Would it be best to keep my sexuality to myself for now?
Q. I've finally come to terms with my own sexuality as being gay, and I feel as if my parents already have an idea however they're always making a joke of it and have made it quite known that it's not something they agree with! Is it wrong to not tel...
A. 3 February 2014: Society loves labels. However, most people when it comes to sexuality tend to be fluid and changing. Especially in adolescence and early college, it's the time to explore individual sexuality. I believe you when you say you're gay, and most ... (read in full...)
I ruined my boyfriend's life because I didn't lose my virginity to him
Q. Hello all, my boyfriend and I have been together for 3years 3months, just recently he found out the guy I lost my virginity to was 20yr old and I was only 16, I regret it completely and know it was a huge mistake when I was immature young and drunk. ...
A. 3 February 2014: Wow, okay I'm glad you were truthful to him and it wasn't a cheating thing.
He has some serious issues if the problem was that the guy was 20 years old. I agree then with the other aunts - this is *his* problem, and he needs to deal with it ... (read in full...)
Who means more to you - the person you loved first or the person you love today?
Q. So I'm just curious here. Who do YOU guys favor more? Do you have more thoughts, special feelings, or emotions towards your "first love" or towards someone who's your "new" love??! I find myself going back and forth between these two guys and there ...
A. 3 February 2014: The man I'm married to was not my first love. I smile today when I think about my first love, and the memories of that innocent time are good. I still feel the shadow of sadness thinking of the day he left for college and we said goodbye, because ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's comment has me crying!
Q. So, I was texting my boyfriend (as we do almost continuously) after he got back from the bar. I'm sure he was a little tipsy. But randomly, in the middle of a comment about how I thought he was attractive, he brought up that he was worried I was in ...
A. 3 February 2014: First of all, calm down! His tipsiness revealed an insecurity in him, something most women don't get to see in a guy for what it is. He thinks that he's not worthy of your love for him. A good response is to reassure him, not freak out and start ... (read in full...)
I ruined my boyfriend's life because I didn't lose my virginity to him
Q. Hello all, my boyfriend and I have been together for 3years 3months, just recently he found out the guy I lost my virginity to was 20yr old and I was only 16, I regret it completely and know it was a huge mistake when I was immature young and drunk. ...
A. 3 February 2014: You're missing some information here, because according to your post, you started dating your boyfriend when you were 16, being that you're 19 now. So my question is - did you cheat on your boyfriend and lose your virginity to the other guy while ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and stopped smoking. How do I help my partner quit the habit as well, without nagging?
Q. I could do with some advice on how to encourage my partner to quit smoking. We both used to smoke but when I fell pregnant 4 months ago I quit immediately and haven't touched one since, nor do I desire too as quite frankly the smell of them makes ...
A. 2 February 2014: What makes me nervous is what happens after the baby is born. Exposure to secondhand smoke is nothing short of dangerous to that tiny baby.
It sounds like your guy has cut down, which is good. Has he tried the electronic cigarette? E-cig is... (read in full...)
I feel that his actions disrespect our relationship
Q. My boyfriend has been talking to another girl recently and I'm wondering if I should be worried? This is what my boyfriend says happened: she is friends with my boyfriends friends and they met while they were all hanging out one night. Her and m...
A. 2 February 2014: Her coming onto him disqualifies her from being allowed into his friend zone. It's not about trust - it's about loyalty. If a guy you knew was coming onto you, friending you, texting you, and telling you how sexy you are and how much he'd love to ... (read in full...)
When is the time to stop lending money to a boyfriend?
Q. When is the time to stop lending money to a boyfriend? My bf and I have been together for 4 years, not living together. He pays maintenance for 2 children, I don't have kids. Over the past 3 years he has borrowed money almost every 2 to 3 months ...
A. 2 February 2014: You'll never see that money back. Never ever lend money to a boyfriend. EVER. It will tear apart a relationship fast.
I'd suggest not loaning out another penny. Even if you were to try getting money back through the courts, they're going to... (read in full...)
Is it normal for his friends to insult a guy who puts his Bf first?
