| Latest articles: For all women
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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Is saying no to sex when you don't feel like it a bad or good thing?
Q. Is saying no to sex when you don't feel like it a good or a bad thing? Sure you don't feel like it so why shouldn't you say no? But is that the sort of way you'd like your partner to treat you when you're the one wanting it? Personally if ...
A. 20 April 2008: Poster, you do need to get her to talk. With you updates, it is clear that there is a problem, and that is not a difference in desire, or lack of consideration on your part, or lack of ideas about what to do in bed, et cetera. The impression you ... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant by injecting sperm?
Q. I am just wondering the possibilities of getting pregnant by putting sperm in yourself around your ovulation... My girlfriend and I want a baby.. we are trying to take the cheap way my brother is donating the sperm.....
A. 18 April 2008: Yes, Spunky, I won't answer your questions anymore. Not because you asked, though. It's because it would be a waste of my time.
This is the message you sent to me a short time ago:
you need to leave me out of your misgivings I came looking f... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant by injecting sperm?
Q. I am just wondering the possibilities of getting pregnant by putting sperm in yourself around your ovulation... My girlfriend and I want a baby.. we are trying to take the cheap way my brother is donating the sperm.....
A. 18 April 2008: I have to take this personally. And I believe in using the deadliest weapon in the arsenal if I can, so I will go for the jugular vein here. Many people wouldn't think that your post would come from a normal person. If we talk about "normal" and ... (read in full...)
My ex wants a sex fling but does he really want more?
Q. My ex boyfriend dumped me 4 months ago. We were together for a year, lived together as well. Although the reaosn why he broke up with me wasn't actually clear at all, I think it had something to do with him feeling insecure - basically he was more ...
A. 18 April 2008: Don't wait for him. If someone catches your eye, go for that.... (read in full...)
Love Triangle! Am I living in a fantasy?
Q. The backdrop is....8 years ago I was in a relationship with a woman (I'm a woman) we were togther for about three years and then she dumped me to get married to a man. Now, fast forward...this love of my life looked me up about four months ago, now ...
A. 18 April 2008: I like this line from Ask_Oldersister:
"she's not going to give you a serious relationship".
That's all you need to know. If I were you, I would leave her. You're not receiving love, or affection, or the relationship you want: you're th... (read in full...)
Is he still hiding something if he gives me all his passwords?
Q. hi i have a question its kinda iffy so could all of you answer it the best u can thanks. my boyfriend gave me his password to everything that needs a password so does that mean that he has nothing to hide or does he still have something to hide but ...
A. 18 April 2008: I know that sometimes people give you their passwords, without your asking, in order to "prove" they hide nothing. This can be a good sign, or then it could be a clever way to hide the important things: like the anonymous female poster said, you ... (read in full...)
I want her back even though she's moved on. How can I regain her love?
Q. I was in a year and a half long relationship with someone i absolutly love with all my heart. I inevitably drove her out of my life because i was scared of being hurt. she did'nt want to break up but i insisted i needed time to figure out what i w...
A. 18 April 2008: Hamish,
Sorry, but this doesn't bode well for you. I don't think she will leave her current boyfriend. She got tired of waiting for you, and now she has other ideas.
Don't try to be her friend, because you won't like it. Just move on.... (read in full...)
Is saying no to sex when you don't feel like it a bad or good thing?
Q. Is saying no to sex when you don't feel like it a good or a bad thing? Sure you don't feel like it so why shouldn't you say no? But is that the sort of way you'd like your partner to treat you when you're the one wanting it? Personally if ...
A. 18 April 2008: Anonymous male,
One way to summarize your problem is "I wish my wife had sex with me even if she were not in the mood". I believe that this way of putting it makes it easier to give opinions.
Saying "no" to sex, every now and then, is not bei... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant by injecting sperm?
Q. I am just wondering the possibilities of getting pregnant by putting sperm in yourself around your ovulation... My girlfriend and I want a baby.. we are trying to take the cheap way my brother is donating the sperm.....
A. 18 April 2008: Of course, I assume your brother will donate the sperm to your girlfriend, not you. This is none of my business, but you know that relatives have a higher risk of transmitting congenital diseases to their children.
