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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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He's trying to stop drinking but it always ends in tears!
Q. I have had a horrible evening, my partner is trying to stop drinking, for the sake of ou relationship, its been happening for 3 years, he has stolen from me and others to get drink. i have ended this relationship time after time. because of ...
A. 13 November 2011: Where is your partner now? The worst that would happen to him is that he goes to jail. In order to protect yourself and your child he would indeed go to jail one day. In jail they offer free counselling and therapy. It is more than nonsense to go ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend dumped me a year ago and I'm unsure what to do now
Q. My girlfriend dumped me last year around same time. We remained in a relationship for two year. Since I couldn't get a good job in given dateline of one year to convince her parents for her hands, she ran out of patience with me and dumped. I don’...
A. 12 November 2011: Your motivation of getting a job shouldn't be to seek approval. Do it for yourself. A perfect girlfriend could not help you find out what you want to do in life. You can open up opportunities of getting a job by volunteering and mentoring youth, ... (read in full...)
Ex-boyfriend still causing issues 16 months later
Q. I have had a boyfriend for 16 months and it had a rocky start (never having had "i love you" from parents, grandparents, siblings or past boyfriend). His ex-boyfriend from 2 years ago has non-stop been a real pain in the @$$. Constantly texting ...
A. 12 November 2011: Can't he block his ex's number? He does not have to open text messages. How serious is the stalking? What is the lawful definition of stalking? Unless there was past physical abuse, emotional harrassment it could be difficult to stop a person from ... (read in full...)
Broke up with my boyfriend, then reconciled, and the man I met during the break up thinks I was just cheating
Q. I need some serious mature advice. I do not want "do what you feel is right" kind of advice .. because honestly I do not know what is right no more. Okay, I've been dating my boyfriend for a year and a half but we broke up for 2 weeks due to compl...
A. 12 November 2011: You haven't really reconciled with your ex. Were your complications resolved? I guess they were not since you only lose feelings for your boyfriend because it seems easier to screw up the old relationship and focus on how much fun you are having at ... (read in full...)
Women seem to use me for sex, but I want a relationship
Q. Girls always tell me that I'm attractive, funny and smart -- I'm in university doing chemistry/physics, but I always feel so stupid whenever I get involved with a girl. I really liked this girl, and I slept with her a few times a few weeks ago. I...
A. 12 November 2011: Whenever I see questions to be generalizing, I want to ask, how many of these "women" have you experienced? When the number is greater than 6, then I would say the problem is you. You have just as much power to decline casual sex. It does not make ... (read in full...)
Problems with premature ejaculation!
Q. Hi, I have a sex problem. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years now. He has always had a bit of a problem with premature ejaculation, not coming ridiculously quickly but the sex only ever really lasts ten minutes or something. Anyway, ...
A. 27 October 2011: I should add and emphasize, taking risks does not mean cheating, or flirting with others. You should end the relationship first if you believe you don't have to patience to wait for your boyfriend, or teach him how to become a better lover.... (read in full...)
Problems with premature ejaculation!
Q. Hi, I have a sex problem. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years now. He has always had a bit of a problem with premature ejaculation, not coming ridiculously quickly but the sex only ever really lasts ten minutes or something. Anyway, ...
A. 27 October 2011: To your questions, yes and no. You have a right to enjoy sex in your life time. After you experience all kinds of strong orgasms then what, you still live in this mundane world and the orgasms can't get any stronger that would take you to heaven. ... (read in full...)
Why is my G/f behaving like this?
Q. The first time discovered my girlfriend on the internet asking for quickies and affairs she became angry when I tried to discuss it and she just told me I`m paranoid and was being mentally abusive by making allegations through my own guilt, and I ...
A. 27 October 2011: Yes, dump her. Maybe you want to talk to her to find out how she could treat you like this. Her denial is wasting your time. When someone in a relationship is acting like she is still single she is not your girlfriend anymore, maybe she had not been ... (read in full...)
