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This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
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This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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My girlfriend and I broke up recently and I'm suffering from the sex withdrawal
Q. I've recently broke up with my long term girlfriend. Withdrawel is really starting to kick in. I really miss her! Kissing, being together, talking everyday, and last but not least; SEX! I just feel like I want to be doing these things with her ...
A. 23 July 2007: I'm old fashioned, I know, but I feel I can be very direct with a fellow man. Once a relationship ends, the sex ends, too. It can't be otherwise. And if you have passion inside, the urges will come quickly. But, in the end, you have to accept ... (read in full...)
My close guy friend distanced himself after I found a bf..why?
Q. Hello- I a fairly sure that one of my best friends has abandoned our friendship because I am no longer single. I will describe the situation and perhaps you all can tell me what you think. I met this man several years ago while in college. We bot...
A. 23 July 2007: There is nothing you can do but keep going. HE is avoiding the contact, obviously because he didn't like your being in a relationship. I don't think it would be justified to leave the man you love over your friend, particularly because you don't ... (read in full...)
Will my lover ever leave his wife and his unhappy marriage?
Q. 13 years ago, I met the love of my life and I have never fallen out of love with him. I got married and had a child and just this year, my one true love, whom I have seen in passing throughout the years, reentered my life. We met for lunch and we ...
A. 23 July 2007: I see you are in full control of your situation. Yes, the big question is whether he will leave his marriage or not. His words suggest he is looking for a good reason to leave. Which would suggest he might just find it easier to stay where he is. ... (read in full...)
She claims the anniversary of her Mother's death took a toll on her and she needs space from the relationship! Any advice?
Q. i have been dating this older lady (8yrs older) in a long distance relationship for approx 6mos me in l.a. she in n.y., now her spouse past about 7-8yrs ago and her mother passing a year ago. now she had relationships but one only lasting about 1 ...
A. 23 July 2007: Mr. West Coast,
I can only speculate about what went on here. But, my guess is, the anniversary did mean something for her, but I don't think it was her mother's. You don't leave a lover because your mother died, do you?
Women test me... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has been irritating me lately and I'm cheating on him
Q. i have a big problem. you will think im awful and thats fine coz i think i am i just cant help myself. i have a boyfriend of 3 years. i know he loves me but my parents majorly disaprove of me seeing him. i love him but lately little things have been ...
A. 23 July 2007: First of all, I would need to say that cheating is not right. That does not make you the worst of persons, but it is not right, and you should stop it. How would you feel if your boyfriend were cheating on you?
I think only you can tell who you ... (read in full...)
My fiance wants to wed in a Catholic church in his home country India but I'm an aetheist and we've lived in Scotland for years. He won't listen to my opinion
Q. I am so unhappy. My fiance wants me to get married in a Catholic church (I am an atheist), in India (where he is from) - as opposed to Scotland (where we have both lived for years) which means my parents won't be able to attend and it'll be very ...
A. 23 July 2007: Hannah,
I suppose he wants to marry you in a Catholic ceremony for religious reasons. If he's at least a Sunday Catholic, he won't give in as to this. Since you love him and want to marry him, I think that maybe you can see this marriage... (read in full...)
How do you make your vagina tighter?
Q. whats the best way to get your vagina tighter? ...
A. 23 July 2007: I understand you can do some Kegel exercises (your gynaecologist can tell you better; I'm a man) and have an operation, too. However, I would not advice you to undergo an operation.
You know, this issue shouldn't be a problem for you. From wha... (read in full...)
Help! Pregnancy Scare & Desire To Have A Baby!
Q. Hi, I have ben reading some of the comments on pregnancy issues and I just wanted to ask advice about my situation, I am at the moment going through a pregnancy scare and I am very confused as I am only 18 and my job isnt too great. I have ...
A. 23 July 2007: I think you should talk to your boyfriend about how you feel. But, I agree with the other poster about waiting for the child to come. I think you can safely wait for, say, eight years, with no problems at all. Specially if your job is not great.