Q. Is it normal behaviour for a man to insult their friends for putting their girlfriends first? My best friend goes out with my boyfriend's best friend, and the other day the two guys started talking about going to Amsterdam for a lads weekend. ...
A. 2 February 2014: I actually agree with your boyfriend in this one. A lad's weekend isn't a crime, and your best friend *is* being a bit manipulative here. It would be different if it were a parent or brother or sister who was about to die, but a family friend, and ... (read in full...)
Am I being stupid, in that this really upset me and made me question my Bf's character?
Q. Hello aunts. I'd like some opinions on a disagreement I had with my boyfriend the other day. He lives next door to an elderly man and they both hate each other. This has been going on for years, and if I'm perfectly honest they are both as ...
A. 2 February 2014: If something like this has been happening for years, then I'd say your boyfriend gets off on the strife between him and the elderly guy. It takes two to fight, and you learn more about his character by his conflicts than you ever will by his sugary ... (read in full...)
I'm uncomfortable with what my girlfriend's male friend messages her on Facebook. How do I approach this?
Q. Hi, I've been in a relationship for 10 months now with somebody I really feel has real long term potential, and could very well be a life partner. Throughout our time together we have ironed out creases and overcome challenges, including us both ...
A. 1 February 2014: That is not a platonic friendship she has. It would be one thing if they were old friends and were chatting about platonic subjects, but his coming up and asking for for naked pictures, explicit sex talk, and talking about you in that way. Put it ... (read in full...)
Is there a correlation between a woman's breast size and her partner's use of porn?
Q. I've noticed that there seems to be a link between women with small chests and them saying their boyfriends watch porn and they don't like it. I want to know is there anyone who is big chested and has a boyfriend who uses porn? ...
A. 1 February 2014: A guy doesn't use porn based on anything that has to do with his partner. He uses it because he wants to. Some guys get addicted, others use it because they are single, or because they want additional sexual relief solo-style.
Let me ask you ... (read in full...)
Mixed messages from my boyfriend. What should I do?
Q. Hello guys, I have a problem here, well, this guy and I have been dating for 2 months now, everything's was fine, he's so nice and sweet and he understands me very well. He's Turkish and I'm from morocco but he lives here in Morocco we're both in u...
A. 1 February 2014: I won't tell you what you want to hear. He doesn't want you to ask questions, treats you like a throwaway, and there's no future. What is there to like?? You have the right idea to drop him. If you go back and waver about wanting him back and ... (read in full...)
After premature ejaculation with sex workers, I'm worried I wouldn't be able to satisfy a future girlfriend
Q. I have never been in a romantic relationship with a woman due to the fact that I tend to be painfully she around women in general. I can only attribute this to the fact that I suffer from a learning disability which has greatly impeded my social ...
A. 1 February 2014: If I'm understanding things, you have only ever had sex with paid workers, right? Okay, sex with a girlfriend is completely different than sex with workers. In one instance, you have *no* experience whatsoever with a woman.
Sex workers are paid... (read in full...)
Ashamed I wasted 18 months with someone who puts me down
Q. Yet again my boyfriend of 18 months has ruined another special occasion. Yesterday I left work early and made a real effort to make his birthday special. I bought him lovely gifts, dressed up and booked a table at his favourite restaurant. We w...
A. 31 January 2014: The *real* shame is if you continue to communicate with him now and waffle back and forth over whether or not you made the right choice. If he puts you down, you leave him, and that's what you did. Don't obsess over whether or not you were with ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend keeps pressuring me to perform oral and I hate it.
Q. I don't know how to say all this without coming out like an asshole but please hear me out. My girlfriend keeps pressuring me to go down on her because she goes down on me but I really don't want to. I've tried it before with several girls ...
A. 31 January 2014: I won't jump on your case, because I was a picky eater as a child, and giving a guy a BJ was an acquired taste for me as well. You're also young, so you're inexperienced.
The vast majority of women DO NOT get pleasured through sex. Telling ... (read in full...)
Is she just too independent? She doesn't seem to care about me!
