He cheated throughout our relationship, what do I do?
Q. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 1 year, i guess u could say a bit longer than that but we spent a few months getting to know each other 1st. Through out the course of the year, i suspected he was up to no good, he called me ...
A. 27 June 2012: You must understand. He didn't cheat *on* you. He cheated *with* you on his girlfriend. You are his woman on the side. You were not his primary relationship.
Your entire relationship has been a lie. You thought about a future with him with... (read in full...)
B/f uses porn with girls that look like me and thinks of me?
Q. I've got a long story to tell I want people's ideas. My current boyfriend has told me of his porn habits that seem a little strange. He claims when we were connecting by email (we knew each other from the pub but I found him on a dating site.) th...
A. 26 June 2012: I think he's a porn addict who has a creative imagination when it comes to explanations. Seriously, you're in front of him, willing and eager, and he's in the process of growing a healthy relationship with you, and porn is *this* important to him ... (read in full...)
I've had anxiety as we had a threesome and his condom fell off!
Q. hi. my girl and i recently had our first threesome with another guy , and the rule for the other guy was to wear a condom. well, while he was in the middle of things, his condom came off. now, im ok with the fact that we did the threesome, but not ...
A. 25 June 2012: Strange. Big deal, the condom came off. Sex is risky. She took a shower, the condom is out, and the vagina is remarkably self-cleaning.
Threesomes. Blech. Sounds like when you scratched this fantasy itch, you realized that you can't handle i... (read in full...)
Should I just give up on this relationship?
Q. My boyfriend and I recently split up over my jealousy issues over his relationships with his female friends. When we were together he told me he loved me and was only interested in me. We even talked about marriage and I moved in with him after only ...
A. 25 June 2012: It's okay to have friends of the opposite sex. However, it's NOT okay to have friends of the opposite sex who either used to be lovers OR if either you or the friend has had romantic interest in you. This covers exes, former FWB's, people you've ... (read in full...)
I found these email and now I can't shake the feeling that I should no longer trust him!
Q. my husband and i have a wonderful relationship but the one thing that bothers me is that i have found certain emails where hes told one woman that she was hot and another one where he states that hes horny too and cant open up the website and what ...
A. 25 June 2012: What made you dig through his emails to the point of going back 2 years ago? Sounds like you don't trust him anyways and haven't trusted him. I think we need more of the story, because a woman doesn't simply rifle through and snoop through her ... (read in full...)
Should he stop communicating with a girl he almost went on a date with during our brief breakup?
Q. Please MEN (and ladies) help answer this: My BF broke up with me in Nov said he was "talking" to a girl havent met up yet or anything...2 ks later begs to come back to the relationship w me exclusively says the breakup was NEVER related to another ...
A. 25 June 2012: I think you're right. He either is with you, or he isn't. It's profane to a relationship to keep his options open like that, and any female friend who is or was either an ex or a former romantic interest is disqualified from being a platonic ... (read in full...)
I'm obsessing over her break-up sex with her ex
Q. This is quite a long message I know but I’m incredibly unhappy and could really use some good advice. So basically, I started university about a year ago and met this girl in my flat that I really liked but had a boyfriend of two years at home tha...
A. 23 June 2012: This is messy. Honestly, if you have any brains at all that are above the waistline, you would leave her and move on.
Here's why:
1. You started your relationship with zero trust. She cheated on her boyfriend with you. You are dating a kno... (read in full...)
I feel great while masturbating but as soon as I have an orgasm, the first thought in my head is, what would my family think?
Q. Is masturbating wrong? Some people may say morally yes or no, I am a 23 year old female who loves sex but loves to masturbate. I feel great while doing so but as soon as I have an orgasm, the first thought in my head is what would my family think?...
A. 23 June 2012: Well, the next time that thought pops into your head, instead of feeling ashamed that your family might think ill of you, consider what they're missing out on!
Masturbation is healthy, stress reducing, and a non-harmful endorphin release. In our ... (read in full...)
Is it reasonable to feel hurt when my boyfriend was late with his usual anniversary gesture?