... (read in full...)
Tired Of Girlfriend Treating Me More Like A Mate Then A Boyfriend
Q. Me and my girlfrend of 8 months are going through a difficult time. I love her and I know she loves me. Its been difficult seeing each other recently, due to the fact that we are students on summer break and live 2 half hours from each other. Prior ...
A. 23 July 2007: I'm with YummyMummy... (read in full...)
Is she just using me?
Q. I have liked this girl for a while now, we have got to 3rd base on a number of occasions, however she just sees me as 'a bit of fun'. I asked her to go out with me on a date and she turned me down saying she likes another guy. This guy who she like...
A. 23 July 2007: Irish49 has said it all.... (read in full...)
Has He Broken Up With Me?
Q. My boyfriend and I had been arguing because I'd question him about his female friends. He'd always say he's not doing anything but one woman would post smoochies and kisses and love you notes on his page and I'd get upset he'd say she's just his ...
A. 23 July 2007: I agree with xmollyx... (read in full...)
Why is everyone so negative about long distance relationships?
Q. Hi! I wondered something while reading the questions and answers here...why do most answerers automatically say long distance relationships can't work and that the poster should go out and meet someone in there area. Thats not true,some LD's do work,...
A. 23 July 2007: People tell you long distance doesn't work because, unfortunately, many times it doesn't. Long distance requires a hell of a lot of commitment, a lot more than the usual relationship with someone you see every so often.
The posters who agree th... (read in full...)
My girlfriend and I broke up recently and I'm suffering from the sex withdrawal
Q. I've recently broke up with my long term girlfriend. Withdrawel is really starting to kick in. I really miss her! Kissing, being together, talking everyday, and last but not least; SEX! I just feel like I want to be doing these things with her ...
A. 23 July 2007: No. But you'll have to manage.... (read in full...)
He avoids discussing the big issues like having a family; what should I do about his attitude?
Q. Alright. I've had a boyfriend for about 15 months now. He's fabulous; I love him and he says he loves me. He's even proven his love on a few occasions. But then other times, he makes me wonder. (the love aspect of a romantic relationship is ...
A. 23 July 2007: I'm at least eight years your senior, and I'm male, so I think I can say a few things about this.
You are so right about this being the moment for you to have a family. Many people will say that it's not necessarily so, that it's the woman's ... (read in full...)
We've gotten along much better since we broke up but I want to be more than his f**k buddy
Q. Broke up with my boyfriend of 9 months about a month ago because he didnt want to be in a relationship. The week before we broke up it was very tense between us ( silly little arguments etc) But since we have broken up (even the day after!) we g...
A. 22 July 2007: I'll be the cynical killjoy. You were in a relationship with your boyfriend, and everything went wrong. Aha. Then you break up, because he doesn't want to be in a relationship, and then, THE DAY AFTER, he discovers how great you are, and how much ... (read in full...)
Why do i stop myself from having an orgasm?
Q. I never seem to let myself orgasm. Whenever i get close i make my partner stop. What can i do to stop this happening? xx...
A. 22 July 2007: There you have it, katzkitten. Advice from a lady who had the same problem.
I don't know what other people think but, in my opinion, letting absolutely go with someone you love is just wonderful. Try it. I guarantee you'll want more.... (read in full...)
It's all about the sex... no it's about the intimacy... no it really is about the sex
Q. After 9 or 10 good girlfriends over as many years, I found one where the sex is fantastic, perfect really, but the relationship was not great. I ended the relationship but I can't get over the sex, it was just too great between us. I'm not the ...
A. 22 July 2007: Now that you describe the woman, I can tell you I was involved with someone just like this some time ago. You mentioned her whining; I can tell you this much: it would never end and, to your comfort, it would only get worse and worse. At some ... (read in full...)
How do i get him out?
Q. Me and my partner of just over 2 yrs have been on and off for so long that i cant recall how many times we have split. I did have a problem with alchol but after the last time he left (6 weeks ago), i decided to knock the drink on the head whic...