If a little semen in your vag... (read in full...)
Did I frigten him away by telling him that I care about him?
Q. He sent me an emial asking how I was and I replied to him, and among other things I said that I do care about me friends and he's certainly a very very dear one, he didn't reply. The thing is that I don't know if he thought I wasn't serious,...
A. 18 April 2008: Maybe he did take the hint. Or not; we're not good at reading women. However, there can be many reasons why he has not e-mailed you back. Like the Sister says, don't read too much into it. Wait, dear.
If you've been in contact for a year, ma... (read in full...)
I had a period, but could I still be pregnant?
Q. I had unprotected sex with my boyfriend 4 days before my period was due. He came in me. 3 times. I did get my period, but I'm still a bit worried that this doesn't definitely mean I'm not pregnant? Is there a chance I am? ...
A. 18 April 2008: Mother Nature likes to play games on us and that is why it is not exactly predictable, but I would assume you're not pregnant. The process that leads to menstruation was already under way when you had sex. Sometimes Mother Nature likes to play ... (read in full...)
Going to write her a letter. If this was you, what would you write?
Q. I want to write a letter to my girlfriend and I need some good ideas. My girlfriend lives in Southern California and I live in Northern California (about 400 miles away). She is currently 5 and 1/2 months pregnant with my son. She is with her family ...
A. 18 April 2008: Yes, man, I understand; but the CONTENTS of the letter are very important. A simple "I love you and the baby" won't do. It seems you're having more problems than just the physical distance and the fact that you lost the apartment. This is why I ... (read in full...)
Going to write her a letter. If this was you, what would you write?
Q. I want to write a letter to my girlfriend and I need some good ideas. My girlfriend lives in Southern California and I live in Northern California (about 400 miles away). She is currently 5 and 1/2 months pregnant with my son. She is with her family ...
A. 18 April 2008: sqadup661, would you give us more details about your relationship? If you do, we can give you better opinions. You can send us private messages if you want to.... (read in full...)
We see each other 24/7 and it's suffocating me, is it normal to want to see a little less of my husband?
Q. Hi all, my husband and i have been together for 5 yrs married for 3 and we constantly argue over inconsequential things... we work together and see each other 24/7 literally i think an getting to the point where want to see less of him... i kno that ...
A. 17 April 2008: Yes, it's normal. He isn't all of your life.... (read in full...)
Am I being a complete idiot and clinging onto something that isnt going to work.. or is there light at the end of the tunnel?
Q. Okay.. I have been seeing this guy since last July, and we hit it off straight away. He is 10 years older than me and had just come out of a 23 year relationship.. He has 2 children, one of 10 and another 20.. He moved out and rented his own flat. ...
A. 17 April 2008: Dear Yorkshire girl, you're not an idiot, but a woman in love. When we're overtaken by emotion, we do things we wouldn't do. No one with a heart would call you an idiot.
In my way of thinking, our role here is to help you see your situatio... (read in full...)
I don’t know which one is worse space or let’s be friends?
Q. Hello there! It starts with: “Baby we need to talk” - “I think I need a space” or “I think we should break-up”, “Don’t worry we can still be friends”……… OUCH! Dumpee “Honey why? I thought we were tight” Baby please!!! I don’t understand cant ...
A. 17 April 2008: Great article, Jovial. I particularly like these lines:
"Truth hurts but in the long-run it’s the best thing you can tell someone who really cares about you so that it becomes their choice to stop or not. Do not prolong the break-up because ... (read in full...)
Will this man ever ask me out?!
Q. Will this man ever ask me out? I am a member of a sports club,he is a teacher there, we are both single and in our 30s. Have known him since august and its doing my head in not knowing if anything will happen with him! He gives me all the signals,...
A. 17 April 2008: Maybe he is not sure about you? You spoke about the signals he sends. What signals do you send?... (read in full...)
Should I pretend that I like it when he hurts me during sex??
Q. me and a guy that i call my sex partner has sex. Its great and all but when he has sex with me he bagans to go faster and i tell him to STOP bcuz he is hurting me that i began to scream. I think he thought i was liking the feeling but i didnt. He ...