Nice guys finish last
Q. Nice guys are divided into 2 catagories. The first is the "self proclaimed" (SP). this is the guys that seems to scream, "I'm a nice guy!" These guys are oozing charm on the surface but when you get down to it they are just your "typical male". They ...
A. 25 October 2011: The reason why nice guys finish last is because the good guy behaviours such as caring, gentleness and child rearing are associated with lower testosterone levels. A guy who is adventurous, flirtatious, and risk taking have higher testosterone ... (read in full...)
The Package-Deal Relationship pt.2: When To Introduce Children
Q. Are you currently involved with someone but have yet to introduce them to your children? Are nervous and unsure what type of response you may get from your kids or the person that you're seeing if you do introduce them? Well here's what you ...
A. 25 October 2011: My sex drive also dropped. I don't think about sex that much. At first like many people I would assume something is wrong when there is no sex. Such as is he depressed, does he have ED, will this be a sexless relationship? After I confirmed none of ... (read in full...)
Sexual Fantasies: Just How Open Should You Be In A Relationship?
Q. Some time ago I was watching T.V. and I couldn't find anything that interesting on. As I bypassed many channels, I contemplated whether or not I should just turn the darn thing off. Then I came across the Tyra Banks show. The episode was about ...
A. 25 October 2011: You should feel comfortable sharing anything in a committed relationship. You show trust when you can confide in a person completely. When you share things that only your partner will know it glues an unbreakable bond. Those fantasies don't have to ... (read in full...)
I like him, not sure I love him. What should I do?
Q. i met a guy online am 16 and we started chatting and he gave me his phone number to text him, i texted him n later he sent me his pic and he told him he was cute P.s hes really nice and he told me to send him my pic i sent him n he told me i waz ...
A. 24 October 2011: Of course it's not love, you know it. This is what players say to get you hooked. Since this is mostly a texting game, there is no harm in playing along. Act all happy and cheesy, tell him if he loves you then you should get married. I bet this will ... (read in full...)
I don't want to date her anymore. How do I get her to move out of my life?
Q. I have spent 9 months with this lady and now wana dump her . Well she hasn’t done anything wrong neither me but I have to dump her as I find someone else more attractive than her. She is my 8th girlfriends and I think there is nothing wrong ke...
A. 24 October 2011: There will always be more attractive people. I know that a lot of girls are more attractive than me but I am enough for my boyfriend. Your current date just doesn't do it for you. Your reason shouldn't be you found someone else more attractive. Tell ... (read in full...)
Ladies: How important are a man's looks in a relationship?
Q. Hello. This is not a "problem" as such, but i have a question for the ladies.... TRUTHFULLY, how important are a mans looks in a relationship? I ask this for 2 reasons. Firstly women always say that its personality, kindness, empathy, sense o...
A. 24 October 2011: It's the personality that makes a person look good because one's personality affects how one looks. It's not just the physicals you can see, it's also the energy and vibe you feel in a person. Combined together is what makes people attracted to each ... (read in full...)
Do you think a longterm monogamous relationship is a realistic hope to have in modern society?
Q. Hey, Do you think a longterm monogamous relationship is a realistic hope to have in modern society? I'm asking because my bf of 1.5yrs has been making hints about marriage, and it made me wonder if anyone out there actually manages a happy marriage ...
A. 23 October 2011: It is a realistic hope because there are no better alternatives, such as open relationships. As much as people want to fool themselves into believing they are over jealousy and invent terms like impersion, it's all wishful thinking and phony. Kids ... (read in full...)
He broke up with me saying he didn't love me...now he says he misses me and wants to be friends
Q. I broke up with my ex at the beginning of the year after I had suspected that he and one of my close friends were having a thing behind my back. He never admitted to it but he also never denied it. He told me he just doesn't love me and that was the ...
A. 23 October 2011: It sounds like you both have solid relationships. If you are truly over him there is no harm to become friends. Ask if he is interested in meeting your boyfriend. Suggest a double date. Do this only if you are curious about how he's doing in life ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is flirting with transmen
Q. I'm 25, my boyfriend's 27, we've been together for over 5 years, lived together in our own home for 2 years now. We have a young daughter as well - he's the father, I'm not a single mum etc. - she was born out of wedlock to be technical. In the la...