A. 22 July 2007: I think that the only thing you can do is keep going in the same direction, never giving up. You decided to stop drinking, and to stop this bad relationship, and I commend you on that; just stay away from the temptation to go back to what damages ... (read in full...)
My ex was emotionally damaged, but did I have anything to do with the breakup?
Q. This is an extended HELP to all those out there how has loved and lost. I have never loved someone unconditionally until now and he left my life. How does one really get over this? Background, I'm successful physician, money is not a issue, I'm ...
A. 22 July 2007: The anonymous poster has it just right.... (read in full...)
It's all about the sex... no it's about the intimacy... no it really is about the sex
Q. After 9 or 10 good girlfriends over as many years, I found one where the sex is fantastic, perfect really, but the relationship was not great. I ended the relationship but I can't get over the sex, it was just too great between us. I'm not the ...
A. 22 July 2007: I agree with the previous poster. However, this is what you need to do if you want this girl back. Your question was not about it, but about how to get over her.
If getting over her is what you want, I think that you need to go the usual wa... (read in full...)
Sometimes he comes in me, sometimes not... does it mean anything?
Q. This may sound odd but it has been pondering on my mind recently. I would appreciate any answers but from the male gender especially. Being in a long term relationship for several years I have noticed that my partner, or it seems, can be selective...
A. 22 July 2007: I'm not sure about this one. I think the "evidence" is not conclusive.
The previous poster has a point: maybe he's not doing it for any special reason, and he just wants the variety. Some people do ejaculate outside as part of their lovemaki... (read in full...)
Am i over reacting when his does not call?
Q. I've jus recently started dating some one who i've been crushing on for 5 years..and it's been a month..everythings lovey dovey but when he doesn't answer his calls or doesn't reply i get peranoid he's up to something.. I know i'm over reacting but ...
A. 22 July 2007: I think you're insecure about the relationship. You should work on this.
I agree with 88jane: if you call too often, you'll smother him and obviosly he won't want to take your calls.
You mention he is not exactly a guy to stay in relation... (read in full...)
Why do i stop myself from having an orgasm?
Q. I never seem to let myself orgasm. Whenever i get close i make my partner stop. What can i do to stop this happening? xx...
A. 22 July 2007: I read about a similar case once. Sometimes people (women, mostly) are afraid of being in the hands of a man, and they don't orgasm because they feel this is the ultimate in losing control. I disagree a bit about talking to your partner; he can't ... (read in full...)
Is he normal?
Q. Hi I love my friend and he also loves me a lot but the problem is that he is not like others...he rarely calls me and send messages to me . I know that he loves me a lot. My question is that he is very different because lovers usually talks fo...
A. 22 July 2007: It's very difficult to say whether something is "normal" or "abnormal". And then, the word has so many different interpretations. Among cannibals, it was "normal" to eat human flesh. And then, we all have our little excentricities Is it normal ... (read in full...)
What does orgasm mean?
Q. ok i got a quick question my girlfriend says i can make her cum everytime she as sex but i always thought when a girl comes its an organism but my girl said i've never never made her organism ever does that mean im rubbish in bed? or do...
A. 22 July 2007: Well, orgasm is a series of events that take place in your body as a result of sexual activity. However, I think "cum" is a much easier explanation of what orgasm is.
It seems a contradiction, however, that first she says she has them and then... (read in full...)
Is it just a crush or something more?
Q. Ok, this is my first time doing this, and i am pretty nervous about who is going to read this, but i've read a lot of other answers and such, and the people seem to be really understanding so here goes. Well, this summer i met this girl from pol...
A. 22 July 2007: It seems to me she's giving strong hints that she is interested. Why don't you drop a hint to her, to remove the doubt? If she responds to the first hint, escalate to another, and another, until you two are ready.
I think I can't tell what you... (read in full...)
Is it safe for my boyfriend to ejaculate inside me while I am pregnant?
