| Latest articles: For all women
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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We dated once and he asked me out again but I felt he was only being polite. What do you think?
Q. I met a man recently, and i am not sure if he likes me. We are from two different worlds but a few things in common, i got mixed feelings on this date and the next day he didn't call, i saw him on msn the next day and he didn't even say hello. I am ...
A. 10 August 2007: He was very clear about describing what happened here: he picked up on your doubts, and was wondering whether YOU wanted to continue to see him. This fully explains his behavior and the waiting.
I think you should give it a try with this man... (read in full...)
I can't forget about him, even though he has a girlfriend!
Q. I really need help with this situation. I feel like im in love with someone. He has a girlfriend, and has been with her for over a year and a half now, but he cheated on her various times with me. He treats her bad, and their always arguing. I know ...
A. 1 August 2007: Well, advice is here.
You need to use your mind, and your heart, too, to control the matters of the heart. You can see the situation clearly, which is more than many people can do, but your heart won't follow. This is your real problem.... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if I actually have a chance with this guy!
Q. I like this guy an he likes me he left for mississippi an we were in love with each other but we never went out but when he came home he got another girl friend but they broke up and his mom asked him why we werent together an he said "mom i dont ...
A. 1 August 2007: I think he was clear: he doesn't want to hurt you. In this case, "hurt" means, "doesn't want a relationship with you". I think he might want to talk to you and the like, but he is not interested in a relationship.... (read in full...)
How do the men feel about dating an older woman?
Q. Men only please! I am a woman in my early fifties and have met a guy in his forties, there is a 8 year gap. He is grey haired and a bit overweight and I am hardly grey at all and trim, fit, and told I look much younger quite often, even in my thirt...
A. 1 August 2007: Personally, if I were in that situation I could not care least. I would go for you, madam.... (read in full...)
Do guys like to date plain-looking female virgins or am I doomed?
Q. Do guys like to date plain female virgins ? I though i would find a man in high school nothing happened , then college but still nothing . I am about to graduate from college and then go to a career college . i fear i will find no guys there who are ...
A. 1 August 2007: I think we need to break down your questions into pieces.
What is the definition of "plain"? What a man finds interesting, another will not. This is one of those slippery words that escape a good definition in the real world.
If you think ... (read in full...)
Is there something wrong with wanting a baby at this age?
Q. I'm 14 and my bf is 15 and we have been having sex and i got worried that i was pregnant then i got my period. And now i want to have a baby! Is there something wrong with that? And how would i tell my mum? She would go crazy. I really Luv my bf an...
A. 1 August 2007: I'm not sure whether there is something wrong about wanting a baby. I am sure you should not have one now. You're so, so young. Your life is barely starting and you're not even physiologically ready, let alone economically or psychologically, for ... (read in full...)
Do not want to risk our friendship.
Q. Hi I don't really know how to go about asking things like this. My best friend has just finished with her boyfriend of 3 years and I really like her more than a best friend. We're both at university and have helped each other through rough patches ...
A. 1 August 2007: Ooops! I forgot one thing. Friends and lovers are different categories of people. If she sees you as a friend, it doesn't matter how you see her. Wait until she gives you a clear sign.
In case she does hint interest, ask yourself whether ... (read in full...)
Do not want to risk our friendship.
Q. Hi I don't really know how to go about asking things like this. My best friend has just finished with her boyfriend of 3 years and I really like her more than a best friend. We're both at university and have helped each other through rough patches ...
A. 1 August 2007: Since she broke up recently, this IS NOT your time to ask her. She must not be all that well. And then, there's the chance that she goes back to that boyfriend.
You need to wait until you're absolutely sure she is over him. What you can do i... (read in full...)
Should I make him choose between her and I, or just leave him?
Q. i really dont know what to do! i'm seeing this very older guy.his 43 and i'm 22 when i met him he told me he wasn't married. then to come and find out he was living with this other woman and has 2 daughters.we still kept seeing each other and in the ...
A. 1 August 2007: You're in a hell of a mess, dear, and only your strong and decided actions will take you out of it. He won't do much for either of you, because he was the one who got you both in this situation, to start with, and he obviously likes it.