A. 17 April 2008: If you feel pain, something is the matter. If I were your boyfriend, and I were doing something wrong, I would like you to tell me so I could correct it. Anyways, pain during sex isn't something you will stand forever. Some day you will have to ... (read in full...)
Should I experiment with this girl I work with? I can't stop fantasizing about her!
Q. I have always considered myself straight until I met this girl named Crystal. We work together and we flirt pretty openly. Over the last several months, I find myself sexually fantasizing about her. A few other girls sometimes, but mostly her. I ...
A. 17 April 2008: Well, I see two issues here.
One is whether you are bisexual. Maybe. You need to know, in order to be yourself.
The second issue is whether you should approach Crystal. In my opinion, you should never date a person you work with. It's not ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong in how I am handling this?
Q. A few months ago I hired a new assistant that is a very young attractive single woman. I attend many trade shows to meet our customers and I think its a good idea for my assistant to come along too once a year as a learning opportunity. I brought ...
A. 17 April 2008: The wife will never be friends with the secretary. Maybe the wife will create a relationship with her, in order to snoop on the husband. But no friendship. In a way, it's good that your wife doesn't like your secretary. You're sure she won't ... (read in full...)
My pregnancy tore us apart. Am I being too traditional or does he just want his freedom?
Q. Hello! I am 28, and my bf is 23. We met about 3 years ago. We live together, and have a baby girl. I became pregnant shortly after we moved in together and it tore us apart. He was scared to death. He moved out (like 5 times) and then dated an...
A. 17 April 2008: I think there is no middle ground here. He became a father sooner than he expected; he needs to take responsibility for that. That means he can't have sex with other girls. I think he can have sex with you, however, and that would count as ... (read in full...)
Why do men have such problems with my past sex life?
Q. Why do men i date find my one night stands in the past distasteful?...
A. 17 April 2008: I'm with Double M. I quote him: "Jealousy and envy are powerful human emotions. The older we live and the more experiences - we sometimes learn to accept others with less judgement, but some never learn. Be honest, but you do not have to advertise ... (read in full...)
Are there any other people who want to wait for marriage before having sex?
Q. As a young man 25 years old, I want to know if there are any other people from 18-35 who have standards and want to remain virgins when they marry, also would not marry a person who has been divorced and had kids of of wedlock?...
A. 17 April 2008: Last word from me. Yes, Southern Man, I will take my chances with God. Unlike you, he didn't enjoy feeling any better than anyone else, and certainly didn't cast stones at adulterers. He did dislike pharisees who took good care of making their ... (read in full...)
What do you think, is he cheating on me with the pastor? They call each other even 10 times a day...
Q. I was wondering, my gay lover is a good man, and he makes me love him more and more ever day but the the thing is im a jealous guy. So please give some advice. My boyfriend he is a friendly guy and and he has a lot of friend specialy male friends ...
A. 17 April 2008: It seems he is cheating.... (read in full...)
Oral sex lies? I have one I've kept from my boyfriend.
Q. Ok so I recently got in engaged to my boyfriend. But i am keeping ONE lie from him, which is that i have never given oral sex before, I have given it to one guy, but i told my soon to be husband that he is the first guy to get oral sex from me. ...
A. 17 April 2008: Don't say a word. It won't help at all.
From your post I conclude that you gave oral to your fiancé. Why on earth giving oral to someone else would make you bad, but giving it to him wouldn't, is beyond my comprehension. But such is life.... (read in full...)
Am I wrong in how I am handling this?
Q. A few months ago I hired a new assistant that is a very young attractive single woman. I attend many trade shows to meet our customers and I think its a good idea for my assistant to come along too once a year as a learning opportunity. I brought ...
A. 17 April 2008: All of Latin America tends to be very class- and race-conscious, Eddie. You hit the nail. She sees the secretary as "the help" who WILL sleep with the husband. She can't think the secretary might be using this job to pay for her studies. And ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong in how I am handling this?
Q. A few months ago I hired a new assistant that is a very young attractive single woman. I attend many trade shows to meet our customers and I think its a good idea for my assistant to come along too once a year as a learning opportunity. I brought ...