Q. Is it safe for my boyfriend to ejaculate inside me while I am pregnant?...
A. 22 July 2007: I suppose so. STD's are the only reasons why ejaculating inside a woman could be unsafe, I guess.... (read in full...)
He's just signed up to an online dating site.
Q. Hello, I have had an online relationship with someone for about three years now, in that time we have met up a couple of times but recently we have just cooled down to friends and sending emails, although sometimes I think we could be more agai...
A. 21 July 2007: I'm sure you're right in being upset, because you love him. But, obviously, when he said he just wants to be friend, he meant it. I think you should move on.... (read in full...)
Why does she just want to be friends?
Q. Well, to start I met this girl and she is 19 and I am 33. We started dating kind of, after around two weeks or so she told me she is having trouble with the age gap. We still like each other but she wants to be friends for now, but I'll miss hol...
A. 21 July 2007: Generally, you can't do much when a girl just wants to be your friend. In this case, I'm sorry to say that she does have some substance to back her wish. The age gap is very large, but I expect the "life experiences gap" to be much larger. I ... (read in full...)
He's more experienced and I am a virgin. Not ready for sex yet, but do I take this further?
Q. I've been seeing this guy for about five months now and I guess things are going good. It's tough because there is an age gap and he is ALOT more experienced then I am. Anyways I'm still a virgin and as of right now I'm not ready for sex. I'm still ...
A. 21 July 2007: I asked about his age because I wanted to have a clue whether he was this understanding because he is INDEED understanding, or whether he was simply manipulating you. If he were, say, a 40-year old, then I would suspect his being so "understaing" ... (read in full...)
How can i surprise my girlfriend?
Q. Hey, I'm almost back from Portugal and I want to suprise my gf. We have been away from each other for a year when i get back, and I want to thank her for holding on. Anyone have any good ideas on how to suprise her when I get back? Or any good da...
A. 21 July 2007: Perhaps I could give some specific advice if I knew more about you two. But, that's personal issues and none of my business. I think the general idea I can give you is this: you want to show her how much value you give to her holding on. I think ... (read in full...)
He left his pregnant GF for me, but now that she has had the baby I am jealous that he is seeing her so much
Q. il start from the beginning. started a new job, was given my tour and i spotted this lad there, he was gorgeous, i knew from wen i first seen him that he thought the same. he used 2 stay after work for a drink, so i stayed a couple nights a week s...
A. 21 July 2007: I think you cannot expect the man NOT to contact the ex, since they have a baby together. He is doing what he must in taking responsibility for this child. This is not a temporary situation; this is going to last for as long as your boyfriend and ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to spend the night at my girlfriends house?
Q. My special lady owns a house, so i sometime on weekends spend in her house, i live with my cousin, now my cousin is all over me saying am doing it wrong, me i dont find it wrong, my girl too does not find it wrong too. Am asking for advise about th...
A. 21 July 2007: With the information you give, I wonder why it could be wrong. Maybe your cousin disapproves of this? But, why is it any of his business?... (read in full...)
My partner has lost interest in sex
Q. I am a 49 year old divorced woman. My partner of 9 months, who is 43 seems to have lost interest in sex with me. To be honest, his libido has never been very high, but sex was really good at the start and nothing has changed between us (I keep ...
A. 21 July 2007: Something has changed if his interest in sex has changed, too. It seems this isn't a problem you can manage through conversation alone. I suppose you could tell him that things are not working out, and you'll move on. That should make him react. ... (read in full...)
I cheated because my wife cheated, but now I want my f*ckbuddy to go away
Q. Hello all, I have been thru a lot in my years of marriage. My wife has lied and cheated so many times that I gave up any hope that we would ever grow old together. After her last round of cheating, I had had enough and decided to seek out a woman ...
A. 21 July 2007: I agree with the anonymous poster. I hope everything works out just fine. I see you're in a hell of a problem.