Q. My boyfriend and I celebrate 100 days, 200 days, and 300 days, 1000 days, etc. anniversaries rather than months/years which is important to our culture. There's even a smartphone app for counting d-days. Anyway for our recent anniversary I wrote him ...
A. 23 June 2012: I actually agree with the male anonymous poster on here.
I can barely keep up with how long 30 days takes. My husband laughs at me when I ask him what day it is when the calendar is right in front of me. To remember Day 350, Day 1,000 is daunt... (read in full...)
New boyfriend admitted he can't get an erection because of my weight and I'm devastated....Help!?
Q. I have an incredible new boyfriend I really like, but he has trouble getting and keeping an erection, and the reason is.....my weight. We are incredibly drawn to each other on so many levels- intellectually, emotionally, etc. He says he finds my ...
A. 21 June 2012: First of all, you are *amazing*. Losing 80 pounds is fantastic, and you should be feeling proud of yourself instead of like dirt. My heart truly goes out to you because of this.
Here's something that might make you feel better. This guy isn'... (read in full...)
Lost virginity to two Malaysian hookers. Should I feel bad?
Q. I am in the navy and am 21 years old. When i was in Malaysia a couple years back, me and my friends were partying at a club in downtown Kuala Lumpur. We were all drinking and getting pretty drunk. Then late into the night, the club started to ...
A. 21 June 2012: I would be completely grossed out, and pretty much would insist on a doctor's bill of health before I'd let you touch me.
It's your life, though. I will say this -- you may have lost your virginity mechanically, but you're still an emotiona... (read in full...)
I masturbate and then don't want sex with my wife
Q. I don't seem to be sexually attracted to my wife very much. I'm not not sure if its a labido thing or what. I do masturbate to porn though when she's not around but as soon as she's back and wants sex I'm not interested. I do love her and want her ...
A. 21 June 2012: I say this every time I see a post with this subject, but I have to tell you...look at the website person12345 posted. It will save your sex life and your marriage. The site "your brain on porn" is nonjudgmental, non-preachy, and it deals with the ... (read in full...)
The love of my life used to be an escort... can I forgive her?
Q. I met the girl of my dreams... or so I thought. A little background... She is a senior in college and I'm a few years older than she is with a solid career. She is beautiful, intelligent, exciting, fun... she was the perfect woman. I never ...
A. 20 June 2012: Yeah, I see your point then, DLH. I usually don't break out the "boyfriend" word unless I'm exclusive with a guy. That being said, I don't call someone a boyfriend in the first month of dating.
So, yeah, given the new information you just pro... (read in full...)
The love of my life used to be an escort... can I forgive her?
Q. I met the girl of my dreams... or so I thought. A little background... She is a senior in college and I'm a few years older than she is with a solid career. She is beautiful, intelligent, exciting, fun... she was the perfect woman. I never ...
A. 20 June 2012: When someone starts dating someone, often there are others being dated at the same time. Simply dating someone isn't a promise of exclusivity. Personally, I believe sex shouldn't enter the picture unless there *is* exclusivity, but the sheer ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is very religious, and it's starting to make me uncomfortable. What should I do?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 5 months now, and although he was always religious, this past month he's gotten a little out of hand. He's 28 and I'm 25, and I guess you could say we're both looking for something serious. I grew up in a Catholic ...
A. 19 June 2012: You have to either accept him, or move on. There's no changing someone's religious convictions. You've hit a major issue of compatibility, and unfortunately, it's often religion that can be the stone that breaks a relationship.
This type of ... (read in full...)
The love of my life used to be an escort... can I forgive her?
Q. I met the girl of my dreams... or so I thought. A little background... She is a senior in college and I'm a few years older than she is with a solid career. She is beautiful, intelligent, exciting, fun... she was the perfect woman. I never ...
A. 19 June 2012: That's just it. She was clear she didn't want to have a relationship, and that she was just wanting to be friends. She was not cheating because there wasn't yet an established relationship.
I'm guessing that if she was good enough to pay for ... (read in full...)
The love of my life used to be an escort... can I forgive her?
Q. I met the girl of my dreams... or so I thought. A little background... She is a senior in college and I'm a few years older than she is with a solid career. She is beautiful, intelligent, exciting, fun... she was the perfect woman. I never ...