A. 16 April 2008: I apologize in advance if anyone feels offended.
In Mexico, very often secretaries are chosen because of their looks, not so much because of their skills. In any case, their looks are a "plus" for the job, because a pretty girl who is also eff... (read in full...)
A question of who should be president?
Q. During the recent presidntial election many have talked about relgion and morals. John McCain is remarried while his first wife is stil living that is adultery. Hillary Clintons husband is an adulter. Barrack Obama has no cases against h...
A. 16 April 2008: Wow! I didn't know that Roger isn't even an American citizen yet. Anyways, I will still vote for him. He might be corrupt enough to make me Secretary of State, I guess.
In case you're curious about him:
http://en.wik... (read in full...)
A question of who should be president?
Q. During the recent presidntial election many have talked about relgion and morals. John McCain is remarried while his first wife is stil living that is adultery. Hillary Clintons husband is an adulter. Barrack Obama has no cases against h...
A. 16 April 2008: I am not an American citizen, so I will vote for Roger Calero Hurtado, who was born in Nicaragua and was a classmate of mine. He's not an adulterer, as far as I know. He was not a fool when we were young, but apparently he's gone gaga. The poor ... (read in full...)
He was not quite supportive when I told him I cannot climax without a vibrator! Shouldn't he be happy and excited to meet my needs??
Q. I have a problem with my boyfriend of 9 months. Everything in our relationship is great except for the sex. I do enjoy having sex with him very very much, but I can’t orgasm without a vibrator on my clitoris. I don’t know why and I wish it wasn’t ...
A. 16 April 2008: I think that the most important point here is to solve the problem. We can focus on the man being selfish, or on how much it would put you off to have this or that, and still not give help.
I believe Tisha-1 is right here. This is the post abo... (read in full...)
Are there any other people who want to wait for marriage before having sex?
Q. As a young man 25 years old, I want to know if there are any other people from 18-35 who have standards and want to remain virgins when they marry, also would not marry a person who has been divorced and had kids of of wedlock?...
A. 16 April 2008: Wow. I think we should all let Southern Man be. He seems to enjoy this crossed fire. Let him live by his own standards and let us live by ours.
I believe he has a strong interest in sex, like everyone else, but, instead of just recogniz... (read in full...)
What is she playing at! I am so confused
Q. Me and my girlfriend recently broke up about 2 months ago because she got scared because we were planning on getting married in the future, but people were making comments to her on how does she know we are meant to be because we are 20 years old ...
A. 16 April 2008: I think she didn't like the idea that you could be over her and find other people attractive. Her ego suffered. Maybe she had this friend ask you the question to see if you still liked her.
You need to call your own shots, and that demands ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend was married before and I cant get over the fact that I am not his first love
Q. I'm 23 and I've been dating my boyfriend, who is 32, for about 6 months. He had a previous relationship of 10 years, 3 of which they spent married, and he has been divorced for 2 years. Although all this happened before I met him, I am so fru...
A. 15 April 2008: Well, if you can't take the facts, leave him. Otherwise, stay with him and leave the past in the past.... (read in full...)
I'm thinking of having anal sex with a man so I can experience what my GF feels with me...
Q. I'm thinking of having anal sex with a guy so i can experience what my gf does with me .will i get the same sensation?...
A. 15 April 2008: I wouldn't know, but I think the answer is no. She's a girl, and you just came out of the closet. It's your life; be yourself.... (read in full...)
Say what you want what you really really want. ziga ziga haa!
Q. Why do i get dumped when i use a sensitive, attentive approach to women, usually with the 'i like you as a friend' speech. It seems the type of guy they say they want are very different from the guy they are truly looking for. Any advice? I've ...
A. 15 April 2008: A way out of this: Frank B. Kermit, one of the people who contribute to Dear Cupid, can help you: www.franktalks.com.... (read in full...)
Say what you want what you really really want. ziga ziga haa!
Q. Why do i get dumped when i use a sensitive, attentive approach to women, usually with the 'i like you as a friend' speech. It seems the type of guy they say they want are very different from the guy they are truly looking for. Any advice? I've ...
