A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've recently broke up with my long term girlfriend. Withdrawel is really starting to kick in. I really miss her! Kissing, being together, talking everyday, and last but not least; SEX!I just feel like I want to be doing these things with her all the time now, but I can't and I feel like a caged animal. Is there anyway to calm my urges??
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (23 July 2007):
 I'm old fashioned, I know, but I feel I can be very direct with a fellow man. Once a relationship ends, the sex ends, too. It can't be otherwise. And if you have passion inside, the urges will come quickly. But, in the end, you have to accept the bare facts. By the way, I also think that women get consoling talk and men get short phrases. But...
A
male
reader, nigelfuxwell  +, writes (23 July 2007):
 I've always found it ironic that whenever a woman expresses her depression or difficulty adjusting to a breakup, she typically gets a long consoling talk from someone. But when a guy has the same feelings (although you expressed yours in quite a colorful manner) he is told "you'll get over it" and that's about it.Well, they're right, you will get over it. But you asked a very good question. What can you do to calm your urges?That's a tough one. The days and months following a breakup can be tough on a guy, especially if he experiences that "man, I didn't know what I had" syndrome. Sometimes you miss the sex, sometimes it's her smile or the way she made you feel. Other times it's just stupid little things like the smell of her perfume. It seems to me that you're experiencing all of them. I don't know the reasons you ended your relationship with her, but this is the time for you to be honest with yourself. If this girl is really what you want, and you're NOT going to jerk her around and play with her feelings, maybe you should tell her exactly what you just told the world on your post.If that's not a realistic option (and only you know whether it is or not) then to get past the feelings you have now, I always suggest filling your time and thoughts with something constructive. If you have school or work, now's the time to really focus on that. If you don't then get involved with something, whether it's a sport, something academic, a social group, hang out with your friends and family. If you're simply looking to get over her, then immerse yourself in something you find interesting, something you might be passionate about. Time is the only thing that takes care of that feeling of loss and want.In terms of raw sexual needs, well... There's not a man (and probably not too many women) who have had to tend to those needs on their own, my friend. It sucks, but hey... You asked the question, I'm just giving you an option...You're not alone, we all go through this, and it's not easy, but you do have options. Hang in there a little while, and you'll come out of it a better man.
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A
female
reader, Shan14 +, writes (23 July 2007):
 Of course your going to feel that way!!!!!! You've went with her for a long time but sooner or later you'll find someone else to fufill your needs.
Hope I helped!!!!
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (23 July 2007):
No. But you'll have to manage.
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