Q. Is it Ok to want to be alone all the time? I have a friend (a friendship only) who loves her own company, which us fine, we all do at times.. (she lives alone as do I) but its to the point now where she really geniunely likes being al...
A. 30 January 2014: She doesn't sound like a very good friend if she has explosive temper and is hyper-sensitive. That plus the making plans to go together and then buying her own ticket (which are numbered I'm guessing) and saying it's "easier" is inconsiderate.
... (read in full...)
How do I start dating again after being hurt?
Q. Hi Aunts and Uncles. I seem to have an issue with letting myself like men. Every time I have ever let myself feel something I end up getting hurt, and its gotten to the point where my defences are so far up that I think I may come across as uncari...
A. 30 January 2014: If you're getting hurt *every* time you let yourself feel something as you say, then you need to re-evaluate what sort of guy you're attracted to. If you're one of those who are drawn to bad boys or problem cases or "fix-er-uppers", then of course ... (read in full...)
I gave my ex another chance, reunited and I am pregnant - now I find out he cheated and lied. What should I do?
Q. Hi To cut a long story short. I've been with my partner for nearly two years. A little less than a year into the relationship my partner treated me real bad. I don't want to go into too much detail but it left me devastated. We was on and off from...
A. 30 January 2014: Well whose baby is this?? You slept with another guy while you were broken up, right? Did you TELL your boyfriend about this? You thought it meant enough to mention it on here, right?
That's the first thing - establishing the paternity of your ... (read in full...)
I suspect my husband of cheating but can't confront him.
Q. Hi, where do I start! My husband and I have been married for 15 years and have 3 children. Over the last 3 years I've found several occasions where my husband had been trying to get the attention of other women by both texting and facebook. I'm ...
A. 30 January 2014: Why can't you confront him?? You have all the evidence you need that he's either cheating or he's being disloyal. So what exactly is keeping you back? It's understandable that being in denial (aka "Ignorance is bliss") may be easier, but it won't ... (read in full...)
I can't seem to hit a girl's g spot
Q. i have 6.2 inch penis 4.5 inch straight and and around 2 inch slight down curve.. i had sex with thirteen different girl but i never get any negative comment but i still fell insecure because i think i m not able to satisfy and make girls orgasm in ...
A. 30 January 2014: Most women can't have an orgasm through sexual penetration alone, so it's not just you. Also, if you have a downward curve in your penis, that makes it a little bit tougher because guys with an UPWARD curve have a tiny bit more success in that ... (read in full...)
I'm not so interested in sex and I'm afraid my boyfriends desires will lead him to cheat
Q. Hiya aunts and uncles, my fiancé of 4 months and dating for 3 years has been talking in his sleep and has expressed the same concerns in his waking hours. He is 26 and im 23 on valentines day. well, its like this: he doesn't feel like we are inti...
A. 30 January 2014: Sex 3 times per month, but you make him stop watching porn, and you think it's a man's job to "come and get sex"? If you hold onto these notions, you *will* lose him.
First of all, young people in their 20's reduced to sex 3 times per month is... (read in full...)
Tired of husbands childish traits. How should I cope?
Q. Sometimes I really dislike, maybe to the point of hate, my husband. Most of the time he's a great guy. But he has some childish traits that can go beyond irritating. He likes to push buttons and tease to the point where I get genuinely angry,...
A. 30 January 2014: I agree that you can't change him, especially if you knew what he was like before you started dating him. However, I have a couple of lifesaving techniques that could preserve your sanity and maybe serve to help change things for the better.
... (read in full...)
10 days and I haven't heard from him. Will I hear from him again?
Q. So I started talking to this guy on an app called Tinder and he was super cute and sweet and we talked for about 2 weeks and were talking about maybe dating and how much we liked each other already without even meeting. And then we went on two dates ...
A. 30 January 2014: I agree with person12345. The guy sounds like a nutball. NEVER ignore warning signs or bad vibes. Do you want to get some guy who could abuse you or do you bodily harm? No!
Why aren't there local guys you can meet in person and date normally... (read in full...)
If he loves me why can't he say the words? Should I talk to him about this?