A. 23 October 2011: I know sex would be the last priority right now and what he said didn't help make you horny at all. I would calmly tell him what he did was unacceptable but the relationship is not ending. Do something fun with him first. Hire a babysitter and go ... (read in full...)
Are we doomed?
Q. We've been together for 3-years. This weekend was a nightmare. A few things were happening, my aunty died about a week ago and I am naturally grieving. But my partner doesn't get it. He's never lost anyone close to him and doesn't know what it's ...
A. 23 October 2011: No you are not doomed. Don't look for him for comfort. He might be thinking that his mere presence could bring you happiness but he has to allow you to be sad for now. All the other aunts would sympathize with you. Show him all the responses so he ... (read in full...)
Do white lies in a relationship matter?
Q. Hey, I'd love your opinions on whether white lies in a relationship matter? I've been with my bf for a year, and he's already mentioning that he can see us having a future together, and has asked me to move in with him. I'm happy about that, but ...
A. 23 October 2011: There are many kinds of white lies. Social politeness, to make someone feel better. I don't consider what he did white lies. Money is a serious matter. He could become unethical when he is desperate to win you over. You should think about moving in ... (read in full...)
He's married and won't always pay attention to me!
Q. Im 22.. And I'm having sOme affair with a 31 yrs old married man.. He says that he is not happy because her wife is already 51 yrs old and he really wants a baby.. Which her wife can't give because of the age (unable to bear a child) he's just ...
A. 23 October 2011: A no strings attached relationship simply means that you have no control over when he calls, or if he ever would, and you can't complain. He feels guilty that he is lying to his wife, but then turn the blame on you, making you think it's your idea ... (read in full...)
The Package-Deal Relationship pt.2: When To Introduce Children
Q. Are you currently involved with someone but have yet to introduce them to your children? Are nervous and unsure what type of response you may get from your kids or the person that you're seeing if you do introduce them? Well here's what you ...
A. 23 October 2011: Children under 6 is the easiest and least resistant when it comes to stepparenting. You said the best time to introduce children is after you decided on the one, which may take up to 2 years to find that person. It takes a few more years to become a ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with or even support my daughter when her partner does everything to alienate her from us?
Q. I am in my early sixties, happily married. My daughter lives in Ireland and is a single mother even if she lives with her partner. They are both unemployed. How do you deal with your daughter's partner when he shows signs of personality disorder...
A. 22 October 2011: Without financial support your daughter would find it unbearable to live with him and she would have no choice to move back in with you. Her partner is able to control her mind but is very dumb indeed. There is no way to deal with a personality ... (read in full...)
I know he wants to be with his son but shouldn't he be with me too?
Q. Im in a difficult situation, ive been with my boyfriend nearly a yr hes has a son and I have a daughter! He has his son every wkend and my daughter goes to her dads every other wkend! The thing is he pretty much lives with all wk then every wk end ...
A. 22 October 2011: I wouldn't want to move down there. Now he is at least in some kind of a relationship, no longer alone but his heart is not invested. Maybe he is still recovering from a heartbreak, adjusting to single parenthood. If you want another kid then he is ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend never sees me should I call it a day
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been going out for about 9 months we get on so well but part of me thinks thats because we have a texting relationship. Every time i ask him to come round he always makes some kind of excuse, I know he works some weekends as ...
A. 22 October 2011: Talk to him first, tell him a texting relationship is not what you want and see how he responds. You can get closure better when he agrees that you shouldn't be together if you can't be happy.... (read in full...)
Fiance has cerebral palsy and is very self conscious about it. How do I help him?
Q. When I first met my fiance (friend at the time), I never thought that I would have fallen for him as hard as I did. One thing about him is that he has a disablity called 'Cerebal Palsy'. He has a mild case of it, but it makes it so he has to wear ...