A. 15 April 2008: I guess women are in a much better position to answer this question. They are the other end of the relationship, and they know why a guy gets dumped. At one moment of our lives, all of us men find ourselves thinking that women want the bad guys. ... (read in full...)
Am I doing the wrong thing in staying friends with her?
Q. My gf broke up with me almost 5 months ago now and we've talked a lot since then and its been really hard to let her go. I know shes moving on and doing fine, has a new bf already, and i'm doing fine as well, except when i talk to her or have any ...
A. 15 April 2008: Yes, because it's obvious you're still clinging to hope and don't move on. I don't think you should avoid her like she were a bad girl, but just don't see her anymore and go on with your life without her. Which, by the way, is what your life will ... (read in full...)
Plumper women are preferred in my country! How can I get a larger shape?
Q. Does appearance really matter to guys? I am 1.6 metres tall and weigh only 46kgs. I live in a country where (belive it or not,) plump women are preferred over thin one. I have tried everything to gain weight but i cant. I have a boyfriend and as ...
A. 15 April 2008: Don't worry: you will get fat as you age. That's a given. Look at all the big people around you: most of them weren't like that when they were as young as you are. You just have to eat regularly, with little exercise, and your metabolism will ... (read in full...)
I moved to his country to save our marriage, it's very hard to manage since I don't know the language, what should I do?
Q. Hi everyone, ok, i am in france with my husband for the last three months, he is french, anyhow, for the last three months i have not been working as i am trying to learn the language. However cant get work as you need fluent french for any type of ...
A. 15 April 2008: In general, the French don't want you to speak anything but French. And they don't like it if you have an accent of have trouble speaking; many expect you to be perfectly fluent in French. So, the usual advice about how to get by in a foreign ... (read in full...)
I really don't want this divorce as we're still great friends.
Q. Help! I'm going through a divorce and yet still great friends with my hubby, and really don't want the divorce ...I would love to stay married to him, after all we have shared 25 yrs of marriage and 3 great kids. I'm seeing this guy and love him,...
A. 15 April 2008: Well, I think the old fashioned style will work in this problem.
If you don't want the divorce, why are you getting one? On the other hand, if your husband wants it, how can you prevent it from happening?
If you don't want the divorce because ... (read in full...)
I just want to be his friend, I don't want a relationship with him.
Q. Hi to all. I've been talking through the phone with this old college male friend lately. We live thousands of miles away. We are currently both single. I'm happy talking to him because he always speaks highly of me and he is a good friend. It's l...
A. 15 April 2008: After I posted my first impressions, I saw the posts by the other two agony aunts. I'm sorry to disagree with Cherriepie: This is not the time to be a cold hearted bitch. The man is in love with the poster, and I assume that is because she has ... (read in full...)
I just want to be his friend, I don't want a relationship with him.
Q. Hi to all. I've been talking through the phone with this old college male friend lately. We live thousands of miles away. We are currently both single. I'm happy talking to him because he always speaks highly of me and he is a good friend. It's l...
A. 15 April 2008: I know you will disagree, but tell him what you feel as you feel it, the sooner, the much, much better. Tell him that you can't help but notice he is interested in you as more than a friend, and that you wouldn't want any misunderstanding to arise ... (read in full...)
Are there any other people who want to wait for marriage before having sex?
Q. As a young man 25 years old, I want to know if there are any other people from 18-35 who have standards and want to remain virgins when they marry, also would not marry a person who has been divorced and had kids of of wedlock?...
A. 15 April 2008: There are other people like you. And there are other people who don't follow your standards, but that doesn't mean they don't have any.
A child out of wedlock is a child born when his/her parents aren't "legally" married (The Webster's definiti... (read in full...)
My ex wants a sex fling but does he really want more?
Q. My ex boyfriend dumped me 4 months ago. We were together for a year, lived together as well. Although the reaosn why he broke up with me wasn't actually clear at all, I think it had something to do with him feeling insecure - basically he was more ...
A. 14 April 2008: Poster, he has been crystal clear about what he wants: "sex with no strings" and "all the little things [you] did around the house". That's it.
However, since you want a relationship, not with him, but with someone else, what your ex wants is... (read in full...)
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