A
male
age
41-50,
bmt1380
writes:Nice guys are divided into 2 catagories. The first is the "self proclaimed" (SP). this is the guys that seems to scream, "I'm a nice guy!" These guys are oozing charm on the surface but when you get down to it they are just your "typical male". They always know just what to say, but in the end you find out that all that smooth talking and charm was only surface deep. They could care less how much they hurt or demolish a woman as long as they get what they want. When a womans usefulness is no longer there, they tend to drop and run. Be rest assured though, there will come a day when true love finally hits them like a ton of bricks and they will find that they fell in love with a woman just like him. Its a match made in heaven but in the end, nice guys finish last.The second is the "big brother" (BB) nice guy. This is the guy that always, when it comes to women, gets put into the "big brother" catagory. These are the guys that have hearts so big that they almost seem to have the soul of a woman. They are natural caretakers. They are attentive, they listen, they walk 3 miles in the snow to bring u chicken noodle soup when u have the flu and they dont have a car. These are the guys that shower u with compliments, but only if they are true. They will tell u when and if an outfit isnt working for you. Yet they still find a way to let you know that u are beautiful. They are the guys that are filled with so much love that their hearts are easily broken. They are the guys that are so often so easily discarded. They learn to accept this fact and know it will happen but they are strong enough to keep trying. nice guys always finish last.In short ladies, if u want a guy that will be your best friend and a strong honest loyal lover; look to your "big brother" and who knows maybe for once the true nice guy will win that marathon called true love
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (25 October 2011):
 The reason why nice guys finish last is because the good guy behaviours such as caring, gentleness and child rearing are associated with lower testosterone levels. A guy who is adventurous, flirtatious, and risk taking have higher testosterone levels, therefore more attractive to a woman. This animal passion and drive is irrational and romantic love is based on this, more so than logic of who's a good man who's not. Having made a contrast between the two types of males, it is not to say that a good man can't be confident and exciting too. Statistically the second type nice guys get turned down so much that they lose their confidence, thinking they are on the wrong track and therefore become less outgoing. They should be encouraged to take more risks and not take rejections personally.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (21 October 2011):
 I'm really tired of this clishè. It's way too simplistic. What happened for example to the immature men who are nice, sure enough, they find love, and then they reverse 180 degrees because they need to "find themselves" or something? And what happened to the nice, but shy guy, who probably would make a great boyfriend, but he's too scared to tell the bloody woman? Is that also the woman's fault?I'm feeling tired of this idea that "women" as a whole supposedly over-look great boyfriend material. It's simply not true. We look hard every darn day to find someone worth while, and then the effort is ridiculed and "nice guys finish last". So it's the womens fault that these supposedly nice guys can't pull out the finger and make a move? We're here, we're waiting for you! Just come on out of wherever you are hiding. And, what happened to the "nice girl"? Because, yes, she exists too. And she has to go through just as many frogs to find her prince as any nice guy needs to plow through his frogs to find a princess. I've dated and been in relationships with men the outside world judged to be "nice guys", and the verdict is that most of the time the immature, emotionally unavailable, and passive aggressive are being portrayed to the outside world as "mr. nice guy". Because no one knows any better and no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. And trust me, they aren't getting it easier in their love life than any other man. In fact, I will argue the opposite. The actually nice guys out there are already in a relationship. Because a woman knows when she's found someone nice and she clings on to him. That doesn't mean he's found a nice woman though, plenty of women are bad women who just take advantage. But in either case, my point is that there's no real difference between any type of man when it comes to getting a relationship. You can be a jerk and you can be nice, finding someone suitable to be in a relationship with will always be a game of chance and luck. I will also add one last thing, and that is something quite serious which you might or might not be aware of. The psychopaths, the abusers, the manipulative people, they are very charming, convincing, and to everyone they appear as a great person, down to earth, stable and loving, amazing, and an overall "nice guy". But then behind closed doors they are the worst sort of people. You can not look at someone and see if they are nice or bad, just from appearance and how they act towards you. It takes time, a minimum of 7 months into a relationship, I prefer to say a year, before you get to know someone. Now that is the true test of whether a person is truly a nice person or not.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2011): I agree that the "big brother" is what women actually want, although they often end up with Mr. Typical or the bad guy. It is irrational. But also because I think most women can't believe that a guy could actually care about them or their feelings. Maybe I'm bitter but I've come to the conclusion that the majority of men are like your first guy. He "thinks" he's a nice guy, but he's not. He "says" he cares, but he actually doesn't. He wants the woman I call Media Girl, (the girl I think 95% of men are looking for, but only 20% of men actually get.) Media girl is exactly like any girl you see in every single protagonist from t.v. show and movie, between the age of 16-40. Media girl is thin, "hot," a 10, and who behaves like she lives in the "Sex in the City" world. Men think all women are this way. ALL woman. And if a girl is chubby, or dorky, or awkward, or not media pretty, then she's not "his type." But in the end, no matter what girl a guy gets, odds are he's going to stomp all over her heart unless she is from those breeds of women who behave just like the bad guys out there. Because in truth, nice girls often finish last as well.
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