A. 19 June 2012: I'm with Auntie Susie on this one. It's okay to feel that your life isn't compatible with a woman who worked as an escort. That's within your rights, and many guys would shy away from someone who has that in their past. Right or wrong, that is ... (read in full...)
Is settling for someone who is lovely but is not "the one" ever right?
Q. hi there, the kind of man who would be perfect for me simply does not exist, for a lot of reasons. im sure of this. however i am currently with a man who loves me dearly and is wonderful. i just wonder if settling for someone who is lovely bu...
A. 19 June 2012: I personally do not believe in "the one". I believe in falling in love with someone and knowing you could spend the rest of your life with them.
Believing in "the one" forever makes someone second guess their lives and choice in partners... (read in full...)
Should I tell my wife that I cheated on her once?
Q. I need advice on an age old question. To tell or not to tell. I cheated on my wife one time. After 1 year of marriage. I felt horrible and vowed to never do it again. Promised myself I'd make up for it by being an amazing husband. And I have been....
A. 17 June 2012: You totally know that the whole "Way back while we were living together, my wife..." excuse is crap. If you had truly suspected that she was cheating, you wouldn't have married her.
You didn't cheat once. You're a serial cheater, and by my co... (read in full...)
I saw my husband groping and touching his younger friend! Is my husband gay?
Q. Dear Cupid My hubby and I have been married for 30 years and together for 34 years. He likes to drink but not everyday. Just on weekends. Last Friday night when him and his friend who is young enough to be our son came home they were both dru...
A. 16 June 2012: Here's the deal. If you totally remove the gay element from this, what you saw is him cheating on you with someone younger. Had that been a woman, you would have zero confusion and total clarity on what to do.
Add the gay element, and yes, it'... (read in full...)
I want my new boyfriend to be more adventurous in bed. Should I say something?
Q. I love it when guys are really animalistic in bed, but my new boyfriend is really tame and romantic, which is lovely but doesn't get me fired up at all. Should i say/do something? Thanks x...
A. 16 June 2012: The fact that he's new works in your favor. You can tell him you want to try new things with him. Don't come across like you want things you've gotten from past boyfriends. Sex is an adventure every time you're with someone new.
He might no... (read in full...)
My BF says he doesn't need to wear a condom because he smokes.... is this true?
Q. My boyfriend smokes so should he wear a condom when we start to have sex because I've heard it's more difficult for a girl to get pregnant from a boy who smokes cigarettes?...
A. 16 June 2012: Heh, if that were true, then none of us fine aunts would be here to give advice, since smoking was WAY more prevalent in our parents' and grandparents' time. That "after sex" cigarette was fabled to be the best of all! The human race would have ... (read in full...)
How can I make him see that there is a difference between an accident and an intentional reaction?
Q. I accidently kicked my husband in the groin (he was standing behind me) as I was explaining to my older son that it was unacceptable to constantly thump my younger son. My husband suddenly ran and lunged at me with his thick MBT shoes on and kick...
A. 16 June 2012: He hit her hard enough to cause a bruise. He hit her in a clunky pair of shoes. She must have gotten away from him when he yelled out in pain. He made the decision to run at her and kick her.
A guy doesn't have to be hit hard to feel great pa... (read in full...)
How can I make him see that there is a difference between an accident and an intentional reaction?
Q. I accidently kicked my husband in the groin (he was standing behind me) as I was explaining to my older son that it was unacceptable to constantly thump my younger son. My husband suddenly ran and lunged at me with his thick MBT shoes on and kick...
A. 15 June 2012: I've spent enough time in martial arts training (Tae Kwon Do)to know that there are non-harming demonstrations when showing a proper and improper technique in self-defense. I know that you were not intentionally trying to hurt your husband.
I'm a... (read in full...)
Should I give her some space and time to think instead of being so enthusiastic to go see her?
Q. So, about a month ago I met the most wonderful woman. She is 31 with 2 kids, and I'm 26 with one. We both are recently divorced. (both our ex's cheated about 9 months ago) we have known each other for a few years, (I went to school with her ex, and ...
