boyfriend and I have been broken up officially for almost a year, but after six months we got back together and were seeing ...
A. 18 January 2011: Well OP, it means he's an idiot. Him thinking you wouldn't find out is about the lamest excuse ever. If he was trying to get you back, he failed. At least he should have. Move on to someone who isn't a dumbass.... (read in full...)
He ended the relationship because he doesn't want to waste my time!
Q. I have been with my partner for almost two year, really happy, believe he is the one for me. But unfortunately he doesn't know if he wants to get married or have children, and doesn't want to wast my time as he knows that is what I want. He ended ...
A. 18 January 2011: This was his way of telling you he doesn't want those things with YOU, so you should move on.
Being friends with an ex doesn't work, especially when you still have feelings for him. You need to cut him out of your life so you can move on. It'... (read in full...)
My fiance walked out on me over a disagreement?
Q. my fiance just walked out on me because I don't agree with him only paying 300 month in work trade after we are married. I own my house (1000 plus utility's) and he would have no right's to my estate. He also said I would have to pay him money if he ...
A. 18 January 2011: What? He's saying you should pay him to live with you? No, that's not how marriage works. Are you doing a prenup? Most states are marital property, so the minute you get married, half the house is his anyway. You might want to look into that.
... (read in full...)
Guy at my girlfriend's work troubles me
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Q. Hey guys, Not asking for like real explicit stuff, don't wanna get banned haha, just a few ideas would be great. Basically, sometimes my boyfriend will finger me but first he will 'tease' me. All it is really is him well rubbing me over my clot...
A. 18 January 2011: What he does to you will work on him too.
Other good teases are sitting on his lap and being kind of wiggly while kissing (if you catch my drift). Or kissing his neck, or rubbing his leg and working your hand up his thigh...
There's lots ... (read in full...)
He fathered a child to another woman
Q. I have been in a wonderful new relationship for 3 months with someone i have known for many years and we were best friends, we didnt get it together before because of past relationships we were in. We just found out a girl he had a one nighter wi...
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How do I stop myself from regretting losing my virginity after its done?
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A. 18 January 2011: How do i enjoy myself and not worry about the emotional consequences??
You can't. Especially since you said you're a sensitive person.
Can i do this with a virtual stranger?
Can you and should you are two different questions. Yo... (read in full...)
Aim low and score high
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A. 18 January 2011: You got lucky. What does this have to do with relationships?... (read in full...)
Away boyfriend is convinced other guys hit on me when that's not the case!
Q. My boyfriend is a Marine and gets extremely jealous even at the thought of another guy flirting with me. We are many states apart and I obviously have the occasional worry of girls hitting on him. However, he takes it to another level. He is ...
A. 18 January 2011: "Is this because he distrusts me?"
Not just you, he doesn't trust anyone. Especially other men.
"Or is it because he is genuinely concerned of losing me to another guy while he's away?"
It's more of a control issue. He wants to be in contr... (read in full...)
How do you get rid of a video on youtube that someone else uploaded?
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A. 18 January 2011: Hmm, this may be a better question for a lawyer. Obviously, only a few people should have access to this if it was done so long ago. Do you have any way to contact those people. You could always write to the person who posted it asking for them ... (read in full...)
My love won't even hold my hand!
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A. 18 January 2011: If you know he really likes you, then he'll just have to get comfortable with the idea. Try in private first and maybe take the hand holding public once he is more comfortable with it. It's good that he's not ripping your clothes off, that shows ... (read in full...)
Every time I push him away he comes back for more!
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A. 18 January 2011: I think he's trying to show you that you can trust him not to leave if the going gets rough. Basically trying to prove his worth to you. If you like him, then give him a chance. The anon poster does make a good point though. If he doesn't ... (read in full...)
After hacking into my husband's facebook account, my gut tells me not to trust him anymore
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A. 18 January 2011: So, why the lies about missing a flight when it was planned ahead of time? Can't you see why there would be a lack of trust when such lies are used?
Sorry OP, I addressed this to your husband since he posted a reply.... (read in full...)
Is my online friend more than just a friend?
Q. Ok, I'll try to be succinct! I'm learning Italian and I met an italian online many months ago through a Language Exchange Website who wanted to improve his english, so we have been engaged in a 'tandem' language exchange since the end of september...
A. 18 January 2011: Communication is the number one indicator of success in a relationship, so it's natural for you to develop feelings for someone with whom you communicate well. It's unclear if these feelings are shared. Many people will stray away from LDR's (long ... (read in full...)
I have a friend with limited benefits
Q. Me and this guy have known each other for a LONG time. We had always talked, hung out, etc... One night I slept over at his house and we started to fool around. I just gave him oral and he liked it. The next day he said he really liked it and asked ...