I'm a... (read in full...)
I tried to give him some space but I don't want to feel that I have to tread on eggshells with my boyfriend or feel that he doesn't even want to be with me.
Q. Okay so I've been going out with his guy for a while now about a week. And the other night at a party he told me he really liked me and asked if he could kiss me, and we did. But for the past two days or so he has spoke to me very little, and hasn't ...
A. 1 August 2007: Do what every person in your situation needs to do: let him come to you. You have already shown your interest. Let him work on it. If he's interested, too, he'll come your way.... (read in full...)
My friend is pregnant and her bf cheats on her. How can I help her?
Q. Ok well I'm on BCP, so I'm not trying for a baby. But I was wondering how easy it would be for a 17 year old to get pregnant. In a magazine I read that under 18 it is very easy to fall pregnant - If this is true, why is it? Alot of my friends ar...
A. 1 August 2007: I suppose that it's easy to fall pregnant because you're young and fertile. If you're afraid of this, which is so right, I think the BCP should help. If you're too afraid, perhaps you can ask your boyfriend to use a condom.
As to your friend, ... (read in full...)
I really feel the pressure of school and work, became too much for him and it was easiest for him to dump me. Should I tell him I still love him?
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up in April after dating for just over a year. He broke up with me but wanted to maintain a friendship. We have done the post-breakup sex thing but have also managed to spend some time together just hanging out and being ...
A. 1 August 2007: I belong to a different culture, but I just cannot understand how someone would break up with you just because he's feeling the pressure of his master's. I understand he has limited time, but apparently he does find a way to e-mail you, call you, ... (read in full...)
Does he love me but he's just afraid to say so?
Q. I've seen this guy around town for a number of years, and I've always had a crush on him but never really met him, formally. I learned not too long ago, that he and his g/f had split up and he wasn't seeing anyone for the past 2 yrs. Since he used ...
A. 1 August 2007: From what I read, I can have no doubts: this man loves you. He's all over you! When he asked you how you saw the relationship, he wanted to know whether he was going strong with you or not. You say you don't know exactly how he feels about you ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be with him but he wants to be with me so bad. What do i do?
Q. HI, i was involved in a realationship for two years and moved on from that into another one with a really nice guy. yes we had our fights but always got through them for the short time we were together. i dont want to be in a relationship right now. ...
A. 1 August 2007: What you should do is talk to him, honestly and directly, about how you feel, and break up with him if you can't give him what he needs. If you're direct and sincere, and your actions match your words, he will have an easier time accepting this ... (read in full...)
Can an STD like chlamydia make you sterile?
Q. ok i have a std called chlamidia (not sure if thats how its spelled) ok well im getting it taken care of right now. but isnt it true that that std can make you infertile. how long would you have to have it before it did?...
A. 1 August 2007: Chlamydia DOES damage your reproductive organs and has short term and long-term effects on your health. It can make you infertile. You should go to your doctor as soon as possible and get treated. If you have a partner, maybe he needs some ... (read in full...)
I'm having a hard time finding a man who will respect my beliefs!
Q. Hey I'm a 21 year old virgin female, I'm strongly believe in christ, but I'm having a hard time finding a man who can accept and respect that. Any tips?????...
A. 1 August 2007: Kept21,
We understand you go to church for spiritual reasons. A church is certainly NOT what you should think of as a place to get a date. What I meant, and I'm sure the others posters meant that, too, is that you will find a Christian man in t... (read in full...)
Does he like me, or is it just him being friendly?
Q. A guy I recently met through a friend is a super nice and caring guy. I spent a weekend out at the lake with a group of friends, he was there. I live pretty far away, so I don't get to see them often. When I got home I wanted to write him a note ...
A. 31 July 2007: Poster, go for him. Since you're going back to the area, that is the perfect excuse. Go, go go; take your chances on him.... (read in full...)
My partner changed jobs, and now I don't think I see him often enough...
Q. I have been seeing my partner for 14 months. He is a chef and when we met he was living and working in the same town. I have my children on alternate weeks and when they were not with me, I spent the week with my partner. He would come out to me ...