A. 15 June 2012: What was the habit that got her so upset? Did she catch you watching porn or ogling other women on the street? What kind of habit are we talking about here?
If it didn't involve you cheating on her with another woman or breaking the law or are h... (read in full...)
I feel that my boyfriend is ashamed of me and is keeping me away from his inner circle and family
Q. Im 21 and my bf is 30.... and we have been together for almost a year. When I first met him I was just head over heels for him because he's everything I thought I wanted. But lately I just keeping asking myself should I leave. I mean we get along ...
A. 15 June 2012: I think that his keeping you from his family and excluding you isn't the real problem here. This is all a symptom of the real issue...and the one that is breaking your heart.
He is keeping you from the intimacy of his inner life. You said so ... (read in full...)
A guy told me the other day . If I really love him, I must reduce my weight ? Why would someone say like that ??
Q. A guy told me the other day . If i really love him, I must reduce my weight ? Why would someone say like that ??...
A. 13 June 2012: I disagree about the motive about being concerned about her health. When that's in play, the guy usually says "I love you...", not "If you love me". It's a selfish end, not an unselfish one.
The whole "If you love me" implies that he wants he... (read in full...)
B/f upset that I don't spend time with him but I'm busy and tired!
Q. My school and work schedules are exhausting but my boyfriend is hurt that I don't spend enough time with him. I have classes Tues, Wed, and Thurs. 2.5 hours in the morning and 2.5 hours in the evening. In between I have 3 hours of break in between ...
A. 12 June 2012: If you're working every weekend late hours, and your school is demanding, you might simply not have enough time in your schedule to grow a relationship with a guy. Three hours a couple days a week is pretty restrictive.
HOWEVER, and I'm telling ... (read in full...)
Men only: How should I act with this guy. I want a casual sexual relationship
Q. Hi all, I need some advice from men who will know or should know the answer! Basically, I'm not the best at relationships, I don't know how to act and I manage to ruin things in the early stages. Basically, two Fridays ago I went out clubb...
A. 12 June 2012: Getting into an FWB is the easiest thing in the world, especially for a girl in this society. Just tell him you're interested in no strings attached sexual friendship, and then you make sure you're protected against STD's. Make sure there are ... (read in full...)
I only fancy people I have no chance with. If I find out a crush likes me, I lose interest in her. What can I do about this?
Q. I don't understand how my mind works. I fancy people, but these are all people I never have a chance with. But I never fancy people I would/do have a chance with. For example, I liked a girl before I found out she had a crush on me too. Now I no...
A. 11 June 2012: I need to preface what I'm about to say to you by telling you that I'm not saying this in a negative manner, nor am I judging you. In fact, I hope instead of becoming angry or defensive at what I'm about to say, you'll take it to heart and ... (read in full...)
I believe I am God's match for her
Q. I am in love wih my best friend (female) and I'm pretty sure she hasn't thought of me in a romantic way. I honestly love everything about her. I'm nothing special but I do feel that I am God's match for her. What do I do? How do I go about it? Any ...
A. 9 June 2012: I agree with Cerberus, but for different reasons.
God doesn't match people. You have to court her like you would any other person. You are open to rejection by her same as anyone else. She might not feel the same for you that you do for her.... (read in full...)
I'm dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and the death of my son's dad, and boyfriend tells me I'm being insensitive!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year, and until now, I had virtually zero doubts about our relationship. Here's what happened... For the past few days, I have been really down- depressed, sad, confused. I found out that I'm pre...
A. 9 June 2012: I disagree. You mentioned that he's very supportive regarding your pregnancy.
However, you must understand that while this guy who is your son's father was a part of your life, and it's understandable that his death should affect you as it will ... (read in full...)
My husband is being unreasonable with money. What should I do?
Q. The problem: My husband and I share different beliefs on money. He likes to purchase expensive things where I like expensive things also, but rather buy something reasonable. He lives "in the moment" whereas I like to think of the future. I do...
A. 8 June 2012: I don't know what your earning bracket is, so I'm not going to get hung up on a $2,000 gambling night, a Hummer, or a $5,000 TV. If these things are affordable, then that's fine.