A. 18 January 2011: Hard to say, but he is likely avoiding you because of his relationship. FWB's usually go bye bye when a relationship comes about. Unfortunately you won't know until he texts you back. ... (read in full...)
Why did my boyfriend get so mad last night?
Q. why did my boyfriend get so mad last night?? maybe because its not true or its true... we dated since 1998 and i want to know why we aren't married.. so i was reading 25 ways to know hes not that into you and he got almost all of them. i let him ...
A. 18 January 2011: Some people simply don't believe in marriage as an institution. The more failed marriages I see, the more I'm in that boat.
Honestly, 12 years together is longer than most marriages these days. You have to decide what you want, and what you want... (read in full...)
Are all men this emotionally frigid?
Q. Are all men this emotionally frigid? I wrote my boyfriend of 3 years a heartfelt letter detailing my doubts about our relationship. I’ve recently moved in with him (and his siblings) and things don’t seem to be working for me, due to a redundancy,...
A. 18 January 2011: Can't generalize for all men. Many of us are not as extreme as your BF in our emotional indifference.
I can say that a letter like that would have upset me if I read it. I'm more in tune with my emotions than the "average" guy though.
Also... (read in full...)
How to stop the vicious cycle of a sexless marriage?
Q. I've read article after article of women who have husbands that are no longer sexually interested in them. I am in the same boat. The details of my situation can be spared because they will only make us sad. I just want to know what happens next? ...
A. 18 January 2011: "He refuses counseling and insists it's only me who has a problem."
Above all else this statement tells us what you mean to him. You're not worth the effort on his end. That's what this means. Why would you want to be with a person who doesn't ... (read in full...)
Guys!! Help! My guy prefers porn and his xbox to real sex... what can I do?
Q. Ok, so my b/f and I have not had sex for a month now. I'm 5.5 months pregnant- but I'm not overweight. I've gained 10lbs and am at 130. The first trimester sex wasn't really something that I felt good about, being nauseous, etc., but now my hormones ...
A. 18 January 2011: When you laid next to him did you do anything to initiate? Contact, kisses, anything other than lay there? Don't get me wrong, if my GF comes in and lays next to me without any clothes on, I'm not thinking video games anymore, but who knows, you ... (read in full...)
She wouldn't remove this ex from her facebook!
Q. my fiance has had a threesome about 10 years ago, the guys is still on her facebook, i feel terrible to look at his pics, when i asked her to remove him, she said that it would not solve the problem, all i wanted to hear is yes, right now this is ...
A. 18 January 2011: Jealous enough over someone from 10 years ago that you'd consider walking away from a marriage huh? You should do her a favor and walk away. You are far too insecure to have a healthy relationship with anyone who has a past.... (read in full...)
Am I setting myself up to be hurt again by her?
Q. There is a woman at my job that I have really fallen for. We started talking as friends last year and sometime in July of last year I looked at her one day and something changed. All she did was look at me and smile. I suddenly wanted to be more ...
A. 18 January 2011: Glad to help out, and thanks for the follow up.
Time to pay attention to that little voice. It's often more right than we want to admit. Good luck.... (read in full...)
My guy friend cut me out of his life but I just cant stop thinking about him!
Q. i still missing my guy friend. He always said I was his best close friend, but after he fell in love to one of our friend, he cut me off completely, from facebook to MSN. He told me he wasn't pushing me away, just between us need distance. All my ...
A. 18 January 2011: Hmmm, I think it may be like the others are saying, but I have an alternative scenario that may also be true.
He liked you. You were more than just a close friend to him. He wanted more, but didn't see things progressing like that. When he ... (read in full...)
What makes a man emotionally attached to a woman?
Q. For the first time ever, I swallowed! Will this make a man appreciate you more? Not that I did it for that reason, but just wondering since I heard that if a female squirts she can become so attached to him. I did this because 1) I like givin my bf ...
A. 18 January 2011: Lots of things contribute, not just the sex. Everything from how we interact, to looks, to just a feeling you get that's impossible to quantify. If you don't want him to get attached, then perhaps it's time to break up. The longer you're ... (read in full...)
What is wrong with him, if he wants me back, why does he keep doing this stuff in my house?
Q. Maybe I'm crazy, but I always thought there was an unwritten rule that its wrong to get with one of your ex's friends. My boyfriend and I have been broken up officially for almost a year, but after six months we got back together and were seeing ...
A. 18 January 2011: Yeah, he definitely doesn't want you back.
Also, hooking up with your friends isn't off limits for him. Why would he care? It's him who should be off limits to your friends. They should be the ones who don't want to hook up with him out of r... (read in full...)
Why doesn't my girlfriend want to tell me if she's a virgin or not?