A. 22 October 2011: You need to live in a different neighbourhood. Praise him for his good qualities. You should refrain from acting like a therapist because it shows that you are in a higher position and luckier than him. The more you do that the more he is going to ... (read in full...)
Why is my fiance so kind to me and I don't return it?
Q. I am 28 and my girlfriend is 36 years old and but she is amazingly fit and looking stunning beautiful We are together for the last 2 years. I am not that explicit in expressing my feelings. When she says I love you , I just reciprocate her with...
A. 22 October 2011: That's because you don't love her yet. Maybe you never will. I am surprised this is your fiance and she has yet to hear you say I love you. She is pursuing you but you don't have that magical feeling. It would be unkind to her down the road if you ... (read in full...)
I love her but she's confused on which path to take!
Q. I am a 35 year old girl who has been in a relationship with another girl for 8 months.She has asked me for a break between us, to see what she really wants.She says she loves me but she is confused on what path to take.To be with a man in order to ...
A. 16 October 2011: In my country and province, gay marriage is accepted. Not every gay couple believes in marriage but it's not uncommon to see gay couples with children (biological or adopted) so each kid has two fathers or two mothers.
Your country does not reco... (read in full...)
How can I be more fun with my g/f? She thinks I'm boring
Q. Hello I been running into a problem lately with my girlfriend and she thinks I'm boring. I don't know why I try to have fun she likes to sing dance and tell jokes(raunchy kind) and just be hyper and what not. I myself like to do these too maybe not ...
A. 16 October 2011: You are just setting yourself traps by trying to accomodate your girlfriend. There will never be enough fun in her life. The mind of an Add person goes like this, it's like a ticking time bomb in his/her head saying, "what next! what next!" This is ... (read in full...)
Mini-makeout session? girls 18-19: how far would you expect the guy to go on your first date with him?
Q. I am going to get mixed answers here, no doubt. This is aimed at the girls. As an 18 or 19 year old, how far would you expect a guy to go on a first date? Would a mini make out session be too much? How come in the movies couples seem to sleep with ...
A. 15 October 2011: I have never seen 18, 19 year old couples sleep on the first date in typical hollywood movies. You don't have to kiss every girl and treat her lavishly the first date, what if you don't like her the next day? I assume you and her both like each ... (read in full...)
He wasn't like this at the start. He rebuffs me sexually. Should I act cool in the morning even though his refusal upsets me?
Q. my boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 months now, and i seriously believe whole heartedly that we are meant to be together we are two of a kind, and we have fallen for each other so quickly. He treats me absolutely amazingly and always puts me ...
A. 15 October 2011: A woman will always want more while a man needs time to recharge his batteries. I know how you feel. I also made a comparison of before and after. The feeling of "now, nothing" can be unbearable. He may not know why he couldn't keep up when before ... (read in full...)
Is this a normal FWB relationship?
Q. Hi everyone I was just wondering if this is a normal fwb relationship me and this man are having sex and we can't get enough of each other this has been going on since february we have a really good time together get on really well we are plan...
A. 13 October 2011: People probably think of FWBs as like in the movie with Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake. Very rigid, mechanical and a total avoidance of feelings. In fact there are variations in how and when people do relationships and none should be categorized ... (read in full...)
How do you talk to guys you like?
Q. I have had a crush on this guy for several years but i'm kind of shy. Me and him are sort of friends but we don't talk to each other often. a few weeks ago he started texting me after he broke up with his girlfriend and we hung out once or twice ...
A. 13 October 2011: I don't think you should like this guy so soon. Many people break up just to find out later that they had the time and space apart to think things through, and that it's worth it to continue where they left off. During the break up, people can be ... (read in full...)
Is he putting his son's needs or her needs before mine?
Q. Would love opinions on this. When dating a man with a child and exwife, is it wrong for my feelings to be taken into consideration too? I would never keep someone away from their child, in this case a teenager (they share custody). My proble...