A. 31 July 2007: I don't think your request is unreasonable in itself. You just want to spend more time with him, since you see him so little. However, it seems to me that he would want his Mondays to do some stuff of his own. If he is still seeing you, and loves ... (read in full...)
Has my boyfriend been cheating on me???
Q. I'm 17 and am in my first relationship that has become sexual. My boyfriend (18)and I have been together since February of this year but I was told by a not-so-close guy friend (who doesn't like my boyfriend but has no known interest in me) that a ...
A. 31 July 2007: Yep, you should. All you have is hearsay.... (read in full...)
She said she needs her space and her friends say she will come back to me
Q. My girlfriend of 4 months has jsut left me 5 days ago, she doesn't want a relationship becasue she's jumped out of a two year one and went with me. She says she still loves and cares about me but just doesn't want a relationship at all with...
A. 31 July 2007: Ponungalungb is just right. Take it from someone who has also "been there, done that"...... (read in full...)
I am 12 weeks pregnant is it safe for me and my partner to make love while we are in the bath...?
Q. I am 12 weeks pregnant is it safe for me and my partner to make love while we are in the bath, as I am nice and relaxed when I am in the bath....
A. 31 July 2007: Honestly I don't know, but maybe a doctor can help you with this. I suppose there should be nothing wrong, as 12 weeks isn't that much, really. But, I insist, talk to your doctor.... (read in full...)
I don't know what to do - I have fallen for a guy who is married.
Q. I don't know what to do - I have fallen for a guy who is married. I think he also has a kid but I'm not sure, although I've seen him around with the kid a couple of times now. The thing is that we both really like each other but nothing physical has ...
A. 31 July 2007: You need to understand that this married man has a commitment with another woman, who would not deserve the pain you would cause her if you ever had something with her husband. This alone should stop you from entertaining these thoughts.
You a... (read in full...)
I masturbate and search up porn. I really want to stop.
Q. Hi guys. I know that what I am going to say is kind of not right because I am only 12, but as part of puberty we all get sexual feelings. And so do I. I have dreams about having sex, I masturbate and search up porn. I really want to stop. I really ...
A. 31 July 2007: I am with Myesha. You know, maybe you can stop the porn, but I don't think you'll be able to stop the masturbation.... (read in full...)
I smell more when i wear a thong.
Q. I was wondering if anyone else had this problem. When I wear thongs I stink more down there and then when I dont where thongs I dont stink much. Does anyone else have this or had this problem and what do I do about it?...
A. 30 July 2007: I understand this is because of the fabric with which a thong is made. Cotton underwear should solve the problem.... (read in full...)
He does not want me back.
Q. My ex recently broke up with me, I think to explore other people, we would have been dating two years. Even though he's moved on after two weeks, I cant seem to. I still love him with all my heart, and want to go back out with him, even if there is ...
A. 30 July 2007: Dearest, all you can do is bite your tongue and stay where you are. Believe me, it's for the best. This will seem like BS to you, but, the sun will shine again for you one day. You'll meet someone else and he will love you back.
Don't bang you... (read in full...)
I love him but i'm not happy.
Q. How do i break up with my boyfriend i love,but am not happy with?...
A. 30 July 2007: Mexxican girl,
How would you rather die: after a long, painful agony, or with just one cut of the blade? Here's part of your answer. If you're not happy with him, tell him right now, in a direct manner he can't misunderstand. Maybe you spea... (read in full...)
How can i tell if she wants more?
Q. How can you tell? Hi. I ran into a girl who I dated a couple of times a few years ago on facebook. We exchanged emails since the new year. Since then we have been out a few times. How can I tell if we are just friends or if she wants someth...
A. 30 July 2007: The best way would be to tell her, up front. It would take a hell of a lot of courage, but there would be no mistake about what she wants. You would lose the friendship, if you have one, but, you wouldn't agonize over this.
The hard way is to dr... (read in full...)
Is it true, 'what comes around goes around'?
Q. My partner left after seventeen years togther. She found a new boyfriend within a few days. She handled the breakup poorly telling me over the phone. I turned up at her workplace to she if we could sort things out but was only to find her new part...
