A
female
age
36-40,
*izzy
writes:me and a guy that i call my sex partner has sex. Its great and all but when he has sex with me he bagans to go faster and i tell him to STOP bcuz he is hurting me that i began to scream. I think he thought i was liking the feeling but i didnt. He loves to finger me and i love that, should i tell him about his self? or should i pretend that i like it when he hurts me during sex? but to be honest im a shy girl so i'll be too shy to tell him that but if anyone has any advice for me i would like to know.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2008): The least traumatic way to correct "bad" love is to pull/push away and say "Ow!", then show him what you want by using your hands to direct his body parts the way you like it.
If he's going too deep, use your hand(s) between the two of you to keep him out further.
If there's too much friction, try using some lubricant beforehand. Use a water-based lubricant like K-Y jelly. Have fun smearing it all over his rubber tower! Since he's a "sex partner" I DO suggest a condom at all times!
In other words, act rather than talk, and be positive rather than negative.
As for getting him back, tell him, "Well, you're so big, it's bound to hurt a little. I got some lubricating jelly, and I'd like to try again." Guys love to be told they're big.
A
female
reader, kizzy +, writes (22 April 2008):
kizzy is verified as being by the original poster of the question hi you guys i did have the courage to finally tell him about his self. he didn't take it too well he asked me "why does it hurt when i go fast" baby its supposed to feel good. i told him it didn't so i guess since i told his sex hurts me when he goes fast dosen't mean his sex is horrible. we haven't had sex since i told him that. So what can i say or do to make him have sex with me again? (any advice would be very HELPFUL). THANKS!!!!!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2008): just tell him that it hurts and if he loves you he will change
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (17 April 2008):
 If you feel pain, something is the matter. If I were your boyfriend, and I were doing something wrong, I would like you to tell me so I could correct it. Anyways, pain during sex isn't something you will stand forever. Some day you will have to talk to him anyways and say it hurts.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2008): Just say 'stop, you are hurting me' when it hurts. Simple. Then if you like something he does, say, 'oh, that feels good.'
Don't let yourself get hurt, and stand up for yourself. If you're having sex, then you're not really that shy, I think.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2008): You need to be assertive overcome your shyness and tell him it hurts. If he's a decent guy he will be more gentle with you.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, xxtinkerbellxx  +, writes (17 April 2008):
Well i would of said to tell him straight out of course BUT your a shy girl....:S
Soooooooooo....
when your more relaxed with him then try and tell him i know its going to be hard to tell him but if he hurts you during sex its no way to be...
Try break it to him gently just say something like "i didn want to have to say this but when we have sex you go to fast and your really hurting me" Then say can we take it slower from now on"
and the next time you have sex and if he hurts you you may tell him that its either GO SLOW or NO SEX....
simple as..!!
tell me how you get on and if my advise has helped you in anyway
xxx~*~TINKERBELL~*~xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2008): I think you should tell him, how else will he know that he is causing you pain and discomfort. Just be honest and hopefully together you can resolve the problem. Don't be to shy remember it's your body and you need to enjoy the sex as much as he does.
Good luck.
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