A. 13 October 2011: It makes perfect sense that you felt uncomfortable when his ex acts like a light bulb in front of your family. You said you tried to talk to him and it ended in a fight. No one's needs is above another. You are all equal. Your husband should learn ... (read in full...)
My wife doesn't like me singing sad songs, will this affect our relationship? Or will she just get over it?
Q. I have been in a very healthy relationship with my American wife here for the last ten months. We met through Online dating and remained in a relationship for one year before getting married December last year in Pakistan and then moved to USA a...
A. 12 October 2011: She can get over it. Perhaps you can ask her why she suspects that you think there is something wrong in the relationship, since this has been your life time habit. We all have our private quirks. Tell her she has one too and you don't mind a bit ... (read in full...)
I keep having dreams about a girl.....
Q. I think I'm in love with this girl because I saw her at a store the other day and my heart started pounding really fast, I got light headed, I was weak in the knees, and I got dizzy. Here's the catch: she's my best friend's sister. Let's call my ...
A. 12 October 2011: Talk to A about what the unspoken rule means to him, just about the general idea. Remember the wildest infatuations can mean nothing in real life. if you befriend B it's possible she's acting nothing like what you had in your dreams and ... (read in full...)
I keep having dreams about a girl.....
Q. I think I'm in love with this girl because I saw her at a store the other day and my heart started pounding really fast, I got light headed, I was weak in the knees, and I got dizzy. Here's the catch: she's my best friend's sister. Let's call my ...
A. 12 October 2011: You are infatuated with B and it is very strong. The body symptoms are very real but your body does not think, and it does not not who's the one. It dictates who you are attracted to, and sometimes there will be wasted energy. One day A would be ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my best friend and it's complicated
Q. A couple months ago, I finally told my female best friend that I've had feelings for her for 3 years. She is also lesbian, but she admitted that likes someone she'll never get (another married woman who's 10 years older than we are) and she can't ...
A. 12 October 2011: "Should I try out a relationship with someone like this?"
I believe you will try it out no matter what she said. You won't be satisfied with just friend but you both crossed the line and felt the tension that's hard to remove. You are both sing... (read in full...)
Am I shrinking or is she getting loose?
Q. so the other day me and my girlfriend was having sex.. it seems as thought she is getting really loose now.. i gotta admit im a pretty small guy and i am pretty small down there, but now it seems like i can't really feel her as much as i use to..and ...
A. 9 October 2011: Vaginas don't get loose for no reason.
At the beginning it's tight. Now she doesn't need as much stimulation to open up, to get aroused. That's my guess. The elasticity in each girl is different. You can only know the truth by comparing with othe... (read in full...)
I can say for a fact that we are both in love with each other and we always will love each other
Q. Me and this girl have been dating for over a year and I can say for a fact that we are both in love with each other and we always will love each other. We've never cheated on each other. Here recently in the relationship, we haven't been able to see ...
A. 9 October 2011: You guys are still trying to figure out what works. She is assuming that hanging out as just friends won't make her miss you as much. There is a saying out of sight out of mind. However it's going to be hard when feelings are strong and you know ... (read in full...)
Ex-boyfriend and I remained best friends until he found someone else
Q. I'll try to keep this simple, since it's a complicated situation to begin with. I'm 24 years old. I was in a serious relationship with my ex for 4 years, we shared our lives together, he even lived at my house for a year. All though we fought a lot, ...
A. 9 October 2011: Your feelings are conflicted. You mentioned you can't love any other man, but you have other plans rather than getting married and having kids. Have you ever negotiated when to get married and when to have kids? I understand that having a kid would ... (read in full...)
Should I wait until the holidays are over to leave him?
Q. I'm 22, I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years and we have a 3 year old son. I've been miserable in the relationship for the past 2 years but we've both tried to make it work the whole time. If we didn't have a kid together I'd be long gone. I'm ...
A. 9 October 2011: If you both had mentally checked out then a break up won't feel like a harsh blow. Whether you make the final talk is up to you but that won't stop the holiday celebrations, specially when you say he is basically a good man. When you find a new man ... (read in full...)
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