A. 30 July 2007: What comes around does not necessarily come around. What you need to do is get over this.
Maybe she didn't cheat with you in the sense that she didn't sleep with this man. But, either she didn't tell you what was going on, or you failed to take ... (read in full...)
She wants time to herself.
Q. My girlfriend of 4 months has jsut left me 5 days ago, she doesn't want a relationship becasue she's jumped out of a two year one and went with me. She says she still loves and cares about me but just doesn't want a relationship at all with anyo...
A. 30 July 2007: This is the advice from someone who's been there. And, I am a man; not that the other poster's advice is wrong, but, it reflects THEIR side of the story.
Listen carefully: If she asks you for space, you're doomed. Move on. Resist the temptati... (read in full...)
I'm having a hard time finding a man who will respect my beliefs!
Q. Hey I'm a 21 year old virgin female, I'm strongly believe in christ, but I'm having a hard time finding a man who can accept and respect that. Any tips?????...
A. 30 July 2007: I like Myesha's answer, and fully support it, too. If you want a Christian, you'll find him in church. Just keep your eyes open; it would be a relationship like any other. Finding such a man would not be a guarantee of a smooth relationship with ... (read in full...)
Help! I have a huge crush on a man I cant have!
Q. Ok..I have a huge crush on a man I cant have! Im nearly 20 and hes 39..Hes so nice I like him loads!! But the only problem is hes just got back in with his ex,who I know cos shes my dads friend.They all go out together,I joined them saturday.I ...
A. 30 July 2007: I'm a man about that age, so I can give you an opinion here. If I found someone not yet twenty, maybe I would be sexually attracted to her, but I would know, right away, that such a relationship wouldn't work. Spare you the pain, dear, and don't ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid of karma.
Q. dear cupid, i'm 18 and i already had not so serious past relationships. i'm afraid that i'll be having my karma in my next relationship which is about to happen now, i can feel that i'm falling for this guy fast but i'm afraid of karma and to expec...
A. 30 July 2007: Personally, I do not believe in karma. But, if this is it, then it is your karma to have this relationship, and perhaps it is your karma that you'll be happy on it, too.... (read in full...)
I need to know how to stand up, wipe the tears and put a smile on my face.
Q. I need some help. How does one stand up and wipe their tears off and put on a happy face in the time they need do regardless if they feel broken down?...
A. 30 July 2007: People do this when they take courage and understand this is the thing to do at the moment. It may not feel right, but, it IS right. I assume you are the broken down person here. Whatever happened to you, dear, you're young and time will help you ... (read in full...)
Am i pregnant and a virgin still?
Q. We are both graduating students in college. He is my first boyfriend and i never engaged with sex ever since. One night i sleep in my boyfriend pad and something happened, we kiss naked but with out intercourse but he ejaculate near into my vagina, ...
A. 30 July 2007: If the semen managed to reach an egg, yes, you could be pregnant and be a virgin still.... (read in full...)
Why do some guy's do this?
Q. Hey, I was wondering if it is normal for some guys to be really touchy feely with girls they are not interested in relationship wise, while at the same time they are in an actual serious relationship in which they are more respectable and slow paced ...
A. 30 July 2007: "Normal" is a hard word to define. "Usual" is better here; and, unfortunately, it is usual. Many guys do this because they want a serious relationship, slowly paced, and sex. Either way he sees you, be careful with your feelings.... (read in full...)
We dated once and he asked me out again but I felt he was only being polite. What do you think?
Q. I met a man recently, and i am not sure if he likes me. We are from two different worlds but a few things in common, i got mixed feelings on this date and the next day he didn't call, i saw him on msn the next day and he didn't even say hello. I am ...
A. 30 July 2007: I feel the same way about this. I'm afraid he is being polite. I suggest you stay away from him for a while and see if he comes your way spontaneously.... (read in full...)
I can't get hard with my gf! Is it because, physically. she's not my usual type?
Q. Ok I am 27 yrs old and dating a 35 yr old woman who I adore... I am 6'7" 250 lbs and have always dated petite womem. My gf is 5'11" and 160lbs so she is very muscular and build like a brickhouse.. I am VERY physically and sexually attracted to her. ...