As I see it, whatever happens, your priority now is to try to sort things out in your marriage. Given the cheating on both sides, I... (read in full...)
What's wrong with him? We kissed so that MUST be serious
Q. Hi I'm 16 and really need some advice. A few weeks ago I started texting this 18 year old who I really liked. We would text ALL the time, and we would also hang out and stuff, so we really hit it off. One night he dropped me off at my house he gave ...
A. 21 July 2007: What turned him off was the fact that he thought he would use you for the sex, but you wanted more than friendship. By the way, his definition of friendship is "I have the right to sleep with you and stand you up". I say, stay as far away from ... (read in full...)
I want to take a break since he takes me for granted
Q. My boyfriend of 4 years has been acting so strange lately. He has been very mean, constantly telling me that he doesn't want to talk to me on the phone and that he will call me later. He never calls. It is the same way with seeing him too. He ...
A. 21 July 2007: The fact that he doesn't respect you in the least says it all: he doesn't love you anymore. He is leading the relationship the way he pleases and he's mistreating you. And then, I find it awful that HE decides you should not take a break. This ... (read in full...)
No replies to text messages and he said he wouldn't be able to see me for 5 months! Should I just end it?
Q. i need some advice about my relationship with my boyfriend. We've been friends for about 10 months and been together for 7 of those! we used to get on so well. hes the nicest guy you could ever meet. im at uni so we could only see each other every 2 ...
A. 21 July 2007: In short: I think you shouldn't stay in the relationship.
Let's assume he's telling the truth about his being unable to see you for a whole five months. If he cared about you, he would find the way to see you. But, I don't think he is telling ... (read in full...)
He's a friend and we have sex. Should I wait and see if he wants to take this further or just give up?
Q. I am really confused, I need everyone’s help. I knew this guy a few years ago and we just ran into each other a month or so ago. We have been messing around and I have been confused. He only calls me once a week, but he does little things when I am ...
A. 21 July 2007: I agree with Irish49 in her description of the relationship as it is now. This is not good for you, or something you want to maintain. It's a solid truth that, when you love someone, you want to lay claim to a relationship with her, and he isn't ... (read in full...)
Does everyone find giving oral sex a chore? What's your view on this?
Q. I have a question... Does everyone (boys and girls) find giving oral sex as a chore, or something. Alot of the people I talk about as though they don't like to give and only give because they love their partner and they want them to enjoy it. I've t...
A. 21 July 2007: People have different views on oral sex. The vast majority love receiving it, but I have come across some people who don't like that. Apparently less people really enjoy giving it.
My advice for you is: do it if you really want to. If you'd ra... (read in full...)
She's married now and she contacted me saying she still loved me! What should I do?
Q. Please help. 7 years ago I feel deeply In love with a girl that I worked with, I know she loved me too but I was married at the time with children and she had a partner. We never slept together but our relationship was very emotional, we kissed and ...
A. 21 July 2007: I agree: you should leave it: she is married and has a child. Apparently she agrees with this idea, too. You should not try to force things.
My take is, she's not happy in this relationship, and wanted to give you a try. But then she should s... (read in full...)
She wanted to wait before telling others about our relationship..should I bring it up again?
Q. I have recently begun seeing a girl I met while at a volunteer summer job. We clicked the instant we met and we have been seeing each other regularly for over 2 months now. She was just getting over a very unhealthy relationship at the time I met ...
A. 21 July 2007: I think you should ask again. It's a bad sign that she wants to be "clear" of her previous relationship. She should have been clear before she started another relationship with you.
How long will it take before she thinks she's "clear"?... (read in full...)
He's more experienced and I am a virgin. Not ready for sex yet, but do I take this further?
Q. I've been seeing this guy for about five months now and I guess things are going good. It's tough because there is an age gap and he is ALOT more experienced then I am. Anyways I'm still a virgin and as of right now I'm not ready for sex. I'm still ...
A. 20 July 2007: I have a question: how many years your senior is he?... (read in full...)
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