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for 3 months. He's absolutely wonderful and we spend as much time as possible together. I sleep over 4-5 times a week. Pretty much been playing house. Clean house, home cooked meals etc. but besides that we genuinely ...
A. 30 January 2014: It's WAY too soon at 3 months! Right now, with the massive amount of time you're spending with him, the domesticity, and now the declarations of love, you could burn out this relationship!
The whole meaning behind "I love you" exposes a fundamen... (read in full...)
Taken advantage of in business with friend
Q. Hi all, I have a problem with a friend that I have known since I was 12 yrs old. Recently she opened a shop and as I have a manufacturing business she asked me if I had any excess stock that she could put in her store on consignment. For those w...
A. 30 January 2014: Take emotion out of your business dealings. She may be your friend, but you have a livelihood here. Not conducting business on a professional level takes food from your family's mouth. And you don't do business with people who delay or miss ... (read in full...)
Going back and forth on my decision to break up
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years. In that period I have cheated on him 3 times, 1 being a one night thing, 2 lasting longer than that. My last affair has been in the last few weeks, and I started to lose feelings for my boyfriend. I ended ...
A. 29 January 2014: Seriously?? You threw the relationship away the moment you cheated on him the first time. Never mind the second or third time. It's all a lie now. You've been hurting him, lying to him, spitting on his feelings, and making a complete mockery of ... (read in full...)
I want to talk about the distance that seems to have come between us, but I don't want to seem needy
Q. I began talking to him in August. as the months passed, we grew closer until he asked me to be his gf in December. Since we live in different states, he flew me out to spend a week with him. it turned out great. I got to know him, and I fell for ...
A. 29 January 2014: I wish this was more complicated, but unfortunately, it plays out so much on here that it's not hard to see what's happened.
You met him online and just visited him for a week, right? Well, the whole entire elaborate pseudo "love-af... (read in full...)
My girlfriend's ex boyfriend bothers her and it's starting to bother me
Q. My girlfriend and her ex boyfriend don't get along very well now. They broke up last summer and she and I started dating a few months ago. They still talk and he is really a dick to her. He says some really mean stuff sometimes, but I don't know the ...
A. 28 January 2014: She is *NOT* over him, and it's inappropriate that she's trying to be all buddy buddy with her ex. People who break up stop being friends with exes unless there are special exceptions, but the big thing is that you have to be 100% OKAY with his ... (read in full...)
So am I plan B, or am I just wishing
Q. Hi, after two months with out any contact, I got a phone call two thirty in the morning, I didnt know the number, every one knows how often these days do you get a wrong number on a cell phone. Well i had a friend call that number an ask for a ...
A. 28 January 2014: 2:30am? She probably drunk-dialed you. And if you're 51-59 years old, aren't you a little old for having a friend screen the call for you, especially if you had an idea who that was?
If she calls again, answer the phone and tell her what you... (read in full...)
When we argue my girlfriend holds her education over my head!
Q. Thanks for the responses in advance. I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for about 4 years now. We live together. She is ready to graduate with her masters degree and I have recently graduated with my bachelors (I was not accepted...
A. 28 January 2014: If she's calling you dumb or stupid, that's verbal abuse, and I'd dump her straight off for that kind of treatment of you.
As far as her education is concerned, never let her make you feel inferior without your permission. People make the mist... (read in full...)
Why do you last longer during sex with someone that you love?
Q. Hello cupid I was wondering why do you last more during sex (no foreplay involved) with someone you love compared to someone you just want to hook up ? why does it differ when you are the same person ? Also it differs from partner to partner ...
A. 28 January 2014: I only have an opinion, and I'm sure it's different from person to person, but a hookup is generally a self-serving activity. A guy lasting shorter may be because he's not as into pleasing the girl he's with. Also a first-time sexual experience ... (read in full...)
Was this saleswoman inappropriate??
Q. I was recently in a gas station on the way to work, quickly getting a drink, it was 12pm and I was in my work uniform. I dont often go to this station but it is close to where i live. The woman behind the counter (40-48) approximately I...
A. 27 January 2014: I agree with the others that she was probably just making a bit of awkward yet friendly small talk. But I want to add some advice from personal experience -
She might have done you a favor.