Q. Hello. I have been dating this girl for almost a month already. I usually spend at least 1 day a week with her because we both go to different schools. I can tell she feels the same way I feel about her. She has told me before that she has had ...
A. 18 January 2011: You've been dating a month. Give her time. This isn't a topic you should be pushing. Well, unless all you care about is sex, because that's what it will prove to her if you do push the issue.... (read in full...)
What shall I do when my wife spends the last night here with her male "friend"?
Q. My wife is going to another country tomorrow for a couple of months. Normally we don't spend much time together because of her job. I stronglly expected we will have a good romantic night today. I told her we will go for dinner tonight, she agreed ...
A. 18 January 2011: To me, it sounds like she's having an affair with this "friend." She has clearly chosen him over you. What you do about that is up to you, but I think you definitely have grounds for not trusting her here. ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my girlfriend's irrational behavior?
Q. Yesterday my girlfriend and I had another fight and she provoqued me by saying she had no money to buy the plane ticket so I should be the one doing it. I did it. When she saw I could do it she started to play victim saying that she didn't want to ...
A. 18 January 2011: Cut this woman completely out of your life. You're not happy, that is clear as day. Why torture yourself with someone who does nothing but torture you?
If you can get a refund for the ticket, I would. This bitch doesn't deserve it. I wouldn't... (read in full...)
I cannot find love! Is this only me?
Q. I can not find love, Is this Only me? i was in love very much with someone 10yrs ago, but he said me cant be together with me. After that.. for 8yrs i met many guys but never feel something special for them.. 2yrs ago i met a guy, he likes me s...
A. 18 January 2011: True love is hard to find. Sometimes when we are hurt, we shut ourselves down to options that come along because we don't want to be hurt again. These emotional walls are noticable to people, even if you never tell them. Someone may not be ... (read in full...)
Our sex life isn't what it should be!
Q. im 25 and my bf is 39 so far we have a good relantionship but im concern about our sex life hes sex drive isnt where i would like it to be i wanted to know do men at that age not geet in the mood to have sex as much...and how can i get hem to want ...
A. 18 January 2011: What has he said when you talked to him about this?
Typically, men's sex drives slowly decrease from about the age of 23 on. We reach our peak somewhere between 18-23 and it's all down hill after that (generalities).
Some people just don'... (read in full...)
I found out everything he told me about his finances is a lie!
Q. I was married in August, to a man I knew when I was a teenager...He is 21 years in the military, and I thought his word was solid... We have only lived together for a month and a half because he was sent on an 8 week mission shortly after the ...
A. 18 January 2011: Yikes! And now that you're married, his debt becomes shared. Good times.
You can be reasonably certain that he's lied about pretty much everything financially concerned. That being the case, you may want to consider what other stuff he's lyi... (read in full...)
I keep falling into passionate platonic relationships!
Q. Dear Cupid, I've been noticing a trend I have of falling into "passionate platonic relationships" with certain men. It's not that I'm not attracted to men in general, but the ones who really trigger me emotionally end up being platonic friends...
A. 18 January 2011: "dirtball, I think we were both attracted to each other but he kept saying he wasn't "worthy" enough to have a full out relationship. So..."
Either you didn't do a good enough job of assuring him he was worthy, or that was a lame excuse from him... (read in full...)
I want more interaction between my ex wife, the kids and my girlfriend
Q. Back story: After a really dead marriage, I left the family domicile 2 yrs ago, where my ex and 2 younger children still reside. After a few months of living apart, my ex and I made a casual attempt at getting back together without the knowledge of ...
A. 18 January 2011: You are very fortunate in this situation. Thank you for the update and best of luck going forward!... (read in full...)
He is happy living alone but I am not
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for just under 2 years and really love each other and most of the times things are good. We are both 31 and I have been engaged before but never married and he has never lived with a woman before. Last...
A. 14 January 2011: Well, I'm kind of with him. Moving in together is a big step. It would be best if a 30 year mortgage wasn't tied to that step. Perhaps a shared apartment would be a better first living arrangement for the two of you.
If you're not moving f... (read in full...)
I always said I'd leave a cheater, but now that its happening to me I'm torn!
Q. I have been dating my girlfriend for about two years now and we have been living together for about one year. We share a lap top and I came across her facebook page the other day where she had forgotten to log out. I have never gone through her ...
A. 14 January 2011: Yeah, she feels terrible because she got caught. Would she feel this bad if you hadn't have busted her? Nope. If she did, she wouldn't have cheated in the first place!
It's up to you to decide if you can forgive her, and if you believe she will... (read in full...)
My marriage proposal sucked! Should I let him do it again?