A. 30 July 2007: I supppose there's a psychological issue here. You're right: if you can have an erection masturbating, all the systems are functioning, except the psychological elements. Maybe you have performance anxiety?... (read in full...)
I think my girlfriend may have cheated on me. Here are the signs...
Q. Okay, I'm worried about a cheating significant other, too. I have trust issues in general, but the thing is my current girl (fiance, actually) who I have been with for two years now almost has this close male friend. They've been friends since hi...
A. 30 July 2007: Maybe she is not cheating on you, though she does show a strong bond to that friend. That, however, would not be my major concern. I would be concerned about the sex. I know people have different needs, but, I think twice a month is too ... (read in full...)
What do you think? Is it time to end the relationship?
Q. It seems like my relationship with my boyfriend is reaching its breaking point. We fight over the smallest of things especially when he sees me being insecure, while if it is the other way around I've found I actually talk to him about it and make ...
A. 30 July 2007: I'm absolutely sure it's about time to have a very direct and sincere conversation with him about the relationship. I'm also absolutely sure that, if he should refuse to have that conversation and, most importantly, act on it, it is time you call ... (read in full...)
Should we let our age difference get in the way?
Q. She is 21 and in college and I am 18 and finishing up high school, we are both interested in each other but we are both concerned about how the age differance will play into our relationship, should we let that matter so much?...
A. 30 July 2007: No. Go for it.... (read in full...)
Does he like me, or is it just him being friendly?
Q. A guy I recently met through a friend is a super nice and caring guy. I spent a weekend out at the lake with a group of friends, he was there. I live pretty far away, so I don't get to see them often. When I got home I wanted to write him a note ...
A. 30 July 2007: I think LisaXXXG has it just right. You obviously fancy him and your confusion comes from your hope that he fancies you, too. You need to know for sure early on, before you get too involved. My experience also is that you should always be bold to ... (read in full...)
When I e-mailed the guy I like and didn't get a reply, he said a while later that he forgotten. Does that mean he's not interested?
Q. An update on my situation...I have been friends with this guy for three years now, and when I left school he gave me his email address and told me that he would like us to remain friends. I emailed him about a month ago and he replied a few days ...
A. 28 July 2007: Poster, I missed something: yes, love is self-denying.
However, try to live on your own. You can't rely on anyone else to give you strength to live. You need to find it inside of yourself. Otherwise, how could you love anyone?
Love is more ... (read in full...)
When I e-mailed the guy I like and didn't get a reply, he said a while later that he forgotten. Does that mean he's not interested?
Q. An update on my situation...I have been friends with this guy for three years now, and when I left school he gave me his email address and told me that he would like us to remain friends. I emailed him about a month ago and he replied a few days ...
A. 28 July 2007: Poster, I'm glad I helped you. I told you what I wished I had done in a similar situation which, as you can assume, didn't end well. I hope my mistake will help you. He is not mean for not reciprocating your love. Sometimes we love a person to... (read in full...)
When I e-mailed the guy I like and didn't get a reply, he said a while later that he forgotten. Does that mean he's not interested?
Q. An update on my situation...I have been friends with this guy for three years now, and when I left school he gave me his email address and told me that he would like us to remain friends. I emailed him about a month ago and he replied a few days ...
A. 28 July 2007: The anonymous male has said what we men would do. Women are different.
You know, I'm making this story very long because, if you're not clear about where you stand, you could get him and you in a hell of a mess, and that wouldn't be nice.
... (read in full...)
When I e-mailed the guy I like and didn't get a reply, he said a while later that he forgotten. Does that mean he's not interested?
Q. An update on my situation...I have been friends with this guy for three years now, and when I left school he gave me his email address and told me that he would like us to remain friends. I emailed him about a month ago and he replied a few days ...
A. 28 July 2007: Well, some clarification is needed here.
You're asking whether you should reply to his e-mail. Your real question, however, is whether you should continue to e-mail him, since, in your opinion, he's not interested in a relationship with you anym... (read in full...)
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