The last time someone told me I looked pale and ... (read in full...)
NEVER will do anything for a woman unless there is sexual intention involved.
Q. I had a discussion with a friend today about my upcoming trip, and she said that men NEVER will do anyhting for a woman unless there is sexual intention involved. I told her that I had and have plenty of guy friends. She asked me to think under w...
A. 27 January 2014: Guys are human beings too, and no, some relationships are actually platonic.
However, in your case with this guy and taking a trip with him, it is NOT platonic, and he's wanting something more.
Consider your behavior and habits with same-sex pl... (read in full...)
LDR--he won't make an concessions...should I end things?
Q. I am in a long distance relationship and I am not sure if I should continue or not. We live only 88 miles apart so it is possible to see esch other during weekends. The problem is He lives in a small town and I doubt if I can find work there if...
A. 27 January 2014: Oops, forgot to clarify - the bank may not let him sell because *he is underwater* in his mortgage, meaning he owes more than the home is worth now. Say in 2005, he bought the house at $200,000. His payments make him how owe $190k (they make you ... (read in full...)
LDR--he won't make an concessions...should I end things?
Q. I am in a long distance relationship and I am not sure if I should continue or not. We live only 88 miles apart so it is possible to see esch other during weekends. The problem is He lives in a small town and I doubt if I can find work there if...
A. 27 January 2014: I'm going to play a little bit of devil's advocate here, but the "he doesn't want to marry" when you do I consider a deal breaker even if the moving bit wasn't on the table.
If his goals were the same as you (i.e. marriage, family, etc), I can un... (read in full...)
Is having an ex help out wrong?
Q. Hi. I started dating a divorced guy with kids three years after breaking up with alongterm partner (no kids myself). We lived together for a year but then he moved for work, we see each other once a month. As it happens this move for work put him in ...
A. 27 January 2014: As far as the fixing thing is - you're in the right. His ex can call someone to fix things like most single people do. Having his kids doesn't entitle her to his time and home improvements. He pays child support and/or alimony, so unless the ... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if he's "the one".
Q. Hi everyone, just looking for some advice. I'm 25 and have been meeting a guy aged 27 for about two months. We were initially friends, as when I met him, I was meeting somebody else. He made it clear he wanted more, but friends was better than ...
A. 27 January 2014: Of course you're scared! It's been only 2 months, and many relationships haven't started becoming sexual or exclusive until this point.
This guy's moving kinda fast here. If his future talking is getting to you, and he's moving fast sexually... (read in full...)
Is this typical fwb behaviour?
Q. Me and this guy have been seeing each other casually for a few months: however it's been on and off from the beginning. From the start he said he doesn't do relationships, doesn't like the drama and likes 'simple'. Every time I go to his house I c...
A. 27 January 2014: I understand the workings of a FWB, but he's not doing an FWB thing here. He's cheating on his girlfriend. FWB is a stupid scenario, but at least it's an honest one. However, his having a girlfriend on-again, off-again whatever is DISHONEST and ... (read in full...)
How do I confront my housemate about his ridiculous obsession with my mother?
Q. Dear Cupid, I really appreciate the opportunity to speak to someone about my worries, i have never openly discussed my problems with an agony aunt before. One of my housemates, currently a student, has an unnatural and exaggerated attrac...
A. 26 January 2014: Well, until it runs its course, there's nothing you can do to stop a crush on your mom. However, tell him that his talking to you about it in any way would be like him having to listen to his parents having sex. It's just GROSS, and ask him to ... (read in full...)
What can I do? I love her. But got a little boring and repetitive in the bedroom. Yet she refuses to try anything I suggest.
Q. Hi My problem is this, I have been dating my girlfriend now for 4 years in February and things have got a little boring and repetitive for me in the bedroom and without sounding like I'm blaming, it is her. All she wants to do is run the same old...
A. 26 January 2014: She's got some intimacy issues if she's wanting her clothes on all the time during sex. It's one thing (and really REALLY sexy) to have a quickie, throw your partner up against the wall or bed, and start going to town without taking off most of ... (read in full...)
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