Q. SO I’m engaged but my proposal Sucked!!! he didn’t even decorate there was no romantic music and he knows that I love flowers and he didn’t even give me one!!! He used a beat up candle that was already used and I didn’t even get to dress up nor ...
A. 14 January 2011: Holy expectations Batman!
Ever watch the show 'Scrubs?' You remind me of Elliot when she was proposed to.
Why do you have to lie? If you're ashamed of him, you should have told him no. You sound way to high maintenance and high strung to m... (read in full...)
I don't know how to tongue kiss
Q. I really want to tongue kiss my bf friend but ive never done it before I know that he has but im not sure if he wants to with me What do I do?...
A. 14 January 2011: Ask him to show you how. He'll like that.
Really, it's pretty simple. While you're kissing you open your mouth a little further and start rubbing your tongues together. The key is to meet in the middle. If you're ramming your tongue down his... (read in full...)
I don't know if my ex was referring to me or another guy. How do I take her remark?
Q. I had a sexual past with a girl and well, it was kinda a relationship, we had emotions for each other. But we broke up and all and its been 2 years now since we have broken up. She loves to tease, and flirt, its who she is and everything. We were ...
A. 14 January 2011: You shouldn't take it as anything. She had a "naughty thought." It doesn't have to be about anyone in particular. It could be about Johnny Depp for all it matters.
Try not to over think things.... (read in full...)
I'm too shy to say "I love you"
Q. i'm in love with a guy but im just 2 shy to say i luv u.we already went to a drive in movie. plz give advice...
A. 14 January 2011: How long have you been together? Just because you went on a date doesn't mean you have to confess love.
When you feel it, and you're ready, the words will just come out.... (read in full...)
If I'm pretty then why have I been single for 16 years?
Q. If this is true, then why don't i have a boyfriend? I've been single for going on 16 (yes 16) years, people tell me that I'm pretty and what not and that I can have any guy I want. IF that's true then why am I still single? I'm 34 years old and...
A. 14 January 2011: What have you done to change your status? Have you gone on dates? Have you asked guys out?
If waiting around isn't working, then you're going to have to get proactive in your approach. ... (read in full...)
LDR-how to make our anniversary special?
Q. hi, simply im in a long distance relationship with such a nice guy We were in the same country but the conditions separated us ! so , our first anniversairy is almost close and i dont really know what to do? i want to make this day special for me a...
A. 14 January 2011: A surprise visit
A singing telegram
A heart felt card
A nice picture of you two together with a note on the back... (read in full...)
Do all girls squirt?
Q. what happens when a girl masturbates ..i mean she rubs her clit? do all girls squirt? if not...how can a girl please herself enough to squirt??...
A. 14 January 2011: Not all girls squirt. Many are simply incapable of it. To my knowledge it's triggered by a really intense orgasm. So when it starts feeling really good, keep going!... (read in full...)
I keep falling into passionate platonic relationships!
Q. Dear Cupid, I've been noticing a trend I have of falling into "passionate platonic relationships" with certain men. It's not that I'm not attracted to men in general, but the ones who really trigger me emotionally end up being platonic friends...
A. 14 January 2011: Who decides these relationships are platonic? I'm a guy who lands in the "friend zone" a lot, but it's rarely by my choosing. Call it more a fault of my approach.
If you decide these are platonic friends, then perhaps you should try dating o... (read in full...)
Am I setting myself up to be hurt again by her?
Q. There is a woman at my job that I have really fallen for. We started talking as friends last year and sometime in July of last year I looked at her one day and something changed. All she did was look at me and smile. I suddenly wanted to be more ...
A. 13 January 2011: My gut feeling here is she's keeping you around as a fall back. When things don't go right for her on other fronts, she knows you'll be there to boost her back up. She will then take that confidence you've helped re-establish and be off to her ... (read in full...)
I want more interaction between my ex wife, the kids and my girlfriend
Q. Back story: After a really dead marriage, I left the family domicile 2 yrs ago, where my ex and 2 younger children still reside. After a few months of living apart, my ex and I made a casual attempt at getting back together without the knowledge of ...
A. 6 January 2011: "Thanks dirtball - not sure how you picked your name, but it just doesn't seem to fit. :P"
You'll just have to take my word for it that it fits quite well. It really shines through on certain topics.... (read in full...)
I want more interaction between my ex wife, the kids and my girlfriend
Q. Back story: After a really dead marriage, I left the family domicile 2 yrs ago, where my ex and 2 younger children still reside. After a few months of living apart, my ex and I made a casual attempt at getting back together without the knowledge of ...
A. 6 January 2011: I don't see any reason why you couldn't have a healthy relationship with your children and a new GF. It sounds like the divorce was for the best and overall the relationships seem to be doing well.
My best advice is to be honest with your kid... (read in full...)
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