I'm going to talk about Family Household, Inc. If you've ever own... (read in full...)
21 and want pay a prostitute to take my virginity. Is this illegal?
Q. I'm 21 and I want to lose my virginity soon, I don't want to drift into my mid-late 20's early 30's and still be a virgin. I am aware of the protection needed and please don't try and sell me any of the disneyland wait for the right girl and l...
A. 8 June 2012: You're 21 and a virgin? That's not a big deal. Guys make a bigger deal out of that in a negative way when it comes to other guys. Girls are totally okay with it, and it doesn't hinder a relationship.
However, what's your story going to be if th... (read in full...)
What is more important animal attraction or someone who can treat you like a queen?
Q. I am out a long bad relationship. About 6 months now. I have met this super nice guy. He is loving caring and will go anything for me but I'm not sure if I am attracted to him, although we have only have had 5 dates. I can see he is really into me ...
A. 8 June 2012: Well, here's the thing. I wouldn't take animal attraction if that meant that is was high drama, high maintenance, and unstable. You said your relationship was passionate, but really bad.
Attraction to someone doesn't have to be this brute, a... (read in full...)
He says he wants to be single now but he doesn't want me to move on
Q. Hello, I was in a 9 year relationship and we had lived together for 9 years. We decided to move to another state for his job and I had stayed in our old place until he found an apartment. Well he finally found one and right after I sold my stuff and ...
A. 8 June 2012: Wow! Dog in the manger...I just learned something new! Sweet! I agree, of course, with something to add:
I would totally not be surprised to hear that there's a third party involved. Meaning, he either is cheating, or he's interested i... (read in full...)
He says he wants to be single now but he doesn't want me to move on
Q. Hello, I was in a 9 year relationship and we had lived together for 9 years. We decided to move to another state for his job and I had stayed in our old place until he found an apartment. Well he finally found one and right after I sold my stuff and ...
A. 8 June 2012: Wow! Dog in the manger...I just learned something new! Sweet! I agree, of course, with something to add:
I would totally not be surprised to hear that there's a third party involved. Meaning, he either is cheating, or he's interested i... (read in full...)
My wife didn't get to explore her wild side when she was young and now she wants to!
Q. hey guys thank you for your advice. My wife and I have just recently fought over the fact that when she goes out she wants to grind on other guys while dancing. she hasn't gone out alone since last summer. She is not some crazy party girl but the ...
A. 8 June 2012: First of all, married people can have good social lives! In fact, it's essential to retain separate hobbies and some separate interests, as it keeps the marriage fresh and lively.
That being said, there is a fine line here. She shouldn'... (read in full...)
She says she feels snubbed by my family
Q. Hi everyone, I'm in what feels like a ridiculous situation and I'm just looking for some clarity, and confirmation that I am not the one who is completely crazy! Here goes... I'm in a relationship with a girl and we've been together 8 1/2 m...
A. 8 June 2012: I thought about this one and read what you wrote a couple of times. She has every right to be upset by it, and you are the biggest cause of the problem.
This family outting was PLANNED. This means that your sister's boyfriend could have gone hom... (read in full...)
B/f has domestic charges and child endagerment against him. Should I be concerned?
Q. I have a new boyfriend that I have been dating for a few months now. He's really nice to me and treats me well. He recently told me that he has a domestic violence conviction. He tells me it was a male roommate who he got into a fight with. After he ...
A. 7 June 2012: Uhh...NO. Run! RUN!!!!!!!!!
It doesn't matter one bit whether or not the child endangerment charge was dismissed. There was a CHILD involved, and this shows his character that he would get into a fight and compromise a kid without thought.... (read in full...)
Could this hot banker like me and be making subtle moves on me?
Q. There is an amazing woman who is my personal banker and every time I go in to see her about my account (1x weekly but much more this past week)she is constantly twirling her hair, eyes flutter back and forth to my eyes but the question i really ...
A. 7 June 2012: Why not ask her out and find out?? She probably thinks you like HER with as much time as you spend at the bank playing fingersy with her.... (read in full...)
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